Can we have a funny female comedian thread?
I'll start with one of my favorite jokes of Amy Schumer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKlKvH3eYus
>dat shitty hair
>dat cheap make-up
>dat atrocious dress
Holy shit, doesn't she have a stylist or something?
Does the audience laugh at this because they think if they get caught on camera not laughing they'll get chastised by the media for not doing so?
>>64993769
Why do you think the men in the audience cover their faces? It's just to seem like they are laughing but they are actually crying inside
She definitely knows all about being disgusting.
Unfunny CUNT!
I'm not really into rough sex or domination
But I would love to break her
>>64993705
>DUDE MY ASSHOLE LMAO
amy schumer truly is a visionnaire
>>64993705
I wanna see her boobies
>>64993705
serious question....who did she fuck to blow up all of a sudden? I mean she has been around for fucking ever in the comedy scene and no one knew or cared about her. Now this past year she is fucking everywhere and being praised as some female comedy god. I mean article after article comes out about her show like its this brand new must see comedy, except it was the THIRD season.
>>64993705
still the best:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bv-7feBZtGQ
>>64993705
She should do a nude scene.
>>64994017
Shoes! lol
Obligatory
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HeiSx5MNDvg
>>64993846
Went to one of her stand ups. It's amazing how many people will pay her money just to say that.
Natasha Leggero is alright.
she's right though my life ambition is to put my peen inside an attractive ladies poohole
idk why, maybe so she has to live her whole life knowing every time she poops that there was once a peen up her pooper, and she's a dirty slag
>>64993976
She actually did a good bit at Charlie Sheen's Roast
>>64994017
maybe she's shite but at least she's not some fuck ugly, smug, feminazi whore
>>64993705
DUDE
ASS
LMAO
>>64994163
you are so wrong...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-w-3CplMi4
Who's the ugly Jew looking bitch that got put on blast on twitter about a caricature?
>>64993769
Must be edited from them laughing at other moments like x factor
>>64994017
shoes!
aaaaaaahh!
>>64994017
Ugh. Shut up bitch. Her voice is nails on a chalkboard. How do Brits listen to these shit accents every day
>>64994207
Chelsea Peretti
>>64994088
>this is comedy
>>64993705
DUDE
VAGINAS
BUTT HOLES
LMAO
be honest would you "fuck" her
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaoOMFs4qcQ
She's the funniest
>>64994340
no. If you start finding her attractive just jerk off and those bad ideas will go away.
>>64994340
no, her face is to small or the rest too big. looks like shit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Un-s2NbRBOY
just the best female improv'er coming through
>>64994340
only under the influence of alcohol because it makes me really horny
however i find that my orgasms' pleasure is diminished by the effects of alcohol when compared to weed or being sober, so I would instantly regret my decision post orgasm.
>>64994310
What an ugly bitch, if I remember correctly comedians are supposed to take jokes/heckling in stride and she got majorly assblasted about a fucking drawing, this is why I can't take female stand up comedians seriously
>>64994423
i find her pretty.
>>64993705
I bet she would not hesitate to stick her tongue where Orlando shits
>>64994017
Set it to 2x speed so the cringe is over faster.
>>64994427
Does she have that disease like those kids on youtube?
>>64994554
I dunno, what's your youtube account?
>>64994590
Kek that was pretty funny. Unless you're a girl of course
>>64994017
[heavy breathing]
I can't
What a homophobic routine.
>>64994423
Here's how you tell that joke:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tw10xa_xtNg
>>64994651
girls wouldn't find that funny?
>implying
>>64994427
Ho Ho, blech.
>>64994017
this is actually clever, builds up, tells a story and contains JOKES! incredible!
say this is bad all you want it's a million times better than anything else I've seen in these types of threads.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfVH2HFVsng
>>64994957
>2012
she used to look really good´
Did she got fat as a career boost, since women have to be fat to be funny?
>>64994017
There is a lesson here. I happen to be a mediocre comedian. I should cut my dick off and become a great comedian.
>>64994854
he tells it really well
>>64993765
Are you a grill or a gay?
She's ugly. None of that shit will help.
>>64994957
Good old times when I wasn't sure if she was hot or not.
Now I know ;_;
>funny female comedian
>>64995214
And knowing is half the battle.
>>64994854
Gilbert is the only good standup comedian.
