A few hours ago there was a thread about RimWorld where everyone yelled about Dwarf Fortress. To get the thread back on topic I started a new colony and storytimed it as I played. It was generally well-received, but I had to leave to go to the gym and now that thread is dead. So let's have a RimWorld thread, and to keep it alive, I will continue to storytime.
So, here are the continuing adventures of the SS Shitfit and her faithful crew:
Original three:
>Trigger
Trigger grew up on an urbworld and had a violent youth. Consequently he never learned the fundamentals, like reading and writing, or how to aim. Despite this, he is the heavy weapons guy, wielding the heaviest weapon aboard, an AK47. All his time in and around gangs and lowlifes has left him with a finer appreciation of pain - he's a masochist. He's also just 22 years old, and in fine health.
>Beryl
The ying to Trigger's yang, Beryl is a mad scientist. Mad is a little strong. She's eccentric, abrasive, but very smart. She and Trigger do not get along - this mostly has to do with Triggers continued sexual (not romantic) advances.
>Kurt
REEEEE GET OUT OF MY GARDEN
Has tried to romance Beryl as well, and got beaten up by her for his troubles. Now they hate each other too.
Newcomers:
>Robles
A fat slav who begged for help after being kidnapped by pirates. He's petty and jealous, but hasn't been around for long. He's just a fat dumb oaf.
>Caskey
The other female, who has also rebuffed Trigger. She's dumb as a rock but a deft hand at plants, so she and Kurt get along quite well. Stumbled out of the jungle one day with nothing but her clothes and a fucking rocket launcher. Sadly, the rocket launcher only had one shot left.
>Fudd
A blind warg with no teeth. Kurt's pet.
These five intrepid, dysfunctional human beings (and warg) are the crew of the SS Shitfit. Welcome aboard.
Happening now: nothing. The colony awaits its next disaster.
And, of course, it never takes long for disaster to strike.
It's not much of a disaster though, just a bunch of savages looking for easy pickings. The SS Shitfit has fought off worse before. With any luck we might get a few prisoners for conversion to our glorious cause/sale into slavery/emergency limb transplants. Let's see what happens.
>>337811960
>everyone yelled about Dwarf Fortress.
Why
I don't think RW plays anywhere near as similar as DF
>>337812892
The aftermath: 2 savages killed, and Fudd. RIP in peace, pupper. The dog first had his rear right paw cut off, and then had his heart destroyed by a great bow. Kurt will be sad, but he can take solace knowing that the warg wasn't doomed to a slow and protracted death on this mudball planet without medicine or vets. A clear shot to the hear and it's over.
Meanwhile, Trigger continued to be useless with his AK outside melee range. He cannot aim for shit. No prisoners, sadly.
Just another day for the colony.
Never again will Kurt be nuzzled by a cute animal.
;_;
I tried playing this game way back when it was first given a public release. I couldn't figure out how the fuck to play for the life of me. The game does look fun though, has it become slightly easier to use/is there a decent tutorial or explanatory menu thing now?
Probably doesn't help that I've never really played any game like this before.
Hot off the back of the savages raiding us, Beryl and Robles contract malaria. The enforced bedrest does nothing for Beryl's acerbic tongue and shitty mood. Hopefully they pull through, but only because we need the extra hands.
>>337813274
;__;7 Feels batman
>>337813168
This. Although they have some similarties, comparing RW to DF is like comparing Minecraft to Terraria. Or to Factorio. Similar, but different.
>>337813343
It's certainly a lot more complete than then. It's not finished - don't pay for it - but the latest Alpha is up on KAT. Worth another shot.
How 2 play:
1. food via farms
2. shelter
3. turrets
4. research
>>337811960
>SS Shitfit
>>337813635
Kurt buries his warg in quiet spot near Kurt's beloved garden.
This is a place far removed from the mass grave for dead pirates and raiders.
rimworld is the tits. it's the best dorflike out there, and it's still in development
cant wait for it to go popular
MORE pirates.
The game just does not like me today.
Trigger, Kurt, and Caskey wearily man the ramparts. Beryl and Robles are still bedridden from Malaria, so it's down to three. The pirates are but two, and have only melee weapons, but with those personal forcefields they'll be a menace.
