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You are currently reading a thread in /v/ - Video Games
You are currently reading a thread in /v/ - Video Games
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>>322023845
I can't make RCT2 sound shitty.
It's shit.
A bunch of autists pretend they understand the legal system of a fictional universe
>>322023845
bespectacled woman beats everyone up with her armpit hair
>>322023845
It's Dota 2.
The graphics are shit, the combat is fucking atrocious, and the game is full of assholes.
>>322023845
>good level design
>deep lore
>the great music
>everything can and will one hit kill you
A western RPG where they barely even pretend that your choices matter.
You work your ass off to get a bunch of neon spandex-clad assholes really powerful, only to get surpassed by some dude who never left the starting area and paid people to abuse a custom mission system, and then it turns out you're both retarded because the plug gets pulled on the damn game and now all of your time and effort means nothing.Every day without it is more suffering, why did it have to die ;_;
>>322025986
You described every RPG
>>322025512
Okay now I'm curious.
>>322023845
bunch of high-schoolers run around and try to save the world.
pretty edgy
waifus and japanglish soundtrack abound
A dumbass game where you invade a sovereign nation for money and somehow all of the worlds powers with their infinite weapons have to rely on fucking you
>story about two boys with daddy issues
>combat rewards you for wasting your time
>puzzles that fuck up the pace
>shit camera
>terrible platforming
>chess pieces
>>322026497
Isn't that just every JRPG?
>>322023845
All you do is fucking jump.
Jump over there
Jump on this asshole
Every once in a while you swim and climb but fuck that shit, so fucking tedious
Also the fuck is up with that stupid fucking pixel art style? I mean fuck.
>>322026648
Chess pieces gave it away.
>>322023845
Looks like shit, even though it's quite old it didn't look good back then I guess. That's what you get when 15 germans are making it for scraps.
The game is buggy and clunky as fuck, most people give up due to terrible controls. Combat is pretty shitty too. Not the best story or voice acting. Difficulty spikes can ruin experience for the unprepared.
My top 3
>RPG with platformer elements until it became a platformer with RPG elements
>Pre Waifu Simulator it was just weeaboo chess
>Saturday morning cartoon as a Turn based strategy
>>322026759
some are notably less edgy than others
>>322026850
They're too bad not to mention.
You jump around with a meme character.
You're a mailman who delivers his package late.
You fight a bunch of grenade spamming pricks across half the continent only to be nearly killed by some ass with a handgun.
You wander around a bunch of damp caves.
>>322025512
Either KOTOR.
>>322025512
Space Station 13?
>terrible music
>terrible graphics
>terrible gameplay
>stupid story
You play as a mailman with missing brain matter
Some fat asshole with an eye disease steals food from some nigger and he and his nephew go get it back
>>322023845
You play as an idiot who participates in a gameshow and you constantly have to look after your daughter, like, every 5 minutes.
And then the most cliche thing happens and there's zombies. You pick random shit that's laying around and throw it.
Eventually you also get in stupid fights against a postman and two sluts among others.
Also the controls are really shitty and even moving is a pain in the ass.
>>322027048
New Vegas?
>>322025512
Morrowind
>>322023973
Manage employees and pay off your loans while making sure the grass gets cut, vomit gets swept, and the merry-go-round doesn't fall apart for the 18th time.
>You play as a low res nigger
You play as a dumb kid at summercamp who has to solve everybody's emotional problems because they're too fucking dumb to do it themselves
>>322027240
Yes
>>322025512
Risk of Rain?
>>322026759
Only modern ones. Some older JRPGs actually featured adults. It was crazy.
>>322027204
Really? I like the games but Dead Rising 2 is your favorite game?
Of all time? You've never played a better game than Dead Rising 2?
>>322027170
New vegas
So you're on this alien planet killing shit like dragons and monsters and a head in a jar and if you're good enough you find out you had a vagina the whole time
>bugs everywhere
>technically broken
>half the time you'll be reloading areas just so the game isn't ruined
>freezes every hour or so
>was only financially successful because of it's name banking off of the then-latest and greatest casual faggot FPS
>>322025079
Ace Attorney? VNs aren't games anon
>>322026648
>>322026850I don't get it.
