I think that a cheap way to suicide, without making it look intentional, is choking on food. Specifically peanut butter, as it is already a choking hazard before any intentional lodging attempts are made. People would further understand that such a substance would be difficult to remove, especially if the wad was lodged far down the throat.
It is common among my friends to eat a spoonful of peanut butter plain. I think that any involuntary convulsions would mask the look of intentional placement.
Is this a good plan? I don't particularly care that it would hurt, or make me look ridiculous. All death is undignified enough to not care about that. Seriously, you will shit and piss yourself no matter how it happens. Then, if nobody was expecting your death or your company, you will bloat in a puddle of your own excrement, probably in a weird position with a dumb look on your face. That is how all people die.
>>16998358
Suffocation is one of the most painful and terrifying ways to die. Your body will try every method it can to breathe again, this isn't an option.
It's like when a little kid holds his breath, it's a stupid plan
>>16998358
One of the worst and most prolonged ways to die . Also, high chan e of survival. Your body can typically go six minutes with air. Once they clear your airway, you're back to living and hen you are the loser who almost died to peanut butter.
Same way with drowning, you actually puke a bunch before drowning - hence you actually suffocate from your own puke before the water fully makes it down.
>>16998358
Sounds like it would be difficult to reliably ensure your death, and if you fail then for the rest of your life you're the dummy who nearly killed himself eating peanut butter.
>>16998365
Fine, then. Do you have any better ideas for dying in a way that looks accidental?
As I said before, pain is not an issue. Price is.
Additionally, relying on somebody else to kill me properly might be a bad idea. What if I am only mugged or badly injured, both situations which would make killing myself more difficult?
>>16998374
You could fake an accidental death by auto-erotic asphyxiation. Pull your pants down, stick a banana up your ass, put on a pair of lace panties, start jerking off, and hang yourself.
>>16998369
Where do you think you are, buddy? I definitely have more than six uninterrupted minutes of being alone.
>>16998373
The biggest issue here is figuring out how to keep myself from dislodging the peanut butter.
To the both of you: once again, price and certainty are factors. Pain is not.
>>16998384
That's fair! My family is fairly evangelical, so this would be covered up well. My friends would only find this to be slightly out of character.
>>16998358
Just blow your brains out like a normal person.
>>16998358
Why not shove spoonfulls of peanut butter up your ass until you choke? Same effect.
>>16998415
Nope. I need the insurance money to cover some debts.
>>16998478
Why do you care about debts if you're going to be dead?
Also, accidental death by train is not uncommon and plausible. E.g., tripping onto tracks, car ignoring crossing signals, etc.
>>16998487
Hm, good idea on trains.
As for debts, I dislike the people effected enough to not be bothered by their death-related sadness, which will last for three weeks at an unrealistic best, but I like them enough to not want to welsh on a large sum of money.
Get a hotel room. Trash it so it looks like there was a party. Overdose on heroin.
Boom. Your family will think you're just an idiot that partied too hard. Maybe you did kill yourself but they'll never be sure.
It's not very painful, it's relatively cheap, and in a high enough dosage is very effective.
