Luke Skywalker has disappeared. It is a
time of uncertainty. Unrest grips the
galaxy as the influence of THE FIRST
ORDER spreads.
A glimmer of hope remains in the heroic
forces of the Resistance. General Leia
Organa dispatches her top pilot to recover
a clue that may lead to her missing
brother.
The dark enforcer Kylo Ren, obsessed with
the Skywalker lineage, learns of the
Resistance plan and arrives at the planet
Jakku to intercept the pilot...
>>63684164
Not a bad crawl actually. Well worded.
>>63684164
>Luke Skywalker has disappeared.
I'm disappointed but not surprised.
Well if the thread 404s soon we'll know it's real cause Disney lawyers.
>>63684262
Good point. OP better not be shitting us.
Is the planet Jakku close to the planet Jackoff?
>general leia
For what purpose?
>this is real
>the pastebin is real
>the movie is predictable
>the movie is safe
>the movie is middle of the road 6/10
Anyone who acts surprised has been deluding themselves, disney need to recoup 5 billion dollars here and this movie is carefully calculated to begin that process.
If you expected any significant amount of luke, snoke, or anything other than an ANH rehash you're a fool.
>>63684319
no allowed to call her princess anymore because it's 2015
>>63684262
>tfw somebody went to law school to browse 4chan and is probably contemplating suicide
>>63684164
>General Leia
>>63684164
>The dark enforcer Darth Vad...I mean, Kylo Ren
>>63684164
>A fanboy obsessed with a legend
Why do hack directors like JarJar Abrams have to have a character based on themselves in tbeir movies?
Treatment
Power Station Lower Level...
Han pleads with Ben, and asks him to take of his helmet. He tells him that
Snoke is only using him for power, asking him to come with him. Kylo says,
“I’m torn apart, father. But I know what I must do. Can you help me?” Han
replies, “Of course, son.” As they draw close to embrace, Kylo stabs Han
saying, “Thank you, father.” Han puts a hand on Ben’s face as he falls into a
dark abyss, silenced forever.
>>63684589
>>63684780
Why would she still be a Princess? The planet she was royalty on got blown up
>>63684297
>Jakku close to the planet Jackoff
>not the planet Jakkme
one job
disney lawers ain't got shit on me senpai
The Resistance Base...
Chewie, Finn and Rey return to the base with tears of joy and sorrow. They’ve
won a victory against the First Order and retrieved Rey, but the hero Han Solo is
dead. Rey bids a farewell to the injured Finn in the medical bay as C-3PO wakes
up R2 and together with BB-8, decipher the clue which unlocks a the location of
the lost Jedi, Luke Skywalker.
Leia and Rey have a special conversation about what has happened. Rey seeks
answers, but Leia tells her that she needs to talk to Luke. Leia bids her farewell
with, “May the Force be with you.”
Rey, Chewie, and BB-8 return to the Falcon and take off. Chewie playfully
messes up Rey's hair in an enduring gesture. They exit as the base watches.Luke's Refuge...
Chewie and Rey take the Falcon to a remote island of an unknown world.
Rey walks up stone steps holding the old lightsaber. As she opens the doors
to what appears to be a temple, we look past her into a large chamber. The
camera follows up some steps and stops on a robed figure sitting on a what
appears to be a throne. The figure looks up and lowers his hood revealing a
very melancholy looking Luke Skywalker.
Rey returns the saber to the old Jedi Master.
The music swells... The End...
>>63684927post yfw Kylo was actually confirmed to get slashed across the face by Rey, a first time lightsaber/force userFucken keks of keks
>>63684780
>>63684589
You faggots are stupid. She was just known as "Leia" after the first movie. Her home planet didn't exist any longer.
>>63685041The Woods...
As Rey and Finn try to get their bearings, Kylo stalks them into the woods. Unable to
find the Falcon, they’re turned around and seemingly lost.
They heroes come face to face with Kylo and there’s a verbal confrontation. Kylo
uses the Force to knock out Rey.
