I spent my teenage years fantasising about a boyfriend but I couldn't get one. Now I'm in my mid twenties and finally found one, but it's just not what I wanted all those years, I wanted to be young girl in a passionate relationship with a young boy, instead I'm just a woman in a relationship with some guy who's over all of that teenage stuff.
I can never be a teenage girl with a boyfriend, how do I accept what I can get?
>>16949009
what do you think would have been different if you had been in the same relationship 10 years ago?
Just because you "can" get a boyfriend doesn't mean you "should." Being in a relationship with someone you don't feel strongly about is very unfulfilling. I don't see how the hell you managed to go through your teenage years without ever finding anyone, but the fact that you did doesn't necessarily mean you won't be able to find passionate romance as an adult. Wasting time on someone you don't feel that way for certainly won't help.
>>16949021
We would both be teenagers with heightened emotions due to hormones, we could do all the teenage relationship shit, I would have happy memories of being a young girl.
>>16949024
Passionate romance as an adult is no substitute for what I missed out on as a young girl.
>>16949058
>Passionate romance as an adult is no substitute for what I missed out on as a young girl.
If that's how you feel, then you might as well stop now, because you're retarded.
sage.
>>16949058
Get over it. Some "young girls" get raped and traumatized, some teenage romances end up in unwanted pregnancy, career plans cut short, lifelong resentment. Most teenagers don't know how to be "passionately romantic," so a lot of these early relationships end in heartbreak or disappointment that can affect your attitude in all future relationships.
You dodged it all. You have a clean slate. Lots of girls would trade in ALL their youthful "passion" to have a clean slate again. Stop complaining.
>>16949064
Why exactly am I retarded.
>>16949069
How the fuck do I have a clean slate? I got my heart broken by guys who didn't return my feelings, I was abused, and my depression fucked up my career plans
They got to practice how to be in relationships, they get to have memories from their youth, I have none of that.
>>16949071
It annoys me that I even have to spell this out for you. Being a teenager and falling in love is not some magical experience that is somehow different compared to how it is when you're an adult. The fact that you think your age matters indicates that the issue here isn't that you want a "passionate relationship," but rather the issue is that you want to experience some idealized version of one that you have in your head. It's bullshit that you made up because you just want something to complain about.
>>16949088
So what do you want me to tell you? I've got a time machine so you can be a teenager again? Stop dwelling on the past, and focus on making the present & future as good as you possibly can. Or are you just here to bitch about things that none of us can possibly change or help you with? I think you're looking for /r9k/
>How do I accept
What is it with this phrase in /adv/? It's so retarded. It's like you picked the soup instead of the salad at a restaurant and then you ask the waiter, "How do I accept that I won't have the salad?" There's no instruction manual on feeling things. You either feel what you know you should feel or you recognize that you're retarded. But then I'm sure you'll be here asking how you accept that you're a retard. If you aren't feeling the way you know you should, you don't need advice. You need an appointment with a shrink.
>>16949009
Relationships when you are in your 20s are not the same as when you are a teen. Don't even try to compare the two, you will lose your ever loving mind.
>>16949098
I asked for advice on how to accept what I can get. "get over it" doesn't tell me how I can get over it.
>>16949088
Sounds like teenage years to me except that I didn't let depression fuck with my career plans. Maybe you should just man up.
Also this >>16949091
>>16949105
>Relationships when you are in your 20s are not the same as when you are a teen
I know, that's why I'm depressed.
>>16949111
There were no relationships in my teenage years, doesn't sound like teenage years to me.
>>16949104
I didn't get to choose between the soup and the salad, anon. I'm stuck with the soup and now I'm trying to learn how to like it.
>>16949116
Feel so different then if you really want to.
>>16949109
What I'm trying to tell you is that what you've got right now sounds pretty good, and REAL. The stuff you think you missed out on, that's all a fantasy. Yes, some people have great relationships that make them happy when they're very young. But that's VERY rare. Much more common is confusion, heartbreak, mistreatment, awkwardness and inexperience. I dated and had sex in high school and college, but I didn't have a GOOD relationship until I was 25. You didn't miss much.
So don't sabotage something real, something positive, because it isn't "as good" as an artificial, impossible fantasy you've got in your mind.
>>16949058
>heightened emotions due to hormones
No. You still have the hormonal capability to feel virtually the same emotional experience.
What's different is you both have perspective and common sense that you didn't have so you aren't acting and feeling like absolute retards like teens do.
