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ITT: Ask the opposite gender anything
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Before you post a question, check here to see if it's already been answered
Keep your questions short and sweet for more answers.
And please no derailing arguments.

Avoid asking these common questions:

>Do girls/guys like <insert specific look>?
Some do, some don't. Our answers are not going to help you.

>I'm shy and afraid of people/rejection. What do I do?
Think positive, and get over it by practising and exposing yourself to it.

>I like someone. What do I do?
Ask them out.

>How can I tell if someone likes me?
Ask them out.

>Where do I meet girls/guys?
Anywhere outside. Or online.

>Is my body part big/small enough?
>Am I short/tall enough?
Most likely

>Someone did something insignificant. What does it mean?
Nothing significant. Stop overthinking it.
Alternative answer: we don't fucking know.

>XYZ happened. Did I fuck it up with this guy/girl?
Maybe, maybe not. We're not in their head, we don't know. No amount of your walls of text will fix that.

>This person did something that hurt my feelings. Why do guys/girls do this?
Because shit people are shit people. It's not a gendered thing

>Would you date a virgin?
As long as they aren't insecure about it. Complexes are a total turn-off.

>Someone has made it abundantly clear they're no longer interested in me. Do I still have a chance?
No

>Where do I go on a first (or subsequent) date?
Pick one or more of the following: coffee, lunch, dinner, drinks, ice cream, movies, zoo, aquarium, museum, art gallery, <activity in your city>

>That one guy who keeps asking about cuddling in platonic friendships
No one wants to cuddle you. Stop asking

>Brandon and frog posters
Fuck off

>Pegasus
The one true god of /adv/
>>
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I'm moving away soon to get a fresh start
I really hate myself and think I should "fake it till I make it"
So I guess the question is what is confident behavior. My fear is that at any stress I'll crack and be back to my usual little bitch self, I want to stay consistent you know
>>
>>16845199
Confident behavior is believing that you are better than everyone around you and that no one can bring you down
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>>16845208
How do you act like that, or fake it even
>>
>>16845216
Just watch any movie with Samuel L. Jackson in it.
>>
Is a 26 year old guy hitting on or talking to 20 year old girls at college forbidden?
>>
>>16845297

Obviously. That's why they have a law in almost all countries that says it's legal to have sex with girls that are 16-18+, and why once you hit 25, there's another law that raises that to 24+.
>>
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Girls and fellow guys

I'm really embarrassed... so there is a girl who I really like. And she likes me a ton! Well.. She asked me for a body picture, and I had to ignore her request. I just hate hate HATE the way I look. I've been working out the past 1.5 months. And at first I thought I was making good progress, I physically felt better, and I thought I was doing good. I took this picture to send to her. But after seeing how shitty I look. I backed out. I know she wouldn't make fun or me, or it won't change her opinion of me. But I just hate how I look.

What do I do?? I work out about 3 times a week, but I still look like shit!!
>>
>>16845398
You're over fussing it. You look perfectly normal, but skinny. If you're so insecure, start working out. There is no other option for you. It's not like you're fat and can lose some weight.
alternatively, look on /fit/ for tips.
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>>16845364
>Obviously. That's why they have a law in almost all countries that says it's legal to have sex with girls that are 16-18+, and why once you hit 25, there's another law that raises that to 24+.

What?
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>>16845415
He's being sarcastic
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>>16845412

>start working out

I said I've been working out 3 times a week for the past 1.5 month.


But am I really over fussing? I'm not one of those people looking for attention or anything. But I honestly think I look bad. I've been targeting my chest, I think it is getting little bit bigger. But it just looks so "fatty". I'm a skinny guy, but have a fatty chest and it fucking drives me crazy. Fuck. I hate my shoulders and chest
>>
do straight girls like watching other girls swallow dicks/get fucked/etc?

i was with my fwb today and we were watching porn gifs from /r/nsfwgif (reddit) just to see if their was any interesting stuff we could try, and most of the stuff was 90% female on the screen which im not sure if she cared for or if girls like watching that type of stuff
>>
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>>16845445
This is the most degenerate thing I've ever read on /adv/
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>>16845437
Lose body fat...

Girls- Why do you only bother me for homework help, but never actually agree to study with me or anything?
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>>16845445

she probably isn't so much into the girl sucking the dick. But watching HOW the girl sucks the dick. Like she wants to be in that girls spot

Same with how when us guys watch porn. We don't focus on the dude. we just focus on what is happening, and try to copy what we see. To learn from it
>>
>>16845437
Working out 3 times a week doesn't mean shit if you don't do it correctly. Not to mention it's only been one month, more or less. You do look average, but the things you say when you talk about yourself leads me to believe you have some serious self-esteem issues, and it makes me wonder if you're even ready for a relationship with someone. Short tip; sperging out over your self-image is very unattractive.
Honestly, I think you've set your standards way too high, especially for 1 months of work only. Your chest isn't "fatty", but it isn't a body builders chest, or whatever you seem to think it should look like.
>>
>>16845451

>lose body fat

But in already skinny! I am a thin person. It's like I can't fucking win
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>>16845445
I do
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>>16845451
You are being used.
>>16845445
Depends on the girl.
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>>16845451
>Girls- Why do you only bother me for homework help, but never actually agree to study with me or anything?
You remind me of this guy from my old physics course. Him and some girl were technically dating, but she basically avoided him unless homework was due, or the take home exam was coming up.

She wasnt into him m8. Same with your situation
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>>16845451
Anon, ill study with you!
I've never had a guy offer to help me out or take me up on studying and having some food after
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>>16845492
Lol, he probably won't because he won't think you are pretty enough for the effort. If you're even a girl, that is
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>>16845454

I'm not looking for a body builder look. I know I'll never be "a big guy". But I at least want a shaped chest. I know my abs are starting to improve because I can feel them. Just I want my chest to be shaped, I don't care if it's big. I just hate how it looks like I have tits..
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>>16845530
Your chest looks fine, quit being so pathetic. You have a really fucked up image of yourself, and it's affecting how you see yourself in the mirror and images. There's nothing wrong with you chest. Now, take it to /fit/ if you need tips with chest muscle.
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>>16845550

>your chest looks fine

Really?
>>
When did you first start masturbating?

Please state gender.

I was 14 & am F
>>
>>16845589
13, Battlestar
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>>16845589

17 male
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>>16845596
>17

What are you, Amish? I was already cranking it to Cinemax while downloading porn on bearshare at 13
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>>16845589
Female

Since before I can remember. Maybe 4 or so.
>>
>>16845607
You slut, I bet you were raped or want to be
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>>16845597

No lol.

It's a long story..
>>
>>16845589
12 M.
>>
Do women enjoy being grinded against. I do this every time I make out with a girl when Im laying on top. But I dont notice it until Im hardcore dry humping her. Its weird to me when I notice but since she doesnt complain I just keep going.
>>
>>16845492
Try chatting people up in your major. I made some friends in my first physics course and I have a number of friends I frequently study with.

On the flipside I don't see why I'd ever want to study with someone taking fundamentally different classes.
>>
>>16845656
I like it
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>>16845364
Im not talking about legally, but socially. Does it make you a creepy old man?
>>
Anyone have any advice/experiences dating someone from a conservative Muslim family?

Her family is conservative, but she's pretty open to a lot of things including dating me (Asian guy). So far we've pretty much been dating in secret, she's not comfortable with any pictures of us on Facebook and stuff because of her parents/relatives etc. who might see and get mad.

It really feels like I'm getting into a whole different world with her, it's interesting to say the least.
>>
For the ladies.
Started dating a high school acquaintance out of nowhere.
She had broken up with her ex about 4 months prior. At the start she told me she wasn't sure what she wanted. She also said she wanted a break from the boyfriend ordeal, but was interested in me. Decided to try it out to see what comes of it. We even had sex. Talk to her about our relationship and she says she likes me. Things going good so far. Last week she gets super drunk and texts her ex. She feels confused. Decides to call it off with me, but also elaborates that she's been in this situation before and even uses "to be continued" to describe our ordeal. All of this happened within the course of a month.
>Background done
My question is, will she try to contact me again. Up until that point she was really into me. She remembered all the little details about me and remembered my schedule to a "T" and would text me right when she woke up.

Since it has only been a month I'm not really to attached to her, but if she tried to get in touch with me I wouldn't mind giving her a second chance.
>>
>>16845595
>>16845596
>>16845633

fucking underage cunts get out.