Feeling out of options and remembering what Maz said, Finn pulls the saber from
his belt and ignites it, the blue blade glowing in the night. Finn challenges Kylo with
the saber. Kylo responds by saying, “That weapon is mine!”
His bravery is immense, but Finn is quickly bested at Kylo's hand.
With Finn dying in the snow, Rey is unable to contain the Force swelling in her.
As Kylo attempts to use the force to pull Luke’s sword from the snow, it instead flies
to her hand and she too challenges Kylo. She gives him a gash on his face.
Unwilling to kill Rey, Kylo fights her to a draw. As Rey is about to land a blow, the
ground beneath them collapses. Kylo falls to an unknown fate. Rey runs back to
Finn’s side, sobbing.
Just as it seems all is lost Chewbacca arrives in the Falcon to gather the duo and
head for orbit.
STOP SPOILING THE FUCKING MOVIE JESUS CHRIST DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND SIMPLE MOD REQUESTS
>>63685120
I'm using the tags desu
>making a Star Wars film without Luke fucking Skywalker
disney dun goofed
>>63685039
>>63685136
not exactly, he appears at the end
and what I've just leaked isn't even everything, you'll see in the upcoming days
Are Finn or Rey the new jedi?
>>63685106
>Unwilling to kill Rey
Because she is his sister.
>>63685129
you should refrain altogether. everybody has the right to see it first, not unlike you stinking jews with priviledges
>>63685120
Who cares, Star Wars is shit anyway.
>>63685186
finn is no jedi
>>63685186
The grill stupid as leaked by the trailers and toys.
>>63685211
So he fughts with the light sabre... But... Is he not a Jedi?
>>63684164
i am literally too lazy to read the spolierz. pls tell me jar jar is the bad goy
>>63685106
So he didn't lose but held back?
That's a relief
>>63685203
I'm not any of that I just have a pdf of the treatment and thescreenplay :^))))
wANT SOME MORE ???Weapon Power Station Entry
Chewie and Han wait by the door, patiently waiting for Finn to open it but
growing concerned when time passes without word. They fight off
Stormtrooper patrols but they can’t hold them off forever as more patrols
are alerted of their presence.
Starkiller Base Command Center...
Captain Phasma calls in that Han Solo is near the power station and that
she’s on her way. Kylo overhears and leaves to intercept the heroes.
Comm Station...
Finn breaks into the comm office while Rey watches for patrols. Finn
quickly finds the controls to the power station door and flips the switch.
Weapon Power Station Entry
Han and Chewie are relieved when the door to the power station swings
open. They rush inside and knock out the door controls to buy themselves
time.
Comm Station...
Rey and Finn hop back on their stolen speeder to head back to help Han
and Chewie.
Above the base...
An X-Wing approaches the Starkiller Weapon housing and is about to
open fire as he’s hit by a missile. Across the airspace, X-Wings fall.
>>63685289
you are literally just copypasting the spoilerboard pdf, kill yourself you dumb fucking redditor
http://spoilerboard.blogspot.com/2015/12/spoilerboard-v33-force-awakens-movie.html
>>63684164
/spolier/ han solo is a joo /spoiler/
>>63685203
Haha fuck you
Don't go on the Internet if you don't want to spoile
Go hide in your safe space like the cuck you arekylo, hans son kills Han when he tries to connect with him even after all the evil shit he does POTTERY BRAVO JJ
>>63685289
Stop spamming fake spoilers. Its not funny anymore
>>63685041
Man that would be cool. If they're really about diminishing gender roles or whatever the fuck then her beauty should not matter, adventurers get scars don't they??
>>63684262
Do Disney lawyers care at this point? The movie comes out in three days, there isn't enough time for the hype to die.
>>63685321
I'm not OP
>>63685321
fucking this I just posting the crawl and this faggots ruining my thread
Fuck, so this one was fake
>>63685120
>implying it's the plot that makes a movie good
>>63685106She gives him a gash on his faceUnwilling to kill Rey, Kylo fights her to a drawAs Rey is about to land a blow, the
ground beneath them collapses
Anon, that shit doesn't make any sense at all. Why wouldKylo allow Rey to slash him across his face and almost kill him?