I'm 99% sure what you are really after is the experience of being an idiot in love. If that's what you're pining for, I can't help you.
I think what you are describing crops up in many ways for every person on earth.
Best conversation in my alanon family group: lady in her 60s says she suddenly realised all she's going on and on and on about is having the perfect childhood--epiphany--that ship sailed and isn't turning around.
We adjust. We adapt. We get sad thinking about it. Let yourself have a few minutes or even and hour of boo-hoo-I'm sad. Then you shrug it off and spend an equal amount of time focusing on the good.
Also, stop romanticising what you didn't have. I wouldn't trade the love of my life, found when I was 31, for living my life and becoming me all those years without him.
>>16949122
>I'm stuck with the soup and now I'm trying to learn how to like it.
Wow, if I was your boyfriend and I found this thread, it'd be fucking over in a heartbeat.
Do you even really like him? Maybe the problem isn't that "adult relationships are no good," maybe the problem is that you conned your way into a relationship you don't even want, just so you don't have to spend time alone
>>16949125
What I have is not what I want. What's positive about it? He's over all of that young love stuff he wants a serious adult relationship.
I'm so jealous of you. I feel inferior to you.
>>16949129
Thanks for the helpful advice.
>>16949122
Fine, the restaurant was out of salad. Do you still not recognize how retarded the question is?
>I'm sorry madame, we're out of the salad for this evening.
>Well I guess I'll have to have the soup then.
>Very good, madame.
>But tell me garcon, how do I accept the soup? How do I come to terms with not having been able to pick the salad? HOW DO I FEEL?
>...
If you saw someone acting like that in public, you'd probably call for the men with the nets and white suits. It's such an absurd line of questioning. You're talking about spontaneous emotions and the process of closure as though it's a deliberate set of decisions.
>>16949132
I'm not talking about him, I'm talking about being stuck with adult relationships rather than young love.
>>16949140
Then break up with him. He deserves better than some whiny woman who doesn't even want to be with him. If you don't see anything positive about it, just fuck off and let him move on, and keep looking for something you actually want
OP is a retard. Abandon thread.
>>16949141
I hate soup.
>>16949145
>I'm not talking about him, I'm talking about being stuck with adult relationships rather than young love.
Maybe find a young kid to fuck?
>>16949147
>and keep looking for something you actually want
What I want is impossible for me to have.
>>16949145
You ARE talking about him. You don't have an "adult relationship," you have a relationship with another individual human being. He's not just "adult man #35832."
You really can't see beyond yourself, can you? There's only what YOU want, you haven't even talked about him like he's a real person. Just "boyfriend that isn't good enough because I'm convinced children are better lovers"
>>16949152
How would that help, I'm not a young girl anymore, it wouldn't be the same.
>>16949150
Then don't eat it. No one's making you order the damn soup.
>>16949159
this thread is too fucking stupid for me, I'm done
>>16949161
Then I'd be hungry and sad. It's not a solution to my unhappiness.
>>16949156
Then stop whining about it. There's no magical "Acceptance" button. There's no advice anyone can give you. You have to move on and stop whining about whatever stupid problem you think you have.
>>16949150
So then don't eat it. Or eat it anyway because your hunger is more important than your hatred. Or do something else entirely. The point is that you'd have to be retarded to not string together
situation>assessment>action
which is all that acceptance is. It's perfectly normal to want closure on a situation but it's utterly nonsensical to ask how it can be achieved, especially in one particular way.
>>16949009
teenage relationships are all hype. They don't live up to the expectation. The sex isn't great as both of you are not experienced. You have limited money and limited freedom.
>>16949157
He's not exactly enthusiastic about me either, anon.
There are some good things about dating late. More guys will have experience and not make the blunders that an inexperienced teen might make. For example, it could happen that your first kiss is perfect and not a slobbery mess thanks to this. It's difficult to judge based on the information, but maybe your current bf isn't the right guy for you. There's that saying, "you make me feel like a teen again," and it could happen to you. Looking at the bright side is helpful for getting over regrets. It's exciting in a way that you have this whole unexplored world open to you after waiting so long. It's also possible to find guys that feel everything is very new with you even though they've had other relationships, and who will fulfill your secret hopes without you having to ask.
>>16949177
then why the fuck are you together?
He's probably "not enthusiastic" because you're an irrational bitch who treats him like a constant disappointment over things neither of you can control. Christ, I've been talking to you ten minutes and I'm already at the end of my rope
>>16949159
Nothing will help, because you're not a young girl. Might as well just give my idea to fuck a young boy a shot on the offchance that his semen will cause reverse aging in you.
