Need relationship advice? Ask someone who has been in a stable relationship for 7 years anything. I answer everything to the best of my ability.
>>16612235
How do you determine if you're going too fast in a relationship?
>>16612250
Can you already feel the relationship getting boring? How long have you been together?
>>16612256
It's definitely not getting boring it's just that things have progressed physically suddenly. We've been talking for about a month now, but she recently got out of a 3.5 year relationship.
>>16612235
>Ask someone who has been in a stable relationship for 7 years anything.
I was in a stable relationship for 7.5 years. Then it ended. Bada bing, bada boom.
Are you the guy from the survey thread who's 'been in a relationship' since he was 13?
>>16612269
yeah, try to take some of her advances slowly. She wants to get back into things fast, but take it nice and slowly. Ease into it.
>>16612276
Well, I guess you aren't me then. Been together with her since 7th grade, now we share an apartment together near our college campus :^)
>>16612285
Yeah
>>16612269
Details?
>>16612303
She comes on strong as fuck though and it's incredibly difficult to resist. Should I tell her to ease up or should I stop giving in to her advances?
>>16612310
Oh boy. She really misses her old relationship, it seems. Play it cool, and tell her to ease up a bit. Don't give in, otherwise you might find yourself in a relationship that's become sex-centered and that's not good. Get to really know her
>>16612303
I'll let you have your thread and I'll spare you wisdom.
>>16612320
ok. Mind if I ask why it ended?
>>16612326
We were each others first, in everything, love, sex, experiences, romance, etc. We talked on the phone, everyday,for years, saw each other 1-3 times a week. Our sex life was good, connection was good, etc. Things were great for years, until about a month before the breakup. We talked less and less, saw each other less and less, she started acting different.
In that time she was using myspace, facebook, going to parties with her sister and sis's friends, started hanging out with guys. In essence, temptation led her away.
>>16612356
Dang, sorry bro...
Why would she do that? Makes no damn sense
>>16612310
Why did she leave her recent relationship?
Have you talked about what you want? Or has it just moved forward as is?
You've had some role it would seem in her leaving as well?
>>16612235
Guy from other thread here.
I'll just repost the OP here so you understand whats up.
I know this girl who's very attractive, she's smoking hot to me.
and I'm happy because she also feels the same about me.
Here's the bad part. She moved to another state recently. We're not officially dating anymore but we still talk to each other all the time.
So here's my problem.
I know she likes me, I know I like her, great. But the distance is going to make it too difficult to keep things going.
I can't see her in person anymore, or that I can't touch her or hold her, and she can't touch me or hold me.
But we are BOTH constantly talking about how we'd like to fuck and whenever we get horny for each other we do that.
It's going to end up driving me mad if I keep doing this, I'm not an obsessive or possessive person and I never have been, but the constant distance-teasing(made up term) and talking about doing cute things when we can't is going to end up driving me insane.
So, I'm going to do the right thing and at least be honest with her and tell her that I believe that our relationship if it continues as it has might be unhealthy, because it could result in a type of obsessiveness.
>>16612360
Why? Because temptation. She wanted to experience other dicks and things. Her sister and social media were the catalyst for her to be a harlot.
I thought I'd be with her forever, she thought the same at one point as well.
>>16612381
You're doing the right thing. Assess the situation. If you know there is no realistic way to continue your relationship, then just call it quits.
>>16612385
Well cheating whores deserve nothing but STDs. Find someone that deserves you anon. It's a disgusting feeling knowing how some females act today.
>>16612389
My fear is that she'll just want to "be friends" and end up talking to me, and she likes to come to me for advice and ventilate to me.
She REALLY likes me, she's obsessed with my looks, she thinks my voice is sexy, it's really gratifying of course to me.
If I tell her that I don't think it's healthy, she might agree with me but still keep messaging me, which might eventually lead to more flirting and shit like that.
That's my concern.
>>16612406
It's fine still being friends. But you can't let her get in the way of your relationships when you get a serious one. It's fine having friends who find you sexy as all hell. If she makes advances, just brush them aside. But in all seriousness, if she respects you at all, she'll stop when you get a girlfriend and if you have any respect for yourself and for your ladyfriend, then you won't flirt with her and you won't give in to her advances
>>16612397
She never cheated that I'm aware of. She was shopping around, partying before we broke up.
