53 years of absolute pigshit edition
>or
Every single fucking tv story edition
Last Thread(Survival/Husbands):>>67781009
Brand new thread
>>67812060
Reminder that every era is pigshit but the absolute least pigshit is McCoy.
>>67812106
>>67812135
>>67812178
stop samefagging were not using this thread
>>67812221
>4 different posters
>samefagging
>>67812221
check the IP count yes we are
>>67800919
>>The New Dalek Paradigm will never return
>This really annoys me, the idea of the different roles had lots of potential, and there could have been another dalek civil war. At least Into The Dalek and their use in the 50th were pretty good, and they were used almost perfectly in the s9 opener
Lance Parkin wrote a very good script about the yellow Dalek (the one that Moffat told Gatiss to name "The Dalek Eternal" because he thought he'd be using it again at some point):
https://lanceparkin.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/retreat-of-the-daleks.pdf
>>67812364
What's Parkin doing these days anyway?
Reminder people thought Maisie Williams would give the show a huge ratings boost
Which companion or recurring actress has the best chesticles?
Whose have we seen and whose haven't we seen?
So I finally got around to reading this
https://imgur.com/a/K6K79
Pretty good but I think it would actually work better if it wasn't a Doctor Who story. As was getting right creeped out until the Doctor showed up, then I just thought "Oh good, it's David Tennant, he'll sort everything out." And he did. Snore. The bit withthe guy's wife being murdereddid restore some horror though, that was VNA level dark. Where was this published?I know people die in Doctor Who all the time but having someone murdered, presumably in a very traditional way and buried in the cellar for ten yearsjust felt too spooky for kids even if it's not described in detail.
Why does Oregon from Fresh Meat look like the hybrid offspring of Clara and Ashildr?
>>67812481
He wrote a pretty good Alan Moore biography a couple years ago with a lot of stuff in it about the British scifi scene
>Who will never be this fun again
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlygadz4Lmo
>>67812060
>not curse of Peladon edition
>>67812849
tfw I thought that was Luke at 0:49
>>67812849
Good
>>67812849
>the uploader has not made this video available in your country
Well fuck you too, beeb.
>>67812849
>Who will never be fun at all again
>Who will never be this grimdark and depressing again
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bB8fh4QUy-A
>>67813089
Fucking good. Best news all day.
>>67813089
>le s9 was grimdark
Nice Meme
>>67812769
>Where was this published?
in one of those Doctor Who Storybook that were published annualy.
http://tardis.wikia.com/wiki/Doctor_Who_Storybook_2007
I think they were aimed at older children.
interesting list of writers though, didn't know that Shearman wrote for the 10th doctor in spin-off-media.
>Who will never be this ambitious and hype again
https://youtu.be/qpe1Ywz8azM
>>67813089
Good riddance tbqh.
>>67813211
Good. S6 was a poo.
>>67812849
i must admit whilst RTD is shit and Capaldi is my favourite ill never be able to get that feeling of childlike excitement again
>>67813134
Literally no fun allowed: the series
>>67811690
He let slip he was once French once, the aussie thing is just because they've got a reputation for shitposting and he thinks that's funny for some reason, the guys fucking weird man best it's to just ignore him.
>>67813134
S9 was fucking dreadful m8, feel free to think it was all unicorn shit and rainbows if you like but by god was it a chore to watch.
>>67813211
Series 6 > Series9
Series 6 was shit but it never made me want to cut myself.
>>67813309
How? It wasn't any darker than other seasons.
>>67813372
I don't care if it was shit or not. I'm just saying it wasn't grimdark.
>>67813408
I missed this meme.
>>67813415
Why did it make you want to cut yourself? Are you ok anon?
>>67813451
Name me two fun things from each ep.
>>67813372
>Based Davros returns (which I will admit they completely fucked up)
>Doctor visits Skaro (which I will admit they completely fucked up)
>Doctor finds Gallifrey (which I will admit they completely fucked up)
>Rassilon returns (which I will admit they completely fucked up)
It was fun to watch through the first time imo, but I can see how a rewatch might certainly seem like a chore.
>>67813544
Davros was good though. Way better than his S4 appearance anyways. The only problem was maybe the resolution.
>>67813544
It certainly wasn't fun. Series 4 was fun. Series 5 was fun. Series 9 was shit.
>>67813585
Series 4 was the opposite of fun.
>>67813544
I disliked all this mess. Random shit piled up in Moffat's new paradigm he nicked from Mabel Pines, aka "All ideas a good ideas".
I found the generally speaking my enjoyment of S9 grew with each episode, discounting Sleep No More and Hell Bent breaking the pattern with abrupt drops.
>>67813630
Literally wrong.
>>67813630
I don't like Donna but you're delusional if you think Series 4 wasn't fun.
>>67813748
Donna was annoying. The episode were mostly boring. Rose and everyone else returning was ridiculous. It was a shit series.
>>67813544
It's quite interesting how, on paper, Series 9 should have been GOAT; yet they completely fucked up the execution so badly that almost nobody likes it. At least the Christmas special was good (horse cocks notwithstanding).
It's an incredibly good thing Moffatt is leaving.
>>67813814
>It's an incredibly good thing Moffatt is leaving.
Did you forget who was taking over?
>>67813788
The only good episodes in series 4 are depressing ones
>>67813797
That was literally only the finale. Donna was GOAT. You'd rather have another Clara apparently.
>>67813814
It's got nothing to do with Moffat but weak scripts and shit production values.
>>67813814
The opener is good and the finale's OK. It's just every single episode in-between.
>>67813870
Moffat wrote Hell Bent m8 arguably the worst script of the series.