>>16949183
>then why the fuck are you together?
It's this or nothing..
I don't talk to him about any of this, I would just annoy him.
>>16949182
My first kiss was when I was 11, with an adult, it was disgusting.
> It's exciting in a way that you have this whole unexplored world open to you
The world I wanted to explore is gone.
>getting over regrets
I don't have regrets, because I didn't have a choice to regret.
You know I think I just realized what the problem is here.
OP have you ever actually experienced helplessness before? Is this concept entirely new to you? Maybe I'm just taking for granted here the experience of having to endure something negative without any power to actually change it. That sort of thing forces you to learn acceptance because there's nothing you can do to either change it or avoid having to keep living with the reality of it.
Have you somehow made it all the way to adulthood without ever facing tragedy?
>>16949198
This might be it. This does sound a little bit like "waah why can't everything just be perfect??" syndrome
>>16949198
There are things in my life that have gone wrong because they were out of my control, I suppose they don't bother me as much as this does.
I don't have family or close friends to lose, or any significant property.
I guess I could lose my health to the point where I would miss out on experiences, that would probably fuck me up.
>>16949240
If this is the most significant tragedy you've ever confronted, I think my guess hit the mark. Oh dear. I don't even know how something like that gets handled.
what you want is drama
fact.
and now that youre not a dumb little bitch and the guy knows better than to fuck around with dumb bitches. drama just isnt as common
sorry you missed out on all the stupid dumb bitch shit as a kid. im sure youll get over it or just end up killing yourself
>>16949167
>>16949177
>>16949196
>It's this or nothing..
This is your problem. It's not because you aren't a young girl. It's because you are forcing yourself into a relationship you don't like out of fear and desperation. Kids are capable of that too, you know.
That's your problem, and the obvious solution is to man up, nancy, stop making dumb fear-based decisions.
>>16949255
No, I mean it's adult relationships or nothing, not him or nothing.
>>16949269
I feel like I'm talking to a person with no grasp on reality. Nobody here can help you, because you do not have a real problem. There's really nothing else to be said here.
>>16949269
YOU LACK DRAMA YOU STUPID SLUT
seriously. go fuck off. youre probably an ugly bitch since no one wanted to tap that in highschool
DO YOU KNOW HOW HORNY GUYS ARE IN HIGHSCHOOL? i used to walk around with a boner from class to class just checking out teenage ass
youre probably ugly. you sound dumb as fuck. you lack excitement which is probably cause youre a boring loser yourself
YOURE BORED? DO SOMETHING FUN
>>16949297
I obviously have a real problem because I'm miserable, I cry myself to sleep most days. I need help accepting my reality.
>>16949009
Does your name start with a K? Are you in the UK?
You have absolutely no fucking issue. Stop being a cunt.
>>16949300
>seriously. go fuck off. youre probably an ugly bitch since no one wanted to tap that in highschool
>DO YOU KNOW HOW HORNY GUYS ARE IN HIGHSCHOOL? i used to walk around with a boner from class to class just checking out teenage ass
Exactly, my self esteem has never recovered from being rejected by desperate teenage boys
I'm such an ugly subhuman piece of shit. Leftovers that no one really wants. That's part of the reason why my boyfriend isn't that into me.
>>16949300
>DO YOU KNOW HOW HORNY GUYS ARE IN HIGHSCHOOL?
I wish I was still as horny as I was in high school.
Now I just sit around wishing that I felt like fapping.
>>16949314
GOOD. great. were getting somewhere
the root of the problem is youre probably ugly and not as good as the other little sluts running around. here's a thought
ever go to the gym?
>but i walk on the threadmill at leas..
no
go on a diet. start actually working out. pick up a hobby. learn a joke or two
fix your shit or die being exactly the same as you as
IF YOU DONT FOLLOW THIS YOURE JUST GUNNA BE BITCHING AND BITCHING TO ALL SORTS OF LOSERS TILL YOU FINALLY DIE FAT AND OLD
your call not my problem lol
>>16949327
I'm not fat I lift weights and I've always been slim
I'm just an ugly piece of shit that no one wanted.
>>16949302
Op you've been given a lot of great advice in this thread. You've shot down all of it. I'm in the same situation as you and I found the posts helpful. Can you try rereading the advice and giving it a chance before dismissing it? You're going to attract people similar to your level. If you're stuck in negative and defeatist mindset, that limits the type of bf you can get. You could try therapy to feel better about your situation, which would make you a happier person and attract more people.
