I can't give much advice here, I know depression and all that jazz can be shitty. But what else is shitty is that we have countless humans being guinea pigged around on different medications, dosages and other medications to counteract the side effect of their other medications. What you're describing is your medication not working, obviously and no more than that, and i'd find a new psychiatrist, therapy or new methods of coping. Plenty of people feel this way.

Once your psychiatrist gets the right mix and dosage of medications you'll feel much better.

Your brain chemistry is off. Your brain is working against you. Your psychiatrist is trying to fix this. It takes a bit of time, but once you have it, it's much easier to tweak when your brain chemistry shifts again.

You don't have to chin up. Just keep plodding forward. At some point, despite how you feel now, you'll be in a much better place.

>>16990366
I agree here. What I wish I had known when i started with therapy and psychiatry is that you don't always get the perfect fitting therapist and psychiatrist right off the bat.

You have to find one that is a personal fit for YOU.

>>16990366
I could try finding a new psychologist because there's plenty in my area... my psychiatrist would be very had to change due to how shitty my insurance is. Being poor is such a crutch to my life...

>>16990372
I really hope so. This has been so hard to bare.

>>16990328
>>16990380
And doing so is hard, I don't want to say psychiatrists are in it for the money, but considering how much they accomplish per session and how much they charge per session, it really does seem many don't have your best interest at heart either. I was in and out of psychiatric care for a disorder my parents were CONVINCED I had but it turned out, I didn't. I went off medication and whatnot and my grades and behavior improved and I could finally feel normal and have since been a well respected, functioning member of society. But that's enough about my life. ADHD and similar disorders are over diagnosed, and what you have is very much real and should be discussed accordingly.

Some times the best 'psychologist' can be a friend or someone to talk to and won't charge you ridiculous rates and you may actually accomplish something. Getting things off your chest always helps and doing it to someone anonymously you met online can also help if you don't feel ready or are unable to open up to a close friend. Be sure NOT to give out personal information or anything they could use against you though. God forbid we (or those you find online) can't prescribe you medication, but trust me. Friends help a lot once you get past the fact you feel like a burden to everyone around you, Id work on that a little bit and go from there. Opening up to family would actually be a last resort in my opinion and from personal experience sharing feelings with family often backfires.

>>16990419

You're super edgy. So, you convinced your parents, through your actions, that you had a serious mental issue--and you blame the system for trying to help you?

If people were in anything for the money, they would go into banking and not medicine. Even people who go into something for the wrong reasons still want to have good days and do a good job, just like everyone else. Psychiatrists are still people, trying to do as best they can for their patients. Brain chemistry is not all laid out bare for them to diagnose and fix in one session. Many medications need a couple months to see if they have they touch the right buttons on their patient. Compound this over years. This is the reality for most people.

It doesn't make them all in it for the money. It doesn't make them psychics that see you were a liar all along about your personal "condition."

tl;dr You're edgy and dangerous. Shut the fuck up.

>>16990449
You're also missing the point. I was just stating a personal anecdote that psychiatrists and associated fields do have some blatant corruption and issues, but no, not all are bad, weeding out thr good and the bad ones no matter the reason often leaves many people with too much wasted time, and to someone suicidal it may be too late for them by the time they do, even then finding one fit for YOU is hard. Many people in care rely solely on professional help and do little to nothing to better themselves or correct their problems. I'd also say many don't take the advice of the professional theyre in the care of, and some patients aren't a good fit for the care theyre recieving. Professional help should be a crutch at best, NOT life support.

All Ima say now though is, help OP or gtfo. This isn't a thread or board meant for attacking others. Go back to /b/ or /pol/ with this crap.

>>16990419
In my case, my parents know I suffer from major depression, but psychiatry isn't an approach they wanted me to take. They wanted me to trust and believe in 'god.' I don't doubt that their decision didn't work for them, but it hasn't for me. My psychiatrist seems to have good intentions... I just am hard to work with at times... especially because of how often I cry and how sensitive I get. He's the reason why I started seeing a psychologist in the first place... because he treats with medicine and can't help me if I'm just trying to talk out my problems and occurrences.