>>67813574
I'll agree that Davros was the best he's been since classic Who, but Moffat needs to be strung up by the thumbs for destroying Skaro the moment he got his hands on it. I'm still so angry about that, my palms are sweating.
>>67813863
Yeah but at the very least Chibnall will make the show fun again.
>>67813864
Wrong. Partners in Crime and The Unicorn and the Wasp are very funny and good. And I don't like RTD nor Roberts.
>>67813180
>interesting list of writers though, didn't know that Shearman wrote for the 10th doctor in spin-off-media.
A story set on the egg, too. Interesting. Does anybody have scans?
>>67813901
>finale's OK
No.
>>67813814
>>67813953
Partners In Crime was pretty bad though.
>>67813933
Oh stop it with this meme. It wasn't THAT bad. Hell its only mistakes were Rassilon being a pussy and the retarded Me/me thing. Everything else holds.
>>67813863
I think Chinballs and Capaldi could be a fantastic pairing, I think they'd have synergy with their different approaches and produce some blindingly good episodes.
>>67813952
>destroying Skaro the moment he got his hands on it. I'm still so angry about that, my palms are sweating.
Are you serious? All that happened was the city drowned in sewage. Skaro has been fucking blown up in the past, you know?
They didn't even go "THE DALEKS HAVE BEEN PERMANENTLY DEFEATED" at the end this time, they could literally do a story straight away that is set there again. How fucking nuts must you be to get angry at this. christ.
>>67814021
No it wasn't. I don't see what you have against it.
>>67813952
What was wrong with Skaro?
>>67814034
Seeing the mighty, mythic Rassilon reduced to a blathering old cunt was one of the most satisfying aspects of the story.
>>67814043
>I think they'd have synergy with their different approaches
So Capaldi's stunning gravitas combined with Chibnall's inability to plot anything?
My main problem with season 9 is none of the two parters work as standalones. The first parts are all build up. The second parts are all resolutions.
>>67814102
Well yeah but my only complaint about it is that it wasn't Dalton playing him.
>>67814078
The adipose were stupid and felt like they were just designed to make toys, the villain was dumb and not in a fun way and the ending was basically just 10 using his sonic on a computer for like 10 minutes. It was a lame episode.
>>67814102
are you a man hating faggot man?
>>67813978
This was held in January right? God I want that thread base back again, being trapped in here with the "s9 made me depressed" autist is like fucking torture.
>>67814137
That's because the show's budget is shit and that's why series should only have 3 two parters.
>>67814137
are you fucking seriously retarded?
>>67814137
>The first parts are all build up. The second parts are all resolutions
Isn't that how two parters always are?
>>67814155
Dalton was great and all, but I didn't mind the recasting. I actually think it's cool for recurring Time Lord characters to look completely different when they return, like how Borusa was recast four times but the change in appearance was never mentioned.
>>67814168
Doesn't Donna basically kill someone in that episode by fiddling with a gizmo
>>67814175
I hate insane, murderous, fascistic dictators.
>>67814155
Getting Dalton back would have been a waste, Rassilon's only role in the episode is to be a pathetic old man who is far from his prime.
>>67814168
The adiposes weren't any stupider than the moon being an egg or sleep dust monsters. The villain was retarded but it was fun. Also that ending literally isn't true the scene lasts like what, 3 or 4 minutes.
>>67814137
>My main problem with season 9
Season 9 didn't have any two parters
>>67814034
>Oh stop it with this meme.
No, you stop it with the fucking meme meme cunt.
Hell Bent could have been an absolutely fantastic episode but it utterly fell apart minutes in when it ruined Rassilon and it became apparent that and interesting story involving the Time Lords was being sacrificed on the alter of fucking Clala.
In fact the whole Time Lords are back story comes across as entirely tacked onto a fucking nonsensical arc about a hybrid and Missy pairing the Doctor up with Clara because they're dangerous for some stupid reasons.
The Time Lords may as well not have been in it as they could have easily been substituted with a generic baddy of the week with zero impact on the story.
How anyone can think there was any good at all in Hell Bent is beyond me.
>>67814231
Yeah. She twists the pendant and then the Adipose start to come out of the lady and then the Villain is like "The Adipose have been spotted" and then they kill her.
>>67814228
That's true but I think it would have been more "shocking" if it had been Dalton's Rassilon being ridiculed and shamed seeing how he was in The End of Time. Here, he just felt like an old guy getting banished because he's senile and can't fight back.
>>67814305
>being this retarded
It was Clara's farewell story not the Time Lords' return.
>>67814305
What would you have preferred? Also what backstory?
>>67814276
That's literally the point. The strong fierce guy being reduced to a pathetic powerless man would have been better.
>>67814364
And it was fucking shit.
>>67813965
Nvm, found it.
http://www.pdf-archive.com/2014/10/09/doctor-who-storybook-2007/
>>67814364
Which was done a thousand times better in face the raven.
>>67814305
Fuck off with your Time Lords civil war. It was never going to happen, it never was the focus of the episode. Stop being assblasted and judging the episode on what you wanted it to be, but what it actually is (and no it's not shit). And I fucking hated Series 9.
>>67814380
A good episode.
>>67814469
>liking hell bent
m8
>>67814281
>The adiposes weren't any stupider than the moon being an egg or sleep dust monsters.
Yeah they were.
>The villain was retarded but it was fun
The only fun part was the scene where 10 and Donna are miming and the mates joke.
>Also that ending literally isn't true the scene lasts like what, 3 or 4 minutes.
Nope it's pretty long actually.
