>Be me
>Greentexting like a faggot but can't express my feels any other way
>First time posting on 4chan and I think I need different people to listen to
>As I was saying: Be me
>Sophomore in Highschool now
>Go back to 1st grade
>Have assignment on what I want to be when I grow up
>Genuinely have no idea as a kid, put in a joke answer and get an F on it (the school grading was actually a 1/4, the system was fucking retarded, all grades were either 1,2,3, or 4, but I'm getting side tracked)
>Genuinely have no idea what I want to do as a grown up
>Fast forward to middleschool years
>I wanted to be a developer for AAA vidya
>Fascination with how vidya worked
>Told my pops what I wanted to be as a grown up, vidya designer
"Yeah, good luck with that, Anon, noone makes it in that field"
>Being 12 and more fucking retarded than an orgy on a shortbus, I want to prove him wrong
>Still did nothing with Vidya or looked into it, but still like the idea of how it worked
>Maybe fiddled with DooM 2 mods a bit, had no real idea what I was doing.
>Tell Ma and Pa all the cool things I learned through the power of you tube tutorials
>Still unimpressed
>Grow out of the vidya phase, I still question whether or not my feelings about being a devfag were real or just illusions
>Fast even more forward to the end of 8th grade
>Already expected to know what field of career we want to be in
"Why the fuck should I know what I want to go into college for 4 years prior?" -Young Anon
>Literally the counselors forced me to come up with something on the spot
>go with that old Vidya idea, at least it was familiar territory.
> Still carry that unknowingness of a future into freshman year
>Get an inkling at the end of freshman year
>I want to get into law
>Sophomore year rolls around, I now know what I should do
>Become a cop
>Research into it
>taking weightlifting class this year, a Criminal Justice class next year with advanced weight training
(1 / ?)
>Get all these cool ideas
>Tell parents
>Mom's fine with it
>Gives me the whole "Whatever you want, darling" speech
>Finally go up to dad, tell him what I want to be
>Not even given a chance to explain why
"Anon, you're not going to be a fucking cop, and that's it" - Anon's dadbro
>Why not?
>He lists off a bunchof bullshit from bullsit he watched on propaganda shit
"Police are murderers, and killers, and scum. They're taking our rights away, Anon, the law is just terrible. They're like the military and blah blah blah"
>Never thought of how my dad was such a propagandafag
>You could tell him some bullshit story about how Martians did 9/11 and he'd buy it
>Still have no idea what to do, still want to be a cop
>Know theres a difference between "Justice" and "muh justice"
>Tell dad's girlfriend (My ma and pa are split up)
"You don't want to be a cop, Anon, there are some that are terrible people, and they see terrible things"
>Uhh... yeah I get that
>She then basically tells me that cops eat like shit, and are lazy or fat
>She's a fitfag, which is ironic given her weight
>Know that pops and his girlfriend don't give a shit about what I'd want
>Keep telling me this stupid stuff on why cops are bad people
>I know that some are, but it's not necessarily the badge that's evil, it's the people wearing it
>Kind of that loud minority that get's the media's spotlight.
>Dad and his Lady obviously think I'm some sort of asshole because wanting to go into law
>They're always trying to pressure me into getting all A's and shit
>Tried to for the first quarter, got too strung up on it
>Became one of those gradefags that almost wept over a B-
>Grades dropped, rate of Nihilism increased
>Went from a 3.9 GPA to fucking 2.6
>I know I'd already be branded as a failure to pops if I hadn't shown them
>I want to say I don't care, but I obviously must
>Genuinely feel terrible thinking about it
(2 / 3)
What should I do, /adv/? I can't see any point in going for the highest grade since Pops already thinks I'm some cop-faggot. But looking back at how far I've fell, am I really redeemable at that point? I went from a fucking 3.9 to a 2.6. It's this constant feeling of "I can't care enough" and "I care too much". What should I do?
>>16889811
Your parents are people just like the people on this board. Do you think the people on this board know shit? some do, most don't. Kind of like parents. Most of them don't know shit about what's best for their children.
Your father and dad's fuck buddy (lol, and you're taking advice from him, the divorcee) don't know what's best for you and can't make that decision for you. If you want to be a cop, be a fucking cop. Just make damn sure that's what you want. Go meet some cops, ask if you can job shadow them. Go do some ride alongs. See what's up.
As far as your grades, stop blaming your parents. Your grades are your responsibility to improve; their opinion is irrelevant on this.
I think you should buckle down, get good grades, go follow cops around and see what's up, and then make a decision. But don't let your grades job over some daddy issue shit man.
