ITT: paid reviews for movies
>pic related
Imdb:6.9
Audience score:55%
Critics score:90%
Just saw it with my dad and I hyped him this movie since i saw 90% but after the movie we were both surprised how shit it was. Any other examples?
you and your dad have shit taste
>>69741346
Nah you and your dad are just plebs.
>>69741346
is this a very bad game of spot the pleb
ITT: Everyone should have bad taste like me and my gay dad
I really loved how old school that movie was, it had a 70s horror pacing, the atmosphere getting more and more dark and dreadful was such a pleasure to see, I honestly think it's just a throwback to old-school horror.
is he your real dad or just your mom's bull?
Instead of insulting can any of you plebs actually explain how is this movie decent at all let alone good?
Or is this some /mu/ syndrome of unironically liking shit movies and thinking they are good?
Do you really think it was shit, or just not what you expected OP? If you think it was bad, what were the things (preferably other than the plot) that you didn't like?
>>69741487
I thought the scenery, acting, atmosphere were all really nice. I also enjoyed the dialogue.
>>69741346
your dad is a loser retard and you are obviously carrying his torch.
>>69741487
Name an element of the movie that wasn't good.
>>69741487
This movie is literally a pleb filter
Acting, cinematography, script and directing were all great.
It has alot of depth without the events being ambiguous whilst remaining utterly creepy and not relying on cheap scare tactics.
If a better movie comes out this year I will be very surprised
>>69741623
He propably saw that it was a horror and expected the kind of horror we've been seeing for the past decade but actually done well.
>>69741346
But anon, it was a good movie.
>shoestring budget
>paid reviews
No, you and your dad just have shit taste
>>69741784
>my "opinions" align with the leftist agenda cuck machine (the same people who are defending new ghostbosters) therefore I have the correct taste
>>69741346
>It's a industry wide conspiracy! Everyone's in on except me!
>>69742030
That's hardly a stretch. The conspiracy isn't even hidden these days. It's all on the surface. Make a dogshit flick with feminist themes and the critics will fly the flag.
>>69741716
But it wasn't creepy or deep at all. Only the awesome setting and cinematography were any good.
Fucking Black Death did this movie better: whole movie, is it really magic or is it just assholes in the woods?
Plot was nowhere to be found, literally knew after 10 minutes that girl will survive and there was not a single thing special about plot of this movie that I never saw before in horror movies. Dialogue was cringeworthy as fuck, them mumbling religious shit isn't "quality" dialogue. Cinematography and acting were fine but not above average at all. Movie wasn't creepy even 1% percent. It wasn't scary, nor disturbing nor had creepy atmosphere. It was boring as fucking hell. My dad was yawning halfway through while I was waiting for this movie to actually starts being interesting which it never happened.
Everyone talks how great movie is while noone can explain how is it great.
>>69742272
Well have fun at the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles with your retarded dad.
>>69742272
>>69741346
>plot fags
Looking forward to seeing you fags shitting up the BCS threads when the 3rd season comes back on air!
>>69742383
Nice memes fucktard.
I see this movie is liked by faggots who saw 5 horror movies in their life which were all made past 2010 and they think this movie is good because it's "special" and not like Insidious,Conjuring and Sinister which are only other horror movies they saw and they were all shit because of muh jumpscares.
>>69742272
>them mumbling religious shit isn't "quality" dialogue.
They were extreme puritans, the dialogue felt very authentic to the setting and characters, in what way was the dialogue not quality, because people didn't speak in quotable catchphrases?
Even if you went into it wanting meme dialogue you got "Wouldst thou like to live deliciously" which will probably be one of the most memorable lines of the year.
>>69742518
>I see this movie is liked by faggots who saw 5 horror movies in their life which were all made past 2010
Except it was the casual audiences who disliked it and the professional critics who praised it.
You and your dad are cucks.
>>69742795
Yeah I watched probably 100+ horror movies together with my dad, let alone watching them on my own so I honestly doubt we are "casual" audience of horror movies.
>>69742837
Did you all grow up without father figure and that's why you are all so mad?Hopefully your mothers bull treated you well lads.
>>69742913
>Yeah I watched probably 100+ horror movies together with my dad
>Saw, Scream, Halloween...the list goes on!!!
>>69741346
A family of plebs
>>69741346
>but after the movie we were both surprised how shit it was.
Not everyone can live deliciously, Anon.
