>British documentary
>Here, in the jungles of Bhata-Tuthu, the praying mantis is in search of its prey.
>3 minutes of very clean and uninterrupted footage of the praying mantis following a spider
>American documentary
>Guitar riffs playing in the backround
>YOU PROBABLY WOULDNT WANT ONE OF THESE KILLERS IN YOUR BACK YARD
>Rapid jump cuts of the praying mantis
>THE PRAYING MANTIS MIGHT LOOK LIKE A BUG IN CHURCH, BUT THIS NASTY MOTHER-SUCKER IS NOT TO BE MESSED WITH
>More flashy jump cuts
>THIS LITTLE SPIDER DOESNT KNOW WHATS WAITING FOR HIM, THE FURY OF THE MANTIS IS NOT TO BE UNDERESTIMATED
>More flashy jump cuts
>The mantis strikes
>Strange animal growling and screeching noises are dubbed in as it attacks because silent footage is too boring for americans
>Slow mo replay of the attack in black and white
>AND ITS OVER IN A FLASH
>THAT LITTLE SPIDER
>SHOULD'VE PRAYED
>TO THE MANTIS
>Starwipe to next clip
Hey
Gets me every time.
Quick someone post the NASCAR centepide
Best meme of 2016 so far
>*freeze frame*
>Yikes, so you're probably wondering how I got here right?
>>64698071
It was first done in MMXX-V new friend
>tfw although I was in that very thread I still laff every time
>>64698083
>good maymay at first
>gets overused
>fuck it i's dead
I'm ashamed, but I'm kekking right now.
>>64697395
As an insect enthusiast, it is infuriating.
Just look at this shit.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8L_1teHLycw
>NASTY MOTHER-SUCKER
>>64698156
holy shit that's hilarious
what will claps do next?
>>64698156
I can't stop laughing
Why the fuck are there horse sounds as the ant lion starts to attack
I heard that james earl jones does most of the US versions of things attenborough does for the UK.
is this true? are they good?
>>64698109
202-5 ?
MMXV
>>64698255
>>64698283
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A990yyf-o6c
>>64698285
Did Oprah do one and Sigourney Weaver do another?
>>64698311
>MMXX - V
>2020 - 5
thanks for letting everyone know how retarded you are
>>64698355
>he cant do math
>>64698383
>do math
we already know you're a retard dude but go on
>>64698324
>Even the camera zoom needs a special effect
What the fuck
Why does everything have to be so overproduced for the audience
>>64697395
>>64697395
You forgot the part where murican Host tries to either eat or purposely infects himself with the spider's venom and asks his crew to piss on the sting while said host drinks his own urine.
Bon Jovi of course plays in the background. NOW OR NEVER!@!!!!
>americans
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3UpSlpvb1is
![anaconda-eaten-alive-1[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/7gF8ilA.jpg "anaconda-eaten-alive-1[1].jpg")
>European documentary
>Today we find ourselves deep in the jungles of South America. We are looking for the green anaconda known as "Chumana", thought to be the strongest and most lethal snake in existence.
>1½ hours of nothing but nature sounds as the camera slowly moves around the jungle
>it takes an hour into the film before they even find the anaconda
>American documentary
>pic related
>"I want to be eaten by a snake."
>>64698710
>documentaries are suppsoed to be action films !!!!!1
americans
>>64698710
>"I want to be eaten by a snake."
Did the guy have a vore fetish?
>>64698156
really now, this must be some sort of satire
what ADD kid actually watches this shit
>>64698156
>documentary on ants
>music blaring
>sounds effects of some animal mixed in over an ant
>keeps cutting to the shitty cg ant animation
>>64698710
advertise for 2 months
>our guy was "EATEN ALIVE BY A HUMAN EATING SNAKE OMG DORITOS"
what really happened
snake bites the demolition squad helmet
-omg halp halp halp
blunder of the fukken century that was
The USA may make better drama right now, but when it comes to documentaries (and not just nature ones) the UK has got you beat.