Wind's howling
you repair a ship because you were in a long distance relationship for some time and want to get some pussy
you decide to go snooping around in a really isolated city and come across these little shit girls that you can kill if you want to, but you dont have to
youre tasking with helping a bunch of faggots who tell you to "go here" and "do this" while some madman always thwarts your plan and makes it a huge waste of time
oh yeah and its all underwater which youd think is cool but the novelty wears off in the first five minutes
>>322026885
I wanna say you're talking about E.Y.E. but that was made by French devs.
>>322027456
I have, but if it was for that I would just pick the objetively best game I owned.
DR2 is just a 6/10 for me but it's my favorite anyway.
Some niggers self insert into disney movies
So you play as this gay dinosaur and if you get hit this mother fucking kid doesn't shut the fuck up.
Should have just eaten the faggot when he landed on your back.
>>322025512
deus ex
>>322023845
Your only directive is to kill yourself.
You grind the same shit for 100 hours to make equips so that you can grind the next shit for 100000 hours to make better equips.
You're a furry in a plane and everyone spouts memes
>>322026009
pls leave
>>322027673
kangdom hearts mang
>>322027590DMC3 has chess piece enemies. They're not fun to fight.
You have amnesia and some coincidences imply you're the chosen one and you save the world.
An ancient evil died and another ancient evil hascome. You'll get shit on by smug NPCs and die a lot.
You spend more time trying to look cool than actually playing the game
>>322023845
your weapon is too big and you swing it like a fucking spastic
eventually you win but you have to do it again, sometimes with other people
you can make shit too but it takes forever
An RPG where everything is bad except for the gameplay and music.
>>322027821
OH, alright, thanks. Haven't played DMC in such a long time.
people manipulate you and you are sad
>>322027947
Most MMOs are nothing but thinly veiled dressup games
Some stupid rip-off of ghostbusters but with the king of second bananas
Not my favorite since I can't choose one, but it's the last one I am playing
RNG simulator with no real strategy other than hide like a bitch and wait for enemies to fuck up their position, you can immediately fail a mission if RNG decides to make everyone panic like a retard, especially in early game and deaths are permanent
>>322027541
Even worse,Ace Attorney Online
>>322027882
?
Game made by some tin-foil-hat-wearing autistis that looks and sounds like everyone involved was hungover.
>>322028036
Monster Hunter?
>>322028257
yes
>>322023845
a disney reject swordsman gets cucked, fails a bromance, and gets shot to shit trying to save his mentally handicapped closet lover.
>>322025304
bayoonetta? excuse me, gotta fap to some fanfic hentai
>>322028229
Deus Ex
You beat really hard enemies and never get any reward or satisfaction for it
>>322026885
>>322027620
Gothic 2
>>322025512
Gothic
A man comes to a new land by accident and enslaves the colourful natives to retrieve machine parts, treasures and fruit
>>322028354
Kingdom hearts?
>>322028036
Monster Hunter
>You have to pay to travel anywhere that isn't on foot
>Sometimes there's too much shit to explore
>The main quest starts out with you running errands for some drug addict that lives in a shack
>Just about every npc is an asshole to you
>Hardly any voiced dialogue
>Weapons break hilariously easy
>Quest givers give vague as fuck instructions like "You'll see a large rock after walking for a bit, go east and you'll find it, maybe"
>>322028594
No, but same company. Here's another hint:
>worlds shittiest levelling system. its literally RNG
Fuckawful camera and bland levels make fighting the same handful of enemy types over and over again even more boring. The game has cheesy minibosses that literally spawn midlevel based on RNG.
Generic stop the evil armies of orcs and dragons and various other satans with artificial difficulty that means you have to grind your ass off until things stop one-shotting you. The progressively more jewish point requirements for training skills make the latter even worse. The game gets worse as you get further in, and the final act is a linear dungeon crawl with copy-pasted trash mobs. Also, the voice acting fucking sucks.