>>69742913
>Did you all grow up without father figure and that's why you are all so mad?
No, my dad just wasn't a cuck.
>>69742272
What exactly do you find scary, creepy, or disturbing?
What Horror movies do you and your gay dad like?
>>69742383
kek
>>69742518
>I see this movie is liked by faggots
I thought your Dad didn't like it?
>>69742174
I dont understand how you could not find the witch creepy. What Horror movies do people actually think are good for comparison?
>>69742913
My father still has an active role in my life but he's always had taste
>>69742913
I never said you were a casual necessarily. I said that casual audiences disliked The Witch, which makes your conclusion that the people who praise this movie are horror plebs demonstrably incorrect.
The Witch got a cinemascore of C - which is very low. Any hype this movie got came from the cinephile community, not the mainstream. In your case perhaps you disliked it because you went into it expecting a horror movie and instead got something that more resembles a period setting family drama. The film is of a high quality on pretty much every level. It sounds like you just wanted it to be a different movie.
>>69742565
God tier line. That whole scene was excellent.
>>69742952
Can you recommend me some great horror movies you saw m8?
>>69743120
From horror movies I like Alien, Shining,The Thing, first Halloween.From newer ones Conjuring and It Follows were fine I guess. Normally most horror movies are quite bad and I watch them for one or two quality scenes.
>>69743221
You sure explained how this movie is good. Faggot :^)
>>69743271
What kind of movies does your father like?
>>69743302
Yup at first I thought I also just had different expectations than what I actually got. Then I went to check "critics" review online and they were all praising this movie for being best horror experience in long time and how creepy this movie was.
>>69743481
>From horror movies I like Alien, Shining,The Thing, first Halloween
Kill yourself and your gay dad
>>69743481
Alien and the Thing are not scary at all.
They're Alien-kino but not scary
>>69741346
killstreak confirmed enemy pleb inbound
Any horror movie that modern audiences love is shit. Thats a good indication that the witch isnt for retarded normies
>>69743481
I thought the movie was very creepy but at the same time it doesn't follow the conventions of your traditional modern horror movie. To me it was a very immersive period piece with a great sense of creeping dread. It didn't really have the "scare moments" as such as a general feeling of unease. If I call it a horror film then it's definitely one of the best I've seen in a long time but at the same time I think that label may give false expectations.
It's not as good as Alien, The Shining or The Thing but I thought it was better than It Follows (great aesthetic and premise but really ran out of steam at the end for me with the pool shit) and especially The Conjuring which had good production values but was completely dull to me since possession movies are so overdone. I appreciated that the Witch gave me a setting and subject matter that was relatively underepresented in the genre.
It's amazing how horror has come to such shit it is considered as a separate thing from film.
Like when you go to see a horror, the majority of the audience judges the movies completely different from an action/thriller/drama. It's like all the movie elements dissapear and the only measurement of quality of the movie is how many times you got "spooked". It's almost like a ride, not a movie for them.
The studio had to market The Witch as a scare horror movie so more people would see, and when they actually see it they don't care about the family relations and character development and the production design etc, they just want to get some loud noises after a few seconds of silence every now and then.
It's really interesting. And really really sad
>>69741346
> saw it with my dad
Mistake one, sort of film to be watched alone
> shit it was
being shit seems easy these days, does anyone take movies for art these days?
>>69744563
>the only measurement of quality of the movie is how many times you got "spooked". It's almost like a ride, not a movie for them
All of this. Jump scares, and found footage garbage like paranormal activity has destroyed what making a horror movie even is. It still has to function as a movie
>>69744726
The Witch is just as much of a non-movie as shit like Paranormal activity. It's a fairground ride. Only difference is instead of "muh jumpscare" moments it has "muh art" moments.
The audience for both films are retards. Only difference is that one wears backwards baseball caps and the other wears scarves and fedoras. The elite know both films are trash,
is black phillip an homage to patrice oneal?
>>69744865
No, the witch is a movie that has a plot. You dont have to love it but its miles better than other generic modern horror movies
>>69744865
okay give actual one argument why is the movie trash for you, not just "yeah it's boring and 2arty"
also please don't use the term "The elite" ever again, it's pretty cringy
>>69741346
Best pleb filter in years
>>69741346
You and your dad are just ultraplebs
>>69744976
Plot is hardly a legitimizing factor. The highest level of cinema completely throws narrative to the wind. Not that I'm implying that paranormal activity is in that category. I'm just pointing out that you're a clueless millennial with a head full of second hand cinematic memes. The Witch had no more precious muh plot than a flick like Sinister. Only difference is that it was made to harvest entry level "film buff" fedora tips rather than to make normies jump. They're both non-cinema for different reasons. Plot doesn't even factor into it.