This is a random selection of the history docs on the BBC iPlayer at the moment.
Fuck, I want to watch all of these.
>>64699241
too bad drama is shit
>>64699241
BBC Four always has a lot of excellent documentaries. I especially like that one about Spain.
>>64699241
Don't watch Victorian Bakers, trash-tier
>>64697395
That's cause the entire point of american TV is to trick as many people into watching it so they sit through the commercials, while british people can make proper shows since they get free money from their commie TV tax. It is called commercialization and yes it literally ruins everything. Movies, video games, books, and other forms of art have been ruined by it. Sports have been ruined by it. When your goal is to make as much money as possible and not to make a product you are happy with, it is going to turn to shit.
>>64699318
Well apart from that. I think that falls under the food criteria rather than the history one.
Anyone else watch Portillo's Train Journeys? Comfiest fucking program ever.
>>64699335
/thread
>>64698156
>the ant going literally REEEEEE as it is being pulled under the sand
>>64699335
>tfw no Korgoth TV show because that fag had to do more Sponebob
>which in turn became undiluted horseshit
>>64698156
Fucking lol.
Just imagine all the sound effects and editing if this was an american production
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5YaihAtnC4
Aren't the PBS Empires Series American?
>Even BBC uses music now
But it's beautiful when they do it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSwvH6YhqIM
>>64699573
That's good but then
>spiders
I can't fucking do it man
British versions of things are insufferably boring. Couldn't even sit through there Dragon's Den. Gordon Ramsay's shows sucked. Everything is fucking depressing and boring as shit over there. Holy fuck.
>>64699637
I bet you're an NFL fan.
>>64699507
this might give a clue
http://youtubedoubler.com/?video1=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DX5YaihAtnC4&start1=&video2=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DE-Sg_zJrDxc&start2=&authorName=americanants
sorry for long link
>>64697395
I like this pasta
>>64699630
Have some Cheetah.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0mgnf6t9VEc
>>64699692
It generates a short link for you dingus
http://youtubedoubler.com/hjN5
>>64699739
>dat cinematografié
kino-tier
>>64697395
Needs more X-ray CGI and cuts to experts talking about nothing.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wGbCNDw-m0
>>64699739
This >>64699781
Truly magnifiqué.
Reminds me of that lone penguin strutting towards a higher purpose in the mountains.
>>64699361
#SADMANONATRAIN
>>64699241
The one on the Tsars right now is good.
>>64699301
The Spain one last year was fantastic as well.
>>64699241
>great british railway journeys
>watching award-winning Earth documentaries with David Attenborough™
>it's a dolphin scene
>fast happy music starts playing
>it's an elephant scene
>slow tuba starts playing
>it's a spider scene
>screeching violins start playing
>postproduction added animal sounds playing all throughout
much culture I am impress
>>64699264
>British drama is shit
>southcliffe
>happy valley
>shadow line
>the honourable woman
>the missing
>utopia
>queer as folk
>red riding trilogy
>this is england 86/88/90
>black mirror
>boy A
>the fall
>lewis
>cracker
>inside men
all of the top of my head, these range from imo the best tv series to really good and are all recent. i don't know where the 'british comedy is good. british drama is shit' mindset came from but it triggers my autism, esp when half the people who say it probs havenn't even seen any british drama other than dr who and sherlock (which are shit)
>>64699937
pepe is such a cutie
>>64700102
He's dead, normies got him now. It was a good run though.
>>64700066
What do you think of the War & Peace drama?
>>64699507
>the darker ants raid and pillage the lighter ants nest
>even the lighter ants women are dragged to the darker ants colony to either be enriched or devoured
even nature knows pottery
>>64699241
>Majesty and Mortar: Britain's Great Palaces
>Castles: Britain's Fortified History
These any good?
>>64699637
Go back to NASCAR rallies
>>64698156
Why the fuck did they dub a goat for the black ant, what the fuck.
