girls of /adv/, do you ever go through this or is it just me?
>at our couple-friends house
>sitting around in front of fire drinking
>ash flies high up on my boyfriends jeans (mid thigh)
>the girl dating our friend touches my boyfriends leg to bat off the ash
or
>playing beer pong on new years with friends
>same girl is wearing a spaghetti strapped sundress
>walks up to my boyfriend
>turns around and holds up her hair
>and asks him to fix her bra strap
or
>sitting around playing drinking games
>periodically go through stints of my boyfriend going back and forth with quips and jabs with this girl
>while they both ignore their respective significant others
>who just sit there watching them joke around with each other
>in silence
>waiting for them to remember they aren't fucking each other
...am I being ridiculous or..
>>16764034
if you're saying that he ignores you when he is with this girl, then its a red flag, its looks like they're low key flirting with each other and you should keep an eye on him if he becomes more intimate with her.
if you're with bf for less than 3-4 months, just give up and break up.
if you're with bf longer than that, tell him that you mind him acting like that around girls who act like that
So, she prevented him from being set on fire, asked for a hand with an uncomfortable clothing issue, and converses on friendly terms in public.
...Yes, if that's all you have, you are being ridiculous.
>>16764043
Whens the last time a single ash, extinguished by the time it lands on someones clothes, ACTUALLY caught them on fire?
Whens the last time your SO was asked to handle someone ELSES lingerie complications?
And whens the last time your SO completely ignored you for another person? The tension in the air is painfully obvious, to everybody. Her boyfriend looks at me like "Are you going to say something here?" every single time.
>>16764040
Been with him for 4 years now. I've talked to him about it, multiple times. It still happens. I got to the point where I dont even want to hang out with them anymore.
is it only with that particular girl or he doesn't mind when other girls flirt with him as well?
They are deeply in love, you can't prevent two people born for each other to connect.
>>16764063
I think we have different definitions of what "flirting" is. I think it's this kind of shit, he seems to think this is what you do when you're trying to be friends with a girl.
And he refuses to make friends with guys. Says he cant open up to them. But its this particular girl for now. In October, he talked to this other chick he knew from HS on FB and snapchat, like nonstop. So much that he ignored me to talk to her. On date night. Taking a face selfie in a McDonalds bathroom while I'm waiting with the food outside wondering what the fuck hes doing in there.
>16764071
What got my attention about THAT chick was all of a sudden, he wanted to start working out.
>>16764071
why don't you do the same with her bf
clean ash off his dick ask him to fix your bra
see how your bf and girl react
>>16764081
I would if I didn't hate him with a passion. He's a cruel, vain narcissist and everyone knows I feel that way. At first I felt sorry for her, because she admits he's been getting meaner (i.e. they're coming out of the honeymoon phase and hes being himself). I figured she must be starved for any kind of niceness from a guy. But the ash thing was too much, even for that excuse.
>>16764060
Well, it's basic courtesy to immediately assist someone when a burning item lands on them. And asking for assistance with a bra strap is about as inept as a come-on could possibly be.
As for the last time my SO talked with someone like I wasn't there? Currently. It's actually not a problem when you're not paranoid.
>>16764094
Do it anyway, or flirt with someone else. An eye for an eye. I can predict he'll get angry at you immediately. Talk about double standards
The most stupid advice is "flirt with someone else",in my opinion.Don't behave like him. Just tell him that the way he interacts with that girl perturbs you and see what he will do. If he loves you he will stop flirting, but if he keeps doing it then i have bad news for you.
>>16764116
In his defense, he has curbed a couple of things after our first talk. She tried to do the same thing on a camping trip around New Years and he put his hands up and looked at me, so she was like "Oh" and went to her BF to do it instead. But it just gets under my skin.
The ignoring thing wouldn't be as big of a problem if we all weren't so socially awkward. When theres a lull in the conversation, her boyfriend resorts to choosing one person to be the butt of all the jokes for the rest of the night basically. The last night this happened, I got that particular honor and everyone just kept cracking jokes about me messing up a simple math calculation in my head (because we were all insanely drunk and high and she started throwing out decimals so no one could figure out how many drinks went to who).