>no Who this year until Xmas
>Class will probably be shit
>Capaldi will probably regenerate next year
>You will never see Power of the Daleks
>DW is now Tumblr: the show
>tfw
>>67814515
>>67814305
>The Time Lords may as well not have been in it as they could have easily been substituted with a generic baddy of the week with zero impact on the story.
The point is that his friends are more important to him than the wank of the Time Lords, even though they're his own lost race. Many fans don't quite grasp this
>>67814469
>>67814544
But it was always tumblr anon.
>>67814332
Fair point, it would have been fun to see Dalton even though it would have been just a cameo. I do think Sumpter helps sell the idea of Rassilon as a fallen legend though, a man who was once great but certainly isn't any more. It doesn't feel like he's being deposed because he's old and frail, but because literally everyone on the planet is against him, though I suppose it could be read that way too.
>>67814305
>Missy pairing the Doctor up with Clara because they're dangerous for some stupid reasons
I ran away from Gallifrey because I was gonna meet this chick that the master was going to set me up with and when she died I was gonna destroy time to save her for some reasons.
Terrible episode senpai
>>67814678
I don't think they said why he left Gallifrey. Did they?
>>67814577
>desperately trying to make the Time Lords relevant to the story
Stop.
>>67814630
Besides which he'll probably be the big bad of Series 10, Capaldi said something about it being "cosmic" and I don't doubt Rassilon wants revenge now. (Maybe he's even cooking up a new race to replace the Time Lords?)
>>67814678
>I ran away from Gallifrey because
Let me stop you there familiar. The question of why the Doctor actually left Gallifrey is not answered, and the Ashildr scene in Hell Bent raises deliberate ambiguity about it (including suggesting the half human thing).
>>67814737
I think Rassilon might return but tbf Capaldi also said Maisie was cosmic. I think he just likes to use that word.
>>67814577
Huh? He didn't pick between them though. He just went ragemode that Clara anheroed trying to be too clever.
>>67814737
He said Ashildr would be cosmic too.
>>67814707
He left because he was afraid, and he was afraid because the Cloister Wraiths told him something about the Hybrid that would destroy Gallifrey. We still have no idea WHY he left, all we really have is a name for it. A future writer could reveal the true identity of the Hybrid or it could be left ambiguous forever. (My preferred interpretation is that he's half-human and the subject of the prophecy himself.)
>>67814748
The whole episode is a mess m8, probably the worst season final ever and frankly an episode Moffat should feel ashamed of.
>>67814712
Just stating facts pal, it being the Time Lords gives his decision to fuck them all off again a weight it wouldn't have were it the Zarbi.
>>67814785
>He didn't pick between them though
He sort of did, after finally making it to Gallifrey he instantly just picked up Clara then ran away again.
I CANNOT FUCKING BELIEVE THAT IN A DISCUSSION ABOUT THE MERITS OF HELL FUCKING BENT THAT NO CUNT HAS MENTIONED THE FUCKING TIME LADY GENERAL AND HER FUCKING GRRRL POWER LINES THAT JUST MADE ME CRINGE FOR THE REST OF THE EPISODE. IT COULD HAVE BEEN THE BEST FUCKING EPISODE EVER BUT AFTER THAT IT WAS DEAD TO ME.
>>67814932
calm down m8
>>67814895
>it being the Time Lords gives his decision to fuck them all off again a weight it wouldn't have were it the Zarbi.
Maybe to your mind, to mine it's an utter waste.
I thought Hell Bent was shit when I first watched it but I enjoyed it on rewatch desu. The only thing I still hate are the scenes in the Cloister which kind of drag on way too long imo.
>>67814932
Yes it was deeply obnoxious gender essentialism of the kind that is only a few steps away from 'boys will be boys' and thus 'she shouldn't have dressed like that' and the sooner Moffat stops doing it the better. That said, cry me a fucking river m8.
>>67814932
I PHUCKING KNOW, RIGHT?????
>>67814970
If you want dramatic stories about the Time Lords, there are plenty of other places you can look.
Hell Bent was shit.
End of.
>>67815220
Hell Bent was good.
Don't agree fuck off.
>>67815220
You're shit.
End of.
So how many more incarnations do you suppose they'll go through before they pick a Muslim for the role?
>>67812838
She doesn't. She looks like Margot Kidder.
>>67815270
The next Doctor will be a muslim woman in a burka
>>67815270
How do you know they already haven't?
>>67815405
So brave
>>67815192
I wanted a good end of season story that wasn't self indulgent tripe based around a character the writer obviously had some kind of crush on. Where should I look?
>>67815270
Well the next Doctor will almost certainly be either a woman, a minority or a combination of the two.
>>67815046
>bla bla gender essentialism bla bla
Fuck off, Tumblr. The reason it sucked was because it was clearly just SJW debate fodder which is inherently poisonous to any multimedia when it's clearly just tacked on to pander to faggots who use terms like Gender Essentialism
>>67815466
Nowhere. Ends of season were a mistake.
>>67815500
So you don't actually disagree with the values expressed, just the fact that they might appeal to people on a specific blogging website?
>>67815500
I think he was taking the piss desu
>>67815511
This. Now all the episodes between the Big Premiere and the Big Finale are reduced to filler - in the old show, massive events like Adric's death, Sarah-Jane leaving etc happened at random points in the series so it was an actual surprise, now even if we don't know EXACTLY what's happening (like when the Radio Times leaked pictures of Rassilon before Face the Raven had even aired... thanks for that, lads) it's obvious that the Big Event (companion leaving, regeneration, etc) will happen at the end.