>>63685203
i mean you could just not mouse over the spoiler tags
>>63685289
Please ignore the asshurt retards.
They're too weak minded to not read what you're writing and get mad at you like absolute filth scumbags.
KEEP SPREADING THE LEAKS AWAKEN
>>63685449
It's a exposition for the next two movies
>>63685254
>didn't lose but held back
>gets his face slashed
Pick one
>>63685491
Hahaha gtfo with your bs 'spoilers'
they wouldn't kill off han in the first movie, would they? JJ isn't that much of a hack. han's got too much marketing potential for the next 2 movies. plus people would be majorly pissed.
>>63684164
Nice crawl Anon. All we need to add now is the theme song.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjMNNpIksaI
>>63684440
It's real. All of it.
>>63685545
>>63685339
Get fucked mickey damage control
Its too late
>>63685558
>JJ isn't that much of a hack
Wow you're in for a big shock
>>63685558
isn't he sick of star wars?
they probably begged for him to appear on the 3 movies but he didn't want to
>>63685558
kylo kills him
kylo is han's son
han's gone dude, just deal with it
>>63685545
>>63685339
What's not funny is you suck at your shitty job you fucking asshole Disney shill
Fuck right off and die
does Captain Phasma do something in the movie?
>>63685106Rey fights Kylo to a draw on her first sword fight
She's an independent womyn who don't need no man.
>>63685763
She is strong and powerful and does not need gender identity armor
>>63685763
no
It's a character made to sell toys and tickets
If i wanted a rehash of ANH with better written characters and romance i'd re-read Legacy.
>>63685238
Yeah you use it like a sword... not really a stretch of the imagination
>>63684253
He was supposed to fuck off at the end of jedi. It's a long time coming
>>63685810
>>63685903
i like christie. i hope she does well in this.
>>63685238
yeah. you, like, hit things with it.
>>63685202
nah either cousins or just very powerful and he'd rather turn her to the dark side than kill her ala vader and luke
>>63684164Why are they looking for Luke?
He has been missing for years, isn't he?
Why is he important now?
Does this mean Force use is hereditary? Only the specialist snowflakes can use it?
>>63684947
Darth Maul?
>>63686269
Because a map that may lead to him has appeared.
>>63685611
>>63685690
>Disney shill
Is that called someone who said that Kylo holding back and getting his face slashed because muh Rey made no sense and >>63685491
was replied to them?
Fuck off faggot.
>>63686321
You're post makes no sense and your shits all retarded
>People buttblasted that Rey can hold her own against Kylo
Anakin could podrace at hundreds of miles an hour at 8 years old, Luke made that 'impossible' shot in ANH and yet a woman who lives as a scavenger on a violent planet and who has been shown repeatedly in promo art holding a staff being proficient at hand to hand combat is somehow unbelievable.
>>63686283
Nigga, it's been hereditary since the first film.
>>63686309
No stakes on his search then?
Dissapointing
Episode VIII will reveal that Ren is a genderswapped clone of Anakin.
If Star Wars was all I had access to as a child in terms of sci-fi I probably would become one of those crazy fanboys, but thankfully I had access to anime from very early on in my youth years that my mental balance is very stable.
Seriously, if you have watched Akira, you'd realize just how sophisticated anime is and it blows away anything Star Wars would have to offer.
A lot of people mention Ghost In The Shell, which has just enough of sexuality in the mix to draw in the western audience I suppose but I must say that Ghost In The Shell is not even in my top 10 anime, not even close, that's just how deep the world of anime is.
Some anime is so disturbingly mature like Fractale that I wish it would challenge the system and submit it as a Drama category in the Oscars just to bitchslap the snotty Academy.
It's not just the level of maturity and sophistication anime has, it's also quite original, entertaining, and visually fantastic. I would regard anime as the highest form of cinema art-form.
But hey, me preaching about anime won't do you any good, you gotta go out and see it for yourself just how much you are missing.