>>16949338
What advice did I dismiss that was helpful? It all seems irrational to me.
OP suffers from a severe case of Fear Of Missing Out.
>>16949398
The nightmare of missing out has come true in my case.
>>16949341
>It all seems irrational to me.
You ever hear about the guy driving to work, and his wife calls him and says "Honey be careful, I'm watching the news and some crazy guy is driving on I-95 in the wrong direction! Watch out!"
her husband says, "ONE crazy person?? I'm on I-95 right now, and EVERYONE'S driving in the wrong direction!"
>>16949302
>tfw no highschool gf
I guess the only solution is that we both hangout and have sex in a highschool gym ;) ;)
also this thread is fake and gay
>>16949406
What's irrational about what I've been saying.
>>16949091
Yup this! life ain't always peachy but if you do find some sort or any kind of love count your self lucky some people never get to see the world
>>16949468
> some people never get to see the world
Those people literally don't exist, what are you talking about.
>>16949009
You're romanticising teen romances. They're awkward, they rarely last long and both people make a load of mistakes. Mid 20s are probably when relationships are most interesting. You're still young enough to be fun but also a lot more sure of yourself too.
I was in the same situation as OP and I wound up
1. Throwing myself at anyone that paid attention to me, getting in progressively worse relationships as a result. After a while decent guys could tell something was wrong and stayed away, leaving only scumbags and predators. I was degraded, humiliated, and raped by an ex boyfriend that knew what kind of unhappiness and loneliness to look for a woman.
2. Developing body dysmorphic disorder (google) and nearly killing myself five years ago.
If you can't get past it on your own please, please get help. I'm married and incredibly happy now. things can change and get better.
>>16949485
People who got to have relationships when they were teens are more sure of themselves in their mid twenties because they've had experience.
I haven't had any of the experience. Also they sure don't seem anywhere near as fun.
>>16949487
I get suicidal a couple of times a year.
I'm so sick of therapists but I don't even have access to them anymore because the NHS only provide you with 3 months worth of therapy.
You just gotta learn to let that shit go. No use in crying over split milk as they say. Live in the now. Getting too caught up in "what could have been" is a very dangerous road to travel. It can really fuck with you mentally and you'll never be happy. You have to let yourself be happy as stupid as that sounds. Just do it.
>>16949104
LOl
>>16949492
>People who got to have relationships when they were teens are more sure of themselves in their mid twenties because they've had experience.
When I said more sure of yourself I wasnt speaking romantically as such. People in their 20s have had more life experience than their teenaged selves.
>Also they sure don't seem anywhere near as fun.
This is purely a grass is greener type mindset. It's also not helping you at all. The more you obsess over "missing out" on teen relationships the worse you'll feel
>>16949009
im in the same boat with my bf.. just sex and movies.. theres no adrenaline, risks, honesty, passion, exploring nature, food fights, none of that. being 20 sucks.
Since the thread is gone to shit, anyone have sauce on that ass???
>>16949525
You sound like a boring person
>>16949521
I'm in my mid twenties and I haven't had big life experiences like RELATIONSHIPS in order to grow as a person.
I'm no surer of myself than when I was 16.
>It's also not helping you at all.
But it's true. If it wasn't true than I could stop thinking it, but I can't delude myself.
>>16949529
No i have so many ideas of what to do with guys i like but they complain theyre too tired and just end up having sex
>>16949530
Firstly you need to understand that teen relationships are not as idealised as you think they are. Just like any other relationship they have boring moments, passionate, fun moments and fights.
Secondly relationships aren't an effortless thing, if you want passionate fun and spontaneous behaviour then you'd better be prepared to put the effort in to make those things happen.
Finally you need to understand that making yourself feel like shit because you missed out on something accomplishes nothing, it wont somehow turn back time and give you a second chance. Stop beating yourself up and stop hyping teen relationships to an unrealistic level.
>>16949564
At the end of the day we'll still be adults there's a limit to how much fun and what kind of fun you can have.
I don't know how to stop feeling like shit about it. I can't change it and I can't find a way to accept it. It's just shit.
>>16949670
1. Teenagers are not inherently happier than adults nor do they have more fun than adults. When I was a teenager I had a pretty unpleasant time of it and was generally miserable, adult life on the other hand has been great.