>>16845656
Everyone is different. Some girls like to get fucked hard in the middle of a city park with people seeing. Some think that's disgusting and weird, and will call you weird for suggesting it.

Everyone is different, and you never, ever take anyone's shit talk seriously. Its all bullshit.
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>>16845695

>fucking underage cunts get out

Are you retarded?
>>
>>16845589
8 F
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>>16845693
Lol Jon
>>
>>16845708

God damn. That's young. How did you discover it at that young of a age?
>>
>>16845708
11 M
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>>16845726
Women are indoctrinated by Satan at a young age how to use their cleaved wound to seduce the boyim and destroy them
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So, I asked a girl out and we had our first date about a week and a half ago. Went very well, I think.

Then, I went camping for a few days with some buddies and had no phone service. Came home, and was hospitalized for a week for diabetes complications.

Point is, I haven't spoken to her in almost two weeks, despite having a great time on our date. I'd like to ask her out again, but I feel like it's too late.

Ladies, is it too late? Would you think I was a jerk? Or do I have a legitimate excuse for not contacting her?
>>
>>16845695
Underage cunts? The question was what age we started masturbating. Idiot.
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>>16845589
16 or 17. Male
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>>16845662
Do women really enjoy being dry humped. I always thought they got nothing out of it.
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>>16845738
Not a girl, but nigga!!
Read what you just wrote out loud so you can hear yourself. I wouldn't call it an excuse, but it's definitely a good reason to not text anyone.
Did she know about your condition?
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>>16845748
>16 or 17. Male

What the fuck? I was humping pillows to simulate banging girls at 12.

God damn you late.
>>
>>16845589

>>16845726
Male, probably about that age as well or younger (probably like 6ish?)

You just do something, and realize it feels *really* good(i think I was messing around on one of those walking exercise machines swinging back on forth with my groin on the pole), and then you get curious see how you can replicate it.
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>>16845686
>Im not talking about legally, but socially. Does it make you a creepy old man?
>>16845364
>Obviously. That's why they have a law in almost all countries that says it's legal to have sex with girls that are 16-18+, and why once you hit 25, there's another law that raises that to 24+.

?
>>
Asking girls, mainly those who have dated/are dating a younger guy:

Compared to a guy of equal or greater age, how different are the dynamics of the relationship? Do you have different expectations of a younger guy than you do with an older guy? Are there certain things you are more likely to put up with when it comes to younger guys but not older ones?
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>>16845760
Not like I was missing out. Did it for a year and quit forever. Only reason I even started was because that was when I had discovered porn and it was new.
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>>16845758

No, she didn't know. I didn't think to contact her while I was in the hospital. I actually just got out of the hospital today, so I feel like if I'm gonna make a move, I should soon and be like "Hey femanon, was in the ICU so I could never call you. Wanna go out again?"

Just didn't know.
>>
>>16845755
Can't say for other women, but I really do. It feels good and naughty. And I have a thing for clothes.
>>
Women: how much do you "rely" on makeup to get through your day? Does anyone ever really see you without makeup on and what would the difference be if they do?
>>
>>16845726
My mother was pretty highly sexual, not purposely around me, but I probably subconsciously picked up on sexuality young due to this. She would be very loud during sex, would leave her toys out where I could see them, would make non-explicit-but-still-implicit comments to her partner or friends when I was in the room.

At the time I was not aware of what I was doing, I would tense up my whole body and rub against my bed prone and it felt very good. Now, looking back, it is obvious I was masturbating. Still practice this technique to this day.
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>>16845530
>>16845550
My friend has a body quite similar to yours and he's meeting all types of girls now. Your body image issues/self esteem is the real problem here, as anon pointed out >>16845550
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>>16845809
>would leave her toys out where I could see them,

Thats like child abuse.
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>>16845589
I remember figuring it out sometime in middle school. M
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>>16845530
What's your workout program like?
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>>16845767

fa·ce·tious
fəˈsēSHəs
adjective
treating serious issues with deliberately inappropriate humor; flippant.

>>16845781
I'm a dude but thought I'd point out a flaw in your logic, you're assuming it flexes both ways. Most of the time, people who date older, date older, people who actively seek out to date younger, date younger, and people who date the same age, date the same age. If any one ever deviates, it's because the individual they're seeing deviates from their norm or the age doesn't matter to them, not because they suddenly decided to flip flop their preferences.
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>>16845589
Without knowing what is was, I was around 5. I didn't know what a vagina was, all I knew was that rubbing it felt funny. Knowing full well what I was doing, I was 13. Also if it wasn't obvious, I am a female.
>>
Why do girls believe men are always looking for girls to fuck? sometimes i just want to chat a bit, and that's all.
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>>16845834
Ironically some girls I only wanted to chat with or chill, ended up wanting me to fuck them.
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>>16845809
>Still practice this technique to this day.
I'm just imagining someone trying to move like a caterpillar honestly.

>>16845834
People project bad experiences onto larger groups a lot of the time. I remember one girl that was stringing along 10 guys or so at once complaining about how men only want sex.

Note I knew some of these men, and she was very wrong.
>>
>>16845798
I prefer to wear makeup when I'm with my bf because we enjoy taking spontaneous naughty pictures and I want to look my best for them. Similarly, when out with friends, I tend to wear makeup.

Daily, when at work or school and nowhere else, I'll likely only wear makeup if I have an abundance of time when getting ready. I enjoy wearing makeup because it does make me look more attractive, but I know I am still attractive without it so sometimes the hassle doesn't seem worth it.

BTW, makeup for me usually consists of very slight blush, a thin blended line of eyeliner, and very subtle mascara. It is all very subtle. Occasionally I'll add some highlights to key facial features, and maybe some light lipstick and eyebrow pencil, usually when I know I will be photographed (I tend to make weird unattractive faces when I'm photographed, so it's nice to know makeup can at least help me overcome my photo-autism); this is only very occasionally, though, a handful of times a year.
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>>16845834
It's understandable, imagine yourself as an attractive girl getting stared at almost everywhere you go and getting loads of fb messages frequently. Though some girls are chill, they just need to be secure.
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>>16845814
If a child doesn't know their purpose is it detrimental? When I was young I thought they were some strange abstract statues made out of rubbery material. Or back massagers.
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>>16845809

I'm really sorry to hear that anon.. :/
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>>16845834
Girls only complain about guys wanting to fuck them when they aren't interested in the men in question.

To be honest though these women aren't wrong. Men, given the chance, have a good list of women they'd sleep with. This doesn't mean that men are incapable of being genuine friends though, and it irks me how men are shamed for simply desiring women the way they are fucking supposed to.
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>>16845852
>If a child doesn't know their purpose is it detrimental? When I was young I thought they were some strange abstract statues made out of rubbery material. Or back massagers.

The ideology of the pedo scare is that its a time bomb. Anything you're exposed to as a child is not scarring you in the moment. Its a time bomb that will go off in 10 years or so, and then if fuck you up.
>>
>>16845849
I don't stare at girls on the street, i do imagine it must be annoying, literally everyone looking at her ass, telling her shit to her ears.

If i see a girls starting at me, then look down with a smile, then i say hello and chat a bit, and if i like her i go ahead and ask her for a date.
>>
Male anons (or lesbanons)

Do you consider it a negative trait if a girl is kind of dorky/quirky/a little unpredictable?
>>
>>16845834
As a girl, I don't believe that in the slightest. I may be awkward as all hell sometimes but that doesn't mean I think the guy I'm talking to wants to bang me. Chatting is chatting, there's not a thing in the world wrong with it.
>>
So there's this cute girl in a foreign language class I'm taking at my uni, but I'm not sure how to ask her out. She sits nowhere near me and for all I know she has a class right after. I added her fb, since we actually have mutual friends and I was thinking of messaging her and asking her out, perhaps to talk about her living in the country that our class is based around (which she did live in the country for a year, I believe.) I know messaging on fb isn't exactly the best way to do things, but I don't really have a way in.
>>
>>16845864
Dorky? Fine. Quirky? Maybe, varies. Unpredictable sounds unstable unless it means a lot less to you than I.
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>>16845867
>As a girl, I don't believe that in the slightest. I may be awkward as all hell sometimes but that doesn't mean I think the guy I'm talking to wants to bang me. Chatting is chatting, there's not a thing in the world wrong with it.

