This is probably one of those threads where I already know the answer, but I'm gonna ask anyway
>get fuckbuddy
>fucking for about a month
>notice we're starting to act a bit closer than is normal for fuckbuddies
>cuddling and staying over long after sex
>drinking together, getting food
>holding hands while we cuddle (and in public if drunk)
>don't want to date her at this point but also like her as more than a vagina
>i bring this up, about how we're doing all this stuff and how I feel
>she agrees that she's getting attached but also doesn't want to date, just keep things how they are
>fast forward another month, we're basically dating without the stuff that takes effort
>we're exclusive (but still just fwb)
bad stuff begins here
>she switches birth control
>next time I come over she's not in the mood which is a first
>happens the next time as well
>talk to her about it, she says her new birth control has killed her sex drive and she doesn't know what to do about it
>ask to hang out a couple times after that and get excuses
>confront her if she is trying to end things or what and to be straightforward
>quote:
>"I don't know what I want with you now since I seem to have lost my interest in sex, which hopefully doesn't last but idk. And I don't want you to wait on me. So at least for te time being maybe we shouldn't plan on seeing each other and obviously you can do whatever you want with other people"
So that was a week ago. I guess what I'm wondering is, is it really over? I can't help but feel used; we seemed pretty close but as soon as my cock is of no use to her she doesn't want to see me anymore.
Is it possible she just doesn't want to be selfish and ask me to keep seeing her because she thinks all I want is sex? Or some other weird shit like that? Or am I just fucked and I should delete her number?
Any insights, advice, or comments welcome. And yeah I know I'm a dumbfuck for getting attached to a fwb.
Next time you're at her house, throw her coffee pot against the wall and watch it shatter into pieces
>>16495453
I don't understand this kind of shitposting, what do you get out of this?
Sounds like it's really between you and her. What do YOU want from her?
You're fucked. You were just fuckbuddies, you were growing attached, you liked it, she didn't, she ended it to browse for someone better suited to her taste
>>16495471
Yeah see that was my first reaction. But the thing is, she initiated most of the romantic stuff.
If we were watching a movie and I was just lying there, she'd look up and say "you're so far away" so I would hold her. And when she knew she wasn't in the mood, she still came over to my place, watched a movie, and asked to sleep over.
I dunno man, I definitely think there was something there from her, whether or not it still is.
>>16495465
Ideally I want her in my life the same way until we graduate in May and she goes off to law school or whatever. I know I'm not going to marry her but she was really brightening up my senior year.
I've been considering just texting/calling her later this week and discussing this. Worst case scenario she tells me to fuck off, but that's the scenario I'm already in right?
>>16495449
be honest here, you knew that you would get attached at some point, right? well... now you have to deal with it, she is starting to want to move on, you should do the same. This "I don't know what I want with you" is bullshit and you know that, do yourself a favor and cut contact with her.
>>16495504
but what if it's not man. What if...
How do you feel used?
You had an arrangement, you both became attached, and confusion, relationship issues, etc... came into the picture. It was mutually beneficial, until the emotional complications, and lowered libido.
You already know you fucked up, so I won't verbally lash you, but you better learn from this. You have to completely sever a FWB from your life, if you are becoming emotionally involved, as sex will just amplify said emotions.
Now... You need to think on what you want from her. Going back to a FWB situation is a poor choice, even if her libido returns, and you know that, right? You both became involved, exclusive, and a couple in all but name; this would most definitely happen again.
Either you leave this be, continue No Contact, and it is what it is, or you want to make the transition into an actual relationship. The latter is an entirely different problem I won't bother advising on, unless you want to make that transition.
So, Anon, what do you want from this? For what it is worth, it is possible she wants more, but gave you an out, or she could be distancing herself for any number of reasons.
Just give her some space man. I'd wait a week or a month and then contact her casually.
Don't try to ignite the lost flame, she'd be annoyed.
Whatever she's dealing with, I'd say both of you are being really mature about it. Keep it that way.
>>16495521
Don't live for the "what if" man, seriously.
>>16495541
I guess because I thought it was more than the arrangement at that point. Like in my mind, we had the sex and the other, and even without the sex I would have preferred or expected to continue the other. So if the loss of sex means the loss of everything, it means that all the other stuff was far less important than the sex, and thus I feel used because I don't share that opinion.
But yeah I know, before even making this thread I had decided that if she contacted me again, I'd have to have a relationship or nothing. Honestly I think I do want that right now. But I don't think she does, and if she did I wouldn't know how to broach it.
>>16495542
It's been a week already
>>16495574
I'm not living for a what if, the what if is pretty tangible and able to be confirmed or not I just don't know how. It's not like I lose an opportunity by pursuing this one
>>16495449
Just walk away it's not worth it.