2. Relationships are not a magical fix all.
3. Find something in your daily life you can be proud of, doesn't have to be a big thing just something that you're proud of. If you dont have anything then either start a personal project that you might be interested in or join a club that aligns with your interests. This'll keep you grounded in the present rather than looking back with rose tinted glasses.
I don't have anything else to add really. We cant magically fix your problems, you have to be the one to do the heavy lifting there and honestly I get the impression you don't want to fix your problems as you've argued and discarded pretty much everything that's been said. I'd suggest looking back at the advice given in this thread and follow some of it. Stop making excuses. Stop obsessing over teen relationships.
>>16949725
Could you pick out the best advice in this thread I could follow?
>>16949728
Ideally you'd need to find what works best and seems the most appealing for you but I'll tell you what worked best for me. Joining a club was what turned my life from miserable to happy.
I initially joined the tabletop game society (Board games, RPGs etc) at my university and had an absolute blast and met a lot of cool people. When I graduated I went looking for my local equivalent and things have been a lot of fun since then. Obliviously if you're not into gaming then you'd need to find something that works for you
>>16949773
I have hobbies already though, I'm a member of a few societies and I've got a bit compsci project to work on.
>>16949777
Well as I said, what worked for me might not work for you. Ultimately this is something you have to be the driving force of. All I can say is maintain a positive attitude and maybe think twice about some of the things that you've discarded. Talk to close friends about it or a counsellor. Just make sure you take an active step towards getting better.
>>16949807
What have I discarded? What kind of thoughts would be positive yet not delusional?
>>16949818
>What have I discarded?
Just read through the advice you've been given throughout the thread.
>positive yet not delusional?
Focus on the good that happens during your day rather than the negative. Focus on things you like about yourself rather than the things you dislike.
>>16949831
>Just read through the advice you've been given throughout the thread.
But I have.
Still don't know what I've discarded
Not much negative happens throughout the day. And things that happen now don't make up for things I don't have.
The fact that I have nice eyes doesn't mean I should feel ok about having saggy tits. It just doesn't work that way.
>>16949406
>You ever hear about the
Not her, but I have now.
>>16949838
Are tits important in a relationship?
>>16949838
>The fact that I have nice eyes doesn't mean I should feel ok about having saggy tits. It just doesn't work that way.
Less of this
>I have nice eyes
More of this
>>16949847
I have nice eyes, so what? I still feel shit about my tits. It doesn't make up for having shit tits.
Do you see how negative things don't magically go away?
>>16949860
You're reinforcing the negatives
>>16949112
Is this the only reason why you're depressed?
>>16949865
I'm not, I just can't get rid of them just because there are positive things.
>>16949009
>>16949058
I'm 21 and never had a gf either, so....I am gonna be like you, I think.
>>16949064
>>16949091
It looks like YOU are retarder, not her.
When you're a teen, I think it's different due to you growing, hormones, being innocent, etc.
Does it matter? Even if you'd had some nice things happen in your teens, they would be over now, and you'd be in the same place. Gotta move forward not backward my guy.
>>16950227
I wouldn't be in the same place really, I would have had experiences to have memories of.
>>16949091
Listen to this anon. He already wrote out all of what I was about to spew to you.
>>16949105
Also my first relationship was with 18. And I don't care. Before I was even disgusted by all that teenage relationship crap all my friends always had.
>>16949009
>>16949867
This, OP.
I totally get it. I'm so depressed over it all the time desu.
I'm a guy but it's the same thing OP. Nothing anyone said itt was any comfort.
You can say all teenage love was awkward and terrible but at the end of the day people reminisce about that shit all the time. People are always telling stories about their first love, first kiss, first fuck. Yeah it might have been terrible but it was still "the time of your life" *violins*
Yeah I could get a girlfriend tomorrow - and I'd be a decade behind. I'm 25. Mid-20s women don't even like guys they just want a wallet that will give them 2 kids and who they can divorce later. My first kiss will be sloppy and awkward but it will be on lips that have sucked a dozen cocks and she'll be freaked out that I lost 10 years. Embarrassing nervous first sex would be better if she was also young, embarrassed and nervous but she won't be, she'll have had a million cocks and judge me and tell her friends.
Of course the first everything won't be any good. But if it's also no good for the other person who's equally inexperienced it's learning and fun. At this age it's just "what the fuck is wrong with you".
Can't get those years back. Wasted it and it's gone. A lot of people feel this way why do you think every guy is into miniskirts and panties and stuff.
>lets go all the way tonight no regrets just love
I'll never fucking have that. I'll be genuinely in love with someone for the first time and she'll be going through the motions, looking for another guy the minute she learns I'm basically a child.