What the fuck is wrong with just wanting to bang a girl anyway? Haven't feminists been fighting for a woman's right to "just have a fuck when they please"?
>>
>>16845867
>that doesn't mean I think the guy I'm talking to wants to bang me.
Well, you're half right in that some guys can separate a decent discussion and trying to get laid. But assuming you're even halfway attractive most of your male friends have thought of banging you even if its just as a 'what if'.
>>
>>16845872
Mmm, I dunno. I guess being spontaneous? Like, wanting to dance all of a sudden when some good music comes on? I've been called all of the three, but it never really bothered me until recently when someone admitted I was a bit too 'aggressive', whatever that means
>>
>>16845694
Samefag here
Guess I worded the question wrong.
>what are the odds of her contacting me within the coming month.
>>
>>16845834

I'm a dude, and one of my favorite things is meeting new people (male or female) and just chatting. And I can say because it's true the majority of the time.

My best friend is female, she's also gay. I've had to be a human shield so many times. We hang out a lot, and 95% of the time, when a guy starts talking to her, even to me it's obvious it's because they want to bang her. Of course we make fun of them like fucking crazy afterwards (because in the process, they usually prove themselves to be total tools. The nice ones we just forget about).

Hell, the same is true of gay guys too. I go with her to gay bars so she can meet women, and almost every time a guy that approaches me while we're at one, I'm like 90% sure it's because he thinks i'm "cute" and wants to fuck me. She ussually calls it out long before I do, even my girlfriends spotted a few that'd just be eyeing me from across the bar.

Collectively we've got some pretty funny stories of guys (straight and gay) hitting on either one of us and making total fools of them selves because it's pretty obvious what they want, even when they KNOW they have no shot.

Is what it is.
>>
>>16845856
I feel I have a very healthy sex life. I lost my virginity at a younger-but-not-too-young age (15), after careful consideration, to a person I cared about. I have never engaged in risk-taking behavior. I know what I like and dislike, find most pleasure in typical vanilla sex with a significant other, and can communicate sexual desires clearly and maturely.

Overall we are all the sum of our experiences, both good and bad. And everyone has both good and bad. I would not be the person I am today without my childhood, so I am comfortable with what I experienced.
>>
>>16845826

I do bodyweight. Push-ups, pull-ups, sit ups, crunches, leg lifts, lunges, squats.
>>
>>16845864
>Male anons (or lesbanons)
>Do you consider it a negative trait if a girl is kind of dorky/quirky/a little unpredictable?

I actually consider it kind of a positive trait. Actually... in fact.. thinking about it, it maybe one of the few things I've always looked for in a partner (including in my GF).

But I guess I'm all of those myself (just really good at being subtle about it though).
>>
>>16845881
Lol, dancing to all of a sudden to some good music is completely normal, it actually means that you are fun. I don't like girls who just lay around doing nothing accept look at their phone. Fuck that shit, fucking boring.
>>
>>16845798
Around the house = absolutely none
Going to school or errands = sunblock and conceal any spots if necessary
Going out with friends or family= sunblock, concealer, mascara, blush, and maybe eyebrow pencil
Special occasions (mainly wanting to doll up for my boyfriend) = all of the above plus eyeliner, eyeshadow, lip tint, and a bit of highlighting and contouring.

So pretty much everybody sees me without it on for the most part. I'm comfortable being in casual public setting without any. I definitely go for the natural "no makeup" makeup look.
>>
>>16845886
I guess that's good.

I didn't learn what sex was until I was about 14-15 years old. I never got "the talk". I only learned what they taught in school, and even then I didn't pay attention in class. I remember when I started 6th grade I thought girls could get pregnant from kissing. I didn't learn what a boner was until 7th grade even though I had been having them for a while. Didn't first masturbate until I turned 16-17 years old because I didn't understand how or why. I first kissed a girl at 18. First and only time I've had sex was when I turned 20. At 21 I had a lousy blow job from some slut. And now, I'm a 26 years old on a 5 year dry spell and I regret every sexual experience I've had because they were lousy.

It's like I don't even care about sex anymore. I had a chance to get a blow job from a girl I know just a few weeks ago and I turned her down
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>>16845881
An urge to dance is fine, I was thinking something more to the effect of ~manic pixie girl~. Enjoying the spice of life with some alternative interests is hardly a point against someone.
>>
>>16845899
lol, totally. In fact, at parties I am always the first one to start dancing, as well as the last one. Then I fall asleep and get cranky when I need to wake up to get into the car, lol.

I mean, it just seems to me that guys want girls who are all caked with make up, fake nails and eye lashes, twittering and facebooking. I don't fall into the group of the "cool girls" to be frank
>>
>>16845910
What would an ideal sexual situation be like for you? Most men would love to receive a blowjob from a random chick, but it sounds like you would prefer something different.
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>>16845897
is your girlfriend quirky then?
>>
>>16845873
Absolutely nothing. I never stated that in the slightest. If it was implied it wasn't intentional.
>>16845877
I guess that makes sense, but that doesn't mean their whole purpose for speaking to me is to get in my pants. Even if they are thinking about it, it's not necessarily their primary purpose. Maybe it is, however you can't just assume that from the get-go.
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>>16845910
>I didn't learn what sex was until I was about 14-15 years old. I never got "the talk". I only learned what they taught in school, and even then I didn't pay attention in class. I remember when I started 6th grade I thought girls could get pregnant from kissing

Wut?

I'm like a year older than you and I remember sex ed and people making dumb jokes at lunch right afterwards about semen, back in like 3 or 4th grade.


Anyway, as for the rest of your angst filled statement: You realized it's called sexual EXPERIENCE, as in, you get better at it the more you do it and learn right?
>>
>>16845919

>what would an ideal sexual situation be for you?

That's the thing, I don't even know. I really don't know.
>>
>>16845910
Are you me?

Been on a five year dry spell and still a virgin (only kissed a few times). But every time a girl pops up or something I don't even care that much. It takes me some time to get properly interested in a girl for something other than her looks, and because every chance I get is so fleeting it just hasn't happened yet. Acquaintance of mine also offered sex to me multiple times and I turned her down because I didn't sense the compatibility nor the physical attraction to go through with it.

I don't know you, but for me I'm finally starting to realize that far more than sex, I need to feel an emotional connection, I need to feel wanted and chosen to some extent. Once in HS I was offered a FWB and I turned it down. People mistake my frustration for not having had sex/met a girl yet for me just wanting sex, what they don't understand is that the concept of "sex" to me has always revolved around a meaningful emotional connection and chemistry, not just the physical act itself.
>>
>>16845925
Sounds like you need a gf
>>
>>16845924

>people making dumb jokes at lunch right afterwards about semen, back in like 3 or 4th grade.

in elementary school I was more interested in playing my N64 than that shit. I don't remember hearing sexual jokes until 6th grade. And I was lost in the sauce because I never paid attention in sex Ed. I didn't start paying attention until 7th grade
>>
>>16845922
>f it was implied it wasn't intentional.

so if a guy intentionally just wants to bang, thats bad?
>>
>>16845918
A lot of guys do want the pretty girls, it's true.

But I really just want a girl who's cool with herself. I don't even imagine myself with a female who's so obsessed with looks and spends hours a day on makeup. I mean, if I met a girl and she turned out to be really into her appearance/beauty but we had a real connection then I'd go for it, but I never seems to connect much with these girls to begin with so I don't think it matters.
>>
>>16845918
I admit there is a large percent of my friends who attracted to those basic bitches you just described, but that does not mean they are attracted to ONLY that type, they can be attracted to a variety of girls. I myself as a 21 year old guy who had success with women but does not go out to much, avoid these girls, and would like a girl who is more lively,chill and caring.
>>
>>16845938
dude, no one fucking pays attention in sex ed. Its one more class of schoolwork and boredom.