>67815591
Don't get me wrong, degeneracy bothers me just as much as the next rational white cis male. I'm just saying that tacking shit like this on to pander to the mentally ill is worse than if they had actually used it as a plot point.
>>67815646
Fair enough, homeslice
>>67815764
To be fair to Moff, he killed off Amy and Rory at a fairly random spot in the series. But yeah, definitely agree with you on what he did in S09, regardless. Clala a shit.
>>67815943
No he didn't, it was a mid series finale.
There were only 5 episodes when it aired, so of course the viewers knew they would leave in the last episode
>>67815943
He killed them in mid-season finale (Right before Christmas break)
>>67815764
It's not that this is a problem, such setup is a norm, although American TV is moving away from it. It's that Doctor Who is fundamentally unsuited for epic. At least not epic as envisioned by RTD or Moffat (Although Moffat is moving into right direction - from epic to epically weird, but is lacking filter to actually make it work)
>>67815646
Dead serious senpai. Moffat's misguided sense that gender is some magic force of God that automatically compels all men to be priapic dunces and all women to be le wild goddesses, for all that he surely intends it to make young female viewers feel better about themselves, ultimately operates using the same logic that leads to shit like blaming female victims of sexual assault because "well that's just how men are right?". I would be happier with Moffat if he was either capable of a more nuanced and constructive approach to gender, or stopped bringing it up entirely (in fact I think that would please everyone).
>>67815500
Thinking isn't scary, anon. It's really fun when you give it a try.
>>67815500
>hurr fuck off with your big words tumblr sjw faggot
>Series 10 opening scene
>Twelve steps out of TARDIS smoking a cigarette
>Just finished banging River for a quarter century
>2 minute monologue describing the merits of ball gags
>Decides he needs some bro time
>Swings by Wilf's house in 1968 GTO
>Takes Wilf to pub in 2095 for a pint
>Captain Jack happens to be there shooting laser pool
>He decides to go cruising in the TARDIS with Wilf and The Doctor for shits 'n giggs
>After a dozen pints, a misty eyed Doctor brings up Roy and Amy
>Jack asks why he can't just go back in time and see them
>Doctor gets a shit-eating grin on his face and throws a switch on the console
>They pick up Rory
>Amy is passed out from a bender in which she was wandering in a hotel hallway naked
>Rory slams a half a bottle of Smirnoff
>Wilf pulls out large bag of cocaine
>Group high-five
>Series 10 confirmed bro-series
>>67816568
This is pretty much the only real problem I have with Moffat's work, but I rarely mention it because I don't want to contribute to the sheer volume of criticism he's subjected to, most of which is moronic.
>>67816568
It's why the newest sherlock sucked arse
>>67816036
>(Although Moffat is moving into right direction - from epic to epically weird, but is lacking filter to actually make it work)
I thought Series 5 was his best arc by far, not only for being the most well thought through and satisfying, but precisely because after toying with the idea of the epic it then had the actual story play out on a small scale (i.e. a shitty little museum).
>>67816783
>tfw no Mickey
>>67814932
Calm down Ahmed.
>>67815500
The General regenerating into a woman might have been pandering, the ego line was just Moffat's typical, '90s sitocm, "lol men and women" sense of humor. He does the same with female characters by having them all act slutty. Sometimes he writes Doctor Who like it's Married... With Children.
>>67815434
>>67812769
>tfw i uploaded this two years ago
feelsgoodman.jpg
How can you stand all that ego?
>>67819088
thisruinstheepisode.jpg
>>67819408
It was ruined the moment Clara was brought back
>What's something most kids have that most adults have grown out of?
>I'm not sure, Doctor...
>Hint: I haven't grown out of it yet.
>What? Are you talking about a stuffed toy?
>Good guess, but no. I'm talking about an imaginary friend. And listen, folks - these imaginary friends are no longer imaginary, and they thirst for blood. If you're not careful they'll murder you and replace you as your child's new parents. Are you terrified yet?
>>67818983
>>67819530
Still clunky
I don't know why you think you're qualified to "rewrite" series 9 when you can't even write to begin with
>>67819530
What's up with this?
>>67819530
Fuck off.
>>67819669
ANTI-S9FAG BTFO
Let's all write dumb fanfiction. Post your autistic ideas.
>>67819530
The start has gotten less snappy, and the end hasn't much improved.
Just because NuWho loves to do the "The Doctor has a mini speech declaring the concept of the episode!!!" thing doesn't mean it's fundamentally worth doing.
>>67819937
>”Oh my word,” the Second Doctor half-whines, half-moans.
>He’s almost forgotten how they ended up like this. His body’s trembling, blood rushing with adrenalin. The wet soles of his Eighth self’s boots whine against the floor… That’s right, mud, they ran through mud, there was this thing that chased them thr– Oh by stars, what a talented tongue his future has.
>”Oh no, oh crumbs…”
>Pressing him up against the console, Eight kisses his neck, making him blush. Two’s feet lock around the other’s slim waist, while his hands clutch their ship’s control board.
>”Oh, I’m a disgrace, positively depraved. Uhh…!”
>He keeps squirming. Those hands, they’re everywhere, trapped under his clothes, sliding across his skin. It’s ticklish, electrifying, it’s his own hands…!
>”This is so wrong. We really shouldn’t be doing this – I shouldn’t be…”
>Eight, lovely Eight, lets go to look at him, all doe-eyed care.
>”Do you want to stop?”
>Two, with his arched, righteous eyebrows, looks offended.
>”Heavens, no!”
>>67819937
Splink & Mcgann
>Well, he’s had sex in this body already; it had a stronger libido than earlier ones. Thus he’s gone ahead and fraternized with the natives. This shouldn’t feel new. But it’s far more exciting than anything Earth has to offer.