The recent one I would recommend to check out is Sword Art Online which is light and easy to get into anime for the first time yet appreciate it as much, but if you want the heavy stuff right off the line check out Guilty Crown in which the plot is so complex and twisted that you'll need extra oxygen pumped into your brain in order to comprehend everything, and if you want amazing visuals and a gripping drama that also has awesome mecha battles Aldnoah.Zero is the shit.
Seriously, if you know anime like I do, Star Wars looks like it's something for little kids.
>>63686351
>You're
>>63686483
lol, a fair attempt, illrian
>>63684963
Then why the fuck was she handing out medals at the end?
>>63686483
Eww you're one of those
>>63686483
New pasta
>>63685400
Might not be. OP said he's quoting a treatment, not the final script, so they could have reworded it a bit.
>>63686483
wow
>>63685400
Why would someone take the time to fake this? It's probably real.
>Luke is in the movie for like two seconds
I will be pretty fucking pissed if this is true, desu family
>>63686568
She was in a high-ranking role before her planet was blown up, admittedly due to her role as princess, but also likely because of those opposed to the empire who knew of her Skywalker lineage.
Just because she lost her home planet doesnt mean her influence and experience in the rebels, working against the empire, should end.
>>63684947
YOU'RE TEARING ME APART LISA!!
>>63686664
Exactly. So her being a general wouldn't be strange.
>>63686506
>>63686578
>>63686624
I really mean it. Watch some elite-tier anime and you will realize the inherent inferiority of American-style story making. For something more in line with 4chan's and in particular /pol/'s tastes, you should definitely check out something like Legend of the Galactic Heroes or Berserk. It honestly will turn you into a more politically-savvy, sophisticated individual. High-brow anime can seriously expand minds, despite of all the negative propaganda and stigmas surrounding its fandom in the West.
>>63685400
>An odd number movie has a capitalized phrase in the crawl
JJ you fucked it up. It's ogre
>>63685449
You know what would be fucking hysterical?
If after all this SJW pandering they suffer the same fate as Whedon and his Avengers sequel. Because SJWs are basically impossible to please, they'll tear this movie apart for 'not doing feminism right' or 'not doing PoC characters right' or whatever.
Would love to see that talentless hack JJ on suicide watch.
>>63686410
I officially hate her character now so props to JJ I guess
>>63685039
>>63685106
>>63685289
been on reddit today, eh?
>>63686750
If what we read is accurate, Rey is a Mary Sue character and they will complain about that
>>63686750
They will definitely shit on this movie for something either its about rey or finn or phasma
Disney doesn't have a good track record with criticism though
>>63684164
>>63684947
>>63685039
>>63685106
>>63685289
>>63685321
Authentic Shooting Schedule leaked:
http://www.millennimfalcon.com
Le Reddit Reviews compiled:
http://millenniumfalcon.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?f=2015&t=9824
>>63684262
Disney here, thanks for this thread :)
>>63685808
>She's an independent womyn who don't need no man.
Unless it's Finn, whose love she needs :^)
>>63684297
Lol Mace Dindu XD
>>63685808
I'd fuck her though
>>63686044
Well I was not making that up.
She does NOTHING.
She's in between Boba and Jango Fett in dialogue and screentime
Also her face is never shown
>>63686720
Highbrow anime is a shadow of even mediocre examples of western adult film. You know this and you're memeing but I'm replying in case any easily swayed children read your post and take it seriously.
>>63684963
That's like asking why Vegeta still calls himself prince, after his planet blew up.
>>63686656
Motherfucker, you've never seen Super Smash Bros. fakes. This shit is nothing.
>>63684164
MOOOOOOOOOODZ
>Rey uses the mind trick out of nowhere
>Rey is skilled with a lightsaber without prior training
I'm sure they have a reason for this.If Rey appears to be what Luke was in A New Hope, it will be sexist
>>63684297
>Jack me?
No, Jakku!
