>>17302868
You say what you're cool with, and let them choose if they're okay to be with you or not.
You don't impose anything, but you definitely talk about it.

If you're strictly monogamous, you shouldn't date someone polyamorous, tho.

jealouse yes, possessive maybe not.
>One of the things we've talked about is how she is "polyamorous" and might someday want to date another guy/girl while still having me as her boyfriend.
Just make it clear right now for you and her, if you would ever be okay with sharing her. If you cannot, then tell her now so you can break up or she can "Try to change" to probably end up just cheating behind your back and then blame you for it because "You wouldn't let her be herself"

If you are cool with sharing, then give her the green light and share yourself a little bit too since you have a free pass. Honestly, being in an open relationship is no different than being "single and hooking up" because at the end of the day you are still fucking around with people who themselves are fucking around with others. The difference is you get to call one of them your "gf" and she can be your main source of physical and emotional comfort.

If you want a monogamous relationship, be clear on that, and end it. Move on, find someone more old fashioned and settle with them.

>>17302879
So I could say something like "knowing you have physical relationships outside of ours makes me extremely uncomfortable". As long as I'm not saying "no, you can't do that"?

>>17302891
I'd say so, yes. In my opinion you don't have to restrain her freedom of doing whatever she wants, and starting a discussion with "YOU CAN'T DO THIS" is never good. On the other hand, it's important to be on the same page and you can surely tell her that you're uncomfortable with certain behaviours and if she acted on them it'd be a deal breaker because you seek a monogamous relationship. Establish boundaries before it's too late.

>>17302888
I see. So, basically, she said that she likes going on dates because she likes getting to know people. She likes it when people are trying to impress her. And also, sex is obviously a really easy way to get to know people really fast. She doesn't understand the necessity for labels behind "just hanging out" as friends and "dating".

> The difference is you get to call one of them your "gf" and she can be your main source of physical and emotional comfort.

That sounds great to me and perfectly fine. But what if I need her for whatever reason, and she's invested in someone else?

>>17302888
Oh also, because of the kind of person she is, I doubt that she'd actually cheat on me. She self labels as like, borderline asexual? So sex really isn't that big of a deal for her.

>>17302868
Run mate lol. These chicks are usually headcases. It really fucking sucks this is your first girlfriend and shes pulling this shit, really damages any possible relationship future.

>>17302925
holy fuck run run run run run run

>>17302953
I mean, at least she's being very honest with me. She's been hurt badly in the past so I can understand her need to reach out to as many people as possible, perhaps? She has said that she cannot place her full trust in anyone, even myself, even though she has my full trust. It's not crazy, just very free spirited.

>>17302925
>>17302942
So she's asexual, but she likes to fuck people at random just to get to know them better?

Open relationships don't last for shit and for many, even the fact that she just suggested the idea would be a huge red flag. I don't mean to be an alarmist, you can feel free to take your chances by telling her you'd rather not have her fuck others, but realistically you shouldn't be expecting great things from this relationship.
It is entirely normal to expect dedication from someone you're dating, but it is important to actually tell them that, especially if they're as... free-spirited as your girl.

>>17302868
If she wants an open relationship, you should consider it, but that means you should consider open relationships as well and it will probably ruin any chances for you to have a serious relationship in the future with her. Mistakes will be made on both your parts if you accept so brace yourself.

>>17302973
Not asexual, just on the asexual spectrum or whatever. Like there are periods where she doesn't want or need sex at all. And there are periods where she want it a lot! But whatever.

Point is, she says something like "as long as I come back and sleep next to you at night, what does it matter". Or "as long as I end up with you at the end of the day, that's what is important".

Open relationships that are unsuccessful, why? If both parties are okay with it, why is it bad?

>>17302942
>borderline asexual
That's not how it works

reeeeeeee

>>17302972
i'm not sure if this is bait or not. People who have been hurt badly usually don't try to reach out to as many people as possible its usually the complete opposite they shut people out.

>>17302983
mate honestly it sounds like shes already slept with other people while being with you. She is not asexual, shes not on the spectrum, sorry mate.

>>17302983
What you can expect is the following:
>girl can get laid whenever she wants to, and she does, lots
>obviously this carries an increased risk of STD but let's ignore that
>you, as a loser who only barely got a 26-year-old slut for a girlfriend, will not get laid with anyone
>girl eventually finds someone who both can and will provide for her and is more attractive than you are
>she leaves you for the new guy

Also, girls fundamentally like possessive male behavior. Not necessarily every last one of them, but most do, you should be able to observe this much from female-targeted romance novels and movies. If you're just fine with others getting intimate with her (even if she asked you to let her), it gives off a message that you don't actually care that much about being together.

>Like there are periods where she doesn't want or need sex at all. And there are periods where she want it a lot!
If I wanted to be cynical, I'd say that's a cycle of when she has someone else to fuck and when the other person dumps her

>>17302983

Listen, do you. If you're okay with this, fine. But this is a pretty big deal. By sleeping with strangers and other people, she exposes you to STDs, regardless of the precautions she takes. She's pretending to value your time and perspective, but really, she's just being selfish, even if she doesn't realize it. The potential for emotional investment is high too, likely when she grows out of this behavior. (She might not, but I don't know many who haven't.)

It matters because someone is sharing special, intimate moments with her that you should be sharing together. She wants to have her cake and eat it too, and that's the problem.

At least it would be for me, and I'm not even that jealous of a guy.

>>17302868
>>17302942
>polyamorous asexual
I can't tell if we're being serious anymore or just making up the most ridiculous labels we can conceive of.