Seriously this thread is making my cry OP
>>16950935
just be yourself and everything will be daijoubou!!!
>>16949009
I'm in the same boat. I never had a boyfriend in high school and wish I did. Although I think we're romanticizing it a bit since crazy hormones and drama in the teens years aren't all that fun. But even then, I do wish I had the experience.
>>16950981
>crazy hormones and drama in the teens years aren't all that fun
I mean why would the media idealize it if it wasn't at least kind of good
Everyone looks back on it fondly. You'll never hear adults going "man all these years later I still hate my first time", it's "you never forget your first <3_<3
>>16951041
That's because degenerates talk loudly about private matters.
Children shouldn't be having sex.
Date me, I'm a teenager and we can do a bunch of teenage stuff
We can get ice cream together, kiss on the hood of my car and keep kissing until drool starts coming out, have sex in the back of my car, talk on the phone for hours and say I love you every night, hide our relationship from our parents, the works
Easy fix - start fucking teenagers.
>>16951063
>>16951086
I'm not a teenager so it wouldn't be the same.
>>16951092
Is this the only thing that's bothering you?
>>16951096
No, why?
>>16951129
You ought to talk about those things instead, if you want adequate responses, because this thread is going in circles with the same kind of responses, as threads on /adv/ are prone to.
>>16949009
Is that your ass?
OP, you clearly hate yourself and your life.
I've given advice to many girls like you before. Each and every one of you don't know how to value yourself and over value everything else. Flip it around. Find what makes you special and learn to show it. Everyone else isn't that great either, the trick is to find what few things they are good at and work with it to make them feel good. Adopt a positive attitude, fake it if you have to. That will help attract the right kind of people, a person who looks happy and makes others happy is a social magnet. Dump your boyfriend, the fuck are you even thinking staying in a relationship like that? Don't try to get into another one till you can at least fake being happy all the time.
Your rosy image of teen relationships is a lie. You seem to not even know what a relationship is for, it's like your whole base of knowledge comes from watching those shitty high school drama's. Find someone who fulfills your needs, don't ever accept a person who abuses you emotionally or can't fuck you as well as you want. The ideal match would share your life goals. You don't need any experience to find someone who meets all those requirements, especially since you're a girl.
>>16951274
Oh and, we've all been hurt before. The best relationships require both sides to open up and build trust. Don't ruin what could be the love of your life by always hiding behind a wall built by the assholes you've encountered in your life. You're keeping out the one who could potentially make you feel better than you ever have before and shorting yourself on the fun parts of the relationship. It's an investment with a risk but the pay off is unlike anything else in this world. Complete trust and comfort between two people takes away much of the pain life brings and helps you achieve more than you ever could alone.
This is coming from the a guy who didn't have teenage relationships and is now in his mid-20's, living life with a girl who I thought couldn't exist. Don't settle and don't give up, you'll find yours.
>>16949475
Read between the lines faggot, the meaning is figurative
Why dafuq this pic?
>>16951402
because butts
>>16949932
>retarder
>misusing a comma
lol, dumbass. Also,
>teenagers
>innocent
Where the fuck did you grow up?
Build a time machine, go back in time and delete this thread so that past me wouldn't have to read it.
>Wahhh boohooo I've never heard a nice teeny weeny little relationship with a boy to carry my books for me like in those Taylor Swift music videos
Are you a literal child? As someone who was in two long term relationships in my teens, they were pure nonsense and now I wish that I'd been single that entire time because it was a giant waste of time.
People at that age are immature little knobs and the things you're worried about as a couple are petty stuff like, "Oh no he didn't text me back fast enough" "Should I text good morning first?" It's pathetic how people romanticize "young love" I guess some schmucks love to brag about having a high school sweetheart but all those things did was turn me into a cynical and bitter old fart and I'm not even 25 yet.
Grow up. Literally.
>>16949064
This guy has it right. You are retarded for being so blind to your current situation. You will never have emotions due to "heightened hormones" or do "teenage relationship shit." And honestly, if that's what you are most concerned about as a young adult the you are immature, irresponsible, and retarded. You should be less focused on stupid nostalgic ideals and more focused on developing your current life either with your current partner or individually. Just everything about your nostalgic ideas are shallow and imply you are not mature enough for a romantic relationship .
>>16949302
You seem pretty aware of what's going on.
Just work with what you have. If you just get hung up with what you don't have, of course you're gonna make yourself goddamn miserable.
