How do I get over my special snowflake complex /adv/?
>>16628585
stop making threads about yourself.
>>16628594
First time I made a thread here
If you have a tumblr delete it immediately. It always works.
>>16628770
Nah, I've always had the complex, I only realized it a year ago. Also, my tumblr is only pictures of trees and snow and the likes, no radical feminist/angsty teenager shit
>>16628585
They say a reason from pretentious action is a feeling of inferiority of insecurity of identity because of inadequate representation (I.e. the artist who never made it).
I think the best way to deal with it is by putting your nose to the grindstone and really individualizing yourself. Obviously you want more out of life, it would be laughable to stay complacent in a society that has more to offer.
Just deal with it and try to make something of yourself until the pressure cracks your skull open.
>>16628770
This should fix it.
>>16628585
>Making a thread for attention
>How do l get over myseIf and my need for attention?
CouId you be any more of a faggot? ProbabIy not.
>>16628777
Mhm I don't think that's the case. My parents, teachers, etc. always told me that I was special, so I've always lived in that 'reality' and it's just very hard to shake that off when you do really differ in your interests and behaviour from the majority of people. Like how to change 'special/better' into 'slightly different but not better'. I don't really know how to explain it better.
>>16628781
How do you ask for help without also asking for attention?
Build intorspection. Get to know yourself.
What do you think, what was in your life that lead to you developing this?
>>16628793
Spoiler alert :every single parent and every single teacher, tells every single kid that. You're not special. I hope to hell I'm not the first to tell you that.
>>16628809
Thanks sherlock, it's not like I tell myself that everyday. But it's not enough to get rid of the underlying feeling that I still am fucking special and I want to get rid of it.
>>16628814
You know you're nothing, and you're here hoping someone wiII Iie to you and teII you that you ARE something.
>You're not and we aII know it
/thread
>>16628585
We need more info to answer your question.
>>16628814
But you do. You started a thread asking how to shake that mentality. Step one ; don't start every day remembering when mommy told you your diaper was a pot of gold and teacher was wrong when when you were told to stop eating crayons.
>>16628821
Honestly, I'm not. I hate myself for being like this, and I want to fix it, but I don't know how. Rational thinking alone isn't working.
>>16628822
Ask what you want to know.
>>16628836
Please be more vague in any future threads. It's easy to give advice that way.
Help me!
>explain how.
You tell me.
>...
Get it?
>>16628793
Realize that everyone is special in their own way. People are different, with different interests and capabilities. People who love you tell you that you are special because they want you to stop being afraid of that you are different from others because it is normal and everyone is different from others somewhat, and use the abilities and interests you have to find happiness and respect and admiration from others.
Problems start if you think that because you are different, you are also better and bigger than others because that leads to entitled bitch issues. The reason for this problem is that you are being judgemental and you only recognize your own speciality, not others. Get to know people and be more percieving and less judgemental.
>>16628836
>special snowflake complex
Why do you think you have a special snowflake complex?
>>16628881
Because deep down I feel/think I'm special, even though I know it's bullshit.
>>16628888
What evidence do you have that you are special?
If none, remind yourself of that always when you feel you are special.
>>16628888
Well we are all special in our own way. We all have our own skills, talents, hobbies, interests, strengths, weaknesses, etc. Embracing these differences is not an issue. Constantly showing off may be a problem.
>>16628893
Well my life/choices/interests/behaviour certainly aren't average, nor will they ever be, and this is why it's so hard to get rid of I think. But I also know that they don't make me better or different (don't know another word for it) than anyone else. The problem is that my rational thoughts aren't coming through or something.
>>16628906
I'm not showing off, and I never found it a problem to be 'different'. But for example, when I see someone who acts the same as I do (or close, or likes the same thing, etc.), then I unconsiously think "but it's not the same, because when I do the thing, it's different/special".
>>16628909
>Well my life/choices/interests/behaviour certainly aren't average, nor will they ever be
That's kind of vague. Please elaborate on that.
