I'm going to greentext the background info to make it easier
>recently meet girl
>me boring guy not much sexual experience
>her now sober reformed alcoholic slut
>me ok with this
>her wanting to get into bondage and wants me into it too
>not sure where to start or how to be this guy
tl;dr how to I turn myself into someone that is good at bondage and bdsm?
>>16939756
Well, you missed to most important part:
Who is she? Sub or Dom? Because if she is dom, all you need to know is safe word. Like when it all goes in bad way you yell it to make it all stop, unless you are gagged :-D
If she is sub, then I don't see how it can work without you first developing some mentality first.
>>16939768
she is sub and says she is newish to this and never trusted anyone enough to be open to this life style. I am having hard time being the dom, more or less controlling her to my will is outside my comfort zone at the moment
bump?
>>16939768
You need to know the difference between:
>bondage
Immobilizing your partner mostly by various methods. Doesn't have to do anything with dom/sub mentality.
>BDSM
variety of erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other interpersonal dynamics.
>dom/sub in bed
You slap her butt and order 1 blowjob while calling her slut.
>dom/sub in everywhere (aka life style)
You slap her butt, order 1 blowjob and after you slap her again and order her to make sandwich (aka ideal woman .-)
See how much things it can be? Everybody except different things and you need to consult it with her.
>is outside my comfort zone
Yea that means you need to take it slow or don't even try. Most people are actually subs. Further reading: fetlife, chastitymansion. Just go and make your homework.