>>64699241
The Immortal Egypt show was really interesting, the woman presenting it was really endearing too.
>>64699820
Why the fuck did this dumb cunt even climb the fucking fence that's right there to keep them safe from death by bear? What did she think was going to happen?
>but at least she's alive
>please god do whatever you want just please take me away from this bear
They're even pretending its not her fault, what the hell is wrong with these people?
>>64700253
The castles one has been on before and yes, its great.
Edward I, best king.
>>64700218
i haven't started it yet. is it good?
>>64698156
what the hell
these sound effects are fucking hilarious, my sides
Salaam my British brother
>>64698156
dude
ants
>>64697395
>BBC documentary about dogs
>doesn't even air because it will offend muslims
>>64698156
>yfw the memes are true
>YOU BETTER BE CAREFUL AROUND THIS GUY, BECAUSE YOU DON'T EAT HIM... HE EATS YOU!
>>64699690
Why would that matter if he was?
>>64698156
>These fucking noises dubbed in
>This fucking dramatic music
>The fucking talking head woman explaining what's going on
>The fucking goat noises
>>64699820
>its another stupid aussie tests nature and loses again episode
I'll translate the OP message for any brits out there
>وثائقي بريطاني
>هنا، في أدغال الهند، وفرس النبي هو بحثا عن فريسته.
> دقائق من لقطات نظيفة جدا ودون انقطاع للفرس النبي التالية العنكبوت
الفيلم الوثائقي الأمريكي
> ريففس العزف على الجيتار في خلف الصورة
> ربما كنت لم يرد احد من هؤلاء القتلة في الفناء الخلفي الخاص بك
> تخفيضات القفزة السريعة للفرس النبي
> فرس النبي لها قد تبدو خطأ في الكنيسة، ولكن هذا الإجمالي الأم مصاصة لا يجب أن يكون عبثوا
> تخفيضات القفزة أكثر مبهرج
> هذا لا علة صغيرة يعرف ماذا يكون في انتظاره، غضب السرعوف هو عدم الاستهانة
> تخفيضات القفزة أكثر مبهرج
> الضربات السرعوف
> الهدر حيوان غريب وضجيج الصراخ ويطلق عليها اسم في أنها تهاجم لقطات صامتة مملة جدا بالنسبة للأميركيين
> البطيئة إعادة مو من الهجوم الذي وقع في الأبيض والأسود
> كل شيء على
> الشوائب الصغيرة التي
> ينبغي لقد صليت
> للملك
> مسح لمقطع المقبل
>>64699573
If that was a US documentary the music would be DragonForce and the spider would be making noises like a fucking mountain lion.
>>64698156
>insect enthusiast
>i think ill watch "monster bug wars"
>surely this will be an intelligent documentary for an insect enthusiast such as myself
kill yourself
>>64702270
Unfunny tryhard
>>64702270
absolute bell end right here lads
>>64702300
i laffed.
i forgot mudsli- i mean brits didn't have a sense of humour
>>64702270
>wait I've got a funny joke that will make the brits really butthurt
>what is it?
>I'm going to write out some text and convert it to Arabic
>why?
>it'll be really funny, I promise
>>64702375
I invite you to translate it. But you should already understand it if you live in Europe.
>>64697395
you forgot the ad breaks every 5 mins followed by a recap of everything that has happened so far, so you end up watching the same thing 5 times
>>64702417
I really don't care enough. I'm sure its a HILARIOUS JOKE that will make it to the front page of /r/4chan.
>>64702357
I forgot American humor is so basic that you find stale shit like that hilarious
>>64702300
>>64702336
>>64702375
oh man, we knew you were all pansies after you let 3rd world countries take over you land, but now you're so pathetic you can't even handle the bantz without crying.
>>64702300
>>64702336
>>64702375
whats the matter r/greatbritain, can't handle the bantz?
