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How do you break up with a girl?
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Anonymous
How do you break up with a girl? 2016-02-10 10:47:50 Post No. 16790512
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How do you break up with a girl? Anonymous 2016-02-10 10:47:50 Post No. 16790512 [Report]
A girl just stormed out of my house in tears because I broke up with her. She felt that it was completely random and that I wasn't being open with her and that frustrated her to the point of tears. The reason she feels that way is because I had to perform a whole array of linguistic gymnastics to try to let her down in all sorts of disingenuous ways in order to avoid telling her that "I'm simply no longer attracted to you."

This is a pattern I have. Every time I seek to end a relationship, my reasons for doing so seem too cruel to say out loud. So I guess what I'm asking is for advice on to properly break up with someone. Should I have just told her, "Because I find you unattractive" when she demands a reason rather than vague bullshit like "I just think we're on separate wave lengths"?

What are your thoughts on breaking up, /adv/?

One more thing. She and I had a pregnancy scare a week ago. She took a pregnancy test in the middle of the day and it came back negative. The tests are supposedly most accurate in the morning, so I want to ask her to take another one at the proper time but after tonight I'd obviously like to avoid calling her in the next week and asking her to take another pregnancy test, or asking her if she's had her period yet. Since the first test came back negative, you guys think we're in the clear? Even if the testing conditions weren't ideal?
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Anonymous 2016-02-10 10:53:42 Post No.16790527
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Anonymous 2016-02-10 10:53:42 Post No.16790527 [Report]
The key to a good breakup is a matter of timing, not wording. Nobody ever really cared why they were getting broken up with so much as the fact that it was happening. You don't really need linguistic gymnastics so much as softening the blow. "I'm not attracted anymore" becomes "you're wonderful, but I've lost passion and it wouldn't be fair of me to continue"

Doing this immediately after the pregnancy scare is a bit of a rollercoaster for her I'm sure.
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