How can I be sure that he loves me if we see each other so little? 3, 2, or 1 hours a day is 'usual'.
LDR here. We used to have like 8 hour long skype calls when we first got together. It was normal for us to spend all day together back then. Why has life gotten in the way so much? My last job, I got fired in October but managed to save up $1000 total. Now that I'm unemployed, I'm back to being a neet again while I take care of medical stuff and jobsearch. Meaning I'm going insane with boredom. When I had a job, I was miserable in different ways, yeah (such as never having enough time to myself, never getting enough sleep, ALWAYS BEING RUSHED, etc), but at least I wasn't BORED. I had a place to be and something to do.
Why am I not with you yet, lover? A thousand dollars isn't enough to move to you, really, but all I want is to be with you. Why am I not with you yet?
any comments or whatever are appreciated. maybe let me know of everything I have to do upon moving to a new state? I have a car. All of my possessions can fit into it.
>>16505955
>LDR here
You don't. LDRs aren't called not real relationships by many without a reason.
>>16505960
Well it's not my fault we met while playing a game we liked at the time. Not my fault he happened to live far away. I think in all my years of gaming, I've only met 1 person in the same state as me (Pennsylvania). The closest I've even known someone was from New Jersey. But said boyfriend is from Arizona
>>16505955
> 1-3 hours a day is 'usual'
> we see each other so little
You're super in love with him that seeing him everyday feels little to you.
Many other LDR would kill to have what you have.
OP, do you all not have a game plan about when you'll be moving, or at the very least set plans about the next time you'll visit?
When you have that kind of structure, even with the bullshit everyday life clouds you in, you shouldn't be feeling so insecure in your relationship. Set plans are what keep LDRs moving foward.
$1000 dollars isn't a good amount to move with, but it is way more than enough to pay for a plane ticket for one of you. You all should make plans to do so.
Now, if they can't manage life enough to make time for you/them to visit, that's when you should be feeling like you do now.
If you have SOMETHING to look forward to, you'll be a lot less bored.
>>16505955
I've seen people move cross country for less than $1000, but now doesn't really seem like the right time. Between your medical issues, and decreased interaction time due to one sided restrictions on time that aren't your own, this really doesn't seem like the ideal time to do so.
Try to focus on learning how to be content with living your own life. It cuts down on friction in relationships, LDR or not, when neither party feels shorted, ignored, or unwanted. Constant need of validation and attention from someone will inevitably make you resent them, and that doesn't lead to good things in a relationship.
>>16505964
>not my fault
>not my fault
No wonder you're neet and managed to get fired.
>>16506045
If you have SOMETHING to look forward to, you'll be a lot less bored
I agree. Sometimes he's so busy I can never find time to really talk. I hate that. To answer your question, we don't really have a concrete gameplan. Also in my original post I said I had a car, as in, I'm going to use it to drive to him. Getting the car was necessary burden to commute to my job. Getting rid of the car is not an option because it'd negatively affect my reputation and credit.
Gosh how do we even work on a gameplan? Please don't laugh but he's in his last year of school. We INTENDED for me to drive over to his state once he got a job and finished school. Even now he is trying to get a job but with school in the way it's hard to juggle shit. And he has no car. He has to walk to everything in the Arizona sun.
But then I suggested using my money to come over, get a job, find an apartment, maybe live in a hotel for a few days, maybe rely on his friends for help. His friends are my friends
>>16506070
That's a whole lot of judging without actually knowing the story. kek
I got fired because I brought in a doctor's note explaining I cannot stand or walk for long periods of time due to a congenital disability. Two hours later I was fired instead of being given any accommodation. All I would need to do is sit for 5 minutes and then continue working.
>>16506065
You are correct. I did not mean to drive over now. This is not the right time to do it.
>how to be content with living your own life
This is very hard. I live in bumfuck nowhere and it's hard to find anything captivating to even do, especially without pocket change to spend. Also I don't enjoy gaming anymore
>>16505955
LDR here. I could be your boyfriend, I'm going through the exact same thing with my girlfriend right now.
When we first got together we had 8 hour skype calls and now it's down to 2-4 hours a day. Thing is, 4 hours is still a quarter of your waking hours. When I get off a 10 hour shift in customer service I don't always want to be on skype for another 8 hours, and that has nothing to do with how much I love my partner, it's just a fuckton of time.
Shit anon you might be right. Just need to learn how to be content having a life of my own. /adv/ice on this?
>>16506075
Why the fuck did you get a job that requires long periods of standing then? There are endless jobs that require you to sit on your ass all day.