That doesn't mean you're not trying to rub millions out.
>>
Okay. So I had an eating/body image disorder I never really addressed when I was growing up. I was very thin, I looked good and elegant in everything. I saw nothing wrong with it. I felt beautiful. I consider myself androgynous as a girl, I don't like to dress ultra fem like tight dresses, skirts, etc. In fact I have never dressed like that, growing up I always dressed neutral. Anyway, these past few years I started dating someone new and it's kind of like my eyes opened. I realized this whole time I've been dressing andro and had no problem because I thought it was normal for every girl but it's not. So, with that in mind my style isn't considered that sexy because I don't dress myself to show off what I have. My boyfriend has always hinted at me gaining weight to get a bigger ass and boobs and so I did... I gained about 20 pounds and look healthy and thick in the right places. I was happy with myself for a while but now I feel like I have to relapse and lose all of this weight because I don't feel like how I'm supposed to. I feel like I'm forcing myself to be this feminine object when I'm truly not. I hate that my butt and boobs are starting to show through my clothes, ruining my whole look because I don't want to be seen as a fem/sexual object. I want to lose weight to feel/look neutral again but I know my boyfriend won't really like it. He won't mind it, but it kind of hurts my self esteem knowing that he's going to get more satisfaction from looking at girls with actual asses/boobs/the whole fem body than seeing with my stick of a body if I do decide to lose weight. Do I lose the weight and feel more comfortable in my skin like I used to or just suck it up and put on show to keep my boyfriend satisfied??
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>>16845921

I guess all of this is predicate on what you mean by quirky.

Is she Zooey Deschanell? No.

But is she filled with her own oddities that make her delightful to be around? Yup. I don't know anyone else that laughs and smiles so hard they start crying when they watch gifs of fat puppies stuck in bowls. It's all the random--kind of absurd--little things like that that I love about her.
>>
>>16845934

well, I do have a close female friend that I have feelings for. But unfortunately she lives in a different country. We are going to be meeting again in a few months, which I'm excited about. But also a bit worried because it's clear she has a high sex drive, and also clear she wants me.. But I'm pretty worried I'm going to dissappoint her with poor performance. Fuck my life
>>
>>16845177
My mind keeps racing in no direction
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>>16845950
See a therapist, it will help
>>
>>16845933

Same. It sucks because I think people think I'm a fag because I'm a single guy with money, and don't chase girls. I have to lie to my co-workers when sexual conversations come up. They don't understand I just don't care about sex. I told 1 guy that before and I think he actually think I'm a fag. Fml
>>
>>16845944
So if you avoid those girls to get one who is more chill, lively and caring, what are those other girls to you...?

>>16845943
Honestly, those girls only really talk about looking good with someone, it's all really shallow. I guess, it all ends in sex and looks with them?
>>
>>16845950
Keep up the healthy weight but not for your boyfriend solely, keep it for yourself to feel sexy. learn to feel comfortable in your new body. Do not sabotage yourself like that, start loving yourself.
>>
>>16845940
No no no, you misunderstood what I meant. I, me, myself, did not intentionally imply that it was bad to want to have sex with someone.
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>>16845962
They are boring, just that. They might be decent in a way, but not my cup of tea.
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>>16845952
lol, I didn't know who that was, had to look it up on google. She kind of looks like me, I dont even know if thats good...

You sound like a good boyfriend though
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>>16845954
I know it's pretty easy to say, but honestly try not to worry about disappointing her sexually. Most men I have been with were very nervous and fumbled the first time with me. This includes my current SO, who could not maintain an erection the first time, but now we share the best sexual connection I have ever experienced.

The thing that really improves sex of any kind is communication--if you can communicate how you feel and what you like, and learn how to read her communication, you will find a connection.

Best of luck with your meetup, hope you find what you need. And if not, I promise you will one day soon.
>>
>>16845947

I just didn't know anything.

I mean, I knew I liked girls. But didn't know why. In middle school I would go on MySpace, click videos and watch videos of girls kissing. And I would just sit there with a boner and do nothing.

Shit, I remember in high school, I woke up one morning and I guess I had a wet dream. I looked down and saw semen dripping out and thought "HOLY SHIT ITS LIKE IN THE PORN". That was the first time I saw my own semen, and I was like 16-17. A few days later I fapped for the first time into a rag and was shocked I actually came
>>
>>16845918
>I mean, it just seems to me that guys want girls who are all caked with make up, fake nails and eye lashes, twittering and facebooking.
Not really. That's the equivalent of a guy saying women only want roided out dudebros.

I myself tend to seek more bookish women.
>>
>>16845975

Well, the thing is I don't know what I like. And I think she is really anticipating a great sexual experience. Which I don't think I can provide.. Whatever.

Thanks though
>>
>>16845981
You don't know what you like now, but you will know what feels good when she does it.
>>
How the fuck do you friend zone a girl? She's obviously into me and knows I have a gf. I don't want to hurt her feelings but keeping her as a friend would do me some good.
>>
>>16845981
She's likely most looking forward to feeling close and affectionate with someone, more than just sex
>>
>>16845983

I hope. I never enjoyed anything about my previous experiences..

and I hope I don't dissappoint her. She doesn't know my sexual past. But I know she has experience. She's really excited for when we meet. So I'm really worried I'm not going to satisfy her. I mean, I'd rather her have the best possible experience and me get nothing out of it. I don't know, I'm stupid. Fuck
>>
>>16845961
So when you say you don't care about sex do you really mean "you haven't found the right person yet?" Or do you literally not care about sex? Because those are two pretty different things

>>16845962
>those girls only really talk about looking good with someone
These are the types IMO that fit well into the "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" relationships were women and men are diametrically opposed and are in a relationship primarily for sexual or "spiritual" reasons. I don't imagine too many of them care to be in a "chill" relationship. So it's actually quite fine because this sort of thing is what should at least ideally keep people apart.

Pretty much every girl I know has at least some experience with makeup. The difference seems to be those who spend tons of time on their appearance and those who only see makeup as a tool for when you're going out for the night or something. Like I said, if I really like a girl and we hit it off and she also happens to be into makeup, then fine, that's on her. But as per my first paragraph, the women who are super into makeup also *usually* seek out traditional relationship models which are not really my thing either.
>>
>>16845881
I personally like girls who are a little on the "aggressive," side. It all really depends on the person. There is some one for everyone.

don't take it from me though, i'm a dateless virgin :P
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>>16845990
Speak in private, or over the phone (NOT TEXT)
>I appreciate your attention, but I am not interested in pursuing any romantic relationship with you. I hope we can still be friends, I really enjoy your companionship. Thank you for being understanding of my feeling.

And then do your best to maintain the friendship, but understand if she cannot.
>>
>>16845994
Should also elaborate when I say women who are super into makeup, what I really mean is women who care a whole fuck ton about their appearance. Everything is about being the perfect weight, wearing the perfect outfit and having the perfect makeup and hair. And it seems like they do this for a couple of reasons, including attracting a certain type of man. I just really hope that they know what they want, and aren't expecting every guy to come running and chasing just because she followed that Kardashian foundation tutorial to a T or whatever.
>>
Does anyone else like to browse their worst matches on dating sites if just out of curiosity?
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>>16845991

I know it's more than just the sex. She sends me sweet messages all the time when I'm sleeping like "good morning!!! While you were sleeping, I imagined that I came into your room, crawled into bed with you and snuggled up into your arms! I put my hands on your chest and gave you a sweet and soft kiss and then we rested together before I had to work. Then I quietly slipped out of bed, covered you back up. Kisses your cheek and left :)"

Messages like that are common from her. Almost everyday. One morning after I woke up I texted her good morning and she said "good morning!" And sent this gif
>>
>>16845993
If you care for her as much as it sounds like you do, and she walks away feeling that, she will be happy.

As for fulfilling her sexually, even for those of us who have much experience each new partner is different. There will always be a slightly awkward learning curve in the beginning as you grow accustomed to your partner. Things that might work great with one person might need tweaking with another. The best way to overcome this is to engage frequently and often, whenever the mood strikes, in this case practice actually can make perfect.
>>
>>16845994

>you really mean "you haven't found the right person yet?" Or do you literally not care about sex? Because those are two pretty different things


I don't know! I honestly don't. I've had others chances for sex in the past and turned them down. I think about sex a lot. But don't have a desire to actually do it
>>
>>16846008
I think you will have that part down, pat. That's a good sign! Go with what feels good and natural, both with your level of affection and with sex, trust your instincts. You do that and the rest will fall into place.
>>
>>16846015
You may also be so inexperienced that you don't think you'd provide any meaningful sexual experience to another person, or you straight up can't understand why anybody would want to sleep with you.