>>69741848
What's your home board, friend?
>Somebody has an opinion I don't agree with that must mean that they were paid off to say good things about the movie
Stick to video games.
Everyone who hates this film is just a filthy Normie. Everything about it was well done, the acting, the directing, the writing, it was all amazing .
>>69744978
The hat the boy was wearing was a complete anachronism.
The flying effect at the end was bad.
You may think these are nitpicks but in a film that clearly aims to immerse you in a time period points like these are the difference between being a film and being an embarrassing pretend film piece of shit.
>>69745237
this desu senpai
>>69741346
>Any other examples?
Half of the movies on Metacritic with 80+ score.
>>69741716
>acting was great
>>69741346
Great atmosphere and acting. Last 10 minutes are literally perfect.
>tfw you will never live deliciously
>>69745369
>I only understood one in five words it was bad
>>69744865
>you guys fedora tipping fags
>I am the elite
wew dude
>>69745256
if that are your strongest arguments why the movie is bad then the movie should atleast be an 9/10 for you
Hell, I have even for the biggest masterpieces bigger complaints then one prop and a 5 second scene
>>69745369
>literal non-actors
>have them talk in heavy enough britshit that no one can understand them
>bravo 10/10 performances so authentic and empowering
How do I know that it was all LEFTISTS praising this heap of shit?
>>69745256
>muh CGI
Stick to capeshit, pleb.
>>69745142
so you watch nothing but true arthouse because that are the only good movies that are out there?
12 Angry Men is a bad movie right?
Why do people feel the need the express extreme opinions on this site that they don't even agree on really
>>69741848
Throwing around the old leftist agenda meme.
>>69741346
>The /v/ vitch
>>69745424
The film is a 2/10 at best. The whole thing is predicated on being a convincing depiction of a time period. Fail at that and the entire movie is a complete and resounding waste of time.
It's such a piece of shit that I wish everybody who was involved in the production would get terminal cancer. Especially the primary cast including the young children. They all deserve to die. I want to take my blade and then cut around the face of the lead girl. Then I'd start to peel her face away from the front of her skull. Using my blade to cut away any connective tissue. I'd drape the face over my own and then kill her family family.
I hated this piece of shit. Every molecule of my body was vibrating and screaming out in rage. It was like my flesh was filled with ants. Writhing and chewing on my flesh from the inside out.
>>69742112
I just watched a Q & A with the director and he said he had no feminist view in mind when writing the film. That's just people's own view. But with dealing with witchcraft of the era women's roles are going to be an inevitable subject.
>>69745142
>he thinks narrative is thrown away by avant garde films
Way to spot a pleb
>>69745553
>12 Angry Men is a bad movie right?
It's entry level "film buffcore". Artistically pedestrian and by my standards that means it is a bad movie. Good art reviles. A good film doesn't end with audience applause. It ends with audiences turning their guns on their families and then themselves.
>>69745645
>The whole thing is predicated on being a convincing depiction of a time period.
It's actually just a horror movie about the devil fucking with a family. Nice blog post, though.
>>69741346
>credible sources say it's good
>casual, teenage, plebeian majority say it's bad
LE EBIN COINCIDENTZ
It's a modern horror movie that normies found boring. It means it's automatically good.
I bet you can't wait for The Conjuring 2™ OP! Now with more pretending to be a true story than ever before!
>>69745645
you still didn't give one actual argument why is the trash for you. Just one please.
An actual argument that could be written in a review, not just "this scene is bad"
I am not even implying the movie has no flaws, but I saw you list practically none of them
>>69745719
You are the guy who trashes prisoners as "imdbcore entry level film buff shit"? It's not going to work you autist
>>69745796
Conjuring was actually decent as far as Blumhouse horror goes. Plenty worse films to name drop.
>>69745659
You know why it's feminist shit even if the director denies it? Because it's clearly made by somebody who thinks there was something unfair by how the girl was treated by society in that time. That is FEMINIST you dense fuck. The non-feminist version of this film would have revelled in every second of the slut's punishment. I want to see this director made by somebody smart enough to know that she got everything she deserved.