It's hard not to judge someone whose main priority is to absolve themselves of all responsibility for every single little issue.
>>16506085
Because I was desperate to get out of retail and didn't know what the new job entailed. Retail is its own little circle of hell.
Go on, talk about the endless jobs that require me to sit all day. Because I want one.
>>16506090
>Go on, talk about the endless jobs that require me to sit all day. Because I want one.
Now I KNOWS you trollan.
>>16506099
No it was a legitimate request
>>16506099
Not OP, but that's not a thing where I live unless you're white collar and sit in an office.
>>16506103
I'm not even that disabled. I just need to rest frequently for very short amounts of time, or just give me a damn chair and it'll make us both happier. I'm a very good, hard worker, loves to please, loves to work. I just want a job where I'm actually appreciated, my needs accounted for, and my potential put to good use.
>>16506103
Which is at least 50% of all jobs in a city. On top of that theres any kind of driving jobs, most factories now give workers the option to sit, call centres, and god knows how many more.
What qualifications do you have OP. What are you good at?
>>16506109
>What are you good at?
I'm fucking good at coming in on time (usually early) and getting shit done efficiently and to the best of my ability.
>>16506112
You want to work for a small company then. Even a startup. Somewhere that you will need to think on your feet once in a while, like if someone is off sick, you can help do their role. Not a huge mega corp that you have a procedure and script for every process.
You wouldn't believe how helpful it is to have just a general admin person in a small company. Someone to answer the phone, and let the genuine customers speak to the boss, but filter out the telesales junk that wastes his time. Someone to run out and buy pens and paper when the printer runs out. Someone to make coffee for clients or visitors.
That's how you get appreciated, by helping out unexpectedly. You won't be appreciated or thanked for just doing your job. You need to do that bit more.
Hope this helps, if you have any other questions ill be around for a while longer.
>>16506134
>general admin
This sounds like me. I love helping. How can I be this person? Where do I even start?
>small company
>>16506072
I was moreso implying you get a plane ticket just to visit. If you really wanna drive though, you can... that's just a long drive. Obviously you'd wanna take the car for an actual move.
Have you all met irl before?
>>16506140
No, sadly. We both agreed that if I ever come over there, it should be permanently due to reasons. If I come over, just stay.
Right now you guys got me actively looking on job websites though. I saw an offer for an "Oil Route Sales and Service Tanker Driver" but it said I needed to do everything BUT sit and drive
>>16506147
Go for an admin job. There will be the most opportunities.
Write a good CV and go and give it to any and all small companies around you (DONT EMAIL IT, GO AND SPEAK TO SOMEONE). Say you would even do part time, a few days a week. If the person who takes your cv seems flustered or overworked, you have a good target.
>>16506147
Having your first meeting be a permanent move is probably a bad idea. Not gonna tell you how to live your life, but I'd get AT LEAST a visit in before moving for good. It sucks to think about the possibility of it not working out, but in every relationship that is a very real possibility. Best to test the waters before you're stuck drowning out at sea, y'know?
Find out when his winter break starts and visit him. A bit short notice, but since you're NEET at the moment, and he'll be out of school, what's the harm?
>>16506158
Anon you are entirely right on all aspects. So totally and truthfully right. But fuck it, you know? Fuck it. We're not perfect. We have our ups and downs. Just fuck it. Just fuck my shit up. I just want to go there. I don't care about being overly cautious anymore.
>>16506154
Admin job in small company, correct?
>>16506160
>Admin job in small company, correct?
Yes. But it may be called something else on job boards.
>>16506163
Administrative assistant I see a lot of.
But fuck, that means I have to update my resume. First job didn't need it. Second job didn't need it. As a result my resume is a conglomerate of bullshit I put together to make myself sound good.
fug I need to get around to making a proper resume/CV
>>16506147
Most local driving jobs are actually delivery jobs that are more like warehousing a few miles from the warehouse. They wreck the bodies of able young men. If you can stand for an hour and lift 100lbs you might be able to swing something like fuel delivery. If you just want to sit then your options are pretty much only long haul no touch freight. Even then, you'll probably have to drop and hook trailers, which either takes a lot of strength or a lot of time.
>>16506080
Without gaming you're going to have to get involved in the real world. Go outside for a while and look around at things. Dress appropriately, look, sit, and observe as you see fit.
>>16506169
post it if you want /adv/ice
I really hate the part about the references. It's slacking. At that time I had no references to list on a resume but now I do.
Also I've always wondered about how I can observe people without freaking them out. Some people are genuinely fun to watch, especially kids. Kids don't give a fuck and it's awesome.