Maybe I'm just over-sensitive because of all the context. Y'all are right, in any other scenario this would be easy to write off as "being friendly". Idk.
>>16764068
BE NICE
>>16764147
i've seen this behaviour, because i know girls like this. basically, she's an attention-whore who gets off on other girls boyfriends wanting her, even if she herself doesn't want to date them. BF is definitely enjoying it.
like someone else said, if he values your relationship he'll stop for your sake, if he doesn't, well, at least you know where you stand.
I've seen this before. My SO had a best friend that was a girl, and she pulled similar things with him. The difference is he never reciprocated.
Originally I thought oh this is just how their friendship is, and I'm fairly new in his life so I'm just not used to it. Turned out she was in love with him. It was great to find out I wasn't crazy that she was flirting, and purposely excluding me in conversations and activities.
Talk to him, and express how she makes you uncomfortable with how she acts around him.
>>16764228
>>16764240
These make me sad now. I was hoping that she'd be cool, not like we'd be friends but that she wouldn't be doing petty shit like this. But it really is like I said, we haven't known her for long. It just sucks to suddenly realize that your bf is getting off on it too. Like if he does this with her and with the other girl from Oct, who is he thinking of when he's with me? Is he there 100% or is he wishing I was someone else? The whole thing fucking sucks, and now I'm literally starting to lose sleep over it.
>>16764564
It's comforting to hear that it isn't just her behaving this way though. I guess. I don't know many females so its hard for me to gauge what "normal" is, both from females and from what a healthy friendship would look like.
>>16764564
oh wow how cute, babbys first failed relationship
maybe if you weren't such a bore your bf would pay more attention to you and not some other girl that is clearly more attractive and interesting to him when you're both around
and since you let him continue the shenanigans he thinks its okay, because why wouldn't it be? You would have surely said something if it wasn't. But you haven't. So obviously to him it doesn't bother you, he's not a mind reader
Sounds like some gradeschool going into highschool shit tbqh family
>>16764603
Awww babbys first thread. It's almost like you haven't read any of these posts, like you're talking out of your ass. So I'm boring, ugly, and I deserve to be treated like shit. Thanks for contributing, I won't keep you from your MRA moonlighting.
>>16764034
My friends gf touches my legs all the time, and me hers. ;^)
>>16764656
Sure sounds like I'm right then.
Nah, your boyfriend is just a classless dick.
>>16764071
Looks like you're just going to have to learn to accept that your just another grill in his irl harem anime and might not even be best grill in it.
>>16764071
>And he refuses to make friends with guys. Says he cant open up to them.
redflag. abort abort abort.
>>16764673
I was about to say this as well. That's almost more of a red flag than some playful flirtation.
Also, your bf is sort of a bitchboy if he doesn't realize this girl is just using him to make her bf jealous/fluff her own ego. A little flirtation can be healthy for an LTR, but it sounds like he's making a fool of himself.
>>16764071
>cant open up to guys
Translates to
>I like to flirt and keep my options open ;3, its just a friendship I swEARR
It's the same fucking thing as a girl who has only guy friends and claims that "girl r 2 bitchy to hang out with!!1" these people are chronic cheaters and victim players.
As an example OP let's assume you say you don't like this behavior. You've told him it before and he obviously doesn't respect you enough to stop, so if he ever DOES cheat he will proceed to turn it around on you and claim that you pushed him away with your paranoia and suspicion and that it's really YOUR fault he cheated. People like this are trash, break up OP.
>>16764147
>lifted his hands and looked at you
I hope you know this is a red flag. He basically said "Hey I would love to, but she's here right now!" He could have told her no and actually had some balls but really just told her "if my girlfriend wasn't here right now I would love to touch your lingerie"
>>16764147
Nah, your whole friend group sounds like a bunch of dysfunctional faggots. It doesn't even seem like you like them.
Friends can give each other a jab once in a while, but you don't just gang up on somebody and rip on them all night.
And I'd be seriously ashamed if I was friends with your bf. A little flirtation can spice up a relationship, but he's letting this girl make a fool of him. He sounds like the most contemptible kind of pussy.