>>64994017
>click through
>those dislikes
Well, seeing that was funny.
>>64994136
There are writers for Roasts. Everyone hires writers...except for The Situation
>>64995302
>>64994116
Stop trying to force this meme. She is a talentless whore who couldn't make a retard laugh if she was wearing a dress made out of pinwheels.
>>64993705
>Haha guys listen to this, you're gonna love it.
>PENIS.
>PENIS IN THE ASSHOLE
>*audience implodes on itself from laughing too hard*
Americucks
>>64994957
>those Klondike and tacobell sponsorships
There was never a question
I clicked on a link Bobcat sent out about a comedy special he directed for "his brilliant pal". His use of words is telling. If a comedy special is funny that's what you lead with. Hell, if you directed it you should say that. At least he was being half honest; they are pals...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G4QDVfqCACU
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1irAxNOHxs
On the newest one I realized that comments/ratings were disabled. Same goes for the only video posted on her personal Youtube account. I wonder why that is....
>women
>funny
>>64994017
Reminder to get used to this:
http://www.theguardian.com/media/2014/feb/08/bbc-comedy-shows-male-panels-female-presence
>>64995791
basically a mandate for shows to be less funny
yay progressives!!
>>64994423
i mean, if you don't crack a smirk at the dueling banjos thing i don't know what to tell you
>>64995791
>Danny Cohen
>>64993705
Tig Notaro - pre and post cancer great observational comedian.
Kathleen Madigan - real stand up comedian
Maria Bamford - fucking nuts and brilliant
izlia shleshinger - something is up with her, things don't add up, but I like her material. however when you put her against kathleen or maria and she's goddamn awful.
runner up to Joan Rivers because she was a great insult comic, but had no real material. She was a groundbreaker and it's important to note her existence opened up the doors for women to do stand up comedy, for better or worse.
everything else is women trying to be sarah silverman - who is mid-tier at best, but not 'funny'. she's like patton oswalt says some comedians are 'funny - but who gives a shit funny', not funny with something to say.
everything else is something something 'my vagina'
bottom tier - whitney cummings - was put on a daeus out of nowhere for roasts, then had a bunch of shows that bombed - the worst type of female comedian - fucked and sucked her way into the spotlight and pissed off a lot of people who were working hard without sucking as much dick.
>>64994957
Did she get fat after breaking up with Ziggler? Was he the key to all of this?
>>64994340
No because any offspring with her from anyone would probably look like Charles II of Spain.
>>64996729
None of them are funny, especially not Maria Bamford
Only Joan and Phyllis Filler were actually funny
>>64995165
I'm a grill desu
>>64996899
Jesus Christ
*Diller
>>64996899
kill yourself
>>64996958
Prove me wrong faget
>>64993705
I just heard first sentence and dropped
>>64994017
this is actually good though
miles better than female comedian™#3447447 who talks about dicks
>>64995647
>>64996729
'Cept Patton Oswalt is who gives a shit funny. And not even really that funny
Sarah Silverman
Natasha Leggero
Jenny Slate (not really a standup but f u desu)
this fat kike is considered funny?
now thats a good joke
Schumer blew up due to third wave feminist tumblr aids in the past few years, betting she's going to get fatter and less funny before she JUST fucks her shit up and ends up disgusting and irrelevant like Melissa McCarthy or whoever
>>64993765
i'm actually pretty sure that she doesn't have a stylist
i remember reading that somwhere, or maybe that was lorde.
>>64994340
No. Unlike most people on /tv/, I have dignity.
>Female Comedians
Isn't that an oxymoron?
>>64995553
British awards
>>64993705
Aubrey Plaza can be pretty funny sometimes
>>64993705
Jesus, does she ever do comedy that isn't crude or subversive in some way?
Guys, post videos.
No one's gonna google those names you keep writing. Give us something to watch.
>>64993765
shut the fuck up you blazing faggit.
>>64998331
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CkgEt6SHyfc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYqcql8wSh0
>>64997519
silverman is cancerous dogshit, leggero is just dogshit
if slate is anything like the ones mentioned before, I've got news for you!
make it through the whole video, I dare you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4VGPgmxc94
>>64993769
Yes.
Remember when Girls went from incessant critical acclaim to quietly being ignored after Dunham turned out to be a child abuser?