>>69745719
>"A good film doesn't end with audience applause. It ends with audiences turning their guns on their families and then themselves."
okay people leave this thread and stop feeding the troll please
>>69745823
>trashes prisoners as "imdbcore entry level film buff shit"?
Everybody on this board who has even a modicum of cinematic intelligence would reach that conclusion. You're going to need to be more specific.
>>69745659
>What is death of the author
>What is contextual vs intertextual criticism
>>69745778
>appeal to authority
What next? Out yourself as a cuck liberal?
>>69745813
The production department didn't give a shit. The girl was ugly. I recognized the dad from the office. If the film had artistic integrity it would have used no names. Showing a baby penis is depraved and pornographic. The goat had a faggot voice.
I could name minor details from this film that make it bad all day. Maybe they're not that bad on tehir ehhemem own but add them all togetehr and hyoju have a shit ajfit etier dfilm
>>69745904
Those are the specific descriptors you gave on those posts, you are not fooling anyone.
Not actual criticism, just vague and redundant adjectives.
>>69746035
>but add them all togetehr and hyoju have a shit ajfit etier dfilm
Are you ok? I think this film effected you on a psychological level.
![The VVitch (2015).mkv_snapshot_01.20.58_[2016.05.17_22.56.39].png](https://i.imgur.com/CdaKLiW.png "The VVitch (2015).mkv_snapshot_01.20.58_[2016.05.17_22.56.39].png")
It was boring and while it could've at least passed as some paranoia shit the moronic ending just ruined everything. If you want a good horror movie watch Babadook.
>>69741848
do they teach you how to meme arrow on reddit now?
>>69746137
>Babadook.
JHAHAHHAHGAHAH BABAKEK VBABAKEK BACA KEK
ANOUTHER SHILKLED MEMEM RELEASE JUST AS BAD AS THE WITHC.
MEKME HORROR:
BABAKEK
IT EMEMS
THE SHITCH
WHO KNOWS WHGAT SHOILLED FHIT FELST NEXT YEAR WILL HAEV IN STORE FOR US.#
BHABAKEK WAS SJW: THE FLICK. PURE HGAR
I HAEU YOU KATIE STUPID SLUT WHORE.
>>69745844
>revelled in every second of the slut's punishment
When the hell was the character or anyone being a slut?
This movie in part examines the mindset of people in colonial America who actually believed in witchcraft. Part of that is in fact how people were unjustly treated in society for being what was considered an outcast but they truly believed and feared this shit. The movie doesn't take a side it simply shows you what it would be like living in constant fear of evil and under a puritan lifestyle.
>>69746137
>moronic ending
>watch Babadook
I'll take Oxymorons for 600, Alex.
>>69746198
Reminder that raging against reddit is literally theopposite of reddit behavior. That post is a noble 4chan fighter holding his rifle toward the reddit/leftist culture cancer and then pulling the trigger.
>>69746217
Why do underaged kids always get mad when someone mentiones babadook? 2adult4u?
>>69746247
>The movie doesn't take a side
Do you think the modern leftist director thought the treatment of the girl was fair? Of course not. Even if the narrative of the film doesn't take a direct stance on the matter it's still evident through the language of the film that the director thinks females being oppressed is a bad thing.
>>69746217
>WHO KNOWS WHGAT SHOILLED FHIT FELST NEXT YEAR WILL HAEV IN STORE FOR US.#
Raw (Grave)
>>69746277
babadook video game capeshbit babbymode hgorror
No one has ever praised it who wasn't infantile about cinema. Show me a man who has mutilated himself for the art of film who has a positive word to say about that shitheap
POOOPY POOIOPT PIOOOOOOOOOOOOO MVIEW
That flick is praised soley by latte sipping nu-male KEKED DASASJAJWSMNWS JX
Millenal
>>69743360
It's amazing how the line is totally a meme, but somehow comes out creepy in the actual context
>>69746035
epic trolling dear friend
>The movie is bad because an actor is ugly to me and some faggot voice
Top notch review, your opinion is so wide and full of constructive criticism
2/10 for making me reply to all this, edgy gives you a lot of (You)'s to satisfy you I see
>>69741623
Not him, but not showing full frontal Thomasin was a travesty.
>>69746332
Is it a good thing?
Yeah the director like everyone else probably thinks that the often time brutal deaths of people was horrifying and wrong but I think you are putting too much of a political view on a film that doesn't really show it.