>>63684947
>Thank you, father
>>63686729
Now THIS is autism
>>63686309
that doesnt answer why they want to find him though
>>63687038
Go to bed, JJ. I can't wait to see the tears once TFA is confirmed to be shit tier nostalgia crap.
>>63686939
They brainwashed her like they did with Revan?
>>63684164
MODS MODS MODS
>SJWs and Blacks on suicide watch since Boyega is not only not force sensitive, he's the C3P0 comic relief
Nice one JJ.
>>63686483
Here's your reply
Boyega: Mup da doo didda po mo gub dat tum muhfugen bix nood cof bin dub ho muhfugga *dies*
>>63687139
>instead of using a CGI alien as a proxy for black comedic relief, they just got a black guy who looked like an alien.
>>63686483
This is the most Reddit thing ever
>>63684440
Fuck me running... First MGSV, then Fallout 4, now this?
>>63686939
Because women have to be superior and flawless in modern day films or they get charged with misogyny.
>>63685449
i wouldn't mind her gash on my face
>>63686483
can someone post the p;astebin
>>63684164
nice going mods
damnit. i wanted to see pic of tittys not star wars shit
>>63686663
Search your feelings.You know it's true
>>63686483
More seriously, all of /tv/ should watch Utena and Gunbuster for their cinematic value. They are the masterpieces of the medium.
Soundtrack rip when
>>63687739
>dat image
I appreciate the effort, who ever made that.
>>63687739
Why would I watch the products of a failed Emperor's culture?
>>63686911
Western adult films are mostly about tough-guy posturing and canned plot lines repeated ad nauseum and none of them even gets near the level of say, Cowboy Bepop or Trigun. Go get cultured.
>A visual guide to leaks, rumors, and facts about the next Star Wars movie, updated regularly by thehiredgun.
>thehiredgun
One of us?
>>63686483
from imdb forums
>>63686825
>Authentic Shooting Schedule leaked:
Thought you meant theater shootings for a second there
>>63687085
She was a skilled lightsaber and mind trick user by the age of 5?
>>63687183
tips
Why did Luke go into hiding? Is he a coward?
>>63684164
>unrest grips the galaxy
I swear every beginning Star Wars text has a variation of this line. Is there ever a time when the galaxy isn't on the verge of war? Do they ever get along?
>>63688574According to leak:
>Best friend Han and Best Sister Leia have Best Nephew Ben.
>Best Jedi Luke starts teaching Best Nephew Ben the ways of the force, and being Best Uncle all around.
>Best Nephew Ben decides to screw the rules, for he has power, and murders all the other younglings learning with Best Uncle Luke
>Best Nephew Ben becomes Worst Enemy Kylo Ren
>Best Uncle Luke feels bad, and goes away to live with his shame, like Yoda did that one time he kind of lost to Palpatine but not really
>Also he might be searching for Tython or wherever the first Jedi lived in this canon. He's doing this for reasons.
>>63688653
Jesus that's embarrasing
>>63688610
>star WARS
So are these actually legit then?
I mean I don't give that much of a shit about the new film I'm just curious. I like the original three but it's been too long and the damage of the prequels has already been done.
If they are actually real then the film soundsokay
>>63686483
You had me up until
>mature like Fractale
Are you serious bro? The one with raped loli clones that reset the matrix? Pleb garbage.
>also recommending SAO and GC
you're the worst kind of person
i refuse to believe that han gets killed off. didn't they specifically say that he wouldn't
>>63688653
that's garbage
good thing i haven't liked star wars since i was 12
>>63686912
well Vegetas's a prideful faggot
>>63684164
Sounds like a fanfic plagiarized from previous crawls.
>>63687301
Underrated post
>>63685400
>>63689194
Hello friends!
This is a neighborly reminder that only dark sided redditors post spoilers without a tag!
Spoiler tags are in the sidebar and look like this when you post:
It will show up like this
Han and Leia die
Don't ruin stuff for other people, or you'll be frozen in carbonite (aka, a ban).
Seriously though, if you're at all questioning whether something is a spoiler or you might not be sure—USE THE SPOILER TAG OR YOU'LL GET BANNED.