>>322028204
Those AAO threads are attracting a lot of people, uh? Just finished spectating some memes in area 0
Short, dull, gimmicky game that relies on violence to appeal to "hardcore" fans.
TOO HARD
DEVELOPERS MAKING IT WORSE
OMG BROKEN RNG
Wait that's actually what /v/ posts about it are like
>>322028581
Aww yiss, Pikmin.
wiffwiffiwffiwffiwffiwffiwffiwffiwff
a fat fucking jew made this piece of shit game. retards, little kids, and letsplayers eat this shit up too. it attracts massive autism and modders made it even more autistic. how the fuck can anyone play this shit?REALLY LAZY FUCKING GRAPHICS.
>>322028354
The last story?
>>322028456
Demon's souls
>>322028581
Dark Cloud?
Another generic group of 4 kids saving the world bullshit. You have to go to lighthouses. Lots of backtracking and puzzles, on top of an annoying as fuck encounter rate. At least the music is good.
>>322028989
Meincraft.
All the combat is slow, the game is a grind, best gear is from the most bullshit bosses.
>>322028936
Dankest Dungeon. The only thing I don't like about the game is that for some reason your party members are retarded and forget they have healing spells until someone is trying to stab them in the face.
>>322029020
No >>322028948 He got it
>>322028936
Dankest Dungeonthey're right
>>322028410
Yup
It's a fucking meme game
>>322029020
Not the last story, no. I played TLR and liked it, is The Last Story on PC though?
>game hint #2:
how the fuck do they expect you to be able to watch the ending? people keep putting bowls of onions under my face when I try.
>>322029176
Underfags plz go
All you do is click circles
You fight a lot of stereotypes as some little 5'7" manlet from Brooklyn.
>>322029064
yes
>lots of grinding basically required
>repetitive gameplay
>random generation leads to possibly unfair levels
>"muh feelz" story, not sure if this is a con
The entire game takes place in the exact same area. Every single level besides the first and last few take place on a single zeppelin. Its a horror game with no scares. The combat is wonky and hitboxes are off. The majority of what comes out of the main characters mouth is UGUU SO KAWAII gasps.
>>322023845
It's an RNG shitfest. You might as well just flip coins instead of playing this game. Also the story is the same every time.
Buggy as fuck opren world FPS, the NPCs repeat their lines all the fucking time and it costs the world to repair anything.
>>322023845
space super trooper falls into good/evil dichotomy and fucks aliens and travels to barren rocks to pick up weapon mods that are only marginally better than the ones you had
albino stitch has to save a racist tree.
>>322029282
No the other one
walking simulator of greece
>>322029295
Freedom Fighters
>>322028768
God Hand?
>>322028932
Every clover/platinum game ever.
RIP clover.
>>322028936
Darkest dungeon
>>322028989
Minecraft.
What do you even see in that game?
>>322028986
Thief 2?
You have to go around saving some clueless fucks from monsters that just happen to show up for no reason. The game ranges from hilariously easy to fucking bullshit in terms of platforming. You have to pay for your abilities, which means if you didn't find enough money, you have to go back like a fucking retard. Also, your sidekicks are some kind of goat and a cheetah.
>>322029583
portal ripoff?
>>322029619
I play minecraft with friends on a personal server. it's alright to just fuck around with while we wait for everyone to get together for d&d night.
>tfw forever dm.
>>322028354
tfw noone will ever get this.
You play as some loser guy, and you have to go all around town to do his fucking chores. Plus everybody in the game is going to give you shit for no reason at some point
>>322029595
no, think older
>>322029997
Freedom Veterans
>>322023845
QTEs
Specifically you have to wiggle the left stick
>>322029583
Talos principal.
>>322029506
Ori and the blind forest.
Good one.
>>322029454Dragon's Dogma
Can't wait for the PC release.