>What’s odd, is that memories keeps flashing by. Purposefully hidden. The Time Lords forced him to regenerate, and the memories they didn’t approve of were ripped to shreds. Into sounds and sights, odd sensations.
>They almost make sense. Garish fabric being slipped off of thick arms. Cutlery rattling on the floor, dropped in surprise. Ancient, familiar eyes twinkling in affection. A beige figure kissing his hand in greeting. His hands from before, possessively sneaking under red, green, blue velvet…
>But then, a slim hand brings his face close, and those blue eyes drags his mind deep under soothing honey waters. Bubbles tickle his skin or his head or his guts like champagne. It fills him or he fills himself, he fucks himself and comes harder. His Eighth self writhes under him, wraps around him, forces the Third’s mind with its butchered memories and trammeled knowledge to stop thinking.
>To hell with the Time Lords, to hell with the rules. Just take it, give it, let yourself explode and sink into the pleasure. Again, more, oh please don’t stop…
>It’ll be morning soon. His future self will leave. Free to explore, run, live on the edge of endless galaxies. When he leaves, the Doctor will feel as lonely and stranded as every day.
>Right now, he’s whole.
>>67819530
why does the Doctor first talk to a single person and then in the same sentence to a group of people? it's confusing. I don't even know who he's talking to. A child? a parent? I've had to reread the same sentence a few times before I got what you're trying to say here.
>Are you terrified yet?
that just sounds self-indulgent, as if you're proud of your monster-invention and want to hammer home how great it is without showing why.
>>67820017
In b4 story evolves into ten doctor orgy (War Doctor and 12 would call them degenerates and go plow Clala and Me)
>>67819937
>Irritated, the Eighth wanders around at the bazaar. One of them’s here, he can feel it, but where?
>Just across the square. Tall and magnificent, with wildly gesturing hands, legs that go on forever and too much clothing. There he is, and he’s stunning.
>Eight can’t help it; he grins and runs. He only sees his jaw drop before he crashes into his Fourth self’s arms. But now that they’re hugging, Four spins him around and laughs with him.
>As the smaller’s feet touch the ground, they’re already kissing. Eight melts in his embrace. It’s the first time the younger has made the first move on the first try! No insecurities, just passion.
>Sarah Jane screeches as the stranger collides with the Doctor. Harry yells, knocked over by their spinning.
>”Doctor, whoever that is, quit nuzzling him! I think Harry’s twisted his ankle!”
>So the actual shag has to wait a couple hours
>>67819950
Thanks for the feedback, is this any better?
>Can you name a thing most kids have that most adults have grown out of?
>I'm not sure, Doctor, can you tell me?
>No, but I'll give you a hint: personally, I haven't grown out of it yet.
>What? Are you talking about a stuffed toy or something?
>That was a good guess, but no, you're wrong. I'm talking about an imaginary friend. And you've got to listen, folks - these imaginary friends are no longer imaginary, and they thirst for blood. If you're not careful enough, or cautious enough, they'll murder you and impersonate you, fooling your child into thinking its their parents. So tell me, are you terrified yet?
>>67819937
>Ever heard proverb "for want a nail"? There's something running amok in your world and it is hungry for fixture.
Hey Paint Anon, could you please draw Punished "Venom" War Doctor?
>>67820261
It's just getting clunker holy shit
>>67820261
That notes from me kid, i know how to make some top-tier fan fiction
"Let's go somewhere we can converse in peace, shall we?"
Right, time for the proper purpose of this meeting.
The Sixth drags his clueless young Fifth self up a staircase. Almost all sound from below vanishes as they reach the corridor and enter the dim-lit little room he’s renting.
(He’s waited for himself since noon, with his own TARDIS hidden in the basement of a spa a few streets over. After an uncharacteristically timid explanation how urgent his ”errand” was, Mel doesn't mind him leaving her to relax. She even gave him a hug for luck.)
He hands himself the tea (”Blue Widower”? A cruel pun, more than anything else). Since there are no chairs, the future Doctor plops down on the edge of a bed.
The Fifth takes off his Panama hat to fan himself. Knocking back the tea, he hangs the hat on the nearest bedpost at the foot end of the bed. Finally, he places the cup on the nightstand and sits down between his hat and his future.
”So, what motivates me to drag myself to a private room in a pub?”
”It’s simple.” The Sixth puts his cuppa away. ”I’ve come to seduce you.”
The Doctor stares.
Somewhere inside, the Fifth feels how the older Fourth’s insecurities drove him to forget. The Doctor does a flawless job in awakening his younger self’s sexuality, and with that, his (once again) lost memories. It is beyond invigorating.
>>67820484
I'm trying really hard here.
>Hey Clara, can you name a thing most kids still have, but most adults have grown out of it?
>I'm not really sure, Doctor, is there any chance that you could you tell me?
>No, you should figure it out yourself - but I'm a nice guy, so I'll give you a hint: personally, I haven't grown out of the thing yet, and I'm not sure I ever will.
>Uhh, what do you mean? Are you talking about a stuffed toy or a teddy bear or something?
>That was a good guess, and it was close, but no, not exactly - you're wrong. I'm talking about an imaginary friend. And please, you've got to listen, folks - these imaginary friends are no longer imaginary, and they thirst for blood. If you're not careful enough, or cautious enough, they'll murder you and impersonate you, fooling your child into thinking its their parents, when really its a deadly monster. So tell me, are you terrified yet or no?
>>67820698
Try harder.