>>63686410
Luke's shot was only impossible for cushy city boy fags that never fired a blaster in their lives, the real challenge was surviving the trench defense system. Terrible example on your part.
>>63686831
Zach here. Thanks man.
>>63689941
It's true, Luke could bullseye womp rats in his T-16 back home.
>>63689952
>>63684947
He didn't fly so good
OP is there any spinning?
>>63685763
Holds her penis
who cares about strawars ?
>>63690279
>don't do it son, I can only bail you out so many times!
>>63690429
>most impressive
>you'll find I'm full of strawprises
>>63690516
>you straw minded fool! He's using an old Jedi mind trick!
>>63690599
>I'm afraid I'm only an interpreter and not very good at telling strawies
>>63690429
>>63690516
>>63690572
>>63690599
>>63690636
>Extrawminate! EXTRAWMINATE!
>>63685254
>ReliefDude kills his own father in cold blood, tricking him into thinking like he has a chance to redeem his son, and then just impaling the guy.
Yes he hesitates when it comes to killing some random chick who not only has something he wants and is in his way, but who according to all the leaks so far, he has no connection with.
He has exactly 0 reason to kill his father but not kill Rey. His motivations are fucked up beyond belief if this shit is true.
And you call that relieving?
>>63690636
>>63690670
this shit needs to end now
>>63687188
lost
>>63685558 killing him would get all the spacement dwellers to get attached to the series more than already.
Cinema manager reporting in once more
Just had my technical run through of this in IMAX. Can confirm all spoilers are true. The film is a 6/10 at best.
>6/10
>>63685106
So what you are telling me is that THE FORCE AWAKENS in Rey?
Truly poetry.
>>63690669
>>63690753
What's raddits?
>>63690887
bro this is some next-level shit
>>63690699
Sure he has a reason to kill his father.. I says clearly in the script that that either Han dies or no Harrison Ford
>>63690874
>Just wait until Han gets a Force Ghost.
>>63690699
As if any of the characters have needed reasons for anything ever.
>>63686604
I second this. A new pasta is born.
>>63690887
>>63690906
You call this next level? In another thread, the worst case scenario occured to me. Until that's confirmed, I say we're in the green. When that comes though... Ho boy. We'll be in the wild space.Consider the following:
Luke is super special because he's the son of the big important Sith in the OT.
Vader is super duper special, because he was conceived by the Force.
What is the next level? Where can they go from here? And you know they fucking will go further. How do they make Rey special?Rey IS the fucking Force. Mark my god damn words.
By the end of this trilogy, it will be revealed that she's an Avatar of the Force, created because of some bullshit. Probably the same bullshit that made Luke go off in search of the first Jedi Temple for. They're going to pull a full 5th Element on us. I guarantee you.
>How does she figure out the Force on her own?
She is the Force.
>What does the title mean?
She awakens to her inborn power that surpasses any Jedi of the past.
What's more, I guarantee you Snoke will be the Dark Side version of this. He will have been born of/was affected by the immense dark energies left behind when Sheev bit the dirt, and Rey is the Force creating balance as a necessity.
>>63685106
> swelling inside her
the force or a nigger baby?
>>63691119
no pl0x not this... we alread had similar bullsht in clone wars and sucked ass
>>63691119
Fuck that sounds so immensely contrived, stupid and plausible
P O T T E R Y
O
T
T
E
R
Y
>>63691119
They already did this in The Clone Wars
>>63687235
Proof that /v/eddit cross posters are real and ruining /tv/
soylent green is people
>>63691119
That's actually not bad, though.
>>63691163
Here. This is for you.
>>63684164
Aren't you a little short to be an opening crawl?
>kylo ren ben
really?
Really?
>>63691327
>That's actually not bad, though.
As the guy who wrote it:
You do realize it would basically turn Star Wars into The Matrix, right? At the very least.
Dragon Ball Z wouldn't be far behind.
>>63685558
i got worried when it said finn lay dying until it said at the end he was being treated for his injuries
would have been awful to kill off 2 major characters in the first episode like that
>>63691345
Yeah, should be three paragraphs.
