Hey /adv/
This girl I've been seeing was raped tonight. She likes to party, she stays out late, and occasionally does coke. She is currently visiting a big city and theres nothing I can do about it.
She was out late with some people that she had met there. On her own. She was eventually looking for a cab at 4AM. At this point a man came up behind her and held both her arms behind her.
She walked past a doorman and all the way up into his apartment. Once inside he forced himself on her. The man said he needed to use the bathroom at this point she made her escape back into the elevator and into a taxi.
She doesn't think the man came inside her.
The story doesn't seem to add up to me. Why wouldn't she immediately start yelling as soon as this man grabbed her? Why wouldn't she scream for help at the doorman? Why wouldn't she scream while in the apartment while she was getting raped?
She contacted the police, but cannot remember the exact location. The police also said since he didnt cum inside her that they would have a harder time following up on this.
What can I do to help?
Why wouldn't some ask for help?
Do you think there is more to this story?
>occasionally does coke.
Drop her
Not your fucking problem
>>17022580
She tells me its only once a month at the most, but I'm thinking since she was in the big city till 4am maybe she was?
>>17022589
Once EVER is too much. You don't need the chaos of hard drugs in your life no pussy is worth that shit. Toss it in the trash.
>This girl I've been seeing was raped tonight. She likes to party, she stays out late, and occasionally does coke.
No she wasn't. Drop her, move on.
>>17022598
You're not really answer my main question here.
Why wouldn't yell/scream that shes getting kidnapped?
>>17022567
I hate to be that guy but she probably wasn't raped. Probably regrets having sex with that guy, knew she'd have to tell you eventually and freaked the fuck out. And now she came up with a giant elaborate story to cover her ass. Or she was fucked up on Coke and super paranoid. And trust me, no one does Coke just once a month.
>>17022607
Why would she go through all the trouble? She could have just not told me anything if she was just banging some dude. She was crying and seemed sincere. From what she told me that some guy just grabbed her off the street and pulled her inside.
I've been to parties in the past where some girl with a bf goes into a bedroom with another guy and comes out screaming after she fooled around with another guy. Do you think its something similar?
>>17022614
>I've been to parties in the past where some girl with a bf goes into a bedroom with another guy and comes out screaming after she fooled around with another guy. Do you think its something similar?
She went through the trouble of calling the cops.
>doing coke just once a month
>this is what non coke users believe
In all honesty OP she probably got railed out on coke, came to her senses and realized she fucked up. And made up an elaborate story to cover her tracks.
Ask her if she filed a police report and watch her squirm. Tell her you're going down to the station to file on her behalf and watch the whole facade come tumbling down
>>17022567
She needs to go to the hospital and have a rape kit done ASAP.
Now is not the time to be questioning her.
Doesn't she fucking know the guy's exact apartment number? It won't be hard for the police to follow up on this.
And the doorman will have witnessed this shit if he was really holding her arms behind her and forcing her up to the apartment.
Handle this very sensitively, but insistently. "You need to file a police report- what building was the apartment at? Wha did the guy look like? Go to the hospital and get a rape kit done"
Certain responses are bullshit "...I don't remember which building it was"
"Ok well what did it look like? Describe the building and the interior"
Right down as many details as possible.
Op it is a distinct possibility that she is lying, especially since she like does Coke and shit her brain and emotions could be very fucked up. At this stage, don't try to call her out on any bullshit.
i have a friend on Coke who pulls this shit all the time, she's told me she's been raped like 5 times.
Last time, she was drinking in her apartment for her birthday and it was getting late and people were leaving so I put her to bed with her roommate (also a girl) in the same bed and waited for a while and then left.
Apparently, in the middle of the night she woke up, texted some guy to come pick her up, fucked him at his apartment, and spent the night.
Then she texts me the next morning about how she was "raped" and shit and I'm just like ugh not this again. Like I literally put her to sleep IN HER BED and she somehow still gets raped that night??? Smh. Coke girls are fucking crazy bro
>>17022624
She had no reason to even tell me. She could have just kept it a secret. I would have never found out , shes in a whole different state. Why would she even bother telling me?