>>69746462
She was an ugly feminazi bitch. Even if she was naked right in front of me I wouldn't look at her or rape her. I'd just pull the trigger. No woman has sexual power over me. I have all the power. They are worthless filth. I'd saw off her legs and throw them around.
>>69746473
>Is it a good thing?
I think it's a good thing.
>>69741346
paid reviews =/= SJW cultural marxists liberal bloggers who now are considered film critics by webiste ratings
If you trust movie internet websites you are a fucking dumb retard you fatfuck.
>>69746559
Can you explain?
>>69746518
You forgot to attach a poopoo peepee pic
>>69746393
>infantile about cinema
>Show me a man who has mutilated himself for the art of film
You should leave your basement sometime.
>>69743018
this.
>>69746579
Woman have been a scourge on our society since the dawn of time and deserve to suffer for their crimes.
>>69741346
One reviewer posted a bunch of Witch stuff on his twitter.
His followers asked why he didn't review it.
"They asked us to tag and share pictures rather than write reviews this time"
>>69743524
Alien was probably way scarier at the time when most people's conception of aliens were little green ayylmaos, but it hasn't aged well in terms of scares.
The Thing still works for me because it focuses mainly on the paranoia of the characters and utter inhospitable isolation of the setting rather than the paranormal elements, and Carpenter was on point with the direction so the tension is so palpable it practically leaks from the screen.
>>69746598
Nice meme argument. I am the elite. Educated, worldly and beautiful. In peak form both mentally and physically.
The /v/edditors end up at the doorstep of cinema through a lack of ability. I am here through choice. I have seen the black infantilized heart at the core of our society through extensive social experience, and now I see the only cure is to live my life through art devotion and cinematic contemplation.
>>69741487
They can't because it's not good. They confuse aesthetic tropes like muh natural light for a good film.
Just like plebs confuse it for being bad because of muh no story.
The truth is that it's just mediocre, hence the completely disinterested reception from audiences and critics.
>>69741716
High Rise already came out.
If this solid C+ is the best you see all year then I feel bad for you.
>>69746872
why is it mediocre?
>>69741487
- possibly best use of child actors I've ever seen
- not entirely predictable; obviously some parts were predictable, but for instance when Caleb came back it was totally unclear whether he'd kill the family, get better, or die
- no over-reliance on visual aspects. It's fucking awesome how Satan was literally in the room with thomasin, and he was never even really shown
- leaves enough room for speculation without there being any holes in the plot: was thomasin doomed only when she signed her name in the book, or before that? Was Caleb's profession of his love for God right before his death genuine or a mockery?
>>69746872
in one post you say absolute trash
in the other 2/10
now it is mediocre
maybe after some more replies it becomes decent for you
>>69746872
I also noticed a lot of praise for this film comes from the same quarters as the praise for Babadook or It Follows, the former being mundane and the latter being equally as shallow as The Witch with a huge base of much younger fans who haven't watched a lot of movies, horror or otherwise.
Reminds me of how people my age splooged all over Tarantino but older film geeks rolled their eyes.
>>69746914
High Rise was the C+. Wheatley still hasn't topped Kill List.
>>69747034
You realize there are more people in the thread than just you and me right?
>>69746518
>>69746964
A completely shallow and lazy concept/script coupled with extremely high quality production quality balancing out to mediocre.
>>69747075
I haven't seen babadook, but you're connection between the witch and it follows is completely misguided. It follows was a nice idea and a decent movie. The witch is so much more and represents some of the best that all of film has to offer.
>>69747273
>The witch is so much more and represents some of the best that all of film has to offer.
I don't have enough laughing frog images saved for this one.
All I can say is that even at the age of 9 years old I was already far smarter than someone like you will ever be.
>>69747111
the majority of those posts use underage terms like "muh" or "elite" or "2arty" etc so I hoped only one person can be so edgy
>>69747189
Your main criticism is that it's not original or deep enough?
>>69746518
>No woman has sexual power over me
Ahaha, faggot
>>69747090
I'll put it this way - High Rise is every bit as good as the book, which I love, but which many people would say is only a C+ to begin with.
I thought he did an amazing job with it.
Also Kill List goes from an A to a B because of the last act and especially the finale.
I can't wait to see what Wheatley does next. I thought he sort of had a niche, and didn't expect him to be able to pull High Rise off, but I thought he nailed it and it was way outside of what he had been doing up to that point.
