File: download.jpg (14 KB, 242x208) Image search: [Google]

14 KB, 242x208

I'm 19, Kansas, about to head off to college in less than 4 months, and everything in my home life is changing
>Three friendos and I are going to rent a place for college. Great fun
>Absolute best friend that I've known for 8 years is moving away to NM around the time I leave for college because his gf's family is moving there, and this past year most of his ties with his family have been cut off due to step dad
>Usually once or twice a month I reminisce about how great my childhood was. Ed Edd n Eddy style childhood. Pokemon, vidya, old friends, events. Even my early teens, playing vidya like Halo 3, Bad Company 2, and when I was a little boy playing my Sega Genesis without a care in the world
>Now being 19, working a decent job with a good family and never had to worry about poverty. Parents helping me out with college, and getting to live with some of my good friends, I can't help but feel distraught, upset, and depressed over things.

I'm on the verge of tears writing this and it's strange because I'm known by my friend group as unphaseable and emotionless. I'm typically the emotional rock of the group. I talked about it with best friend and I think it's because I'll be in school again, so I can't just up and do anything like I'm used to. I can't just leave town for a day with a friend so easily because now plans complicate. I think I'm also scared of being tied down to a responsibility for the next four years. And with work, not being able to have time to spend with the friends I'll be living with, and continue having the good times I'm so used to. It's scaring the living shit out of me and I've never had emotional uproar like this before. Things like this have never bothered me before. What the fuck is wrong with me, why does nostalgia associate with sadness for me, and how do I healthily process this?