>Find someone that deserves you anon
Thanks for the kind words. Only if that could be.
>>16612418
You're right bro. I just wish I could keep things going with her. Too bad teleportation devices haven't been invented yet.
Thanks man.
>>16612427
Shopping around and flirting constitutes cheating for a lot of people
>Only if that could be.
Keep your head up. If some dumbass like me can find someone, I'm sure you can too
>>16612429
No problem bro
>>16612303
>>16612303
that's not a 7 year relationship, that's a childhood attachment that's continued into "adulthood" (your early twenties)
dont mislead the nice people
>>16612444
Childhood attachments don't last 7 years man
>>16612444
Don't be bitter, some people get really lucky with love man.
While others like me have to wait longer for the person we're meant for.
God willing, not too long.
My boyfriend is away on vacation with his family. Is there a reason why he doesn't check his phone before he sleeps?
We usually say good morning and goodnight but he hasn't been doing that and he doesn't message me before bed. I always check my phone before bed for texts... just seems odd he doesn't.
>>16612449
Amen to that.
>>16612457
it's possible he has no signal or shit wifi. Where did he go? because I went to hawaii with parents before heading off to college and couldn't get more than one bar of cellular data for some odd reason. i remember because I couldn't return texts and my gf thought I had died
>>16612446
you're still a child. you're 20. your brain isnt fully developed. attachments formed as a child are often much more powerful and addictive than those formed in adulthood because the brain develops around the experience. i would know, im also 20.
some people really do fall in love with their middle school sweetheart and marry them. i hope that you're one of them, truly.
my point is that you haven't been through seven years of a relationship with an adult and as an adult with a fully developed brain. your lack of dating experience as an adult and otherwise also disqualifies you from giving advice on relationships. for all we know, you could be a co-dependent couple with very poor boundaries, or other problems that you dont see as problems because you have always been with the same person and have zero perspective.
Are you married, OP?
>>16612513
He's 20.
>>16612516
lel 'nuff said. abandoning thread.
>>16612506
fair points. But the fact that I have been able to make a relationship last while going through the most stressful times of our lives gives some merit to my advice
>>16612517
Yeah, he's been in a 'relationship' since he was 13.
>>16612521
>stressful
Elaborate. High school and starting college don't count, by the way.
>>16612528
I don't know what you did in high school, but i worked over the summers, took 10 AP tests, took both the SAT and ACT and right now in college I'm getting ready for the bulldog course this summer.
>>16612534
*10 classes, 13 tests and a varsity sport
>>16612506
lol.
You sad man.
Just gotta try to shit on everything don't you.
A man who is in a good relationship with his woman wants to share advice, let him.
>>16612538
It's 4chan. Faggots will be faggots and shit on everything. At least someone is standing up for op. OP, stop taking the bait
>>16612538
It's like one of the elder Dugger girls giving us advice on marriage, when they're 20 and have been married for 6 months. Gimme a break
>>16612538
youre projecting. ive been watching too much House and it's rubbing off on me. also, im a female and i'm not hindering OP from posting, am i?
>>16612521
or you're both needy enough to stay with each other despite whatever problems you have. the fact that you took so many AP classes in highschool and both tests points to obsessive perfectionism, which is a pattern that would be mirrored in your personal life as well. ie: trying so hard to make your dream relationship persevere indefinitely despite evidence of complete incompatibility
>>16612552
Sure he might not have every perspective, nobody does.
But he does know something that a lot of people on 4chan don't know.
Which is knowing someone, and caring about someone on a personal level for years.
OP probably has held his girl in his arms while she cried. They probably know each others secrets.
He knows the problems that a girl might have and how emotional they can get.
Have you done those things?
OP has perspective, so let him share his.
>>16612552
kek
im glad you see my point as well
>>16612534
What's your point? What are these stressors that have affected your relationship so much and make you qualified to give advice on relationships despite the fact that you're only 20 years old?
>>16612538
Are you seriously going to take relationship advice from a 20 year old?