>>17022627
She can't remember we she was, she said something like "I have a terrible sense of directions" She even made an effort to try and have a friend help her find the address through her phones location, but no luck
>>17022624
This.
Op girls who are on Coke have really fucked up emotion/minds.
Maybe she just really wants sympathy and attention from you so she made up some shit to get your pity.
Who fucking knows- but if she really did get raped then 1) there should be recordings of the guy with her in the lobby 2) the doorman is an eyewitness and 3) she should know the building and apartment number of the guy who "raped" her.
So, file a fuckijg police report. Why would she not??!
>>17022628
Because she needed to justify her guilt and absolve herself of any responsibility.
Now the guy she got coked out with and fucked is a rapist so in no way is she responsible for what happened.
>>17022634
See, that's a bullshit excuse.
I've actually been raped- I didn't know the location either, but when someone asked me I immediately started describing as much as I could about what I remembered.
Giving vague answers like "I'm bad with directions..." That's an excuse, not an answer. There are plenty of ways to figure out where the place is. Where was the club she was at? What are the apartment buildings around there? You gotta use some process of elimination.
It sounds like she doesn't actually want to solve any of the problems here, she just wants your sympathy and attention.
>>17022635
She didn't know the address, so she didn't file one. She just called and they said they could do a rape kit.
>>17022567
>She likes to party, she stays out late, and occasionally does coke. She is currently visiting a big city and theres nothing I can do about it.
Unless it was a nigger that raped her she deserved this.
>>17022567
Nah fuck her seriously. My ex is a fucking lying slut and she claimed she was almost raped just to get my sympathy. How do I know she was lying? her story simply did not add up - and when I tried to clarify the obscure bits she would either make up excuses of "I can't remember" "I don't want to talk about this" or become angry as to why I was asking when she was the one that told me in the first place. Fuck her man, I really hope you dont get fucked over by her
>>17022643
How could I get more information out of her?
Say something like "hey were you doing coke last night?" She'll probably tell me to fuck off.
What can I say to her to get more information?
>>17022643
Also shes already asleep while I'm up freaking out.
>>17022652
>My ex is a fucking lying slut and she claimed she was almost raped just to get my sympathy.
If the girl does any substances the chances she actually got raped are about 0.000001 Percent.
>>17022656
She said things like "I don't even like its my own body" "I feel gross", stuff from what I can tell a rape victim would say.
also- who called the police, you or her? She probably said she did atleast. And what did she say they told her "it will be hard to follow up" because he didn't cum inside her? No police officer would say that, especially in this situation. If you call the police and say "I've just been raped"- they don't pick apart your situation, they send an ambulance to take you to the hospital for a rape kit and then they get your statements about what happened.
What, do you think the police officer asked her over the phone "oh well did he cum inside? If not then we can't help you". There are ALL SORTS of ways to get physical evidence for a rape and police officers KNOW that. There is still plenty of evidence that can be collected from a rape kit that will prove she was raped if she really was. No police officer would dismiss something like that, especially not before getting statements and looking at the evidence from the rape kit.
I have serious doubts as to whether or not she made a police report.
Op it sounds like she just wants your sympathy. I know a girl who lies about shit like that for attention all the time, I've literally caught her in a lie before when she claimed she was assaulted at s club one night and she was actually sleeping over with a girl pal that night in a totally different state than where she claimed to be
op, I've been raped before so I don't advocate victim blaming or skepticism in most cases-
But seriously, fuck this chick.
From what I can see from what you've said this far, this chick is lying through her teeth and using you for sympathy. She probably misses you and wants you to get all riled up so that she can feel protected and "loved" by you.
This is a manipulation tactic. She wants to strengthen the way that you feel about her so she's trying to look helpless so that you'll feel a strong need to protect her in the future.
Red flags everywhere op.
