The OFFICIAL /tv/ patrician opinions list. They cannot be argued against or else you expose yourself as a full pleb. Only TRUE cinematic patricians may add onto this list.
Let us begin:
- Plot is for babies; it is a visual medium, to be used as so
- Star Wars is for 5 year olds
- Stanley Kubrick is a slight step above pleb but nowhere near patrician
- Genre films are trash and are to be treated as such
- Christopher Nolan is pleb tier director; none of his work reaches film status and often time delves into flick tier
- European Cinema is objectively better than other any cinema
- Women cannot truly enjoy a film properly
- Book adaptations are pleb trash fit for only the unoriginal
- Steven Spielberg is intro to pleb tier; no argument can be made against this
- Animation is for children; kill yourself if you enjoy any of the sort and you are older than 10
- CGI is below pleb tier and is automatic filth
- Dialog is for babbies; it is a visual medium, to be used as so
- Naturalism is best style; everything else is commercial shit that are dated before they even leave the editing room. The first film that will be shown to patrician extraterrestrials will be from the realism school
- Remakes and sequels are cancer; no exceptions
Again, only TRUE cinephiles can add onto this list accordingly.
>>70975933
what the fuck does kino even mean
>>70975967
"I'm autistic."
>>70975933
Stale pasta is stale
The last film I watched was Sunset Blvd. Spew your garbage opinions about the film at me.
I'll make the first contribution to the list.
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
>>70975933
Sniper: Special Ops
>>70976085
>>70976086
Starting with the right foot.
>>70976050
>Sarris put Billy Wilder in the canon
For a guy who started auteurism in the US, he sure made some boneheaded moves.
Only patrician will recognize what pic related is.
Who /Dunkaccino/ here?
Dismissing CGI is an obvious indication of butthurt manchild pseudo-intellectualism. CGI allows for the realistic portrayal of events and circumstances which would otherwise be impossible to put on screen without making an unintentional comedy.
>>70976085
It says kino club not /v/ movie buff club
Any true patrician would find that rigidly accepting some other persons predilections and proscriptions as immuteable fact is total anathema.
I'm afraid the only people you'll find agreeing with you OP are plebs pretending to be patrician.
>>70976274
Name 3 patrician films that use extensive CGI
post your true kino webms /tv/
>>70976407
Nothing about this sequence is kino anon. I sense you might be out to prank us with an ironic post. Am I correct in this assumption?
![[Futurama4] CG - The Keep_10.webm](https://i.imgur.com/xpsCrma.jpg "[Futurama4] CG - The Keep_10.webm")
>>70975933
This is not any old autism, this is pretentious hipster autism.
>>70976316
sucker punch
speed racer
pacific rim
>>70976407
>>70976196
you fucking know I am
>>70975933
You can always tell who the actual insecure plebs are because they start threads like this.
>>70976802
t. insecure pleb
>>70976837
>he actually responded
>>70976721
>No
>No
>No
You're bating or don't know what patrician films are like. Which is it?
>>70976892
thread wont bump itself my friend
>>70976974
i hope you're not op
op can't bump threads
>>70976960
2deep4u
Absolute cinema.
>>70977004
bump
>>70977033
Weak bait, nice dubs.
>>70975967
Some shit meme when you ironically like somethng
>>70977067
This is frightening
>>70977004
no i'm not
I think OP's rules are pretty much there.
Curious, is this kino? It's my personal fave...
>>70975933
OP I feel personally embarrassed for you.
>>70977625
Oops.
>>70977541
That feeling you have is called "butthurt" and it has nothing to do with him.
>>70976407
>>70976311
>>70976085
>>70976723
>>70976837
>>70977372
Attention fellow /tv/ posters, these are NOT, I repeat, NOT kino
Can you imagine the disgust you would feel if you were talking to some people and one of them unironically used the term Kino?
If /tv/ was a person he would get blasted in the face so many times just for being a weird nerd.
>>70979202
this is true for every 4chan board, except for /trv/
>>70975933
So that means Only God Forgives is kino
>>70976086
Shit
>>70979339
That is both a genre film and features extensive use of CGI.
>>70979427
>That is both a genre film
What genre?
>and features extensive use of CGI.
Uhhhhh no. BvS is extensive.
kino bump
>>70976546
>MY PEOPLE ARE MURDERED?
So was Molasar jewish or did he just pretend to make the old man help him?
>>70980795
I think in some sense he was a Jewish golem.
>>70975967
It's short for "aбcoлyт кинoгpaфи" or lè kinèmàtógràphié màgnifiquè. It's a movement started by Дaви́д Áбeлeвич Кáyфмaн in order to achieve the creation of an authentically international absolute language of cinema – ABSOLUTE KINOGRAPHY – on the basis of its complete separation from the language of theatre and literature.
>>70975933
>- Plot is for babies; it is a visual medium, to be used as so
That depends on the film.
>- Star Wars is for 5 year olds
sure
>- Stanley Kubrick is a slight step above pleb but nowhere near patrician
depends on the movie
2001 is good, dr strangelove not so much
>- Genre films are trash and are to be treated as such
objectively wrong
>- Christopher Nolan is pleb tier director; none of his work reaches film status and often time delves into flick tier
aside from the autistic meme language sure
>- European Cinema is objectively better than other any cinema
no, American cinema is best.