>>322030043
>>322030091
Oops ignore my i
>>322026969
third is obviously pokket monsteru
>>322030043
>>322029894
Is it Nier?
>>322029997
Punch Out
>>322030091
Wonderful 101?
It's a Star Wars game from the prequels era
>>322029894
ff7cc?
>>322030297
Episode 1 racer?
>>322030301
Yes.
>>322030280
Last guy
Same dev, didn't know they put it in their other games
It crashed before being able to finish character creation
>>322027947
runescape
Go around throwing little fucks and picking random shit 201 times.
>>322030280
Yes, Punch-Out
>>322027771
space fox
>>322029730
>>322030094
nay on the walking simulator
>>322030594
Close enough
>>322023845
A group of Japanese teenagers and some Brazillian dude argue about the merits of communism and capitalism.
>>322030814
Devil Survivor 2
GIRLS JUST WAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNT
TO BEAT
THE
BOOOO-OOOOOOYS
>>322028653
morrowind
>>322030363
Bullseye
>>322030410
shit, now I have no idea.
>>322029961
Animal crossing?
>>322026969
Second is Fire Emblem
Is the firstPaper Mario?If not I'm totally clueless
>>322031439
>Animal crossing?
Nope
In fact I'd say that's like the total opposite of the kind of game I'm thinking of
>>322025304
Bayo.
>>322025512
I wouldn't agree but it's probably Undertale.
>>322025986
Current trigger flavor of the month: Fallout 4.
>>322026969
I'm guessing...
>Indivisible, probably not
>Fire Emblem
>Pokémon
>>322027016
Shantae or Shovel Knight.
>>322027132
Your favorite game.
>>322030485
lol, Fallout 4.
>>322029961
Layton?
>>322030969
Yup.
Your parents take you to some art museum and they end up leaving you, taking some other kid instead, or you tell your friends to fuck off and you survive.
>>322031558
Postal 2?
>>322027479
Super Metroid
Ez
You spend literally half the game in menus modifying stats that don't have benefit during gameplay. The rest of the game is spent doing quests to unlock better versions of those useless stats.
>>322031558
Megaman battle network?
That's my last guess.
>>322031974
Is there a save with all outfits unlocked somewhere?
I really want to dress up Lightning but I don't want to play the game.
Some angry guy possesses a girls body and kills dozens upon dozens of people to find some sword. The final boss is the angry deciding to desecrate a statue
>>322025684
Some shmup game
>>322031801
Actually I was just writing Metroid not Super Metroid.
Half point
>>322029176
STANDING HERE
![postal_dude_by_kouno_b-d3hgatg[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/WGtYU2p.png "postal_dude_by_kouno_b-d3hgatg[1].png")
>>322031716
>>322032056
Sorry, you lose
>>322031762
Bingo
>>322032245
No, fuck off.The game starts you with the best outfit in the game, Equilibrium. The first couple quests get you the best accessories in the game: the black frenchie hat in that webm, and the scholar's glasses.
>>322023845
Shitty 2.5D "MM"ORPG with tiresome combat and non-existant leveling system
I have two, and they're not really my ABSOLUTE favorites.
A gaggle of illiterate mental defects wielding junk made to look like weapons dance with each other in the gravel-sufficient southwest for 16 straight hours.
A nasal-sounding boy/girl with a dildo for a hairstyle befriends a blue toilet sponge with teeth in a PCP-induced trek through a post-apocalyptic castle designed by children; here, he learns how to assume the forms of his slaughtered enemies by retrieving their souls through his paint brush of unending power.
>>322032713
tf2?
>>322032840I bet you a thousand dollars you'll never get the second one.
You play some fat fuck who needs to save the world from some faggots who came from a anime sword from the sky. Every time you level up you can only pick 1 of 3 options and have to kill the same shit over and over.
>>322029438
rule of rosemfw i found every fucking collectible with that retarded dog[/spoileer]
>>322032713
That second one sounds interesting.