>>67819616
>>67820818
>Hey Clara, could you please name a thing most kids still have, however most adults have grown out of it?
>I'm not really sure, Doctor, is there any chance that you could you tell me, perhaps?
>No - don't be lazy, you should figure it out yourself - but I'm a nice guy, so I'll give you a little hint to help you along the way: personally, I haven't grown out of the thing yet, and in my opinion I'm not sure I ever will.
>Uhh, excuse me, but what do you mean? Could you be talking about a stuffed toy or a teddy bear or something?
>That was a good guess, and it was close, but no, not exactly - you're wrong. I'm talking about an imaginary friend, something I'm sure you're all familiar with - maybe you even had one yourself, or knew someone who did when you were a child. And please, you've got to listen, folks, or you might not live to see another day - these imaginary friends are no longer imaginary at all, and they thirst for blood like a Brit thirst for tea. Follow me and listen closely, because if you're not careful enough, or cautious enough, they'll murder you and impersonate you, fooling your child into thinking its their parents, when really it's a deadly monster pretending to be you. So tell me, are you terrified yet or no?
Rate my shitty fanfic dialogue, /who/
>You are extremely lucky to be alive right now. You could've died in plane crash, get hit by a train, or drown in Delhi flood last year
>But was never in Delhi. I never even thought about going to India
>Like I said. Extremely lucky.
>>67820698
>So tell me, are you terrified yet or no?
is the Doctor actively trying to make them scared?
I get that it's supposed to be a rhetoric question and that the answer is expected to be "yes", but personally I don't really feel terrified yet because all I've heard are empty words and nothing to back it up with.
In what kind of context is this scene meant to happen in the first place? the "hey clara" bit makes it sound like this was the first conversation the Doctor and Clara had that day, which makes the whole thing sound pretty random.
>Hey Clara, can you a name thing to most kids still have, although most grown people have grown out of in them?
>I'm not really so sure, Doctor, do there any chance that you could you can tell me?
>No what. You have figure it out yourself - but I'm a big guy, so to give you a hint: personally, I haven't grown out of inside the thing yet, and I'm not unsure I ever won’t.
>Uhhhhhh, why do you mean? Can you talking about the stuffed toy or inside a teddy bear and something?
>Oh my dear. You’re was a good guess, and it did close, but no, not exactly - you're wrong. You aren’t right. Clara. I’m going to tell you what riddle question answer can doing. The imaginary friend. And please, you've have to here me, folks - this imaginary friends do no longer imaginary, and sometimes thirsty for blood. If you're careful enough, or cautious enough, or scrupulous enough, or vigilant enough, or wary enough, they murder you and impersonate you, fooling the child into brainwords is their mums, when really in actually is a deadly monster.
>So tell me, are you terrified yet or no? Also check them
tldr
>What's something people around the ages of maybe 30 or 40 have stopped doing?
>I have no idea Doctor Number 12 could you maybe tell me?
>I will give you a hint because I am a nice guy like that and we are best friends I have not grown out of it yet at least I think I haven't grown up of it. Or Maybe I have and I just don't realize it yet. I'm not sure anymore.
>I have no idea what you are talking about Doctor Number 12 is it maybe a teddy bear I mean I don't think you still use one. Or maybe you do use one for all I know. I have no idea. What is it? Is it a teddy bear? Because it sounds like a teddy bear? I think it is a teddy bear? I'm right am I? It's a teddy bear yes? Yeah it is a teddy bear isn't it?
>Good guess but not exactly. It is not a teddy bear no. You were wrong it is not a teddy bear. It would be funny if it was a teddy bear. I mean you could imagine me using a teddy bear? I would never. Or maybe I have used one and I just forgot. I like to delete my memories sometimes. I can't even remember so much stuff anymore. It's crazy really if i'm honest. So no it is not a teddy bear, although like I said it would be pretty funny if it was. I was talking about an imaginary friend. You know someone who doesn't exist but you like to talk to them and pretend they do exist. I've done that sometimes. It can be pretty fun. You know? But yeah it is an imaginary friend, someone who doesn't exist but you pretend they do, like I said. And listen, folks - these imaginary friends are no longer imaginary, and they thirst for blood. If you're not careful they'll murder you and replace you as your child's new parents. Are you terrified yet?
>>67820895
>>67821390
Ayy
>>67821440
That was fucking trash m8 i told you take advice from me
>He’s still not sure about it. Long ago, his futures used to be a security sling. They left him alone for too many decades, left him in immortal frustration with no hope for even having a next life, any future at all. Until one of them, at long bloody last, made contact. There’s still so much fury, confusion and hurt, twisting his stomach whenever his next self leaves.
>But every few days, the Tenth returns. Like he’s promised. With a wink and a smile and a ”Companions asleep?” from a control screen, the Doctor lets him phase in. For hours on end, they talk over tea, drinks and pastries. The Doctor doesn’t – wait, Nine. (Nine, you’re Nine, your number matters now. That’s what Ten calls you, and he says it with such warmth…) Nine doesn’t think his current body has consumed as much sugar in it’s entire lifespan, as it has in these last weeks.
>One night, it’s almost like the cozy old times. Lazing around in a sofa, with his older self’s head in his lap, playing with his hair. Ten takes another swig of the cinnamon whiskey. He only blushes; the stuff can’t get Time Lords properly drunk. (Can’t get the lone Time Lord drunk.)
>When Ten’s head turns and lips press against his stomach, Nine lets it happen. He doesn’t even think about it. The future lifts the hem of his jumper, the kisses tickle…
>”Doctor…?”
>Sometimes he can’t bear to look into Ten’s puppy eyes. They’re darker than usual, and his lips are parted.