Friends could be helpful, but as I already stated, I don't have the friends willing to sit down and talk these things out with me. I'm the last resort in the end...

My boyfriend is helpful once in a while, but he's self centered. If I'm not focusing on him, I'm not very useful it seems...

>>16990480
You need to ask your friends and stop assuming. If they were true friends theyd let you rant and vent to them for atleast 5 minutes. You need to be HONEST and OPEN with them. Just ask 'hey, can we talk? I really need to get some stuff off my chest' even if it's just over text. Like I said. You feel like a burden to them and you need to move past that. I'd also dump your boyfriend. He seems quite toxic to someone with your problems. Relationships should have to be focused around attention THAT much. And I know I'd do anything for someone I supposedly loved. As for your parents, God may or may not exist. Who knows. only time will tell. I don't blame you for not wanting to put all your faith in God, and seeking a tried and true method, that's proving not to be so tried and 'true'

>>16990509
Also, shouldn't* you'll figure out where I messed up.

>>16990328
Fire your psychologist, find a LICSW, a therapist. Read the wiki about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and find a therapist who will work with you on it. Buy the book "Feeling Good" by David Burns.

>>16990372
I am an M.D., became board certified last year. There is -zero- scientific evidence to support the 'brain chemistry' model for mental illnesses. It's propaganda distributed by companies like Pfizer to sell pills. There are no studies to support any sort of cause/effect relationship between these chemicals and mental illness. Given the effectiveness of CBT/DBT (challenging the thoughts and beliefs that result in negative emotions), I believe it's possible that almost all, if not all, mental illnesses are caused by negative experiences.

>>16990328
>My psychiatrist just continues to increase my dosages and give me different medications. He doesn't want to hear it.. it's not his job. My psychologist always derails our conversations so it benefits him. He tells me to do basic things I'm already trying.
I don't know how much of this is their fault and how much is just the depression talking (shit-colored glasses), I suggest trying to get perspectives on it from other people, first your friends and family, then us here if you have to: describe your conversations as accurately as possible (as in, tell them exactly what you said, then they said, then you said, like a script).

If they tell you you're right, get a better doctor. Some are just lazy and unwilling to deal with more difficult cases, so they just switch your meds and then you're not their problem for another 1-2 months. When it comes to therapists, the answer is a lot simpler: if you don't have a solid rapport (good communication, trust, etc), you should find a new one. If you're going to switch docs, the new one will help you find a good therapist as well.
If you do this, be honest with the new doc about why you switched to them, it's important for them to know what patients' experiences are with their colleagues and it'll let you skip the diagnostic process and get straight to treatment.

What's your diagnosis anyway? If you suspect it's incorrect, the above procedure is more complicated, since you'll actually want to redo the whole thing.

This >>16990372 is true, it takes time, for some disorders longer than others. For example, most of the first-line bipolar medications aren't even closely related to each other, and have wildly different mechanisms of action, so it's common to try 2 or 3 that do absolutely nothing (or make it worse) before stumbling on one that makes it substantially better.

>>16990533

No you aren't. Guess how I know.

As far as the chemical imbalance statements--to anyone in the field, they know it's a vast simplification. That said, you know a little bit about current trends, and that's quite nice.

But to claim that, say norepineprhine, serotonin, dopamine, GABA, and glutamate "balance" isn't incredibly important is so out of the realm of reality as to be incredibly telling about who you are.

I have a strong belief that talk therapy should be tried first. But I'm, also, not going to get into anything serious with someone pretending to know things they don't have any context for.

>>16990509
I know that they won't... I just do. My mother told me they're fair weather friends... and I've known she's right. I just hang around them when they ask me at random... it does temporarily take the pain away for what it's worth... it just hurts me that it's also the case. The one friend I would even CONCEIVE of asking just makes fun of the situation in order to cheer me up. I start forcing myself to feign happiness until I can go home and sulk in agony...

I don't know how to explain the dynamics of my bf... I feel like he used to be better than how he is now. He hasn't chatted with me that much at all this week, so he'll probably break up with me first anyway...

>>16990533
I have the book Feeling good, a new mood therapy already. My psychologist told me to read it... I got his first name wrong, but the last name I mentioned was the same... I'll attempt to find a LICSW, but idk if my health network will reveal that information to me? Clarify me if I'm wrong...