>>322023845
Tumblr : the game, but with 4chan memes
>>322023845
You walk down hallways until you get game over
>>322023845
You and an old pedophile constantly blow up the world for all eternity
3 games but fuck you
Your main weapon is a farm tool
>>322033159
shovel knight
It's incredibly hard to marry any waifu in this game because the RNG fucks you over.
>>322023845
It's like a class based shooter, except the shooting mechanics are shit and no one like them.
>>322033605
Also, as a result, no one actually shoots often in the game
Your a loser who ran away from his parents to be with even bigger losers and weirdos at a summer camp.
>>322034058
Psychonauts
>>322034159
yep
>>322032508
That was good.
I gotta replay Postal 2 sometime soon.
>>322032713
This sounds like kirby canvas curse
>>322033152
>You walk down hallways until you get game over
Stanley Parable
>Tumblr: the game but with 4chan memes
YO YO SMOOTHIE TIME
You kill your best friends and you punch God, but you actually just punch God's face so not really. Also you ingest bugs to make yourself strong.
>>322033478
Rune factory IV
>>322033605
>>322033776
CS:GO?
>>322034298
Nocturne
>>322034298
NocturneI'm still assravaged about SMT x FE being total weeaboo shit
>>322034442
>bingo
>>322034297
>kirby canvas curse
Nope, try again.
You're given your first pet and then go out into the world and kill animals with said pet and kill other peoples pets. The owners are super ok with it and give you money if you do it.
>>322034550
I am too, Anon. Like three years without a whimper aside from "If I talk more about it, I will lose my job." Fuck whoever made #FE.
>>322023845
Imagine the tedium of court semantics and law with "completely original" 8 bit music. That's Phoenix Wright.
>>322034656
pokeman
two monkeys try to save another monkey
>>322026776
Mario
>>322034965
DKC2
You play as an overpowered newfag who ultimately shits on all the oldfags. The only man you can trust is a furry.
The game is also bugged theme park shitfest.
>>322033478
>not save scumming event days
Why would you do that to yoursef?
Two autistic kids team up to save the future from a clown and a rabbit that lives on the moon.
>>322027616
Bioshock
>>322027179
Donkey Kong Country
>>322027674
Yoshis island
>>322033048
Mario rpg
Some jerk with experimental tech runs around southern Russia beating up X-Men and other gay Russians to steal some bank account information to be super-rich.
>>322027712
soc
>>322035684
Dark Cloud 2?
You are a military leader with a squad of retards who throw rocks and bump into each other.
>>322028194
>tfw too hard
Easy mode :Ayylmao
You get cucked and die, then your kid gathers an army of children to kill everyone before the ancient evil awakens.
>>322037240
XCOM
A few I've been playing recently.
>not a single redeemable character except the main antagonist
>outdated turn based combat
>world map is poorly designed, only an overhaul would fix it
>sequel to a yume nikki ripoff
>you're a powerful wizard but you can't move more than 5 feet to the left or right
>the devs were so lazy that they made the bugs features and gave you tools to exploit them
>everyone is lying to you so you have no fucking idea what's going on
>you fall
>that's it
>>322037797
Yes
>>322037940
>you fall
>that's it
Alternating lowercase and capitals A's
>>322037940
>you're a powerful wizard but you can't move more than 5 feet to the left or right
Solstice?
>>322026010
City of heroes?
Asshole has a mental breakdown then maybe kills himself or leaves.
>>322032249
Muramasa
>>322038402
silent hill
>>322023973
I can't make Bfront II sound shitty.
>>322038502
you got it.
>>322023845
>pixels
>roguelite dungeon sidequest
>pokemon ripoff system
>Main story is literally AN ANCIENT EVIL HAS AWAKENED/YOU ARE THE CHOSEN ONE
>Bad guys are evil just for the sake of being evil
>muh legendary sword meme
>muh sliding block puzzles
>one of the characters gets cucked hard halfway through the story
>the cool one dies like a bitch
>you're stuck with the meathead, the magical waifu, and a faggot
>new game + doesn't carry over your stats, but instead doubles your exp/gold
>>322038610Absolutely
>>322023845
You go to a shitty fair, end up 400 years in the past, come back, get arrested, break out, go 1300 years into the future and then travel through time some more to stop pic related from coming out of the ground.
