/Cinema mischief/
>about to watch movie
>buy popcorn
>would you like butter with that?
>say no
>I did
>>70834565
You fucking savage
>talking about new movie
>casually mention spoilers
>sitting in theater
>guy tries to sit next to me
>I tell him it's saved for someone
>it wasn't
>tell detaild anecdote on a Samsung Kung Pao Chicken Pedo Fantasty world in an effort to pander towards fellow man children
>it's a lie
>watch 3d movie
>it says "please put on your glasses now"
>I don't
>enjoy the movie twice for the price of one
>>70834783
Dr Evil?
>>70834847
>Person behind me casually presses knee against back of seat
>want to move or say something
>I dont
>>70834919
stop posting this
>>70834565
>Young couple sit next to me
>Farts as loud as I can the whole movie
>screen says silence all phones
>make sure my keytones are at maximum volume and turn them down
>BEEEEEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeep......
>only put phone on vibrate
>be student
>get student discount with my student ID
>don't use it and pay full price
>>70834994
shat on dick
I loiter in the lobby
>yell in ebonics :
>"watch out nigga, he gunna getchu"
>"dayum das a fine ass bitch"
>"hol up homie , them crackers wanna put a cap in you ass"
>''shiiiet, he dun killed them, das a gangsta right there"
>"yea, get that poosi nigga"
>my face when they all turn to look at me and I'm white
>cashier tells me to enjoy the movie
>i don't
>>70835141
>watching a 2 hour long movie
>really want to use the bathroom to take a piss
>I don't
>sneak candy bars from home into the cinema to avoid overpaying for them
>girl next to me sees me eating one and asks if they're selling them
>they're not but I say yes anyway
>she gets up to look for one
>comes back and doesn't even look at me for the rest of the movie
>getting snacks at the kiosk
>ask for a medium popcorn
>just as the wagie puts the first scoop into the bag i say 'make that a small'
>bins the medium bag and gets me a small instead
>pay with a large denomination note
>supposed to throw your 3D glasses away at the end of the movie
>I don't
>>70835240
>supposed to throw away the one-time-use cinema underwear
>don't
>it's friday
>mom wishes me fun time with my special movie evening
>smile at her and tell her thank you, mother
>it turns out to be the worst day of the year so far, no fun at all
>in a fit of rage I throw everything out of the fridge and piss on her bed
>tell her kitty did it
>she scolds kitty and cuts of her tail
>all ended well, again
Who here /angercontrol/?
>supposed to wash off in the cinema showers before the flick
>I don't
>tell mother famous 50+ actor died today
>he didn't
>theatre brown boy tells me to enjoy complimentary theatre lobster
>I don't
when i'm done eating my snack i clean my hands in the seat
>>70835228
They count the bags, so bullshit on them throwing the medium bag away
>go to see the Dark Knight Rises at the local movie theater
>have urge to banepost irl
>shoot up the theater instead
Can anyone stop me?
>gehe ins Kino
>go to mandatory Kino shower
>just wet my hair without actually washing
>guards don't notice a thing
>>70834933
When that happens I swing my seat and hit the guy behind me
>>70834565
Why would you do this to someone?
>>70834783
I report people like you to my local cinema warden.
>Pay for a small bag of crab legs
>Get a large one
>Say nothing
>Go to the movie theater with my falcon
>Sir falcons are not allowed here
>I go in with it
>>70836970
>Pay for a large popcorn
>Get a small
>receipt says I paid for a large popcorn and some skittles I didn't get
>Do nothing
>>70835188
>Not going to the cinema in diapers
>>70837104
>Sir you have 10$ do you want extra butter ?
>Take extra butter with 20$ instead
>>70837104
>not making the ushy clean up after you
>go to theater's McDonald's
>ask for girl's happy meal
>am a guy
>hung like a horse
>see a couple getting stopped for penis inspection
>quickly hurry over so they inspect my huge dong next to the guys penis
>>70834994
He's right tho.
>Go to gay cinema
>Tranny says he wants me to do shots off his body
>I do him 50 better.
>>70837262
wadahamabata
>get a ticket for a movie that starts at 6:05
>go to 8:25 showing instead
>>70834565
>popcorn light isn't green
>eat popcorn anyways
>>70837436
You keep doing that and the popcorn police lead by Colonel kernel will eventually get you.
>Go to the cinema
>soundproof earbuds
>spend duration of the feature staring at the ceiling thinking about shitposting on /tv/
>>70837490
>Colonel Kernel
I said that outloud and started keking
>>70834565
>>70834578
>>70834654
>>70834714
>>70834774
>>70834783
>>70834847
>>70834919
>>70834933
>>70834965
>>70834994
>>70835005
>>70835064
>>70835072
>>70835087
>>70835101
>>70835141
>>70835163
>>70835171
>>70835188
>>70835207
>>70835228
>>70835229
>>70835240
>>70835440
>>70835442
>>70835495
>>70835519
>>70835682
>>70835692
>>70835781
>>70835882
>>70835900
>>70835941
>>70836713
>>70836797
>>70836867
>>70836947
>>70836970
>>70837015
>>70837056
>>70837104
>>70837154
>>70837186
>>70837221
>>70837231
>>70837258
>>70837262
>>70837286
>>70837383
>>70837436
>>70837490
>>70837504
What the hell I don't remember this happening in any movie or film
>>70837490
This, I had to ride his dick in front of everyone it was pretty embarassing
>have to poo
>don't use inlaid seat toilets
>>70837578
watch more kino
>>70837578
>he watches flicks, mere glib fascimiles
>>70837578
please stop quoting every post in a thread
>>70834565
>buy hot dog
>ask for butter on it
>>70837578
>get excited someone replied to my post
>it's (You)
>buy small soda
>dump it out
>fill cup with butter for my crab legs
>lube floor behind me with butter as i leave the theatre
>it a lebbit gets triggered by board culture episode
>>70834565
DEVILISH
E
V
I
L
I
S
H