Part of it is how you present yourself - if your relationships with people are mainly platonic and completely devoid of any sexual tension or romantic/flirty playfulness then many women won't see you that way. Another is how you are raised and how you live your life probably...I grew up being really into vidya, along with architecture, city planning, the weather, etc. geeky shit like that. Sex was something I never made a massive effort to get save for a few instances that ended badly and after those I stopped trying thinking it'd sort itself out one day. Yet here I am 5 years after my first and last semi-fling and I'm wondering how I've gone so long without going anywhere with a woman.
>>
>>16846009
>>16846019

I really hope so. Honestly, I'm also worried I'm getting to deep into something that in the long run won't work out. I know I'm going to get badly heart broken with this girl. Not because of anything she's done wrong. She's amazing. I really like her a ton. Just, we are on different paths. LDR won't work. Right now, we are just really close friends who have affectionate feelings toward each other. I know after we meet again I'm going to be fucked because when I left the first time after meeting her (on a platonic level) I was really depressed. Now that we will be intimate.. I can't imagine how shitty that 8 hour plane ride home will be.

I'm getting myself in too deep. I should withdraw while I can. But I can't because I like her.
>>
>>16846035

>You may also be so inexperienced that you don't think you'd provide any meaningful sexual experience to another person, or you straight up can't understand why anybody would want to sleep with you.

This I guess. I don't see a point in the effort. My experiences in the past sucked. so why waste my time with another bad experience when I could do something else that I like?
>>
>>16846037
I know what you mean, you're right that this could all end terribly with your heart torn up. But it could also lead to something significant, even if it means you have to try long distance for a while. Ultimately it's up to you to decide if the sacrifice will be worth the chance. I don't envy your decision. At the end of the day, though, you will be better for the experience, however the situation plays out.
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>>16846055

our paths are just too different. A real relationship wouldn't workout sadly.

This is going to sound really corny and stupid. But I think this experience with her is going to be my "1 love" (I cringed at typing that because of how gay it sounds). But really, I think this is going to be one and only experience with this. I'm just going to be done with sex and girls once our "thing" ends. I think I'll be content with that choice whenever whatever we have is over.
>>
guys

Whats an absolute deal breaker for a girl that make you not want a relationship with her, excluding cheating
>>
>>16846076
Poor communicator
Crazy (either by disease or by personality)
Sloppy in dress and living space
Impolite/rude
>>
>>16846076

She's not a nice person/is a bitch.
She actively uses/manipulates people.
She is a vegan that preaches/tries to guilt trip others (I'm a foodie. I love meat as much as veggies).
She's vapid as fuck.
She tries to get in my pants within the first 30 minutes of meeting me (It's not like I haven't had one night stands before, but if you're that obvious and desperate about it, turn off).
>>
>>16846076
>cant cook
>doesn't know how to manage her money
>Too much makeup
>no good relationship with her parents and family
>no hobbies
>doesn't read
>doesn't know how to speak properly/have intellectual conversations

It seems like a lot, but these things one can easily pick up after a few conversations where I decide then and there if they're worth my time
>>
My girlfriend openly flirted with a guy in front of me last night. She had introduced me to him by only my first name and went on to say he was quite an attractive guy later in the night. Today he sent her a friend request and she sent me a message whether or not she was allowed to accept.

I had made it clear I was jealous about the encounter and I'm not quite sure how i should act.

What should I do?
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>>16845834
That's the hook up generation for you.
Blame the other men that go out only to fuck.
>>
I just found out my brother has multipersonality/disconnection disorder and it's getting worse, how do I deal with this and what do I do?
>>
>>16846111
Help him get the professional treatment he needs
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>>16846114
He's seeing a councilor now. I told my mom for years he needs help and now he's actually crazy, she's thinking of taking him to a mental hospital, she never listens to me if she did get him help earlier he probably wouldn't be like this it's really hard for me not to be upset with her, I love him so much we where always there for each other and now I'm so afraid
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>>16846097
you terminate the relationship immediately. if she hasnt fucked him yet, shes going to. she has likely been cheating on you for a while. even on the remote chance that neither of these are true, she still does not respect you. either way, if you stay with her, you will be entering a world of pain. my sympathies, anon
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>>16845871
Shit move anon.
Personally, I ignore people who don't talk to me irl and then add me on facebook
Talk to her irl, catch up after or before class and say hello, ask if she wants to study together or go have lunch after class
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>>16846155
I didn't think it'd be that extreme. She's the kind of girl to get angry at me if I watched porn.
>>
>>16845589
Male 5
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>>16846264

what the hell. Is that even possible?
>>
>>16846231
Red flags for this and the guy situation.

Come on, dude.
>>
How would I go about approaching this girl in a class group without seeming like a thirsty nigga? Talked a little bit and she seems cool but I dont think I should jump straight to asking to do something since that seems like its doing too much for meeting someone right out of the gate
>>
>>16846297
A lot of children start touching themselves at a young age, albeit unintentionally. I used to rub my dick when I had to pee because it felt good and made the urge to piss go away. If you ask your parents or try to remember you probably touched yourself at a young age too.
>>
Girls, I'm a guy that's torn between staying with his gf of almost four years who I haven't loved for like two but feel responsible for and starting a relationship with a lovely girl who I'm completely crazy for but who I think might be slightly unbalanced due to abandonment issues and how quickly she developed strong feelings for me. What do?
>>
>>16846483
Follow your heart, anon. It's your life, not someone else's. You have no obligation to stay with someone you don't love, you don't owe them anything.
>>
Ladies, I'm a coward.

Is this the #1 Red Flag and Turnoff in any man?
>>
>>16846076
Crazy
Blatantly manipulative
Habitual liar
>>
Fellow guys, how old were you when you had your first relationship?
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>>16846517
Depends at what level. Are you a coward everytime something serious goes down? Or are you just afraid to get beat up by chads.
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>>16846517
can you be a bit more specific? are you a coward in social situations or in general?
>>
Ladies, I have two questions!

1: How hard is it for a girl to orgasm during normal sex?
2: My girl doesn't often cum before I do, and as such I mostly always cum before she does. However, I always make her cum when fingering afterwards.

Is this OK? Any tips on how to last longer?
>>
>>16846587
>1: How hard is it for a girl to orgasm during normal sex?
depends purely on the girl. but i'd say a big part has a rather hard time cumming during sex.

>cum before she does
i can only speak for myself. but as long as we both get to have an orgasm i couldn't care less about who comes first. actually, i prefer him cumming first and then gettnig me off otherwise. that's personal preference since all the horny get's sucked out of my body when i have a real good orgasm. and since he would still want to stick his peepee inside me it's WAY better to keep me horny for that part of having sex.

>Any tips on how to last longer?
Why? this is a fucking meme
>>
>>16846598
Thanks for your input. Was not aware of the meme status, but was just an honest question I'd asked.
>>
>>16846587
>How hard is it for a girl to orgasm during normal sex?
This entirely depends on whether or not you are doing anything to pleasure her, and whether penetration is enough to make her orgasm. Not all girls can orgasm from penetration alone. The clitoris is your friend.

>My girl doesn't often cum before I do, and as such I mostly always cum before she does. However, I always make her cum when fingering afterwards.

Do you do any foreplay at all? Believe it or not, foreplay is 90% of the sex for a girl, and skipping it to get to the fucking faster isn't going to do her many favors. There are a sea of information on good foreplay out there, so take your pick.
>>
>>16846616
We do a lot of foreplay! I don't think that that is the problem, she often wants to fuck faster while I still like to do foreplay. I made her cum a couple of times from just fucking, but I have better experiences with playing with her twat after sex, often those orgasms are more powerful too.
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>>16846608
the average guy lasts 7 minutes.
if you try to last an hour or some shit you will just bore the girl out of her mind.
here's how perfect sex would look like from my perspective.
some sort of foreplay, kissing, cuddling, making out, dry humping, then proceeding to groping, fingering, and lastly oral to get everything ready, wet and slippery. might take approximately 10-20 mins.
i don't want to cum from you giving me oral, yet! I want to be all horny and wet to get started.
then i'd say some missionary first just to really focus on that AWESOME first insertion. i love to lock eyes at that point. or look down to see the action.
some kissing and humping. just thrust away, really. maybe alternate speeds a bit. some long and slow strokes mixed in to hard and fast fucking.
then i'd say some position switchings. this might be enough to give you a "break" in order to not cum THAT fast. i would throw in some cowgirl, absolutely. doggy is required too. and if i'm really in the mood, i'd be able to cum on your dick in prone-bone position.
if not, i love to be in missionary again to see your orgasm-face when you cum inside me.
then i like to just stay like that for a while, hug and kiss, and just enjoy the intimacy. maybe i'm not even in the mood for cumming. but if i'm still horny you should then give me a handjob. that's pretty basic but i love sex like that.
>>
>>16846646
oh, and the sex part might take about 15-30 mins. i'd say. followed by 10-20 mins fro cuddling and fingering.
>>
I'm a guy that can't cum unless I masturbate hard. I just can't come unless my hand is involved. I can go at sex for more than an hour till I just "get bored" and start going soft. What can I do?
>>
>>16846664
do you always masturbate the same way? try switching it up to get used to cumming from different kind of stimulations.
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>>16846664
do you use a tight grip? You need to loosen it up and cut down on the masturbating.