>>16612568
I took that much stuff because i wanted to be damn sure I got into my dream college. And we aren't needy. We're both lucky enough to know that our parents have both the want and the means to support us financially no matter what, even though we are both on scholarship and have jobs. We just enjoy each other's company, pure and simple. Well except for when she hands my ass to me on a silver platter while we play CSGO. Any other questions?
What do you think about going for single moms as a late 20s male who doesn't have much going for him? I'm not actually going for them in particular but it seems like every cute girl I talk top have a 2year old or a 4 year old. I don't hate kids but how do you get to know the woman without letting her kids sway you.
>>16612573
>>16612576
OP has been in a goddamn relationship for 7 years and he actually lives with his SO. What have you done?
>>16612580
There's really nothing unremarkable about a girl in her late 20s with a toddler. How do you even know they're looking to date, instead of just focusing on their kid?
>>16612580
I'd say go for it. But don't make them another fucking baby. If all you're looking for is sex of course. For an actual stable relationship, they might want you to have a job to support their kid...
>>16612581
>thinking that a 13 year old is capable of having an a fully fledged relationship
You've got to be shitting me.
>>16612552
>>16612570
>samefagging this hard
>>16612578
You know nothing, let it go.
>>16612587
Thanks for bumping senpai. What do you mean fully fledged? If you mean living with that person, the I'll be going into my third year with her in march. But if you mean from a purely 'love' point of view, a relationship based purely off of immature 'attractions' wouldn't last seven years
>>16612585
I'm 28, the few girls were 22, 23 and 24. They may not have been looking to date but when something good comes along they know it right?
>>16612586
I have a job that will only get better. I could afford the kid but why do I want to? Not just looking for sex anymore.
>don't make them another baby
did you mean don't get them pregnant or to not treat her like a child.
>>16612591
nice try, newfriend
>>16612569
Yeah, what problems OP and his gf must've faced in his early relationship years
That time when his gf got a 4/10 on her French quiz
That time when her Neopet got mutated into a not-cute Neopet
When her mom wouldn't buy her Taylor Swift tickets
When his mom wouldn't let him buy League of League currency
>>16612601
He's just trolling you.
>>16612594
nice comeback. I know a helluva lot more than you though, that's for sure.
>>16612603
>needing to prove it
>>16612606
yeah I know. I shouldn't be taking the bait. Oh well
>>16612581
I'm 23 and in a two and a half year relationship with my best friend of 5 years. We don't live together just yet because I'm finishing school while they've just started their career properly in the last year or so. I'd say we're pretty strong as a couple but I don't feel qualified as a relationship expert or anything. What does this have to do with OP? He's been in a relationship since he was a literal child, you can't compare our relationships and say they're equal
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>>16612601
A 13 year old isn't capable of having the same relationship as an adult. You don't have enough experience of adult relationships to give proper advice.
>>16612601
your post is illogical and it doesnt prove or disprove anything at all.
you're being defensive because you're afraid that your relationship is actually just the result of spending your formative years with someone. youre afraid of being alone because youve never been alone, and that alone (hah) not to mention your complete lack of relationship experience, would make you cling to a relationship with no real value. what if you really dont love eachother, youre just together because you dont know any better
>>16612613
I never claimed to give relationship as an expert. I'm a soon to be marine officer and I would probably give more valuable advice in a few years, but I feel I can still give advice that may be useful to someone. Isn't that the point of /adv/? To try and help someone?
>>16612620
>>16612623
>number of posters stays at 11
>>16612623
We've broken up
>>16612613
i think the guy is saying that OP might have some advice useful for a virgin
>>16612625
Then why make a thread instead of just answering people's problems? Why advertise that you've 'been in a relationship' for 7 years? You certainly felt that you were in a better position than most people here to answer questions, which is what I was getting at.
>>16612628
This is some extreme samefagging... OP is still taking the bait
>>16612628
>people can't post more than once in a thread
>>16612602
>>16612580
thoughts anyone?
>>16612650
Yea, you clearly want OP to feel like his relationship is inadequate because you somehow are triggered by his luck in love.