>>16990548
I suffer from major depressive disorder. My Elevated targeted areas are my cognitive and my emotional. My physiological is considered within normal bounds. I could try making a script about my visits on here, but I don't have many friends and family with experience of going to a psychiatrist or even a psychologist... I seem to be the lonely, fucked up rotten apple.

Stop taking these drugs, they fix you into depression and make you realient on them to feel anything else, they are really a dangerous thing and I don't know how they are legal, step one cut depressants out of your life, will be hard but very much worth it to have your happyness. I.e alcohol/other recreational drugs, tobacco, people that sap your happyness
Step two, add a little more activity to your day, increased oxygen to the brain will improve your mood and increased blood flow will help improve how you physically feel
Step three drink more water, the average person does not drink enough water to stay adiquatly hydrated, and that can cause all sorts of problems from headaches to muscle fatigue and can leave you feel lathargic
Step four death healthy, an sure your body gets all the vitimans and minerals it needs to ensure that your chemical composition is balanced.
If you do all that I can garentee you will feel better, won't cure depression, but it make you feel better about yourself so that you may find for yourself what it is that is making you feel depressed.

Cause and effect you feel these feelings because something causes them don't end your life, cut off the cause

Eat healthy not death healthy

>>16990573
all of these are good things and it is true that if OP does all of them, he'll probably feel better. however, he sounds pretty depressed and may not even be up to doing all these things, at least not on his own.

OP if you have any friends to help you, take them that list in the other anon's post and ask them to help you with it. if you don't have anybody who can help you, find a therapist or social worker like someone said upthread. idk how it is where you are, but in my area they have what are called ARMHS workers who come to your house every so often and help you figure out systems for managing your life. they help you figure out how to get organised or make yourself stick to an exercise regimen. they don't do in-home care per se, but they help you cope with caring for yourself. and that might help you if you can get something like that.

but the important thing is to get someone involved in your life who is in a position to help you. even if you think "well what could they possibly do for me?" you don't know til you try it do you? if you've tried it before and it didn't work, try it again.

source: have dealt with depression on and off for 25 years or so.

Don't worry OP eventually your mind will slip into insanity and the pain will go away.

>>16990419
>Opening up to family would actually be a last resort in my opinion and from personal experience sharing feelings with family often backfires.
Shouldn't take this as a rule, some family members may be very helpful and understanding, others won't. This should usually be obvious, eg it's futile to try to open up to your redneck uncle Cletus.

>>16990480
>They wanted me to trust and believe in 'god.' I don't doubt that their decision didn't work for them, but it hasn't for me.
The religious approach often doesn't work at all, eg a few days ago there was an anon with a father who sounded possibly schizophrenic that was constantly screaming, so the mother told him to say "help me God" and shit.
So he'd spent the last 5 years screaming "HELP ME GOD" at the top of his lungs.

>Friends could be helpful, but as I already stated, I don't have the friends willing to sit down and talk these things out with me. I'm the last resort in the end...
>My boyfriend is helpful once in a while, but he's self centered. If I'm not focusing on him, I'm not very useful it seems...
Sounds like you should try to make some new friends, anon. At least one should have the patience to sit and listen to you, and it helps a lot.
And if your boyfriend can't stand listening to you vent about your life, it sounds like he's not ready for a long-term relationship or just not interested in much more than sex.

>>16990533
Agreed with >>16990559, though after meeting a couple truly stupid docs I wouldn't be surprised if you actually did manage to graduate with such a conception of psychopharmacology.

>>16990562
>My physiological is considered within normal bounds. I could try making a script about my visits on here
Go ahead, writing it out/describing it to someone else often helps you work through and understand a situation better yourself.
>I seem to be the lonely, fucked up rotten apple.
Nope, they more likely just deal with their problems by pretending they don't exist.

I appreciate the responses. I honestly didn't expect any of them. I see a few proposals that have been given... some which kinda seem to collide, but others that have true merit...

I'm.. tired... but I'm going to keep this thread and try to re-read some of this tomorrow after hopefully catching myself.

Gn /adv/