May sound like rambling but please bear with me. Just need someone to talk to.
>have anxiety, getting over depression
>addictive personality
>use marijuana for a year, recreational, before then I was never like this
>be oblivious to the fact it prevents me from being ambitious (lack of dopamine)
>been fumbling about trying to get a proper full time job, dependent on my parents out of college until I got one
>in denial about the lack of ambition, which interfered with my life
>20 lbs overweight
>parents got me on a weight loss plan
>still 20 lbs overweight, cheated on the weight loss plan while trying to get the job together and other things
>nothing's changed in 3 months for me
>parents got wise and called me out on it
>said I fucked them out of money and that they were really disappointed with me
1/2
So, I did fuck them out of money and I'm ruining myself and now I feel like it's too late to change anything. I feel ungrateful. I haven't smoked anything in 3 days and besides the guilt and shame, I have no desire to smoke. I really don't. I did not eat over the past 2 days (I did today)
Now, I've fallen out of religion but felt I was at the end of my spiritual rope. I even went to confession at my church yesterday because I felt so bad. One thing the priest told me was that I stop the "nonsense" (weed) and get back on the weight loss plan and to take things one day at a time.
THAT is one of my problems. I look so far ahead and worry about the future or things that have not even happened yet and I don't worry about the present.
So, yeah. I'm not sure if anyone else can relate to this stuff but at my age out of college and the opportunities I've had, I can't blame anyone but myself. I was selfish and privileged and narcissistic about what felt good FOR ME.
2/2
Do something about it nigger
>>17248786
In my mind it's too late.
>>17248807
Not in real life you little bitch.
>>17248776
>and now I feel like it's too late to change anything
It's too late to change what happened, never too late to learn from it and make sure it doesn't happen again.
Long-time pot head here, OP. 6 years and still going on. It just fucks up your life unless you've been dealt good cards. Just quit.
>>17248807
It's never too late, nigzilla, you can do it and wrap everything around.