She should have had a rape kit done immediately. I don't know why she didn't- she's literally losing evidence as she's sleeping away.
The police interaction sounds very sketchy, like the police that handled my cases didn't act like that at all.
And her "how she feels" crap is very cliche. Maybe she's just reading differently than I did, but when you get raped you don't say shit like that. Yeah you feel gross and shit but "I feel like my body isn't even my own"???? Oh my god like that is so transparent. That's clearly manipulative. Who the fuck says that kind of melodramatic shit right after they'd been RAPED???
>>17022661
She did. She told me "That she could come down to the station and take a rape kit test" I think she said that since he didn't ejaculate inside her that it may be harder to get information. Something along those lines.
>>17022677
If she isn't telling the truth what can I say to her?
How could I get her to admit to it?
>>17022567
>trolling /adv/ doesnt take any effort anymore
>>17022677
IMO I was already giving her too much attention.
I think she already felt pretty loved by me, if not overly loved.
>>17022681
AHHH NO
ok-
First of all, they don't do rape kits at the station. Police men are not authorized to give rape kits, she would need to go to a HOSPITAL to get a nurse who has been specially trained to collect that information and store it in a safe way to do the rape kit.
The nurse swabs the inside of the vagina and uses special chemicals to show sperm and fluids. She also swabs the mouth, documents any cuts and bruises, swabs under the fingernails, etc.
Even if he didn't cum in her, theyMd be able to collect DNA from inside of her vagina, and they could use that DNA evidence to confirm that the guy had sex with her that night.
There is PLENTY of evidence to be had in a rape kit, and the police would have STONGLY advocated that she have a rape kit done.
The police that found me literally borderline FORCED me to go to the hospital to have one done. I kept saying "no" because I didn't want to pay like 1000$ for the ambulance that they called, and so one of the cops literally agreed to drive me to the hospital in her car if I went.
>>17022701
In her defense I believe she did say she would have gone to the hospital. I think she may have just been so traumatized, and she already in the taxi and just wanted to go home in a safe place?
>>17022687
You can't get her to admit it. She never will, and any prodding you do to imply she may be lying will piss her off.
The best thing you can try to do to expose her is by asking for speficific details in an attempt to help her "remember things that can later be used as evidence"
>>17022698
There's different kinds of affection. Some girls like to see the guys they like i'm get riled up and angry and protective/possessive, and will put themselves in dangerous positions or lie about dangerous experiences to evoke this reaction. This is extremely common in chicks with Coke problems and BPD chicks- which is why most of us are assuming that this chick is one of the manipulative ones. Her story doesn't add up and she uses Coke- thatMs like two major red flags
>>17022707
She was telling me about things as she tried to remember where she was. She mentioned the guy had a dog, and was able to describe it in detail.
I do believe her when she says she doesn't do coke much.
I just don't know why she didn't start screaming. She talks about how she made eye-contact with the doorman, and how "he knew what was going on". Maybe she just froze somehow?
>>17022713
The guy had a dog? Like in the apartment, or with him?
Yeah it makes sense for girls to freeze if they feel like they're in danger. Like maybe she thought that he had a weapon and might go crazy if she screamed
>>17022707
I found 2 articles that support both sides of my situation.
No screaming or yelling
https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/grade-point/wp/2015/06/23/why-many-rape-victims-dont-fight-or-yell/
and lies
http://www.returnofkings.com/6886/3-signs-shes-making-a-false-rape-accusation
>>17022715
In the apartment I believe.
>>17022716
Not fighting is common-
A very large threatening person who has the potential to hurt you is threatening you, you think you're a lot more likely to not get hurt if you just go along with whatever he wants.
It's basically like, he's strong enough to do what he wants to me whether I comply or not- if I fight it will just be more painful and risky for me
>>17022713
So she can remember the dog, but not the features of the building or the guy?
Questionable
>>17022730
Here's an article about how rape victims have fragmented memories
http://time.com/3625414/rape-trauma-brain-memory/
>>17022567
>>the police said since he never came...