>>322038990
Kurono Toraiga
stupid over-rated pixel garbage that's not even an hour long and is stupidly hardI want to strangle myself for saying that
>>322038990
Too easyChrono Trigger
It's actually really easy
>Ugly-ass PS1-tier environments despite being a late PS2 game
>Tank controls in an action game
>Completely repetitive, nothing but punching people for hours and hours
>PS1-tier voice acting and writing
>>322023845
Your objective is to make it to a shiny mountain in the background and this never changes the whole game. Sometimes people will join your game and won't shut the hell up.
>>322027016
Super Smash Bros WiiU
>>322039148
Undertale.
>>322034434
No, it's not CS:GO
>>322039578
Fuck you, wrong.
the fucking voice in your head betrays you at the end of the game.
>>322023845
Underpaid clone army buys it's own guns with the achievements of previous clones and itself. Has a period of working for few minutes before freezing and passing out. Are pitted against other clones in different costumes. You can buy your clone fancier looking guns with real money. This is repeated on limited maps over and over again. Giving your clone line a ranking based on how good it does. Some poor fuck have spend tens of thousands ours on this shit to git gut. Not even mentioning the poor fucks buying all the fucking skins to guns.pretty much every new FPS... CS:GO!
cringy silver haired punk needs to put on a shirt and eat something other than pizza
He proceeds to pick fights with his well groomed twin brother at a family meet up wile disputing over family heirlooms he even shoots the clown then cries when his brother isnt there anymore
>>322023845
Everything is fucking chance and a dice roll and everything is slow as shit.
Every game of matchmaking ends up with someone being shit, someone blaming them so they play worse, and someone acting as an early childhood caretaker so that you don't lose.
>>322023845
you choose 1 of six shitty characters none are american they're all some kinda foreigner...you live the life of em and in the end you don't even really know why you care about any of these characters shitty lives. you drive shitty old boats around, if you ever manage to get into a sword fight its just a shitty card game, boat battles are turn based grid shit, and you're completely at the mercy of the ocean all game. the closest thing to fast travel is an auto pilot which still takes like 20 minutes to get anywhere. a quote from a game review site said "...you could read a history book or play this game - the excitement levels are about the same."
>>322039619
Damn man...uh...is it recent?
>>322039858
it's 15 years old.
>>322039901
You?
>>322039901
Cave Story? Shit I suck at this
>>322023845
Father fucks around like no tomorrow. Kids fight to death over heritage.
Control a young boy as he uses his cell phone to run virus scans on every electronic device he can get his hands on.
>>322040005
>>322040013
Wrong. It also had a budget.
>literally indie pixelshit
>you're a deliveryman try to recover lost packages IN SPACE
>The game calls you a monster for winning because it has to be soooooo fucking deep
>>322023845
Everyone is retarded. Your bosses hate you. The gods hate you. The graphics hate you. The controls hate you. You'll hate you.
You have to settle an inheritance dispute.
>>322027445
>I didnt play Lost Odyssey
>>322040480
I would if it came out on a relevant console
>>322023845
Work for nothing the game.
>>322023845
You're the pedestrian driver in every racing game, driving across Eurofagland.
>>322040609
Animal Crossing
>>322040095
Is it a GB game?
>>322040819
here's the answer.
>>322023845
fuckin grind your character till max lvl and grind fuckin bosses then when you a faggot for shiny gear or when you a cool guy you go pvp and get fucked by unbalanced incompetent designers, if you are extra retarded buy yourself some shiny pet for 20$
>>322023845
Drug addicts try to kill you the entire tims
It's just a shitty minecraft clone but in 2D.
>>322040920
hey metal slug has GOAT pixel art, that's cheating
you have amnesia and you have to shoot things and the controls are really floaty