>- Women cannot truly enjoy a film properly
*tips fedora*
>- Book adaptations are pleb trash fit for only the unoriginal
cringe
>- Steven Spielberg is intro to pleb tier; no argument can be made against this
really bold statement dude
>- Animation is for children; kill yourself if you enjoy any of the sort and you are older than 10
objectively wrong
>- CGI is below pleb tier and is automatic filth
objectively wrong
>- Dialog is for babbies; it is a visual medium, to be used as so
dude I just watched my first Stan brakhage movie now let me tell you how much I spurn traditional narrative cinema lmao cringe
>- Naturalism is best style; everything else is commercial shit that are dated before they even leave the editing room. The first film that will be shown to patrician extraterrestrials will be from the realism school
'no'
>- Remakes and sequels are cancer; no exceptions
'no'
>>70975967
It means "cinema" in German and Russian (and possibly other languages). At least in German it refers to both the location (theater) and movies "for the big screen" (as opposed to TV movies), while the medium itself is "Film".
So people go to the "kino" to see a "kinofilm", the release date is the film's "kinostart" etc.
Fuck, I'm gonna use
>kinofilm
on here now.
Ironically it'll trigger autists as wrong, although it's not only the legit term, but does sound almost pedantic to any German, since nobody says "Kinofilm" in everyday conversation (just Film).
>>70981750
Come on, mate. You're actually answering pasta
>>70979479
Crime film. And uuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh yes.
>>70982009
>I was just pretending to be retarded
implying you don't actually believe this when you copy paste it
>>70982445
??
I'm not OP. And I wouldn't start a thread as cancerous as this one is. Fucking anti-art fags
>>70982541
Haha triggert.
>>70982541
The point of a thread like this is to start discussion. I doubt even the person who wrote the text in the OP believes every point.
>>70982813
I guarantee he believes most of it but is exaggerating his beliefs and using inflammatory language to get people to respond
>plot is for babies, it is a visual medium
So according to your standards, a great movie could consist of a guy literally sitting in a chair staring blankly at a camera for 3 hours with proper framing and cinematography.
>>70982937
It could be. But if you say 'the plot was predictable,' you have outed yourself as a plen. It doesn't say anything about the cinematic quality of the kinofilm.
>>70982974
Plot is part of the film though
>>70983003
It's not specifically cinematic, though. Plot exists in novels, plays, oral stories, etc.
>>70983065
That doesn't mean you shouldn't consider it when an evaluating a movie.
>>70983086
But it does show you don't know how to talk about things that are specifically filmic.
>>70982974
You just outed yourself as a moron though.
Plot is just as important as every other aspect in the movie
>>70976735
Luis is kino acting in its purest form.
>>70983136
nope. stop considering yourself knowledgeable about film if you refuse to consider all aspects of a film, instead narrowing your scope to whatever interests you. furthermore, what is specific to film? framing is found in photography and so is composition (also in theatre).
>>70979234
the part where he is digging his brains out is maybe the most graphic thing i've ever seen
>>70983242
camera movement, editing
>>70976085
I don't understand the ending of only gods forgive.
Did he cut his arms or not?
>>70976316
Sin city. 300. Dark city.
>>70983319
So film criticism should be strictly limited to talking about camera movement and editing? brilliant
>>70975933
Chinese kino , best kino
>>70975933
>Steven Spielberg is intro to pleb tier; no argument can be made against this
we must admit that Jaws was a fucking masterpiece, though
>Dialog is for babbies; it is a visual medium, to be used as so
m-michael?
I agree with everything else
>>70975933
>- European Cinema is objectively better than other any cinema
lol
>>70983384
The thing is most critics wouldn't talk about that at all, or only superficially and not how it creates the meaning of the film
>>70983487
maybe it's just me but I think it makes much more sense to criticize people for not talking about that than to criticize people for talking about plot
>>70983525
Maybe.
>>70979234
5/7
loved it
>>70979234
I'm 10 years old and wat is this?
who unapologetically """"pleb"""" here?
fuck your boring indie arthouse flicks
>>70982036
Literally every film is a genre film
>>70984102
damn its been deleted. It was a webm of a guy in a weird bead studded poncho beside a corpse on a bench in the desert. Poncho man hacks off the hand of the corpse and begins chewing on the flesh around the wrist of the newly severed hand. He appears to be enjoying this immensely. The webm jumps to poncho man cracking open the skull of the corpse and proceeding to dig out grey matter with his hands, stuffing the brains into his mouth and slowly chewing it, then gagging and spitting it out. Another flash forward and our guy is playing with intestines, draping them on himself before digging out an organ and going to town on it. Then there's this shot where he puts on a mask and takes it off after a few moments. Then he is straddling the corpse which is now just a skeleton, presumably because poncho has stripped all the meat from the bones to play around in, and he is making out with the skull of his playmate.
I only watched the webm once and its burned into my brain. What the fuck is this from? The webm was titled "communion" but no google results yet.
>>70985143
do you know what movie it's from?
>>70985231
are you fucking baiting me or are you actually that retarded? That's what I'm asking fuckface
>>70985312
sorry i forgot to read your last sentence because i went to look it up in the archive half way through reading your description
>>70985342
did you find it in the archive? Fucked up right?
>pic unrelated. bumping with tv waifus until someone answers my question
>>70985486
yes well reading the description i thought you were talking about some sort of snuff video like 3 maniacs 1 hammer or whatever so i was relieved to see it was just a movie
>>70984819
congratulations
I think youre forgetting "narration" on your memelist
>- Stanley Kubrick is a slight step above pleb but nowhere near patrician
>>70982974
>kinofilm
kinograph
>>70985516
no its got to be from some movie, you can tell its pork he's eating
>>70986141
>>70985486
>>70985143
bump
>>70986781
FUCK YEA THUMBNAILS
>>70976085
the tree of life is awful