Time to fight.
>>337813942
>it's the best dorflike out there
Yeah, a really hotly contested title that one, with gems like Dwarfs, Goblin Camp and Spacebase DF-9 out there...
>>337814086
Backup has arrived! They're only savages, but all they need to do is be meatshields anyway. The tribespeople from Toxos Barra have always been friends of the SS Shitfit, but I think this solidifies their status as preferred trading partners. Trigger, Kurt, and Caskey breathe sighs of relief. Though normally dismissive of the savages, thanks to his urbworld upbringing, Trigger keeps quiet and keeps his insults to himself.
This is new to the game in this update I think. I've never had friendlies assist me during a raid before.
>>337814383
An easy victory, though the Toxos Barra tribespeople did suffer a casualty. The loot is good - personal shield generators and a plasteel longsword.
Things Beryl won't do: survive.
Illness works as a race: disease progress versus immunity. The disease is progressing much faster than the immunity. Although no one really likes Beryl we need her brain. She's our researcher, and without her it's going to be a slow road back to industry.
Get well soon, Beryl.
>>337814764
Meanwhile, Slavshit the Fatfuck pulls through with flying colours.
>>337814956
Thank you merciful God.
I think I might cut Beryl some slack after this. She's a tough old bitch. She beat the fuck out of Kurt, and now she's survived a brush with death. Know why her illness got so bad? Trigger neglected her treatment. No joke. They hate each other, and he treated Slav just fine and promptly on time.
Beryl could still die, by the way. She's not out of the woods yet.
I fucking love this anon, keep going.
You may have noticed that I build in wood a lot. An invasion of Beavers is a serious threat to my colony, so they have to go. Trigger embarks on a multi-day hunting trip, scourging Beavers from the face of the planet.
It's a shame Fudd isn't here to help. He'd feast on beaver flesh.
Meanwhile, the business of the colony continues with the construction of an infirmary, because it seems to be needed...
>>337815547
Can you tame? Perhaps you could get a fudd 2.0
>>337816005
this
>>337816005
>>337816131
You can tame and you can also purchase new animals from traders.
How about a cat instead of a dog? This Cougar ought to do...
>>337816274
>Taming a fucking cougar
Godspeed you fucking madman, tame the shit out of that Cougar
>>337816274
Kurt has a 7% chance of taming her per attempt, so it might take a while.
In the meantime, marvel at the modern miracle of refrigeration! At long last, food security is assured. It's only upward from here. With food stockpiled for months, and all colonists fed and happy, and no casualties so far, things are looking pretty good.
So of course shit's about to go wrong.
So im using these mods and in the middle of my game I suddenly stopped being able to repair structures, turretts, walls. what do?
>>337816702
Of course. The second I hit submit.
Well, shit. Kurt's long-lost lover has been discovered, and she's on her way here. The problem is pirates.
Kurt's begging and screaming that we rescue her, and more hands are always good. The only problem is that I don't think these pirates will be a pushover. Trigger and Beryl don't give a shit - cut her loose, they say - and Kurt obviously loves her. Slav is neutral, and Casker sides with Kurt. They can't just leave her to die.
What say you, 4chan?
>>337816740
Say, I got no idea fampai, only played vanilla since I pirated it, deconstruct and build again, no?
>>337811960
What's the latest version of Rimworld?
>>337817092
Alpha 13. It's on KAT.
>>337816927
Go for it, you have plenty of food for a good while and it ain't hard to make and get, and the more people ya have the faster you grow and the bigger the potential. Plus, another idiot to carry shit is good, plus, could use her as melee fodder with the plasteel sword ya have, yknow.
>>337816942
that's what I've been doing, but it costs valuable components, and damaged structures are just doomed get destroyed in a raid eventually.
anyway this is my colony, sorry for interrupting your story time.
>>337817207
As you say.
Say hello to Poppy Quinn. She's a green thumb, just like Kurt (hardly surprising) and very capable (very surprising).
Seems like she'll make a fine addition despite her advanced age.
>>337816927
Do it
>>337817146
Thanks. Will give it a try.