>>69747273
Well, it was more to do the audience of the fims.
The Witch is obviously far, far better than It Follows.
Like I said - It was a middling concept and "story" made extremely well.
If that team works with a top notch script or adaptation next it would probably be fantastic, and it's one of those fims where I didn't think it was very good overall but I'd be excited to see what they make next.
>>69747407
I haven't read the book but as a standalone movie I thought High Rise was pretty unsatifying beyond the technical level. Maybe with the context of the novel the experience is better.
>>69747387
I mean...not far off honestly.
It's like a half fleshed out idea scribbled on the back of a napkin. Or a great idea for a type of movie...but like the idea of creating an interesting script for the foundation was boring and they skipped straight to the production design.
>>69747544
No. Not really. A lot of people have been making this observation, and nearly all of the complaints are things that are all inherent in the book too.
It's one of those situations where going back and reading the book isn't going to help make the film any better.
What I liked so much about it was that he actually got the tone of the book completely right, unlike adaptations of say Kurt Vonnegut.
The thing is plenty of people don't like Ballard's writing anyway.
Sort of reminded me of Inherent Vice (which I didn't like). Any problem I had with it was all there in the source material too.
>>69747602
I get what you're saying about the script and concepts, but I think the point was to stay as close to the dialect and folklore of the time as possible, and maybe as a consequence the script and concepts do not come off as interesting or original as they could have been? For a horror movie about old folklore witches I think this is the best we are going to get.
>>69741346
it was not shit, but was overated and the ending was stupid.
OP here.
I still think this movie is shit but will rewatch it tomorrow since you faggots made some good points and convinced me into giving it another shot.
>>69747959
>admitting defeat
Little impressionable baby boy
>having a plebeian father
tough luck anon
>>69747843
No problem with the dialogue. It's just that you have films/plays/books treading similar ground that have more fleshed out ideas with more interesring stories to tell. Like The Crucible or Witchfinder General (can't wait for the probable trainwreck that will be Refn's remake - in a perfect world he would give a big studio budget to The Witch people and produce it for them).
It's probably hypocritical of me since I like shit like All The Real Girls or George Washington which basically are the indie fag romance equivalent of The Witch. For whatever reason I have more traditional expectations for horror films in regards to plot and characters.
Plus I've given worse films a free pass for simply being aesthetic experiences, like House Of A Thousand Fucking Corpses.
>>69747530
So what's an example of a good story and concept? I find it all the more impressive that they made something so oversaturated new and interesting? Do you consider Shakespeare's stories and concepts middling? They're all quite simple.
For example: wife wants husband to be more powerful. Convinced him to kill king to take his place. Doesn't work, he dies.
Or even more simple: man doesn't like other man, so tells him his girlfriend is cheating (lie). Guy lied to kills girlfriend and then kills himself when he finds out she wasn't cheating.
>>69748198
Macbeth is pretty fucking pleb tier in terms of shakespeare. The closest he came to capeshit imo.
>>69748290
Why do you say that?
>>69748198
I already mentioned two films of a similar nature right above that I felt took similar starting concepts and made them into interesting narratives.
I have no problem with simplicity. There's more to a story than plot. I just don't think there is anything more to The Witch than location/period. Most of the fear and tension derives from the directing but there isn't anything interesting going on thematically or character wise.
I'm watching it again this weekend with my girlfriend. So maybe I'll feel differently.
>>69746518
How are you shitposting from beyond the grave, Elliot?
>>69748593
Because Macbeth is shit and so is capeshit.
>>69746753
>Nice meme argument. I am the elite. Educated, worldly and beautiful. In peak form both mentally and physically.
*tips*
>>69748759
TYhatasd apsot is the oppsotie of efdedoa
>>69746965
>- no over-reliance on visual aspects. It's fucking awesome how Satan was literally in the room with thomasin, and he was never even really shown
Did you miss the pirate actor?
>>69745452
>have them talk in heavy enough britshit that no one can understand them
what? english isn't even my mother tongue, and i understood everything.
>>69748600
>nothing going on character wise
We can't really have a productive discussion of you think this. I'm pretty sure the only important decision made in it follows is when the girl decides not to try to fuck the demon into someone else. Otherwise, the movie asks nothing of human character, what it means to be good, bad, etc. the witch constantly asks such questions. Just take the son, for instance. His decision to lie to his mother and say he and his father weren't hunting, his decision to go the next morning again into the forest... Is he justified in doing those things? That's left for the audience to decide. All the characters in the witch are like real people in that they have to make real decisions.