Otherwise foreplay and fuck her for 10minutes or whatever then finish her off with manually then yourself.
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>>16846664
God Hand syndrome. Heavenly, but no mortal can ever please you. Lighten the grip a bit.
>>
Have any of you spent time in the hospital for something serious?

If so, what was it?

What was it like?
>>
Girls on /adv/, is disgusting or turn-off a foreskin that doesn't slide when the dick is erect and/or with condom?
>>
>>16846534
I cry easily.
>>
>>16845589
12, Male
A friend who taught me
>nohomo
>>
>>16846768
not really. The guy I used to see has a foreskin like that. I don't really mind.
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>>16846697
Been hit by a car frontally when biking to an important exam.
9 days at hospital with chest tube, one surgery to sew nerves and tendons together again and around 50 stitches among multiple scars, one of them from the elbow to the wrist.

Was it good, the food was good and I had time to rethink my life, I even met a cute teen nurse who left me a lovely note, but due to my anon nature I didn't had the guts to contact her after I left the hospital.

Is a wonderful and awful experience simultaneously, depends how you carry it on, because it will surely change you forever (like it changed me, physically and emotionally)
>>
/thread
>>
Ladies,

If you have chatted with a guy a few times, say at a book club or a yoga class, and the guy finds you utterly attractive, not just physically but in behavior and general philosophy, do you like to hear this before you have been asked out on a date? Are there acceptable levels/ways you find more acceptable than others?

For example, what if you were to receive a nice, but not overly gushing, poem on a card? Or what if the guy just laid out all his cards on the table and then asked you out?

I know that a positive response is going to rely more on if I can show her I am someone she would like to get to know better, but I think the above is important too.
>>
>>16846796
Just ask her out.
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>>16846788
My ex had severe phimosis. I didn't really care too much but i would have prefered him doing something about it. Mainly because sometimes he hurt himself when thrusting too hard and accidentially pulling back too far. And it was hard giving a good bj without being able to work the glans. And yes, the idea of him never being able to really pull back for cleaning is kind of disgusting. Just start stretching it. That's what we did. It was actually a lot of fun and very intimate.
We made good progress, but then we went separate ways for entirely unrelated reasons so i have no idea if he continued to stretch and if he was ever able to pull back completely.
>>
>>16846803
I normally would just ask the girl out. In this case, to elaborate, she is my yoga instructor...

It's probably the most common thing in the world and I am worried that I am just one of thousands of guys that have turned up to her class and fallen in love. I feel like I have to find a way to stand out to her first.

I figure she's probably sick of rebuffing approaches. Hell, I don't even know if she has a partner either.
>>
>>16846804
severe phimosis is a much worse condition, I'm not at this point, I just can't painlessly retract the foreskin when my dick is pumping lots of blood, having a massive boner, otherwise it works just fine.
I'm just a little insecure about the appearance of my dick that doesn't looks like most of the dicks around with a big glan and almost no visible foreskin when erect
>>
>>16846789
> I even met a cute teen nurse who left me a lovely note

That's actually really sweet, anon.

>because it will surely change you forever (like it changed me, physically and emotionally)

How did it change you, if you don't mind me asking..?
>>
>>16846811
I've heard that is pretty common to fall in love with your psychologist and your yoga instructor, she knows it too and surely know how to deal with it well, just tell her your feelings and let the things happen, give up control a little, maybe sound a little scary but is relieving once you do it
>>
>>16846796

I'm a dude, but I'm going to go ahead and say that 98% of the time, that is a fucking terrible idea unless the person is equally naive or particularly weird.

It's a red flag that shows that brings in to question your ability to operate socially normally enough to be able to control and express your emotions through appropriate means.

You're essentially jumping the gun out of desperation/social ineptitude, and it can make you look emotionally unstable.
>>
>>16846819
>That's actually really sweet, anon.
Thanks, I'm very fond of this situation in particular, was one of the most meaningful moments at the hospital and I've kept to this day that already torn piece of paper.

>How did it change you, if you don't mind me asking..?
It's ok, Physicaly I have completely lost the extensor movement on the left thumb and my left hand fingers doesn't open at full extension anymore, nevertheless most of the functionality have been restored and after a short adaptation period I have resumed all my activities.
Emotionally I have changed a lot, the sudden lost of control of my own life and all the time spent laid in bed without anything else to do made me reflect a lot about my life and about what I was doing with me, it also helped me to see who really cared about me and who simply doesn't, this time to reconsider relations, priorities and all of my life aspects helped me to mature as a person and put my life on trails again barely from the scratch was something that indeed changed me forever. I had two choices, complain and fight against the world, blame God and destiny for what happened to me or just accept it and learn the invaluable lessons that this circumstance has to offer me, I choose the latter and this decision wasn't easy, but was the key to my recovery
>>
Anyone

What does it actually mean to have a "healthy sex life". What exactly is a healthy sex life?
>>
>>16846838
Well, there is a trade off. I am aware not everyone likes to wear their heart on their sleeve and be open. I don't think that equates to desperation or ineptitude though.

The idealist in me thinks it should be a good thing to hear that someone thinks you are lovely no matter the surrounding circumstances or outcomes.

Out of interest, what are "appropriate means" of emotional expression to you?
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>>16846867
>>16846819
*the note
>>
How should one treat your ex/exes?

Should I treat them like they were a disease or can you become friends or even BFF's?
>>
>>16846874
Be yourself, this means didn't trying to prove anything to anyone, this is really powerful and not only an appropriate mean to express yourself but to live your life
>>
>>16846867
>I've kept to this day that already torn piece of paper.

Makes me wonder what she wrote. Must be something significant to make you keep it for so long.

>Physicaly I have completely lost the extensor movement on the left thumb and my left hand fingers doesn't open at full extension anymore, nevertheless most of the functionality have been restored and after a short adaptation period I have resumed all my activities.

I'm sorry if this comes off as too personal, but do you ever... hate your injuries? Like, it limits you.

>I had two choices, complain and fight against the world, blame God and destiny for what happened to me or just accept it and learn the invaluable lessons that this circumstance has to offer me, I choose the latter and this decision wasn't easy, but was the key to my recovery.

Yeah, I can understand your frustration with God. Being put in a really awful situation makes you doubt things, even the really profound. Maybe I am naive, but I thank God, rather than blame him. I like to believe he watches over me. Still, I admire your strength, I really do. It makes me happy that you've moved past it and taken the good from it, rather than the bad.
>>
>>16846872
F here,

I think that a healthy sex life is to truly know your body and not having fear to satisfy your desires

Normally you would achieve this by having a intimate and trustworthy regular sex partner, usually a bf or gf, but not necessarily
>>
>>16846884

but what about for those who don't have sex? I haven't even placed my hands on a girl in 5 years.

Does that mean I have a Unhealthy sex life?
>>
>>16846872

In the context of a relationship having a sex life that is mutually natural (as opposed to forced) fun (as opposed to boring), and ultimately satisfying (in frequency/inventiveness/whatever).

>>16846874
Yes, it's nice to hear something thinks you are lovely, but there is definitely always an time, place, and progression in your relations with someone that makes something appropriate or not.

I love you after knowing someone for 5 months. Perfectly appropriate.
I love you after knowing someone for 5 minutes.
Totally inappropriate.

You don't get to truly know someone until you've spent some serious one on one time with them where in you've established a personal connection. Prior to that, the breadth of your experiences are purely superficial impressions of them. It is--literally by definition--naive to expound some deeper understanding based off of that; doubly so if you feel like these emotions are overwhelming enough that you can't admit them in person and have to confess them through a note.