>>337817229
This is a RimWorld thread, not a storytime thread.
Storytime is just to keep it sliding off the board. Post whatever you like, we don't bite.
>>337817351
Now say hello to Poppy's friends.
I think we're fucked, lads.
That's 2 shielded plasteel swordsmen, a shotgunner, a pistolero, a Deagle-brand Deagle pistolero, and a guy named Von Doom with a fucking M72 LAW.
God save us.
>>337817561
You got this anon
SITUATION NOT GOOD
>>337817763
THE SS SHITFIT SHALT NOT FALL, STAND YOUR GROUND SOLDIER
Welp, they're taking all my colonists.
I hope Kurt gets raped to death.
Oh sweet fucking irony.
They decided to kidnap who they could and leave, but I managed to prevent them from taking all but one colonist.
The one who got kidnapped?
Kurt.
Poppy and Kurt were just never meant to be.
>>337818000
Poetic.
>>337818103
These two prisoners are going to fucking suffer.
I am going to amputate all of their limbs and leave them torsos that can do nothing but experience pain.
They'll pay for this.
I don't think I have enough medicine for this....
Casualties:
Kurt kidnapped.
Trigger had a foot cut off.
Caskey had a finger bitten off.
Infections everywhere.
Let's see how we go.
>>337818000
Well anon, you still got food in the fridge and a good plantation, start walling off areas you can't defend and its salvageable.
Meanwhile, a psychic ship has crashed.
This shit is going to assfuck my colonists in the brain until I kill it, and I can't kill it while half my army is laid up in the med centre.
This will be fun.
>>337818382
FUG
And now Poppy just got mauled by a cougar driven mad by the psychic ship.
All colonists are confined to the ranch until further notice.
The first casualty, but there's no time to mourn.
A good thing I had all those graves pre-dug, but we can't bury her with all the mad animals outside. She will have to lay in state for now.
Meanwhile the prisoners aren't faring any better. Erisen's gone berserk, and none of my colonists are in any condition to stop him.
Fuck 'em. They can live or die for all I care.
>Start playing rimworld
>Everything is going just fine, been able to hold off every raid so far despite it being challenging, get up to 12 colonists or so and several turrets for defense
>Manage to hold my own against a raid of the robots, killed 2 of the big slug dudes and 6 scythe guys
>Start building my ship because it's endgame
>Pirate raid with THIRTY ONE [31] PEOPLE start attacking
>Literally no chance to win
>Try again
>Doing a little worse but still holding my own
>Get to ship construction
>Tribe attacks with ~40 people, literally unstoppable zerg force
How do I survive a raid once I start building my ship?
Poppy's gone mad with rage at the loss of her lover, and the destruction of hope. Just as we were suiting up to go deal with the psychic ship too, so she's fully equipped.
>>337819090
assault rifles for everyone, more turrets, build a wall with choke point entrances
Ha ha! Time for ayyliens.
I think she's fucked, senpai. This may be game over.
It might have seemed foolhardy to attack the ayys right now, but the drone was driving everyone berserk. It was now or never.
In what could possibly be his final action, Trigger managed to miss the ayylien and shoot Poppy in the head, killing her instantly.
Trigger came onto this planet being unable to hit a fucking thing, and that's how he plans to leave it.
Well.
I guess that's that, then.
;_;7
I wish rimworld had more stuff to do. More choices.
I didn't even finish my first game, because I built one of everything, researched most of those 10 or so technologies, and the only thing left was to grind for the spaceship.
Defense was mostly just "build more of that single type of sentry gun".
There really wasn't anything that I wanted to produce either. I had all the crafting stations, but the only worthwhile product was mortar shells, which are questionably useful too. You can't make any of the good weapons, implants, or even medkits. My crafting stations were usually idling, or making rock statues to sell.
>>337819659
All that's left is for Beryl to bleed out.
She was a tough old girl and she's leaving last. Turn the lights out when you go.
>>337819670
Mods will fix it.
The end for real this time.
So we're faced with a choice. Does anyone want me to start again with a new colony? Or is that enough storytime for today?
>>337819965
Start again. MAKE SS Shitfit GREAT AGAIN
