21 year old, getting married 1 semester before graduation from college, in 2016, and working 2 jobs right now and preparing for a nice salary job when I graduate.
Mother won't acknowledge that I'm engaged, won't acknowledge the wedding, says she loves the girl but doesn't think I'm "acting like a man enough" to be married and says I "would be an embarrassment to her friends and family" to say that I got married.
I said that if she didn't acknowledge it, I couldn't invite her. She said that's fine.
I feel broken.
What do I do?
The marriage is all set to happen and I can pay for it because it is very small and my fiancee and I are both very happy about it.
Your fiancee seems very happy about cutting dat little throat of his, yes.
She is right, you are too young to get married, especially while working two jobs to even afford a ceremony.
It is embarassing when you set yourself up for failure. How long have you known your gf?
>>16601708
ATTENTION?
>>16601708
Long enough.
Regardless, I am doing this. I am going through with the ceremony and will be perfectly fine.
I am concerned about my mother. So I should just play along with her that it's "not real" and go through all the motions of getting married and living together and starting a family anyway?
We're all set on everything, and my mother was supportive until 2 days ago. Then she starts shouting out of nowhere and this comes out.
>>16601703
That's just a stock image I found. it's from some other thread.
>>16601696
>What do I do?
On the one hand, statistically she is right. Divorce rates for people under the age of 25 are astronomical. Young relationships are supposed to end because that's how we learn what we want as adults. Neither of you are adults yet, so from your mom's perspective you are both children making a foolish mistake, and I tend to agree with her on this.
On the other hand an important part of being a parent (as I am one myself) is to let your child make their mistakes and their own decisions and be supportive but not overbearing, even when you know its going to blow up in their face.
Its really easy as a parent to angry and frustrated when you see your child making the same mistakes you made but there comes a certain point when you have to choose between having a relationship with your child and keeping your pride.
It seems that your mother has decided to keep her pride, which is an unfortunate position because no matter whether or not I thought it was a mistake I'd want to be there for my daughter's wedding.
I would rather be around for my daughter's mistakes then not around at all, so sometimes I hold my tongue when I think she's being an idiot, which is honestly what children are supposed to do. Its how they become adults.
Your mother has made her decision, and although you are still an adolescent, legally you are an adult and you have every right to make this decision. Whether or not she finds a way to live with your decision is up to her but if you value having any sort of relationship with your mom at all you'll take the high road and tell her you love her and that when she's ready to accept the decisions you've made your wife and you will be ready to accept her back into your lives.
That's all you can do. If you don't give a shit then I guess you go your separate ways. That's all.
I'll pay a thousand dollars if I can attend your wedding and hookup with one of the bridesmaid.
>>16601720
>hasn't ever adulted
>thinks he's ready to settle down
Please don't have kids in the first 5 years. This has divorce written all over it and I don't want you stuck with child support on top of alimony.
>>16601720
If long enough is shorter than 3 years and you guys have never lived on your own together or gone through all the serious talks about what you want in life then you really need to listen to your mom. Women can smell problems, and your mom may know something about your gf than you do. If she had a bachelorette party and invited your mom, she'd be the first to snitch on the stripper sex.
>>16601696
Just remember that your mother will always love you unconditionally and that she knows best even when it seems like she doesn't.
>>16601746
We have. We are going to be fine, we are doing everything well and right.
My problem is my mother, my marriage itself is fine.
>>16601732
Fuck off. We are well prepared.
>>16601767
If everything is so great and can possibly never go wrong, why are you here for advice for? As painful as this may be to hear, you're still a kid at 21, whatever you think you know about life will be flipped upside down on its head every 5 years.
I didn't come here to ask for advice about whether to get married. I came to ask about how to ask about how to deal with my mother.
My father disagrees with her.
>>16601772
I'm here for advice for dealing with my mother.
It means a lot to me that she acknowledge my marriage, especially when I'm working so hard to make it happen.
>>16601696
Bros don't let bros get married until at least 30