Just be a normal person and ask her out in person. You can even say, "Hey, I think you're a lovely person and like the way you think. Would you like to join me for a coffee?" But not in a secret confession note. You're an adult, not a 4th grader.

I say all this as someone who does get the urge to write random love notes and poetic phrases while in the throes of love, the thing is I know that the majority of this stuff is inappropriate to admit in the moment I'm feeling them and just save them for later for when they are.

When my girlfriend and I first met, we both started a cache of notes written that we wrote, saved, and showed to each other months after we first wrote them. In the time they DEFINITELY would have been too much and would have scared one another away, but months later they made total sense because we now had the experience to back the sentiments.
>>
>>16846889
It means you have no sex life.
If that is causing you distress, this is unhealthy.

You could masturbate a little, stay in touch with what turns you on, while you seek a partner with whom you can mutually fulfill each other. That may be once a month, or three times a week.
>>
>>16846896

but if I really don't care. Than is that unhealthy? Like I really don't care that it's been 5 years.
>>
thoughts on adding an ex on social media after 8 months since the break up?
>>
>>16846076
hypocrites
Feminist
Girls with poor Hygiene
miserable Girls
stupid girls
>>
>>16846894
Yes, point taken. I completely agree with you.

I would never in a million years say I "love" her. And I also know that as strong an attraction as I am feeling, it is based on a superficial experience of her.

I suppose in a roundabout way, I wanted to assess if it was worth acknowledging the strength of initial attraction while making clear that it is with a view to getting to know her further and hopefully showing her that I am someone she would like to spend time with.
>>
>>16846882
>Makes me wonder what she wrote. Must be something significant to make you keep it for so long.
The contents of the note isn't exactly what I really value on it instead I keep it for what it meant to me in such a hard time, can't put into words, but this gave me strength, as an anon, I couldn't even remember the last love note that I received from a girl, and if even in that situation she liked me that way, then it was all up to me and nothing was really lost. This gave me hope.

>I'm sorry if this comes off as too personal, but do you ever... hate your injuries? Like, it limits you.
More than once I got caught into this train of thought and began to feel really bad about those injuries, at these moments I always remember myself of what could have happened, and this comforts me, because the consequences could have been far worse, and I'm very grateful for it. I agree with you that surely God took care of me there and is not naive to think that he watches over us all the time.
>>
>>16846898

She(he?) already answered you.

>It means you have no sex life.
>If that is causing you distress, this is unhealthy.
>>
>>16846898
I don't think so. Perhaps you will meet someone who will change your mind or perhaps you will become horny again for a while. Just go with what you are feeling like at the time...I think that is healthy.

But, to the very core of your being, be sure that you really don't care and you're not just telling yourself that.
>>
>>16846872
if it doesnt bother you in any negative way when you hear, see or talk about sex related stuff

ist like when do you have enough Money. ist when you dont have to worry about it anymore

same goes for sex imo

>>16846900
why not if you have interest in the other Person. you can get along as ex Partners too
>>
>>16846907
>But, to the very core of your being, be sure that you really don't care and you're not just telling yourse

I don't really know how to tell. I used to care a few years ago. But I haven't had even a speck of care the past 2 years. I've had a few opportunities to get laid the past 2 years and passed all of them up.
>>
guys,
what do girls do that really ignite a crush?
is it beauty or attitude? is it her tastes?
be direct, please
>>
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How standard is going down on a girl for hookups?

Seems kinda tryhard for one night stands/casual sex with someone you probably wont have sex with again for a while/ever. More reserved for a relationship/longer term thing

Thoughts?
>>
>>16846900

Depends entirely on how it ended (messy or clean) and how over them you are.

If there's any lingering feelings, bad idea.
>>
>>16846915
I don't know because I don't live the hookup lifestyle. But I really don't see any good reason why you wouldn't go down on a girl on any given night for some fun.
>>
>>16846914

Interest. If a girl ticks a guys boxes, it doesnt necessarily mean anything.

There are a lot of hot girls out there
There are a lot of cool girls out there
There are less, but still a lot, of hot cool girls out there

But it doesnt really mean shit if shes not interested in you, shes just another girl.

Show interest, be flirty, show that you're not just another dumb hoe that plays stupid games and thinks "xd im a woman men should always do everything WHY ISNT HE ASKING ME OUT"

Girls in my eyes can go from completely average to hot if she shows she likes me. Being wanted feels damn good
>>
How can I learn so much things at once?
I have 3 jobs, all of them related to IT and with almost no relation between. How can I master many unrelated skills at the "same time" (not really simultaneously)
Is it possible just with a rigid routine and advanced time management techniques?
>>
>>16846914
obviously how she Looks is important but what would really light you up for me would be if you are playful, cute and comfy with me being the one who guides you. also i like it alot when Girls are very open to me and also open for new stuff in General

also if a Girls is interested in my life. it might Sound weird but if someone has true authentic interest in me ist a huge fucking + already.

also i think those things often overule Beauty unless you are seriously bad looking. in that case i think its extremely bad luck and hard to Counter it
>>
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>>16846919

I have a "friend" that went down on a girl during a hookup and she ditched him after before they actually had sex to go get with someone else and fuck them instead

Granted she a hoe and he's a retarded permavirgin but the seed of doubt was planted in my mind
>>
>>16846914
guys,
what do girls do that really ignite a crush?
is it beauty or attitude? is it her tastes?
be direct, please

Every guy is different. For a ton of guys when they're younger, it's just being physically attractive.

For me, it's always been a certain personality, certain way of acting. I've always compared the girls I'm attracted to to sources of heat.

My girlfriend I once called the warm summers sunrise reflected off the ocean on a clear day. Bright, clean, warm, and refreshingly promising of a new day.

Another girl I once compared to the hot embers of a bonfire. Wild, exciting, hypnotizing, and a little mysterious.

(p.s. To other anon. These are part of the thoughts I write down but never share with girls 'til a certain point because I know it's weird as fuck.)

>>16846915
It's standard for me, but I usually like doing it.
>>
>>16846914
I am attracted to girls (and people in general) who I feel share similar values and are comfortable enough to be themselves. That can take shape in many different ways both physically and mentally. I know that is vague, but it is the way it is for me.
>>
>>16846929
Haha fucking hell. Well, I don't know about that. Would you accept a blow job on a hook up? Should that be any different the other way round? I don't see why there should be any big deal doing anything on a hookup if that's what you're into. Get the whips and chains out I you like.
>>
>>16846560
>in general?

Mostly this.

I really do feel like I'm not allowed to have any amount of confidence as a person.
>>
>>16846934
>>16846932
>>16846928
>>16846920
so you guys agree that a girl with personality is attractive, a girl that stands for herself about her preferences and beliefs and don't changes her values all the time to please or to match someone's own values?
>>
>>16846940

Fair point. But I think in general people see blowjobs as a lot more casual than going down on a girl.
>>
>>16846943

Depends what the guy in question likes

Some guys might like that, some might not and prefer someone different. If you're asking what guys like thats a different question altogether to "how to ignite a crush"

If he likes your personality, he'll like your personality. But nothing will happen without some sort of spark to get things going.
>>
>>16846940
>>16846944
Clearly there is no comparison between a blowjob and making oral sex to a grill, is like comparing making and eating a street hot dog with making and eating strawberry cheesecake
>>
>>16846944
>Fair point. But I think in general people see blowjobs as a lot more casual than going down on a girl.

Part of me wanted to jump in and call that a double standard, but then I remember my girlfriend was more than happy to give me a blowjob, but was SUUUPER squeemish about me going down on her and didn't let me do it until waaaaay later in our relationship.

I think she said it was just way more intimate a thing than even sex to her, but then again my girlfriend has special circumstances so no idea if those an influence

*shrug*

>>16846943
>so you guys agree that a girl with personality is attractive, a girl that stands for herself about her preferences and beliefs and don't changes her values all the time to please or to match someone's own values?

To me, the by far the most attractive thing is someone who sticks to their guns and tries to be a good person, especially during the hard times when life's fucked up and it'd be easier to do otherwise.
>>
>>>16846943
I'm not saying that alone would make ne crush on a girl but yes, it's attractive to me that a girl has some life experience, her own sense of self and maybe has a thing or two to show me about the world too.
>>
>>16846948
that is my point, is personality and self-confidence that spark?
because beauty and likes clearly aren't
>>
>>16846943
big fucking yes
>>
>>16846958

This might just be me, but theres a difference between finding a girl attractive (based on looks, personality, likes etc.) and actually liking the girl

Like I said, theres a whole lotta fucking girls out there. You cant like em all just because they might dig the same vidya as you, or because they're hot, or because they lean the same way as you politics wise etc.