>>16628922
Can't elaborate much on that without posting a whole autobiography, it is just what it is. I grew up quite isolated, and developed interests different from the norm and thus have always been an outcast (not the lonely frogposter type, my social skills are fine).
>>16628930
Post a maximum of 20 sentences to describe your background and we'll see about that.
>>16628939
It would be impossible to write it down so other people can judge it fairly, nor do I have any desire to put it online. Just accept that it is. I'm an outcast, someone who doesn't 'belong' to the majority. I'm sure you know someone like that and can confirm that someone like that is a lot more 'different' than the average person.
>>16628909
If you truly are not average in your life/choices/interests/behaviour, you have to accept the fact that you are truly different in your life/choices/interests/behaviour. What you need to do is learn to respect others for their choice of life/choices/interests/behaviour. As long as you respect others and don't think of yourself as some demigod, you will be fine.
>>16628949
It's very difficult to answer your question then. But surely you are not THAT special? With more than 7 billion human beings on earth, there must be someone who shares a certain trait as you.
You need to join some clubs, particularly AA or Testicular Cancer group sessions. Sleep less and show up to work and half ass it. Once your boss is aware of your lack of effort then you need to approach him and tell him that you want to be made redundant, paid out with full benefits, otherwise you'll tell the authorities he physically abused you. Then, punch yourself and cause a massive scene in your office. He will definitely give you what you asked for then. After this you need to leave your gas on in your apartment or house. Let the place blow up. Then you can start a group where at night you go into a out-of-city-bar and fight. You fight with no rules. But the rules of the club is strict. Strict enough that if anyone talks about it they will be excluded and even threatened by all involved members. Only then will you get rid of your special snowflake complex.
You're just narcissistic with sense of grandiose. Nothing more, nothing less. You just need to get your teeth kicked in (figuratively but even literally would do the trick).
>>16628959
I accept it, and I have no problems with being an outcast, nor have I ever had them. And I can respect others. I know how stupid it is, but I can't get rid of the demigod feeling.
>>16628968
Oh yes, there are many. But when I do something, it's different. And when someone, hypothetically, does exact the same thing, they must be different or special as well. Or well, that's the thought I can't get rid of, no matter how many times I see the stupidity.
>>16628976
>>16628983
Feel free to fight me, I really do need that.
>>16628985
The demigod feeling almost always come from insecurity. You know you are different, you made different choices, but you don't want to confront others with your differences. That's why you avoid them and feel superior. It's a defense mechanism. Learn to accept yourself with your differences.
>>16629000
Or it's because I'm a spoiled bitch who needs to get kicked in the face? Because I confront people all the time with them and I'm definitely a nuisance.
>>16629005
Or you can wait til' you're 30 and no man wants to marry a stuck up, my-shit-don't-stink-i-am-so-much-better-than-everyone-else bitch. That will send you down to earth faster than a punch in the face will.
>>16629005
No, you don't confront others. Confrontation is open ended. You just want to prove that you are right and they are wrong. You don't give them the chance to prove that they are right and you are wrong. This is insecurity and a defense mechanism. If you get kicked in the face, you will only feel injustice and that the other is shit. Narcissism can't be overcome with force. You need to learn to accept and respect others and yourself.
Please give one example when you confronted others from your life.
Were you spoiled as a child?
How old are you?
Do you have any meaningful friendships, relationships gf/bf?
>>16629015
Leaving home when I was 16 after finishing my last 3 years of school in 1 year was a confrontation I think?
>>16629016
Not materialistic, actually grew up in a forest in the middle of nowhere and my dad is/was homeless/jobless most of the time. I just never had to put effort in something. I'm 18 now, I broke up a few months ago with my bf but we're still good friends. Other than that, because I always move a lot, I never have long friendships.
>>16629023
>>18
>>Naive
Yawn
Nothing to see here, move along
>>16629031
hurr durr young people don't deserve advice because they're naive
they realise that and thus ask for advice on how to not be naive
>>16629023
>Leaving home when I was 16 after finishing my last 3 years of school in 1 year was a confrontation I think?