Schumer will do something else and lose out on FOTM "comedy genius" status. They will find another woman genius. She will do something else stupid.
Hollywood is even more concerned with blindly following the common opinion because you never know where your next meal will come from. If you say the wrong thing, not only could people close to that person or project leave you behind, but other followers could dogpile you in order to signal their worthiness to the persons involved.
>>64995647
No matter where she is or what she is doing, this comedian will ONLY talk about being a lesbian. She will find any and every opportunity to mention she has a mullet and is attracted to women.
>>64993769
They think its funny. I know its hard to believe after spending so much time on 4chan but the truth is most of the planet loves what people here hate and swear is garbage no one likes.
>>64997519
this dumb bitch got fired from SNL for saying fuck on live television
how stupid do you have to be that you cant even modify your own vocabulary when necessary
>>64998927
I found this to be true
tried interacting with a normie - having an accommodating personality myself, it works up until like for media, humor and such comes up, then there's complete disconnect
tried watching a movie together...
>>64998527
wow, that's bad
>franco's fake grin
>>64999047
he's just on drugs, doesn't know what the fuck is going on
>>64993705
This one is my very favorite Amy jokes, I KEK everytime. She truly is a master of her own craft
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRe2Rs7LomY
>>64993705
maria bamford is one of my favorite no matter the gender https://youtu.be/OZoDIIrp2r4
I would fuck her. I'd destroy her, that's how hungry for the puss I've become.
>>65000701
jesus, you're bringing out the top shit and even she is not funny
>>64993753
Harrison confirmed for doing anal
>>65000701
>le funny noises and voice
Maybe I don't get it... what if I'm in the wrong?
>>64993769
Sometimes people laugh in times of awkward situations because they don't know how else to react. This seems to be the case.
>>64994340
Ofcourse, in a heartbeat.
>>65000962
you are not, it's bottom shit
This was actually pretty funny
>>65001103
I can assure you, it was not
>>64994340
No.
Amy is the type of girl that would have sex with just about anyone because she's fat and not that attractive, and you'd have sex with her because you're desperate to have sex.
Afterwards, you'd wake up regretting the decision and she'd never let you forget it and incorporate you into her "jokes".
>>65001135
I enjoyed it
Everything Tina Fey wrote is hilarious
>>64994427
She has such a great voice. I could listen to her talk for hours.
>>65001183
I wouldn't go about telling people that
I think women can be funny, but I have yet to see a stand up comedian who is female that I found funny.
>>64993705
LIKE OMG VAGINAS LMAO
>>65001278
But I just did
>>65001294
there is not a single funny female on earth
irl face to face, the cuck area of our brain may deceive men to think a woman is being funny or clever and make us laugh along with whatever dumb shit they said, but put it down in writing, watch it on a screen, and it falls flat like every joke a woman ever made
>>65000962
listen to her in here
http://www.feralaudio.com/maria-bamford-hampton-yount-drennon-davis-rye-silverman-courtney-karwal-and-host-brent-sullivan/
she is like 11 minutes in, or "- 1:06:00" according to their timer
her voices are interesting : the way she sketch characters/archetypes 's psychology by the way they express themselves. and the way she uses them, they pop up all the time ; it's like there's a crowd in there . the way she structures her bit is interesting too , there something strange or experimental about it.
but hey it's humor , right, everybody is an expert: the only thing you need to do is to say "not funny" and BAM case closed it was all decided...
>>65001103
She wasn't very good on Big Fat Quiz.
>>64997519
>Jenny Slate
>funny
She's pure kike pc cancer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A848xpsDJbw
>>65001494
wow, what a load of wank
>>65001606
yayaya stfu fucking wastrel or bring something to the table
>>65001703
I just did, you posted a load of wank - bamford is shit, there is not changing that
and now I know she can't and doesn't like cooking, either, so she's worthless and a failure as a female
>>65001772
cuckservative humor huh, well now i know why you have no taste or discernment .
>>64998554
What the actual fuck. Did they seriously put a literal retard do stand up comedy or is it an "act"?
Bro women fart just like men do haha!
>>64998739
>her singing videos have 42 million views
jdimsa
>>64993705
>be a fat ugly bitch
>call men disgusting
>"I'm single"
There is a reason for that, Amy. Now stop shilling on /tv/ and go work on actual funny material.