I just wanna know what's the big twist with the villain? who is the sith master?
The very epitome of lazy design
>>63691119
>KYLO REN
>sKYwalker/soLO
Are we sure Lucas didnt write this one?
>>63691778
Apparently he does look differently.
>>63691781
Nah, it's a very lazy take on the old and busted EU
>Kylo's real name is Ben
>Luke's son's name in the old EU is Ben
>Han and Leia's son is trained by Luke, but gets seduced by the dark side and wrecks some serious shit around the Galaxy
>>63691808
Only a little bit, according to people who saw the film. Pretty much the same, but without sunken cheeks and a huge scar across his pale face.
The fuckers couldn't even work out the final design for that guy. Geez.
>>63690930
YeahHan Solo dies, alsoThe girl is the jedi. Oh yeah and finallyLuke has spent the last 30 years being a useless piece of shit in wales because he turned Solo's kid into Vader2.0
>>63691781
hes supposed to be jacen solo/darth caedus but now hes named after ben skywalker
>>63691825
is JJ just ripping off EU shit while disney refuses to acknowledge it as canon so his ideas seem original?
>>63691946
Something like that, yes. Take some of the old stuff, change the name yadda yadda
>>63691119
this is way too scary, im worried its true. movie tv writers always have to oneup the previous movie/ season.
>>63691946I hope they rip off the idea of the Emperor living forever via cloning
>>63691987
Spooped you have I?
I spooped myself too.
Let us hope I was wrong.Though we both know, that it's either this or something just as bad. Don't we?
Im callng it now.
Episoode 8 will kill off luke skywalker
epidsode 9 will have a jedi nigga baby doing cgi lighsaber combat
Hi all, reddit here
Just a reminder to please please PLEASE use spoiler tags! :)
I'm going to see this movie with my wife's son and I really don't want it to be spoiled for me - thanks /TV/!
>>63685488
>>63685488
Are you literally braindead? The link he just posted (http://spoilerboard.blogspot.com/2015/12/spoilerboard-v33-force-awakens-movie.html) has had all this information and more, in correct sequence order since at least yesterday.
He's just copy/pasting snippets to derail a thread that started with new legit information.
>>63692087
>my wife's son
What did you mean by this?
>>63690882
Doesn't matter, the critics will say it's better than the prequels, and the OT man-children and fake Star Wars Girls will eat it up.
>>63692120
My wife's son. How hard is that? If you want the full story, I posted it earlier, pic relation
>>63685238He hits a few stormies with the saber. When he actually has to fight with it he gets his forearm swiftly removed by Kylo.
Rey then uses it to fight off Kylo
>>63685210
This
The spoilers have only indicated that the movie will be cliche as ever
>>63692201
it doesnt say that it says he lies dying which implies he gets stabbed rather than his arm cut off
Repeat after me: "there are only three Star Wars movies, and the last one was made in 1983". Muslims pledge that there's only one God and Mohamed is his prophet, right? Well, this is the Star Wars pledge that should be an article of faith after the wringer SW has been through.
>>63688653
Why does this have to be so edgy? Man fuck this new Star Wars.
What about the chinese guys from The Raid movies, do they do something important. Only reason why i want to watch this(actually never watched a star wars movie)
Where can I get the spoilers from?
How important is the nigger to the movie?
>>63686483
When I was a chubby virgin teen, I watched hundreds of anime. I had posters, figurines, manga tankobons, I had truly chosen the path of virginity; a disgusting otaku. Almost all of it is self-indulgent, trite bullshit drawn by underpaid Koreans. The heroes are 90% of the time some skinny manlet with retarded looking hair and girly voice; they're always effeminate but somehow win the interest of multiple women. The kind of fantasy only lonely teen boys would think of; so sad that most of this shit is written by adult (presumably permavirgin) men. Remember, this stuff is created for an island of people who have almost given up on sexual intercourse entirely. Anime is a symptom of the celibacy syndrome that consumes Japanese and is making them extinct.