>The twist in his stomach loosens a little. Warmth pools in his groin. It’s not the sex that’s the issue.
>Is he still not sure about it? He can’t tell.
>”Go ahead.”
>With a cheeky smile, Ten unzips Nine’s jeans.
But how can you cope with all that ego?
Rate my fanfic
>Doctor: "Regenration?"
>General: "Tenth."
>Doctor shoots General
>General regenerates into woman
>General "The only time I've been a man, that last body. Dear lord, how do you cope with all that ego?"
>Unnamed Gallifreyan guard shoots General
>General regenerates back into white male
>General: "Thanks senpai"
>High fives all around
>>67821767
>ywn fuck jenna coleman
>farts
>>67821858
where's the tear rolling down his face
>>67820984
>Hey Clara, could you please name a thing most kids still have, however most adults have grown out of it?
>I'm not really sure, Doctor, is there any chance that you could you tell me, perhaps?
>No - don't be lazy, you should figure it out yourself - but I'm a nice guy, so I'll give you a little hint to help you along the way: personally, I haven't grown out of the thing yet, and in my opinion I'm not sure I ever will.
>Uhh, excuse me, but what do you mean? Could you be talking about a stuffed toy or a teddy bear or something?
>That was a good guess, and it was close, but no, not exactly - you're wrong. I'm talking about an imaginary friend, something I'm sure you're all familiar with - maybe you even had one yourself, or knew someone who did when you were a child. And please, you've got to listen, folks, or you might not live to see another day - these imaginary friends are no longer imaginary at all, and they thirst for blood like a Brit thirst for tea. Follow me and listen closely, because if you're not careful enough, or cautious enough, they'll murder you and impersonate you, fooling your child into thinking its their parents, when really it's a deadly monster pretending to be you. So tell me, are you terrified yet or no?
guys this is copypasta-worthy right here
>>67821858
>>67821949
No it isn't. Fuck off.
>Be with my gf
>She mentions that she likes pigtails
>I reply that they are good as blowjob handles
>She balks at how I am "objectifying her"
>I chuckle
>Mention the irony that there was an object on Who which they anthropomorphized called Handles
>She doesn't get it
>No more blowies after that
What would you do in this situation senpaitachi
>>67822256
>>She balks at how I am "objectifying her"
>>I chuckle
>>Mention the irony that there was an object on Who which they anthropomorphized called Handles
Are you autistic?
>>67821948
>>67822293
I'm posting on /who/, so yeah, all signs point to probably.
And anyway, how the fuck should I have acted? Apologetic?
>>67822256
>make autistic references to doctor who
>surprised when she doesn't like you for it
>>67821949
Fuck off you French faggot.
And so it came to pass on Christmas Day, that the cats race did cease to exist. But even then, kats had no concept of their role in greater events. For this was far more than cats's end! This was the day upon which the whole of creation would change forever! This was the day... the Trip Lords returned. For Tripliffrey! … For victory! … For the end of /who/ itself!
>>67819530
Why are you literally stealing my idea? I mean I don't really mind but you could say I already posted it before or something. Thanks I guess.
>>67822256
Eat Deep Heat and suck my nipples.
>>67822652
Is /who/ finally dying?
>>67821101
I actually could see 12 saying that.
>>67816568
>Implying there aren't inherent differences between men and women which render men vastly superior
Pic related
>>67822398
I dunno, either apologize or try to explain why it's not objectifying, but changing the subject to Doctor Who just makes it sound like you don't care about her feelings, pretty autistic m8.
Wow I see my imaginary friend dialogue became a meme.
>>67822398
Tell her to get the fuck over it, it's what pigtails are for.
-Belle
>>67821858
>tfw you realise someone fucked Jenna Coleman today
>tfw she's probably getting fucked right now while I'm shitposting on /who/
>tfw no one is fucking you
>my feet hurt in these boots
>no more
>>67822911
Speak for yourself.
Missy mentions she used to eat burgers for breakfast and reminds the Doctor he "crashed her glass ceiling" a similar way when she crashes the ship's glass ceiling with Clara (TV: The End of Time).
Clara tries to do the same respiratory bypass system trick she saw the Doctor use before (TV: The Mummy on the Orient Express).
The Doctor mentions going on another spaceship full of bad people, with Rose (TV: The End of the World).
The Doctor asks Flemming his race, assuming he's a Malmooth (TV: Utopia).
Missy tells the Doctor she doesn't need robots to conquer the world, to which Clara reacts accordingly (TV: Dark Water, TV: Death in Heaven).
>>67822877
Thanks based Cloister (Belle?), I will do just that.
>>67822928
Is that official? It's pretty cool. Would be nice if Big Finish or the books used something like that for cover artwork.
>>67822911
Who doesn't shitpost on /who/ while they're getting fucked?
MY EPIC FANFIC OF CAPALDI'S REGENERATION SPEECH!!!
>"I saved them, I saved you and I saved the day. Everyone is fine, faithful muslim companion from the religion of peace. Everyone is safe."
Beat. A silence in the TARDIS. Something's not quite right.
>"So why are you crying?"
The Doctor shoots a quick, sad smile.
>"Because there's one person I couldn't save. There always is."
Beat.
>"Me. But you know what they say. The show must go on. And it will. It will go on. You know, I had this friend once. Clara, her name was. Fuck, she was hot. You know what the first thing I said to her was? I told her I didn't like the colour of my kidneys. But it turns out they weren't so bad after all."
And after a wink into the lens, he then starts glowing and regenerates into a bonkers black woman.
