>be me
>watch Driver for first time
>get obsessed over the movie
>go and buy the blu ray edition of Driver
>watch it at least 48 times in a week
>try to act like the Driver
>I start to speak when its only necessary and only answer with single words
>borrow my mothers credit card and buy a scorpion jacket, leather gloves and 20 boxes of toothpicks for $775
>I then borrow my mothers mini-van and start driving with it while listening to "Nightcall"
>decide to drive in an empty parking lot
>there is a parked truck in the parking lot
>old fat neckbeard comes out of the truck
>he looks at me
>says: "Cool jacket kiddo"
>I take 34 seconds to respond to him
>I say: "T-t-hanks s-sir"
>he then says:"Do you want to hop in my truck for a drink?"
>I just positively nod
>we are sitting in his truck
>he lays his hand on the back of my head
>he forces me to blow him
>"Nightcall" is playing on his radio
>mfw I pretend to be Driver while I blow an old fat neckbeard and "Nightcall" is playing
>>71553820
>20 boxes of toothpicks for $775
You got ripped off.
>>71553820
>I blow an old fat neckbeard and "Nightcall" is playing
kek
>>71553866
I think he meant $775 for the toothpicks AND the scorpion jacket AND the leather gloves
>driving in my honda at midnight with nightcall playing at max volume
>wearing my authentic scropion jacket and have a toothpick squeezed between my lips
>driving too fast so a cop pulls me over
>he walks up to the car and knocks on the window
>"please turn fown that music" he shouts
>can't hear him, wait 30s and say "what"
>he shouts it again louder
>i stare at him blankly for a while then turn off the music
>"son do you have any idea how fast you were going"
>"...no"
>"well you were going pretty fast I'm gonna have to give you a ticket"
>"...I drive"
>at this point the copper thinks I'm high and makes me do one of thise finger tests
>make continuous eye contact while he wags his finger around like a kike
>"I'm gonna have to ask you to step out of the car"
>open the door and step out after a lengthy stare
>"now you're gonna have to walk in a straight line here"
>throw him to the ground and bash his head with my foot
>some fat fuck in a red jacket decides to drive by right at that moment
>quickly get back in thr car and chase after him
>lose his lights as he swerves off the road and upends himself
>tries to get out of the car and run away, I stare at him deliberately for a moment then shoot him
>walk over to the car, shoot the girl inside
>loud string music emanates from the radio
>go back to my car and drive back tiward the dead cop
>for some reason my phone is now filled with Scandinavian folk music instead of synthwave
>find steve buscemi waiting for me in the cop car
>realize I'm in the wrong fucking movie
>>71554434
lmfao
Drive greentexts were the best /tv/ meme. Baneposting turned /tv/ into autism
>>71554434
kek'd
I miss this meem.
>tfw I unironically bought a scorpion jacket 'for Halloween'
>tfw I sometimes wear it and drive home slowly after hanging out with the girl I love and her husband
>There's something inside you
>It's hard to explain
>>71553820
>>71553925
Samefag.
I remember you from the last time you tried to write a driver greentext that was equally embarrassing.
>Imitating the Driver
>Not Luke
>>71555093
I still to this day occasionally bite on toothpicks
>be in convenience store at 2 am
>qt clerk ask if I want a receipt
>stare into distance
>"only if your number is on it"
>digits get
>agrees to go out for dinner
>"anon, meet my boyfriend, he loves this place"
>hear a car slide into the parking lot
>the air smells of creatine and body odor
>two double-taps ring out
>turn around
>mysterious stranger tenderly whispers into my ear
>"can't dodge the rodge"
>>71555166
>Samefag.
>I remember you from the last time you tried to write a driver greentext that was equally embarrassing.
Found the autist
>>71555524
You posted that exact picture last time too.
>>71555093
>her husband
You should give him a wife's son
>>71554434
7/10, nice tweest