Theres gotta be something more.
You gotta put yourself out there and make yourself available, so to speak

This guy might like you, he might not.
If hes not into you, then nothings to come of the situation

If he finds you attractive, he might not know if you're interested in him.

Drop hints and shit. Talk about being single. Compliment his stuff. Talk about something you're both interested in.

Thats the spark. Thats the point where a man goes from thinking "Shes hot" and carrying on with his day, to "Actually, I really like her. I should ask her out"
>>
>>16846951

Exactly my point. They're like apples and oranges.
Its a whole different ball park

>>16846956

Yeah thats my thinking. A friends girlfriend is funny about oral sex as well.
You cant really compare blowjobs and cunninglingus (shit thats hard to spell)
>>
When did you first fuck, your impression ?
Also F, M ?
>>
>>16845208
I do not find this to be true. That is just bravado. Confidence is helped by realizing that absolutely everyone has insecurities and doubts (unless they are mentally broken), but just that there is a time and place to display them. I have found that realizing everyone besides sociopaths are not as confident as they generally appear beneficial in displaying confidence when I need to, and saving the self doubt for quieter introspection, when it's healthy.
>>
>>16845587
Really. Your brain has issues, but your body is fine. Work on your self esteem.
>>
>>16845453
Careful with the copying, of course. As filmed stuff hides a LOT. But this is true in my experience overall, yeah.
>>
guys, what do you think about a girl who listens to Kanye West?
>>
girls

why is it so difficult to forgive me? I was one of the best friends of a girl who was wonderful. I fell for her, she already had a BF, so I started being an asshole to her, she forgave me a couple of times till she realised that I was not going to stop. She told me to never speak to her again, and at first I was OK with that, then I realised that I missed her and all the group of friends who I used to hang out with. I asked for forgiveness, she told me to forget it and that things would eventually become as they were before, but I became very insistent, she then said we could never be friends again. That was ok since I was in love with her, so it was very difficult to be friends with her. But now it's been a year, I have tried to replace her with other friends, but it's not the same. I just want her to talk to me again, at least once, so I know that she's not angry at me still. I really loved her, but now she doesn't want to be around me anymore. I'm so stupid, because she was so good to me and I hurt her, and now I'm alone, and she doesn't want to forgive me.

What can I do, femanons?
>>
>>16845886
I have a quite similar life experience as you do. I did get sexually herassed by my older brother when I was 8 though (I did not know it was sexual abuse back then and I told noone because he threatened me ). It didn't get any further than him fingering me and me playing with his dick. He was nearly forcing me to give him blowjobs but I kept refusing since I believed that pee would come out. This experience didnt ruin anything for me either. I think my brother also realised its bad. We never talked about it After I realised what actually happened.
Now I have a very nice boyfriend who I am with for quite a while and I lost my virginity at 18 years old. Have done nothing strange and been masturbating regulary.
>>
Dear women, how do I deal with you after you had your menopause and you turned into insufferable hags intent on destroying everything?
>>
>>16845589
8 years old, Male
>>
>>16846951
>>16846976

Apples and oranges in terms of technique complexity perhaps. But it's the same general principle of doing something nice for another. I for one don't like to "keep score" on the magnitude of good deeds exchanged between friends/lovers etc. That is for business relationships.
>>
>>16845589
Female
Rubbing cause it felt good, before I can remember
Rubbing myself to get off, 13
>>
>>16847019
Female, with 16
With my first girlfriend at a school skiing trip. It was a lot of fun though we didn't quite succeed at the "sex" thing at first, it was very relaxed and romantic, and I remember it very fondly.
>>
So i like this one girl, but i missed like two big oportunities to get her number(both after we talked for a relativly long time), because i was too shy to ask for whatever reasons. My friend doesnt want to give me her number, because i should ask her personally for it. But if i dont literally show up at her work only to ask for the number it could take quite a while until i have an oportunity again. What should i do? What is the most normal and the most confident way to get her number and after that a date?
>>
>>16847019
>Also F, M ?
m

>When did you first fuck
dunno exactly. either with Age 17 or 18

>your impression ?
it was horrible to be honest
>both drunk as fuck
>no clue how to do anything
>she just got into doggy and offered her pussy
>thought i just Need to put it in
>didnt work somehow
>Panic
>force it in
>thepain.jpg
>tried to cum
>nope
>tell her to give me a bj
>couldnt cum either
>told her im too drunk
>went to sleep then
>next day wake up and see dick swollen and covered with blood
everywhere (bursted vein)

well later i figured i forced my way into her completely dry

she knows that i fucked up hard but didnt know it was my first time. till this day she thinks i just suck in bed while These days i got pretty good after i got some xp

gosh what would i give to rek her pussy properly now.

tl;dr i fucked up 100% but learned alot from it
>>
Not sure if a common question, it's more for women but men's answers could help somewhat as well.

What is the etiquette in terms of dating? Specifically, what are the "rules" or limits after a first casual date and a second "date" planned in some weeks with one woman, and possibly FWB stuff available in between the two dates with another woman? I'm normally too easily loyal to the point I've rejected women over one other woman even before a first date, so far with no luck; I wonder if that might not be the way to go after all.

Long story short: Got a female FWB (nothing but kissing and flirting happened yet), romantically interested in another woman (made out once prior at a party) and already had a first date (parted ways with a hug). Told the FWB before that date it might be best if we stay plain friends, but there's still some mutual physical attraction. (This all happened last week.) This weekend there may be a chance the FWB will come on to me during/after a party at my place, and a small chance I'll end up giving in and go for sex. (Yay alcohol.)
I don't want to do anything that could be seen as cheating though, easily capable of controlling myself in such case even if blackout drunk. Obviously it would be cheating if it was already something serious, but at this point it's not even sure yet if she's interested in anything serious either.

Additional question would be if such scenario could be considered cheating in any way?
>>
>>16847019

9, M.

Babysitter sucked my Dick first. Then, she tried to put it in her vagina. I didn't understand anything back then.

BTW, it didn't fit in, and then she gave up. 3 years later I understood what had happened.
>>
>>16847151
wtf
>>
Girls what does it mean when you don't wish a guy you're seeing happy birthday?
I mean we're not official yet but she comes over and stays the night all the time. I just find it odd she didn't wish me anything not even a single text
>>
>>16847191
Maybe she just forgot. Don't overthink it.
>>
>>16846646
Sounds great, to be honest.
>>
do guys prefer girls moaning or screaming in bed?
>>
>>16846877
Depends on your personality and theirs, and it depends on the terms you broke up with, if it was a (somewhat) mutual decision and such.

Often enough even if you both agree to stay on good terms or to try and stay friends, the friendship will fade over time.

I have 1 ex with whom I still have contact, she and I broke up on good terms though it was her doing the breaking upping. It hurt for a good while as I still had feeling for her, but over time they faded. We still have contact from time to time, which is fading as time passes, but it's genuine. I care about her still (much like I care about my friends, but a bit stronger naturally), and like hearing she's happy now and whatnot. We both genuinely wish each other well, hope things will go our way and such, yet I have zero desire to start anything with her again - nor she with me.

It's possible to become friends, but how you "should" treat your exes completely depends on the situation and differs per person nor will you be able to be friends with everyone as your ex.
>>
Is arguing mandatory in a relationship?

Also, why are partners allowed and not allowed to have secrets at the same time?

Also, why is honesty some times more worse than lying?
>>
>>16847045
Nothing in particular, I don't really judge based on music taste. My taste is quite broad and I can enjoy listening to a wide range of genres and bands/artists. Someone enjoying some artists or songs I don't particularly like (not talking Kanye specifically) doesn't make me hate them; to each their own, taste is subjective.
>>
Girls,

By a significant margin, my biggest turn on is the fantasy of a girl enjoying being fucked by a horse / zebra. I've no desire to actually see this fantasy acted out, but it is probably not something I could hide from a partner, horse dildos are a thing and well, you know...

How to broach this subject with girls while dating? Because I don't want to waste their time if they're so offended by the thought that they would not want to date me because of it.
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