>>64702483
>>64702502
I enjoy epic bare bantz when they're funny.
>>64702483
>>64702502
Its just not that funny. Honestly its that simple, I don't know why you're so obsessed with Muslims.
>>64702483
where are his ears
>thread starts out making fun of americans with a shitty overused meme
>americans retaliate with a shitty overused meme
>brits cant handle it and cry
>>>/trash/
>>64698324
>"IT FEARS NOONE"
>>64698324
>[scary lionelephant noises]
>>64702483
But why do Amerifats make fun of Britbongs about immigrants if US is also full of 3rd worlders shitting on their country?
>>64702776
Insecurity.
>>64698324
>opens with a scorpion roaring
>>64699335
This. I'm generally pro-capitalism, but God damn it is cancer on art and entertainment
>>64702937
lol at this new old smiley face meme
>>64702952
And music, and /mu/ cucks fall for it every time.
>>64698324
[dramatic music]
>>64698156
>memes are real
just fucking kill me
>>64702776
Our country is the size of your continent. Our states are the size of your countries. 3rd worlders are invading specific states, not all of america. Americans make fun of those specific states all the time
Making sweeping generalizations about america is like saying the UK is the same as slavshit countries
>>64703060
it was real before that greentext showed up dumbass, what do you think the basis of the joke was?
>>64699241
>Great british railways journeys
Worst show I've ever seen
>Today I'm visiting the wonderful town of Borington
>Here is Mr Dull, who's great grandfather made this bench, the most famous landmark of Borington
>"So Mr Dull, your grandfather made this bench?"
>"Yes"
>"Aha, yes, fascinating! Next I'm going to Snoresbury where I'll see their famous pile of rocks.
>>64699241
>BBC Radio 4 docs
>>64699820
>she dindu nuffin
>>64700733
WHY THE FUCK DOES SHE INSIST ON ALWAYS WEARING BLACK IN EGYPT THOUGH
Ive watched 3 of her previous series and she never takes the black off. She always has an umbrella because her pasty skin will cook.
>>64699820
Let me guess, Binky was put down because this bitch was stupid?
>>64698621
>Survival/Reality TV show for entertainment
Try again
Planet Earth episode about CAVES is the most GOAT episode of any documentary.
Closely followed by the BBC Horizon epsiode about the concept of Inifinity
>>64703277
You realize that black is the best color to wear in the desert, right?
>>64698156
kek that has pretty much everything from the OP
>>64703277
Black is the best colour for hot climates
>>64703350
>>64703376
Are you insane, why the fuck do you think houses in hot countries are painted white, to reflect the heat
>>64703416
>this guy
You're mom was painted white last night.
>>64702776
Because at least the Mexicans have a good work ethic and don't stone women for being raped, enjoy coming home to your wife and her new husband Hakeem.
>>64703286
Nah. In the 80's people were actually held accountable for their actions. He died from some parasitic infection.
>>64698156
>there are DEATH traps EVERYWHERE
>monster sounds
>>64703346
I agree, except for the mountain of shit part
>>64703145
>"Aha, yes, fascinating! Next I'm going to Snoresbury where I'll see their famous pile of rocks.
literally made me lol
>>64698156
What the fuck are these sounds
>European documentary
>"Today we're out here in the wilderness looking for one of the most exciting animals in existence"
>Scene cuts to seagulls and pigeons flying around
>"The small ruby-throated hummingbird. It's extremely rare and can only be found in the deepest parts of the amazonian rainforest."
>Scene switch to a birdeye view of a rainforest
>"These birds only move at night so we sent out our expert to set up a night-vision camera and a trap that should lure one of these uncommon birds."
>15 minutes of expert dialogue setting up
>cut to night-vision camera
>green dots move on a black background for 15seconds
>"And there it is! What a majestic individual! Truly a brilliant sight! People of Britain can breathe out a sigh of relief, what a great use of taxpayer money"
>victorious music starts playing
>Cut to the crew feasting on champagne and other local delicacies served by local people
>roll credits
Anyone have the QI one?