LEO here. No cop in this country would ever say that to a freshly raped victim.
>>17022780
While I'm at it, if she talked to the police, she'll have paperwork. On that paperwork will be a last name or badge number (aka DSN) of the responding officer.
Call a non emergency line and ask them to have that officer call you. He or she won't tell you shit, but if you're clever about how you ask you can ascertain if it happened or not.
Whole fucking thing sounds sketchy to me OP, but stranger things have happened.
>>17022610
Unless he had a weapon, she was either too drunk/high to do anything about it, or she's just lying to you
why do you care honestly?
you are not some sherlock holmes who can piece together the whole thing when the only person involved is her and you think she is unreliable.
what do you have to lose by taking what she said at face value?
either dump her right now or let that shit go. nothing good will come from you plaing detective and asking her all kinds of questions.
Seriously op...
Does she even sound like a keeper?
No she doesn't. Just see her off after a few weeks to allow her time to get her shit in order..
>>17023032
OP here, I think this is the real story, but shes not admitting to/cares to include this part of the story.
>>17023180
I think this is the route I'm going to take. I looked up HIV testing, and it can stay dormant for up 6 months.
I'm worried that now this happened, shes going to get heavy into drugs if shes not already. Maybe it was a wake up call for her to not stay out till 4AM and walk around like nothings going to happen?
>>17023582
Homie coke heads are going to fiend for coke no matter what. Point is, once you break up with her your obligation to her is precisely 0
Stop justifying her, godammit. If you really care about her, even if she is lying or not, take her to the hospital and check the results by yourself.
>>17023633
She refuses to go to the hospital, and will make an appointment with local planned parenthood on her own to get checked up. I told her I would even make the appointment and go with her. I don't know why shes dragging her feet on this.
>>17023654
Think of those reasons... And try to select one of them that is good for her, you, or your relationship?
She has been fun.. But a bit of a slow motion roadcrash.
Embrace your freedom.
>>17023663
This is my theory so far. She was out. Met some guy to do coke with. Went back to his place for my coke. Things went sour. She ran out of there.
>She walked past a doorman and all the way up into his apartment. Once inside he forced himself on her.
Ahahahaha
No. She wasn't raped. Time to move on fuccboi
>>17022616
Regret, guilt.. Powerful emotions. She wasn't raped. Move the fuck on you idiot
>>17023679
Honestly if she would have just said I fucked some guy Oops sorry. I probably wouldn't have given too shits.
>>17023686
Oh so you're just more of a hands-on cuckold huh? Like to be involved?
>>17023695
Lol not a total cuck, I would just go fuck someone else and then we would get on with our lives, but this is way more intense.
>>17023654
She refuses to go to a hospital because she will be found out. Do you really think she's going to keep to her "promise" to go to Planned Parenthood?
I hate to be that guy but I'm fairly certain she's trying to pull the wool over your eyes
>What can I do to help?
We can't know the answer to that question. When you want to help someone, you have to ask them what they need.
>Why wouldn't some ask for help?
I don't think hypothetical guesswork is appropriate.
>Do you think there is more to this story?
Yes.
>>17023701
Well in any case sorry for being harsh but u could do better than a girl like her and u shouldnt waste ur time. Im only being a dick to get through to you
>>17023706
She's on a plane back early just get out of that situation. She'll be home today. Any speculations on what more to the story?
>>17023724
>I don't think hypothetical guesswork is appropriate.
>Any speculations?
I think you have your own issues to work on.
>>17022598
Pussy.
Seriously the stigma with hard drugs is too funny. No you won't get addicted, brain damage, etc from doing it once. Occasionally is fine but if it's everyday then might be a problem.
>>17022567
she tried to score coke and ended up getting raped in an apartment at 4am.
You're girlfriends a whore. SJW feminist in training
>>17023866
This is what I've come to suspect. Why would the guy that raped her so casually use the bathroom in the middle of sex?
>>17022580
>>17022598
What a brainwashed fucking faggot you are.