After I grew up, got /fit/, started getting more into film and had a few girlfriends, I realized that even shitty flicks like Star Wars are better than pretty much every anime. Actual cinematic production values and actors giving real performance are way better than shitty drawings and high pitched voice actors. The only really remarkable anime is Legend of the Galactic Heroes, which is essentially just a more political, less imaginative Star Wars with worse fights.
After you've gotten bored of all the same repetitive tropes, you realize 99% of anime is shit. Every year maybe 3 anime shows/films worth watching come out, but even that is giving the entire medium too much credit. I'd never pay to watch an anime in theaters, waste of money. At least taking some chick to see Star Wars might get you laid by the end of the night.
>>63685558
Harrison Ford has been trying to get Han killed for 3 movies. He hates Star Wars shit.
>>63687235
>not playing Witcher 3
>not having feels upon feels
Your own fault.
>>63692087
>my wife's son
>>63693127
No he doesn't, he just didn't want Han to die in an inhonorable way
>>63692120
>>63692087
>>63693268
>>63687235
fuck off
>>63692151
>that story
>>63685120
>Being on 4chan within two weeks of something you care about coming out.
People never learn.
>>63693303
Harrison Ford wanted Han to die at the end of Empire Strikes Back.
>>63687072
Well he helped them out last time they faced a force user.
>>63693074
Congratulations for taking the bait
anyone get the sountrack from amazon app or what? share that shit
>>63685120
>muh pleb wars stop it guise
lol
Pretty much how it looks like in the actual thing:
http://www.starwars.com/games-apps/star-wars-crawl-creator/?cid=5670f202e4b005976b051657
>>63693304
Rename file to "The Force Awakens"
>>63694158
>Luke Skywalker homages to Return of the Jedi
>Leia's mention homages to A New Hope
>"obsessed with the Skywalker lineage" homages to Empire
It's like poetry
>>63685120
Your pain and angish nourish me
>>63685120
most pleb/reddit post in weeks. well reddit'd
>>63694172
>>63693304
>Kylo "Cleanup" Ren in the background.
>>63690699
sure Kylo has reason to be conflicted. He idolizes Vader, but himself has not fallen totally to the dark side. Killing his father is something he needs to do to fall further to the dark side.
People question that Kylo shows no conflict or remorse in killing an entire solar system. Pressing a doomsday button you don't really get the feel for the consequences of what you're doing. I doubt Truman slept any worse after nuking Japan.
Some of you are just grasping for reasons the movie makes no sense.
>>63685358
Your are a faggot tho.and I'm not that guy buddy
>>63689674
You can clearly see his jacket and white hair in the first trailer, ded. Fokn nuub.
>>63684319
shouldn't it be Queen Leia by now?
>>63689922
I know your fat
Do you miss me yet /tv/?
>>63695684
YES
>>63684297
Everytime I hear Jakku reminds me of that Hentai site
>>63684589
>because it's 2015
When and why and how did this meme start? What's its meaning? With all of the race issues, we might as well say it's 1960
>JJ makes a movie where there's lots of action, drama but nothing really happens
Sounds about right. Gotta make dem sequels
>>63684319
>>general leia
>For what purpose?
It should be General Organa. You don't call generals by their first names. You can do that with princesses like people did with Diana and Grace.
>>63684947
this actually sounds good
>>63695684
say what you want about lucas being shit he deserves it but at the very least he did something different with the prequels and isnt literally copy pasting the OT
>>63695871
doesn't sell toys so nope
>>63695684
When the smoke clears, people are going to remember the Lucas era, Jar Jar and all, with fondness compared to the Disney horror that awaits.
Okay, I need to know and no one's telling me. IfKylo Ren is the son of Han and Leiahow did they not realize this? Did they just lose a baby and never mention him again?
>>63695939I still have a bunch of Jar-Jar toys from when I was a kid. No shame.
>>63695939
I really doubt it. Disney fatigue is inevitable but it will never reach "Disney ruined my childhood" levels.