>>64704239
lame
>>64703167
>some BBC Radio 4 dramas
[ear-semen-leakage.jpg]
>>64702284
nah, definitely some screamo roar shit as it pumps web out its arsehole
>>64703145
>>64699241
>UK only
fuck
>>64700066
>utopia
i miss it so much.
>>64697395
monkeys are fucking dumb
>>64703346
>anthropomorphizing animals
>>64697395
You must add GOAT NOISES to that pasta.
>>64698156
> Hey, John Williams! Haven't done much since Star Wars, huh?
> yea, it's been tough.
> Say... i have a crazy idea. Do you like bugz?
> go on...
>>64697395
i was waiting for the mother to slam the little nigger to death
>>64705708
monkeys are literally more civilized than most negroes.
>>64705642
>that music
>John Williams
More like Giacchino or Zimmer
>Windows 10.webm
>>64705099
If you said apes are dumb you'd be right, cause you're an ape and you're fucking dumb
>>64702270
>being this mad
lol
>>64699241
Shit m8te, almost forgot about that Russian one.
Thanks for reminding me
>>64702300
>>64702300
>>64702375
>>64707160
Hope this is samefagging.
Britbongs usually aren't this transparently pathetic.
>>64698462
Because for-profit entertainment has to appeal to the largest demographic.
Stupid people are the largest demographic.
>>64702270
Nothing wrong with all the Muslims moving here senpai.
I can read some arabic, and My wife's son is fluent in Arabic.
>>64708262
>I can read some arabic, and My wife's son is fluent in Arabic.
topkek
favorite meme of '16 so far
>>64708372
hello reddit
you disgust me you fucking normie
>>64708443
>normie
I don't get how this is an insult.
>>64708490
It's basically newspeak for 'off-topic poster'.
>>64699022
Probably.
>>64699335
All you need is a license.
>>64698710
>American documentary
>"I wanna get eaten by a snake"
>After two hours of build-up snake nibbles helmet
>OMG THAT WAS SO CLOSE HAHA
>>64699335
BBC 1, 2, 3, 4 and the other ones are the only channels with no adverts. The rest have adverts and even tyhen there's barely any compared to yours.
If there's an American programme on ITV, Channel 4 or whatever they still have to get rid of some of the advert breaks.
How do you yanks even cope with it?
>>64703145
As a Brit I kek'd, that's basically all it is but it's comfy and you learn a little bit.
Prefer Continental Railway journeys myself.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nhXcef91Os
Miss Dick and Dom in Da Bungalow so much desu.
>>64709855
>Dick and Dom in Da Bungalow
Absolute shit-tier. SM:TV Live is where it's at
>>64709933
>not Up on the Roof
>>64697395
I like the version with the shitty cgi better but i have to say i laugh at these threads every time.
>>64699840
Choo! Chooooo!
>>64697395
>David Attenborough observes Americans.webm
>American documentary
>bunch of rednecks driving trucks around the countryside
>>64708262
>I can read some arabic, and My wife's son is fluent in Arabic.
I see what u did thar.
>>64702480
>humor
Fuck off yank
>>64698156
Those fucking sounds
>>64698156
Holy zozzle
>>64698156
Now compare it to this.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wKu13wmHog
>>64697395
fug this is true
>>64699241
>Big
>Black
>Cock
You cannot fabricate such a tale my family.
>>64698156
>Americlaps grow up thinking insects make goat sounds
>>64710482
>or maybe not
My sides
>>64697395
You forgot the "experts" commenting as if they are watch an MMA fight
baka senpai
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pg21D4mhQ48
>>64710482
Boring.
>>64698156
This is much more fun
>>64697395
BBC is tax funded, they can do whatever
America documentaries have tl make what sells and gets viewers
When was the last time you guys unironically watched those slower nature documentaries for extended hours?