Rather, the question is what can you do to make the current situation better? Because, getting set on some impossible fantasy will help you none.
Even if you get the infatuation you so desperately seek, it will suck again when it inevitably fades away.
You just want to escape your shitty situation instead of making it better.
Let me save you a lot of heartache, and tell you, you just need to improve whatever sucks in your life. Talk to a therapist, or elaborate on your present situation in another thread cause this one went to shit.
All this self hatred. Jesus OP. You've tricked yourself into thinking if you were a teenage in love it would make everything better.
Your shit relationship is what you make it. It's shit because you make it shit. You can't go back in time, stop bitching and realise that. Your relationship can be as good as whatever fairytale you've imagined in your mind, but not with your current attitude.
And people wonder why women get treated like children.
Maybe this will help you, OP.
Thank you based Tolle
https://youtu.be/cCln5aAb8GA
>>16949058
If this isn't bait you are delusional
You are in your mid twenties make these years count
Ungrateful
>>16949009
I don't browse /adv/ but visit like once a month but this thread has definitely been made before
I can only hope it's trolling and it's not really the same moron making the same thread because they're so mentally stuck on imaginary bullshit
>>16949333
"I'm just an ugly piece of shit. Nobody wants me. I want to feel like a teenage girl, anon. Someone spit on me!"
Gettin that sad girl erection, boys
>>16949091
This makes absolute sense to me. Im an exact similar situation as OP and it was helpful.
>>16949322
Are you me ?
>>16949333
Even fat chicks get D. Theres now way no one liked. Are you that ugly ?
>>16949009
>why isn't my life twilight?
>I'm special and I deserve a special boy!
Get over yourself.
>>16949009
I used to feel the same way. I'm going on 21 and have still never had a girlfriend but I used to stress over how much I feel I've missed out on in various social avenues. I have no fond memories for most of my life and I'll never get to experience these things that seem so normal for everyone else to have experienced.
I made my first friend at age 19. I'm not even concerned with finding a girl. I've never really tried. But if it's anything like my attempts at just finding friends then it won't go do well.
I don't really know how to get over those feelings OP. I constantly feel like I've missed out on a lot.
>>16949009
I want to tongue that ass.
I feel similar to OP. I just want to go back in time to my childhood. None of the responses in this thread help because DESU I already know I'm looking at the past through rose-tinted glasses and I just need to move on. I just can't fucking do it.
I don't feel miserable most of the time or anything but sometimes I'll be lying in bed and will just start weeping. FML.
>>16952155
Holy fucking shit why did Japanese moot turn T-B-H into desu?
>>16950935
;-; all my feels
>>16950935
Well, now I'm just miserable (More than I already was).
Thanks, now I'm considering drinking to blackness.
>>16949009
there's absolutely nothing about teenage love you can't have right now. hell you can even dress up like one if you like!
I'm 24, having my first actual gf and i'm her first actual love and we're going trough all the sugary sweet stuff teenagers do. like holding hands, making that little jump when i see her, we even hit a plaayground once when we were a little boozed up at night and joked about getting those heart pendant necklace thingies.
what i think is going on is that you're not really mad in love with this guy but more dealing with it cuz he's what you have and blaming the lack of feels on the age thing. I've been there too, trying to stick with someone you don't really love because you think that's how it's supposed to feel.
>>16951310
>This is coming from the a guy who didn't have teenage relationships and is now in his mid-20's, living life with a girl who I thought couldn't exist. Don't settle and don't give up, you'll find you
EXACTLY my situation.
>>16950935
>You can say all teenage love was awkward and terrible but at the end of the day people reminisce about that shit all the time. People are always telling stories about their first love, first kiss, first fuck. Yeah it might have been terrible but it was still "the time of your life" *violins*
we only remember and talk about the good stuff. Especially the latter, people aren't going to throw their problems on the table, they just talk about the good stuff, even though it wasn't.
same as when you ask someone "how'r u doing" do you expect them to honestly say "bad, i'm so insecure about this and that"?
> looking for another guy the minute she learns I'm basically a child.
>But if it's also no good for the other person who's equally inexperienced it's learning and fun. At this age it's just "what the fuck is wrong with you".
a lot of people are judgemental assholes, but if anything, more mature women (>25) are more understanding than younger ones.
>>16950935
PLEASE.
PEOPLE.
This post guys...
>they just want a wallet who they can divorce later
Redpill. Assuming all women are shallow vapid cunts.
