Sorry sir we have a no singles policy.
I already paid for my ticket
Careful sir, its hot!
Then come with me. I'll make it worth your while
Shut the fuck up you nignog
Good thing i'm here with my doubles then
B-b-b-b-b-but I'm waiting for a friend!
My date is waiting for me in the theater. We bought our tickets separately. I already passed penis inspection and checked my falcon at the aviary desk. Can I go now?
>>67761746
>Hello sir we're trying to bankrupt our business through commercial suicide
>>67761746
Who's the fuccboi on the left?
>>67761746
that's ok, i'm with my sister
>>67761746
Good thing I got dubs then
lucky ive got these dubs
>>67762408
>>67762413
were you looking for these?
Sir or madam
How do you want hour footbaths
>>67762444
No these actually thanks tho
>>67762525
singlets, when will they learn?
>>67761746
LANE?
Damn, I guess I'll have to find another movie theater to shoot up. Curse you, NSP!
>>67761746
fucking hate when this happens
>>67761746
You just know she craves that BBC.
I'm not from burgerland, is this a real thing? Why would any theater do that?Or did I just fell for the memes?
>>67762543
>singlets
>2525
step it up cuck
>>67761746
>go to the theater to see Army Dog
>bring my younger sister along, so she can pretend to be my girlfriend because of the no-singles policy
>I hand the cashier my gift card and she spins the wheel of fortune
>we end up getting wine and grilled vegetables, not bad
>the movie starts
>I like the visuals and the general atmosphere of the film
>but then, the brutal ten minute rape scene comes up, and just when this happens, the Mimichorn goes off
>men are wrestling with their girlfriends and wives, who are pretending to resist while their men tear of their pants
>me and my sister are feeling pretty awkward at this point, and people are starting to notice our violation of the theater etiquette
>"Fight me", I urge my sister, as I hurl her on the floor
>she's screaming and kicking me, giving a very good performance
>however, her feeble body is no match for my physique chiseled by tons and tons of iron and I easily overpower her
>I rip of her pants and plunge my manhood into her unbesmirched vulva
>I ejaculate like Mount Vesuvius
>finally the Mimichorn goes off again, and the couples return to their seats
>my sister is crying
>when the movie ends, we are rewarded with the trophy for the best act
>the overseer was very pleased, and he personally shakes both our hands when he gives us the trophy on the door
>the movie was 9.5/10, I'd rate it kino
>get past no singles police using my ninja moves I learned from watching Daredevil Season 2
>get into theater shower to wash off my stench so ill fit in better with the filthy clean normies
>get into packed theater for BvS(ironically ofc)
>movie begins
>expect ill make it 5 minutes before shouting "THIS IS REDDIT, THIS IS MEMES"
>instead im treated to a true piece of cinema that you could even consider capekino
>Based Snyder does it again
>half way through I realize im out of Crab Leg butter
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>get found out
>get thrown to the curb
>didn't even get to keep my remaining Crab Legs
>>67761746
No problem, here are my dubs
>>67762878
Of course she does, the BBC produces some quality programming.
>>67761746
I just booked a ticket for myself to watch BvS in a few hours, I hope they let me in.
>>67762525
>>67762543
2525 is also dubs
>>67761746
Then check these doubles
>>67763124
I would honestly rather watched BLACKED videos than BBC programming at this point tbqhwyf.
>>67763152
If that's how you cucks want to waste your time that's entirely up to you.
>>67762954
we have a theater shooting epidemic so it's either this or infringe on our God given right to carry guns anywhere and that's not gonna happen
>>67763199
Because someone going to shoot up a cinema totally wouldn't just do it in the lobby if someone says "no singles", right?
>>67763152
What's the difference anymore?
>>67761746
i-i'm meeting someone inside !
>>67761782
>>67762408
>>67762525
ya dun goofed m8
>>67761778
>it's a Louis tries to make a black hetero man fuck his asshole-episode
Man, that crazy Louis CK. All his wacky schemes crack me up. What was the wackiest scheme? I like the one where he hid inside the cash register.
>>67761770
literally a hothead
>>67762354
Lanes boyfriend, but Robert's cucking him
>tfw cinema called the cops on me because I was alone and refused to leave
>got a fine for it
>been disputing it in court for two months