>>67822835
t. virgin
>>67822998
HAHA, don't cry here when you're dumped faggot.
>>67822998
Anytime. She says anyone wearing pigtails over the age of 12 unironically or for the intended purposes of having handles is just being a cock tease and probably needs fucked thusly;pic related.
>>67823065
I would if it weren't for all the typos.
>>67823013
http://imgur.com/gallery/HEyrSHE
>these fags can't even kill neverweres
>>67822986
The Doctor tells Capt'n One Eye if he's met an actual, real captain and mentions Jack Harness as being one (TV: THE Empty Child et al).
When Missy kills Boloz, the Doctor asks her why she keeps killing Malmooths (TV: Utopia).
Missy outright says she's a better tyrant than all of the people on the spaceship and says she doesn't offshore murdering (TV: Dark Water et al).
>>67822986
Someone explain this meme to me.
>>67822695
Your idea? I posted this last thread and I've been working on it since. I'm rewriting S9 btw.
>>67823192
Some guy made fake wiki quotes for his fanfic I think?
>>67822928
>HEorSHE.png
>>67823202
No you're not cause I am rewriting it. Wanna see my Celtx bible file m8?
>>67823111
lol women always use that insult. The woman reverts to chimpout and uses muh poosy.
>>67823260
Who cares if someone else is rewriting it? It will be nice to see other peoples ideas
>>67823178
>offshore murdering
Kek nice one.
>>67823202
What? I'm rewriting S9, why are you stealing my idea?
>>67823287
But he's clearly lying since I posted it.
Cast
The Doctor - Peter Capaldi
Clara - Jenna Coleman
Missy - Michelle Gomez
Sia - Letty Butler
Flemming - Reece Shearsmith
Hoaksley - David Schofield
Muriel - Rebecca Front
Capt'n One Eye - Greg Davies
Scratch - Rowan Polonski
Mira - Elaine Tan
Telure - Paul Courtenay Hyu
Eustace - Tom Stourton
Zanza - Neet Mohan
Chanzo - Zina Badran
Rajah - Robin Soans
Brannigan - Simon Paisley Day
Jostel - Caroline Boulton
Boloz - Clem So
Harmony Interface - Nikki Wilson, Michelle Gomez [voice]
AI Interface - Kevan Brighting [voice]
>>67823331
No you didn't.
>>67823331
Funny guy, I'll post my s9 when I've finished.
>>67823375
>fan casting
>>67823461
>>67823468
Oh but I did.
>>67823202
>>67823260
>>67823322
>>67823331
>>67823461
>>67823468
What if you're all the same person posting in this thread at different times?
>>67823594
Nice shop.
>Shit-tier forced memes everywhere
>"MOM HE STOLE MY FANFIC!" is becoming disturbingly common
>Over half the posts are cats
>95% of the other posters came here from Tumblr
>/whotube/ is already dead
>>67823542
Don't worry they'd all be actually properly used in Last Party. Instead of being shamelessly wasted like Rebecca Front in The Zygon Invasion.
>>67823260
Yeah m8, I'm gonna call your bluff - I do want to see it. I'M the one known around here for rewriting S9 so fuck off.
>>67823375
Don't post this please, it's MY cast list and I'd appreciate it if you gave me credit.
>>67823652
>being this mental
>>67823594
Nice shop. I wrote this and every revision of it you've seen in this thread (besides >>67821390
and >>67821440 obviously).
This thread is shit. It's "you're the small guy in the picture!!!!" all over again. Probably the same anons too. I'm out, you're tiring.
https://mega dot nz/#F!B4IU0bAY!F74hXJxNvM_aAE6cVZgh3A
I uploaded a lot of DVD covers, all I could find in high-res, Region 2 and 4
>>67823628
>>Over half the posts are cats
>>95% of the other posters came here from Tumblr
These facts are 100% true.
I forgot how much autism festered in off season /who/
>>67823707
I'M THE PHUCKING ONE REWRITING S9 AND I'M SICK OF PEOPLE IMPERSONATING ME
THIS IS ME, FOR PHUCK'S SAKE: >>67823715
THIS PHUCKING FAKER IS NOT ME: >>67823594
>>67823775
this tbqh
>>67823775
Good riddance fun police anon.
>>67823829
Stop replying to me I don't care.
Does anyone have any pics of Osgood's thickness from Gallifrey One?
Why is /who/ being way more autistic than usual?
>>67823829
m8 stop it now.I'm rewriting s9
>>67823884
Go away this isn't allowed here, either you meme like us pretending you're the guy rewriting Series 9 or you fuck off.
I CHALLENGED THE FAKER TO REVEAL HIS PHUCKING S9 BIBLE AND HE STILL HASN'T
PHUCKING DISGRACEFUL
>>67823904
Because they're having "'"fun"". They're probably the anons who thought Series 9 was fun.
>>67823884
ohh yay lets just post pictures of actresses it's fun
>>67823904
ohh yay lets just post pictures of marthas crooked teeth it's fun
>>67823947
I'm not gonna show you the bible m8 you'd say it's yours like the retarded meme spouting dipshit you are. I'm done with you and this thread, see you :^)
>>67823966
I THOUGHT IT WAS PHUCKING SHITE
THAT'S WHY I'M REWRITING S9 AND THE FAKER ISN'T
LYING SCUM
>>67823904
/who/ is trying to cope with the fact that there will be no new episodes for at least another year or more.
>>67824002
SHOW ME THE PHUCKING BIBLE OR /WHO/ WILL SEE YOU AS THE FAKER YOU ARE FOR YEARS TO COME, PHUCKHEAD
>>67823999
>being a butthurt bully