>dozen cocks
Redpill.... Slut shaming... insecurity over former sexual partners... let's move on.
>million cocks and judge me and tell her friends
Redpill and paranoia over bullshit, this next to never happens. If it does, that person is a cunt, and cunts exist.
>what the fuck is wrong with you
Redpill assuming all women are cunts.
>wasted it and it's gone
IT'S GONE, BUT YOU DWELL ON IT, YOU NIGGER. MOVE ON AND DO WHAT EREN SAID. FIGHT
>looking for another guy the minute she learns I'm basically a child
If you're an actual manchild, then yes. If you mean your virginity is why you're 'basically a child', then it's not likely.
I suggest you seek therapy to change these thinking patterns.
>>16952387
The amount of time you said redpill is staggering, this isn't the matrix. You should seek therepy if you can't differentiate a movie from real life.
>>16949009
You grow the fuck up and realise life isn't a romance novel. Wow that totally needed 100+ replies.
have a fuckin cry cunt
mid twenties and only just found a boyfriend? the writing is on the wall
>>16949069
Yes and some people starve in Africa
OP's got some massive phantom nostalgia issues they need to get counselled out of, but that reasoning is bullshit.
>>16949140
>What I have is not what I want. What's positive about it? He's over all of that young love stuff he wants a serious adult relationship.
I dunno OP, I feel like this serious adult relationship you're experiencing is actually a really boring adult relationship instead.
I think you two need to go out, do some crazy travel tour, do couple sky dive or go camping or something like that. Two teens have those emotional highs because simultaneously they're at a challenging point of their life. That's why I think a wild holiday sounds just what you need.
>>16950935
true ;(
I wish I could be a cute white teenage girl
>>16949064
this
>If you mean your virginity is why you're 'basically a child', then it's not likely.
>a lot of people are judgemental assholes, but if anything, more mature women (>25) are more understanding than younger ones.
not really
They say on 4chan they don't care but IRL it's unacceptable.
Don't expect meaning or fulfillment in your life. Ever. That goes for everyone - one of the biggest sources of misery in the developed world is expecting some undefinable magic quality in your life. If your life isn't shit, you're doing pretty well.
And yeah, there's no step by step process to accepting things. You just have to hear them over and over until it clicks.
>>16953655
>OKCupid
>representative of anything but a small minority of jaded lardsters of both sexes
>>16949009
Break in a virgin.
i'm a guy but i feel your feels. in my case its even worse because my gf is 4 years older an all she want is for me to get a job and then get a better job. job, job, job. i dont even want to have a job anymore. it sucks because i know what she did when she was young. she was a free spirit, a slut, a party girl, alll the things she isn't now
>>16949009
Just go on OKC and flirt with teenagers.
If you really want that fantasy to become true.
Problem solved.
There's no guarantee it will last though because teenage relationshits last for about 2 days to 3 weeks. But you can at least slowly forget about your fantasy twilight relationship the more you date teenagers and see what a waste of time they really are.
>>16952537
>implying Redpill online has anything to do with the movie other than sharing the name and vague idea
>implying it's not easier to type "Red Pill" than it is to describe what it is: an awareness of the differences between men and women, an awareness of modern feminism and how it affects society, and awareness of female sexual "strategy" and what they look for in a man
>>16949009
All I know is that that ass is making my mouth water.
>>16953988
>Just go on OKC and flirt with teenagers.
no need to send op to prison
>>16949058
>We would both be teenagers with heightened emotions due to hormones
I'm 24 and I'm still as super-horny as I was when I was 14-18, I usually jerk off two-three times a day. Maybe that's just me, though.
>>16949009
I wanted to win a massive prize and experience my early adulthood as a rich dillatante who never had to go to a soul crushing occupation or work for assholes in order to pay for school and eat.
But life didn't work out that way. Quit complaining about the life you wish you had amd pay attention to the one you've got, before you miss out on it.
>>16954115
Enjoy your ruined dick and inability to enjoy sex.
>>16954128
Oh, no, I didn't think about that. I knew about hairy palms or go blind, but there's that, too?!?!
Thanks, Mom.
>>16949198
Not OP, but the hardships I faced weren't that bad to me beyond being poor. I miss the same things OP does, and I want to go back to being a hopeful teenaged retard instead of a cynical lazy cunt. I was completely sheltered and bailed out of dangerous situations. I have no clue what a real irreversible struggle would be like and I think I'll kill myself if I found out. tl;dr where 2 cop shrink
