So I like this one woman at work very much. We're both single, and I'm fairly certain the feelings are mutual.
However due to the nature of our work, we very rarely get any peace, there's always someone else around and I'm finding it very hard to find a good opportunity to actually ask her out. I also have to admit that the few little opportunities there have been, the right words just haven't come out.
But then I thought, we actually have our work phones. Will I look like a complete pussy if I don't ask her out face to face but actually send her a txt asking her for coffee after work?
I would have to send it from a phone that's number she probably doesn't have saved on hers, so I would have to identify myself on the txt also.
I would prefer dealing this face to face, but shit ain't easy.
Girls, will you think the guy is a useless pussy if he sends you a txt instead of coming to you and saying it face to face? Would it make you reconsider your feelings (we are gonna assume in this scenario my perception about her feelings is true) about a guy you like, or may I even dare, have a crush on?
Oh and inb4 don't shit where you eat.
Stop overthinking this, you're just spinning your wheels. Get her alone and ask her out. Wait for her to leave work and ask her in the parking lot. Don't repeat verbatim anything anyone here says, it'll sound rehearsed and fake. No one likes fake.
Ask her for any low pressure setting where it's just you and her. The message is you're interested in her outside of a work setting.
"Asking her out" just means asking her to hang out with you. If you find out you don't like her as much as you thought you did then you just continue hanging out as friends. Don't make it a big deal and just ask her to do something with you.
>>16593306
Yea I'm not asking for anyone to tell the words I should "repeat" to ask her out, that's not the part I'm worried about.
I just want to know if texting my question for her is a valid option. Or does it suck balls.
Oh and btw to be in the parking lot around same time is going to take quite a bit of organizing. That is going to feel very forced and definitely not my first option.
>>16593299
There are always several guys vying for my attention when I'm single. I'd only be interested in those who have the balls to flirt with my in person. I'm an outgoing person and want any potential boyfriend to be as well.
>>16593324
Texting is a shit option here. Figure a way to ask her privately. Not the bathroom. Preferably during or at the end of a round of flirting. The heavier, the better.
>>16593343
>>16593334
Well fuck, not the answers I hoped for, but I'm probably gonna ditch the texting idea and hope I find my balls somewhere so I can actually ask her face to face. Probably wont tho.
>>16593388
I'm legit a little angry at you. Why can't you find a pair? What's the worst case scenario? She says no?
>>16593394
I'm little angry with me sometimes too. Whenever the situation arises I just go in to a state of inner panic.
I know it's not a big deal and nothing truly bad can happen, but it doesn't seem to help to know the facts while my feelings are blowing this out of proportion.
DESU I've never made any advances towards a girl sober.
>>16593401
I meant to type "To be honest", not this DESU anime hentai manga weeaboo faggotry.
>>16593401
This, for our current purpose, is pointless whining. You're scared. We don't care why because it doesn't matter. Take a leap of faith and ask her out. If she says no, you need to believe it doesn't matter. If she says yes, this also doesn't matter.
Nothing really matters because there's always something else coming along down the pipe.
>>16593413
I know all of this. Still my mouth doesn't open. My reasoning side of brain works and makes the right decisions, but my emotional side doesn't comply. Sorry about the whining, this simply is what is going on.
Thanks for replies to my original questions tho.
>>16593433
How do you expect to function in a relationship if you can't even properly formulate a coherent request for a date? This is absolute nonsense. Women want guys who are comfortable in their own skin and know how to communicate. You are neither, currently.
>>16593433
Force of will.
It's sort of like cliff diving. Everyone else is doing it, so you know it's safe. However, you can't do it because it's diving off a cliff. So you hang out by the edge for a while until you muster up the gump to jump. Then you jump and the first time is pants shit terrifying. Some poo comes out.
But the next time isn't as bad and it gets easier. Man up sally.
>>16593446
You might be right. I'm actually quite good at social interaction as long as it doesn't have a deeper meaning. ie. I'm generally quite liked at work and can make people laugh. But as soon as I should start making a real connection I get fucking scared.
I do have few very close friends, but those human relationships were built about 15 to 20 years ago as a kid.
I would like to have the chance to build something real tho. At least to try. I just don't know if the ship has sailed already.
>>16593470
You're good as long as there's no pressure. Don't fool yourself. I have no asvice but therapy. For now, fake it while you ask her out.
>>16593459
I kinda like your example because I'm a little bit of a adrenaline addict myself. It's not cliff diving but it's a dear hobby of mine and I actually sometimes scare myself afterwards thinking the dangerous shit I was up to again. But in the moment I don't fear death.
Still the exact opposite of comes true when it comes to social interaction like this one in this thread. Then I'm a pussy.
>>16593477
>You're good as long as there's no pressure.
The no pressure thing is how I have been trying to work this, I try to tell myself that there is no pressure. Worse I can do is be just another average chump that asked the pretty girl out but didn't quite make it. No pressure.
I hope it actually works at some point.
