I just split up with my gf of 4 years. It hurts like hell.
I keep thinking about her and how hurt she must be now. I want to go back and say how much I love her, tell her sorry and try to make her feel better but I know I shouldn't and that it'll just make things worse. I'm in tears all the time. What hurts the most is that I helped this person come out of depression and trust people, she said I was her life and soul and now she most think the worst of me, maybe she'll never trust again the same way and it's my fault.
I just went on fb (my mistake I know) and I just saw a post by her that wrote something along the lines of "Some people are just cold and emotionless and aren't worth it"....it was a sting and all her friends agreed, people I used to hangout with, I feel like a monster.
What is the best thing to do at the moment? I can't stop thinking about her and I am in so much pain. I feel like I let down the person who loved me the most even though it had to happen.
Well why did it have to happen? Remind yourself of those reasons by posting them.
>>16985328
Well Tammy, the first thing you should do is nothing.
When we make a hard decision our first impulse is to go back or fix it with the least damage possible.
You must have had good reasons to break with her. Think about them without any judgement and, if you still agree with them it is time for you to seek distraction.
Medical operations hurt as hell when you wake up but they can save your life.
>>16985328
i always fantasize about one of my male friends coming over to mourn the loss of a recent relationship. id get him a beer, we'd play some mario kart, somehow id end up rubbing his feet and then sucking his dick.
then tomorrow we'd pretend like it never happened.
Similar situation with my ex, except 5 years, and we broke up the day after Christmas. It's going to hurt, but honestly I'm happier now that a few months have passed. I won't lie and say that it'll ever be "easy", but your hurt will fade with time. Just preoccupy yourself with other things. For me, I turned to video games and making music. Just taking your mind off it will help a lot.
>>16985333
I'll bulletpoint them
>Kept arguing the past 3 months non stop and then apologizing to each other nonstop
>We wanted different things in life
>She wanted me to be with her all the time even though I was working and running like a mad person here and there. I saw her whenever I could. Almost never saw my friends because of this and was always tired.
>Made her a priority in my life but was always verbally beaten down by her because she said what I gave her wasn't enough.
>Felt enormous pressure to be someone else and do stuff I just didn't feel like
>When she didn't get what she wanted she would either close herself or she would hurt me by saying nasty stuff all the time.
Don't get me wrong, she is not a bad person....deep inside she was a kind soul but she suffers from a horrible past (abusive family, bad relationships) and that is why she would react like that. But it tired me out, I couldn't say a word without her getting mad. I just couldn't take it anymore.....I will always love her though.
>>16985328
Damn I couldn't imagine being with someone that long.
People get on my nerves hell quick yo.
Is it advised to go on holiday?
Is it advised to go and hang out with women whose company I enjoy?
This stuff always hurts. When I broke up with my first love I still remember her walking out the door in tears saying that not only had she lost her lover, she'd also lost her best friend.
Cue us giving it another go and her treating me like shit for the next few months before dumping me on my ass after I snapped at the way she was treating me.
Don't be swayed by her words, your both still in the whirlwind of post breakup emotions. Ignore her friends, that's just what they do.