>ANAL JOKES!
>I'M FUNNY I SWEAR
just kill yourself bitch
that would be hilarious
It's always sunny did a perfect episode about female comedians
>>65003429
I was just about to post that. Dee finally gets successful doing standup doing "vagina, vagina" jokes and it's terrible.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kJSryaPHaNM
>>64994116
She was really really really lame in Superstore.
>>65003512
Is that a satire of female comedy or her real act?
Please I feel sad not knowing.
>>65003775
You should really watch the episode (The Gang Broke Dee), but it's satire.
I mean, in the show it's her real act. But the show is satire.
>>64994017
>>65001536
Who cares if she's Jew shes adorable and funny when not involved in some sort of Norm Mcdonald red carpet nonsense you tried to show me...
>>64993705
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8S692f1tnuQ
>She even at one point echoes what I think is my strongest point, namely that women don't need to be funny.
>That for most men if they can't make women laugh they are out of the evolutionary contest, they are never going to get laid.
>Most men are fantastically unattractive, what women see in them is mysterious to most men as well as most women.
>If you can't make them laugh you don't have a chance.
>With women, there's no need to be rendering yourself attractive to men in that way.
>We already find you attractive, thanks
I actually really liked 30 Rock and Tina Fey in that.
She sucks in her movies though, but thanks to 30 Rock I'll always like Tina.
>>64993705
>like...like...like...like...like...like...
How are people supposed to take her seriously as a native english speaker, much less a comedian?
Oh god, amy schumer is absolute cancer.
>>64998554
Man I got to meet her once and she's so nice in person. She dubbed herself a funny person, when I said yeah you're a good comedian she corrected me, no I'm just a bit funny
Mm funny comediennes. I like when they are funny AND smart :^).
>>65004684
As if that fat cow could even play tennis
>>65004684
Why dismantle the seat of the most charitable organization in the world? And what about the tourism income?
>>64998554
How the fuck does the audience understand what she's saying?
>>65004684
>Sell the Vatican
To who? Who has 500 billion dollars just lying around? Bill Gates? Why not just ask him to donate the 500 billion dollars to feed everyone or whatever? Fuck this triggered me
>>64998739
this cunt is getting a netflix show, have netflix's standards for original programming sunken so fucking low
>>64993705
when will women finally give up on trying to be funny
>>65004024
#truth
>>65004796
it's a joke
the point of the joke is to show the disproportionate expenses of the church compared to their charitable outlook
whether or not the vatican can actually be sold is besides the point when the point is the value of the vatican in the first place
i shouldn't have to be explaining such a simple joke on 4chan but i am
>>65004927
Except its a shit joke because the Vatican isn't worth $500 billion because they make a truckload of money every year, its because they're in possession of a staggering amount of historical artifacts that have value even outside of their religious context.
Bonus points that the one complaining about religious charity is a fucking Jew.
>>64994340
not after that comedy act no
>>64998554
Yeah I mean nah
>>65004684
>jew telling christians to tell their holy city.
Why not just sell israel to the palestines for the same amount? :^)
>>64999231
>that moment where he stops smiling and you can just tell he's deciding whether or not to decapitate the bitch with his bare hands.
>>65003512
>dude vagina
>>65001103
Its terrible and I'm pretty sure the show is set up because i don't know how someone so bad a comedy could actually pull solo shows.
>>64997519
>Jenny Slate
agree she's a qt
>>64993705
>Chocolate? I eat that
>Feminist? I am that.
>Clitoris? Men can't find that.
>Caucasian Christian males? I'm against that.
>>64993846
Tim! Tim! Tim! W-w-w-well
>>65006668
>scroll down 2 posts
>video is right there
goddammit why can't i delete shit instantly
When will this Vapid Troglodyte go away?
>>64993705
I don't care what anyone says she's hot as fuck. She's not really funny or likable but holy shit she's a fucking 9.5/10
>>64993705
The problem with female stand-ups is that they always have to prove something. When you prove something, you present yourself as the hero. The trick to funny stand-up is to present yourself as a loser.
But women in real life can be very funny. It's usually in a more gentle way. When a group of women talk among each other, there is a genuine sense of humour there, that is different to the male sense of humour. It's hard to capture in stand-up.