>>16612638
How? The last time he could fully relate to a virgin was 7 years ago. Since then, he's been with this girl. He has no idea what it's like to be in their position
>>16612633
did you reply to the wrong post?
>>16612625
your post was misleading and intended to give an air of paternalistic wisdom
>>16612654
I'm content in my relationship. I'm sorry you feel like it's impossible that more than one person disagrees that OP is in a good position to give advice.
He can't really give advice to anyone except people who were lucky enough to marry/live in sin with their high school sweethearts. He has no idea about any one else's experiences.
OP has never even been on a date with a woman. Think about that.
>>16612653
I think you should make your own thread. OP can't give you advice on your situation because he knows nothing about your position, and the thread's gone to shit anyway
ITT: My dumb self biting epic levels of bait.
I need to sleep, have to drive back home tomorrow. Thanks for bumping the thread at least?
>>16612653
no fuck you im talking about OP
>>16612655
what? i think the idea was that he'd be more qualified to talk about relationships than a virgin NEETbeard. if you hadnt noticed, theres a lot of those on the site. so in that respect, OP could probably give okay advice on how to prepare for losing virginity. (the right answer is, dont worry about it. just take a good shower before, and enjoy the experience.)
>>16612666
nice get satan. But I actually had to take my gf out on a date to ask her out. Yeah we already knew each other but technically...
>>16612672
It doesn't matter. OP is going to bed, probably going to get some pussy while the rest of us continue to shit on this thread
>>16612672
>what? i think the idea was that he'd be more qualified to talk about relationships than a virgin NEETbeard. if you hadnt noticed, theres a lot of those on the site. so in that respect, OP could probably give okay advice on how to prepare for losing virginity. (the right answer is, dont worry about it. just take a good shower before, and enjoy the experience.)
So he could have made a thread called 'how to prepare for losing your virginity'. Instead, he made a thread making him seem like he knows anything and everything about relationships, which he actually knows very little about, since he hasn't been through what the vast majority of people go through. I don't disagree that he's in a good position to talk about some aspects of dating and relationships, but he gave the impression that he knew anything and everything about dating at 20 years old because he's been in a relationship since he was 13
>>16612474
He has Wifi and internet is perfect where he is staying (in a suburban home at his grandmothers home) and still, he just doesn't read my messages or reply to them.
>>16612675
You mean when you were 13, and your mommy had to drive you to the movie theater and sit in the back, and then drive you home?
>>16612675
So all you know is how to ask a 13 year old girl out. You could make a thread targeted at all the pedos here
>>16612675
>woman
sorry champ, being 13 isnt being a woman
>>16612683
yeah no kidding f.a.m.
he even used an eharmony pic in the OP to give the illusion that he knows about the happily ever after and can help people towards it. i agree hes not entirely ignorant, but being with one person for your whole life makes it impossible to get real experience with dating and all the messy tangles and personality things that happen... definitely no guru
>>16612692
That would be a good thread. There are a lot of pedos on 4chan in general, but also on /adv. A lot of them will also say, "I'm not a pedophile, I'm a ephinophile" or whatever, so OP would be perfect for that
Want to break up with gf cause she's self destructive and doesn't want to change, but I'm too scared to go through with it because I've been hiding my feelings and as far as she knows, everything is going dandy. I don't want her to hurt herself or something because of me. What do? I feel stuck
>>16613411
Just do it
How do I get over the hope that my ex who broke up with me two days ago will find his way back to me some day? I know I have to move on, I even know it's probably better we would have had to compromise a lot, but I'm a very emotional person once I open up and it's so hard to even forget about it. I wake up literally feeling sick to my stomach as soon as I remember the reality.
>>16612235
so there's this girl i met on 4chan, no kidding.
we were texting for a month every day until we decided to meet up in person
she stayed a couple of days at my house, she just broke up with her bf of 3 years though
we had sex albeit unplanned and for both of us it felt right.
we continued to meet each other every 3 weeks or so for a couple of days, because of distance.
we always managed to overcome the days until our next meetup.
and now, days before christmas she broke up saying she doesn't want a new relationship.
did we go too fast?
she told me she developed feelings for me and that she could've seen us in a relationship.