No, that's a proof for yourself that you are great.
>>16629040
Why would that make me great? I simply did what I wanted to do at the time, which is, nothing special.
>>16629023
From what you have told us, you have a LOT more life experience than your average 18 yo. Thinking that you actually more capable than them is normal because you actually are. Just don't judge others and categorize permanently because they are not as experienced or capable as you are. Respect them, and use your experience and abilities to help them in life. Always look for a challange and look for opportunities to use what you are good at for something.
>>16628992
Sure, it would be a pleasure. Getting rid of entitled faggots is a service to everyone.
Where do you live?
>>16629049
Yes, but you purposefully chose something different than others because you thought you could do it while others could not.
>>16629050
And people telling me stuff like this is the reason I can't get over it.
>>16629053
Northern europe, probably not even close.
>>16629056
Not at all. Going to school and living where I lived simply made me unhappy, so I left. Nothing more to it.
>>16629062
>And people telling me stuff like this is the reason I can't get over it
No, if you don't accept the facts you will never get over it. You will only hate yourself for things you are not at fault of.
Having experience and abilities is good. Using them for selfish reasons is bad. Use what you have in a way that benefits everyone. Don't try to push yourself down when evidence shows that you truly are doing things others can't or won't. Someone has to be on top, accept that role and be good at it. Just don't push others down as well, instead help them to be better and learn where your limits are.
If you push yourself down, that's communist style equality, that never leads to any good. If you push others down, that's bitchness.
>>16629062
>Northern europe, probably not even close.
Germany, so we could arrange something.
How good are you at wrestling?
>>16629070
Ok, but then where do you confront others?
>>16629081
Pretty bad probably, never been in a real fight. If you stand still I could 360 kick you in the face tho
>>16629086
My mother in confronting her with the fact that her daughter isn't going to finish school nicely, study at university, get a job, get married, etc.
>>16629091
Then what are you going to do? What motivates you in life?
>>16629098
I don't know really. What's keeping me alive is mainly the curiosity, that there are always new things to discover I think. I might study astronomy or join the army the following years, but that's about it for my future plans.
>>16629104
You're very independent and an interesting person. This can be a good thing or bad. As long as you can get your life together and have a meaningful relationship with people around you, you should accept being what you are and live your life with it.
>>16629089
Sounds easy enough, where should we meet?
>>16629115
I appreciate your advice and stuff, but a special snowflake complex is something I can't accept from myself.
>>16629116
>yeah actually meeting up with random people from 4chan seems like a rad idea
>>16629120
>yeah actually meeting up with random people from 4chan seems like a rad idea
You wanted to get your face kicked it, what worse could happen?
>>16629124
Getting your face kicked by 5 niggers who then proceed to rape you sounds pretty bad
>>16629120
>I appreciate your advice and stuff, but a special snowflake complex is something I can't accept from mysel
This is not a complex, that's what I'm talking about. It's independence. It's a complex if you don't follow it through with actions. Psychologists say that as long as it's not interfereing with your life and you can function normally it's not a disorder. The only problem with this is that this kind of behavior and worldview is extremely masculine so it may not fit you as a girl.
>>16629130
It would help with your special snowflake complex and overvaluation of yourself. No nigger though.
>>16629134
But if you have a certain mindset, it is sure to be found back in your actions
>>16629136
True, but I will undoubtably get in a fight once anyway.
>>16629155
>But if you have a certain mindset, it is sure to be found back in your actions
Yes, but if you have a happy and meningful life otherwise, it's not a complex, it's just your personal style. Don't be narcissistic and find a place for yourself.
>>16629161
But being a special snowflake is a fucking shite personal style
>>16629162
Not if you respect others, find things in common and you don't HAVE to always be a special snowflake just to be a special snowflake. If you do, that's insecurity and narcissism.