>>69748625
>Macbeth is bad and like capeshit
>Why is Macbeth bad and like capeshit?
>because it's bad and capeshit is bad
/tv/, you never cease to amaze me.
This movie is just a giant meme and overrated as shit, patrician wannabe fags have no idea what they're talking about literally everything in this is mediocre except atmosphere. All anyone can come up with as to why it's good is menial shit like costumes and the set that has nothing to do with the plot, likely because the movie is short as hell and any fag can watch it and feel like they're part of the goat meme.
>>69748600
And why don't you tell me an example of a good story/concept? Not similar, as you already mentioned, but good, in your opinion.
>>69749125
Plot is the most plebbitora element of this medium. Plot is CHEETO DUST.
Go read some cliffnotes.
>>69749190
Oh. I thought I said they WERE good. But those.
I'm trying to think of something that isn't plot heavy or dialogue dependent.
I can't really say The New World and stuff because thats unfair comparison to a relatively low budget horror film.
If I'm thinking of something inherently creepy that uses ideas and/or atmosphere to unsettle I guess I'd go with something like The Vanishing or The Wicker Man.
>>69749755
You're talking about the 1988 vanishing, correct? What distinction do you make between its story/concept and those of The Witch?
>>69750028
Basically a thematic through line and a pay off with not necessarily "lots" of plot or even character development but lots of interesting ideas with set ups and pay offs and they all tie together in a neat package at the end.
>>69742272
You have no concept of suspense. You probably consider the movies of Kevin Smith to be high quality dialogue because its a static shot of two bozos talking for hours.
You're a moron, you have shit taste, go back to plebbit.
>>69750485
>interesting ideas with set ups and pay offs and they all tie together in a neat package at the end.
I don't see how the witch doesn't have this.
Ideas: lying, damnation, patriarchy
Pay offs: niggas die when they fuck up
Tie together: thomasin becomes witch because no other choice
>>69750849
When I realized that her becoming a Witch was "art" for embracing feminism I got fucking furious about being tricked into sitting though this propaganda shitfest. I started picking up the cups from the line of empty cups on desk and then throwing them all at the wall.
>>69750995
>her becoming a Witch was "art" for embracing feminism
[citation needed]
>>69751020
>oppressed by patriarchy the entire movie
>escapes and finds power by joining the club of empowered females in the forest
I wonder what the confirmed leftist director could have meant by this.
>>69750849
Well, I'm watching it again this weekend.
I just realized another 10/10 film it vaguely reminded me of recently - Ex Machina.
But yeah...second time might be the charm.
>>69751132
Ex Machina was way worse than The Witch
>>69751239
>Worse
Implies there was something wrong with it at all.
>>69751070
>>69750995
You're way too salty. What the director intended doesn't really matter. Sure, her transformation can be seen as a call for women to throw the men from their backs. It's also true that she made a deal with the devil, so she can be seen as completely evil as well.
>>69751921
Feminists believe that embracing evil is a positive thing so long as it is directed towards males. So even in your most redpilled scenario the SJWs still win.
>>69751070
>portrays women as selfish, deceitful, ultimately murderous and evil
>feminist
You are literally retarded.
>>69752226
This is the ultimate feminist fantasy you retard.
>>69752282
You have no idea what you're talking about.
>>69746035
>>69746217
>Lost an argument? Just start misspelling words and no one will be able to tell!
>>69741396
yes
I spotted one here>>69741346
I watched it with my dad too and he liked it. I loved it more though.
Excellent film that retards misunderstand because they view horror as some sort of cheap thrill ride, which is what it has become. When they are presented with good direction, acting, and writing they become confused and upset because it isn't the garbage that they have become accustomed to consuming. You and your father are shit eaters who have decided to try a fresh apple, and then complain that it doesn't have the same nutty consistency that you are used to with your shit. Then you begin to throw a temper tantrum on this website when you are confronted by individuals who can competently defend the movie for its artistic merit. I applaud Eggers and I cannot wait for his future films, for they are truly indicative of what can separate retarded plebs like you and your inbred, obese family from true fans of cinema.
Just seen it, what happened to the twins? And the sons prayer b4 he died was beautiful