Meanwhile normies will sit in front of the telly all day.
They worked or studied a whole lot, they just want something distracting and stimulating
>>64710482
>Or maybe not
Based Attenborough
>>64710753
>they can do whatever
They have fuck all money these days somehow and are losing things left right and centre.
>>64698156
Oh god, its exactly as OP described. He wasn't even shitposting or exaggerating, its completely accurate.
>>64699507
damn, that was interesting.
>>64703144
>>64703060
>>64698255
>>64699156
>>64702045
>>64703352
>retarded brit-bongs circle-jerking
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCG1I-Ssgww
>oh no! my precious intellectual british narrative is being disturbed!
>>64697395
>hiring kenyan construction professionals to build a set for the nature documentary.webm
>>64710482
that spider is cool af looking 2bh
>>64698156
>OP wasn't shitposting
God damn.
>>64712141
thats not buffalos thats bisons
>america claps
>being in charge of making a nature documentary
>>64712141
While far from being as bad as the bug wars clip, that's still more dramatised than the bbc clip.
>>64698156
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lAupJzH31tc
BBC documentaries add ridiculous sound effects too spice up their time lapse footage
>>64712403
>that's a bison
BRIT BONG EDUCATION EVERYONE!
>The American bison (Bison bison), also commonly known as the American buffalo
>>64712434
Not really. They played music over footage just like PBS did.
>>64710482
>circus music
>dubbed in sound effects
oh wow so much better
>>64712434
Dramatisation isn't bad. The way the Americans do it is.
>>64712705
And what way is that, Brit-bongistani? Identical to the way everyone else does it? Oh, right, because you're hypocrites, I forgot.
>>64712593
the majority of the world misspronounce the highest mountain, Mt everest as EVER REST, when its actually pronunced EVE REST.
Just because 300 million retards calling a cake for a book, it doesnt mean they are right
>>64712746
Yeah, good luck finding anything consistently as over the top as that anywhere else
>>64712799
http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/everest
>>64712799
you're one of those people huh
>>64710482
>that ending
Based britain.
its the same with their sports.
with yuro football i can sit back and enjoy 45 min of uninterrupted game.
i once tryed to follow an NBA match... holy fuck that shit is exhausting with all the commercials and twitter quotes and ingame advertising, fuck that shit.
>>64710482
>tfw I got attached to the poor baby mantis
The world is a cold, cruel place
>>64699156
can i just watch a nature documentary without the soundtrack to Gladiator playing in the background?
>>64712434
You're wrong if you don't think The Hunt was just as if not more dramatized, or if there's anything wrong with dramatizing these docs a bit
>>64699637
the british version of kitchen nightmares is the best reality show i've seen
>no pageantry
>no flash editing
just cursing and helping assholes make decent food and not run their restaurant into the ground
>>64712403
shut up you don't even have those in bongistan
also "Those are bison." not "thats"
learn to queen's english
>>64713793
>>64713793
still faker than shit though
"reality" TV is garbage
>>64699739
>00:58
I bet they told the bear to stand on the edge of that ice flake. Cheating brits
>>64713906
oh please enlighten us with your wisdom oh anon!
tell us how the world really is!
>>64714478
calm your tits faget, I'm just saying less fake editing and fake acting doesn't make the premise any less fake
>>64698156
That's the most american thing since the latest school shooting
>>64698156
THE FUCKING LATIN CHANTING HOLY SHIT
>>64698083
Jesus christ I'm dying.
>>64698156
I remember this show when it first aired.
They would have five minute commercial breaks between each """"""""""fight""""""""""
it lasted like three weeks.
>>64698156
Holy shit, no exaggeration whatsoever.
>>64698156
Classicmeme thread
>>64699156
>World War II in Colour just added to Netflix
>All this Ken Burns shit just added to Netflix
P based t b h lads
What's the point of making a nature documentary if you're not going to actually show nature?
>>64698083
holy kek
