What for?

>>27555
Transcript:

...transition to African academic life. I expect by the time I get there to find you both settled, fluent in whatever it is Ghanians speak, and of course happy with the job, the country, and each other. The opportunity, the adventure, and the good you'll be doing are all things I envy you; may it all happen the way you want it to.

Having made a small transpositional error in setting up the Wronskian coordinates on the control board of his time machine, Ferdinand Feghoot entered a temporal warp which landed him unexpectedly in the middle of an African jungle, late 19th century. To his surprise the first person he saw was a European, attired in pith helmet and tropical whites. "Howdy," said the white man, staggering up to ff;"

>>28397
(cont)

"Dr Livingston, I presume." "No, no," replied ff, identifying himself. "Oh," said the other, disappointed. "Well, my name's Stanley, I'm a newspaperman. Why don't I buy you a beer." Being in the journalistic profession, Stanley was able to find a bar close by, even in the middle of an unexplored jungle. Till midnight, they sat juicing and petting the pub owner's tame lion, and swapping tall stories which Stanley always managed to top, despite ff's extensive travels through time and space; though Stanley told him, condescending, that if he ever wanted a job on a paper, he was sure Mr Bennett would hire him in a flash. At midnight, the publican came through hollering "Time, gentlemen, please." "Wha," said Stanley, "you have blue laws in this part of the country?" "Sorry," said the owner; "though maybe you can find one open on the other side of the river," waving a vague arm out at the darkness. "How the hell," inquired Stanley, "do you expect us to find anything in this confounded pitch blackness?" At which point the resourceful ff came up with a suggestion. "Why not borrow the owner's pet lion," he said, "set him loose and follow him? He's sure to lead us to another pub." "Why is that?" said Stanley. "Didn't anybody ever tell you," said Ferdinand Feghoot, "that a strayed lion is the shortest distance between two pints?"

Bon voyage, and send postcards.

>>28145
(not OP) After doing some googling, apparently this is a "feghoot", which is a type of short science fiction story popular in the 70s which ends in a terrible pun. No idea what the original request was.