It's always darkest until the dawn, but a flashlight doesn't give a damn about the time.
They say you can take the cowboy out of the West, but you can't take the West out of the cowboy. Well guess what? I'm looking East right now and all I see is a bunch of Indians staring back at me.
>>64662861
You ever heard the old saying "Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free?"
Well, I sold the cow, Ray, and nothing is free anymore.
This isn't one of those out of the frying pan and into the fire situations Ray, our goose has been cooked in the fire this whole time while we were grabbing mimosas from the fridge, thinking our ducks were all in a row locked up in the freezer. It just took a ruined Thanksgiving fucking dinner for us to realize our smoke alarm batteries ain't fucking working.
>>64662861
My mother always told me to not piss on her leg and tell her it's raining, well the piss turned into shit and we're up to our knees.
They say you don't know a man until you walked a mile in his shoes. I'm only halfway to being the man I used to be and I'm already neck deep in shit. And I don't remember being a sewage worker, Ray
They say the house always wins, but guess what Ray? I never even got dealt my fucking cards.
They say you can't judge a book by it's cover. Well Ray, I got a book and all the fuckin pages are ripped out
I have never seen season 2 but is vinceposting worth watching it?
It's a dog eat dog world out there, we'll guess what Ray I'm the god damn China man.
They say don't count your chickens before they hatch, but all my eggs are in one basket and it's breakfast time, Ray.
>>64663355
Damn, good one.
>>64663326
Not really.
post the hands one
They say you can judge man by looking at his hands. Well I've been staring at mine for 40 years and you know what I realized Ray? They're fucking feet
They say "history is written by the victors". But i don't care about the past, I'm trying to write the future, Ray.
Ever been to a baby shower, Ray? I remember my first. I was walking around asking everyone "Where's the baby? Where's the baby?" They all looked at me like I was nuts. But you know what I finally realized, Ray? The baby was me, and I've still got a lot of growing up to do.
Did ray eve appreciate all the fucking knowledge he was receiving?
>>64663326
Not at all. He doesn't say shit like this that much, and when it does it's not funny, it's just cringeworthy.
The reason it's a meme is because it's so cringeworthy you can make it funny.
>>64663326
something something something patrician
>>64662861
They say to take everything you hear with a grain of salt, but all i've got is oregano and i'm not exactly eating pizza here, Ray
> Casper knew this
My father once told me a story about how during the height of the Cold War, the space race, the Americans had invested millions of dollars into developing a pen that could write in space. The Russians? They used a fucking pencil.
That's me, Ray. I'm the fucking pencil. Casper's killers knew this, and now they're trying to erase everything i've built.
>>64664319
haha holy shit
>>64663562
best one so far
>>64662861
KGB MOTHER FUCKER
>>64663326
nope. when vinceposting started off it was much harder and it was just a "ITT we come up with stuff that this guy might say" so everybody was using big pretentious words and turns of phrase and idioms that made no fucking sense while trying to sound deep. it was only after a while that a formula emerged for it.
original vinceposting was like
>stop this egregious rambunctiousness Ray or so help me I will get apoplectic, capiche?
now it's like
>they say that [popular phrase] Ray, well [bizarre nonsensical inversion]
>>64663562
They say it's a doggy dog world Ray, well I'm gonna eat this dog.
>>64666261
even some autist came up with a formula
During the California Gold Rush a lot of prospectors out west would find the bones of human hands deep within the earth Ray, deeper than any man had a right to dig. Do you know who those hands belonged to, Ray? Shoshone larcenists, these days I wonder if my own hands belong in that desert muck along with Casper's killers. The bones spell out a message ray, from the natives to us. They spell out 'asshole' and only God knows who's it for.
>>64663566
no he was too busy drinking and being depressed
>>64664319
I bet you Pizza would probably write this shit and think it was good.
>>64666799
This was the only good thing about TD2:electric boogaloo
It saddens me
>>64664319
This is absurdly good PizzaPosting.
They say there's more things in Heaven and Earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy Horatio, Ray. Well I don't have much time for philosophy, Ray. Never was one for autodidactism myself. There ain't time when you're crawling up outta the gutter, trying to make ends meet on the streets. I ain't exactly thinking about Schopenhauer's Parerga and Paralipomena when I'm kickin' some rat fuck's teeth in; and I don't exactly know who the fuck Horatio is supposed to be exactly but I do know one thing that Caspere knew, that we all knew, the Earth ain't dreamin' no more, kid. take a shot.
