>go to star wars premier
>get shot
Security will be tight, there will be no shootings.
This isn't a DC movie, brah. Wait for Batman v Superman. People will definitely die during it. Now Suicide Squad? That'll be a blood bath.
I'm purposely going to go in the middle of release day to stay away from the massive crowds.
>amerishots
>>63563161
There's at most a 50/50 chance of this happening, don't be a pussy.
>>63563176
theres going to be at least one shooting, theres no way this goes off without a hitch, its way too big
>>63563176
*chimpanzee noises*
>>63563161
my employer (a semi-big Silicon Valley dot-bomb) is paying for a company wide private screening.
should i go?
>>63563161
You forgot:
> BE AMERICAN
The rest of the world doesn't have this problem.
Will Batman be in it? Then no.
>>63563238
Yes
>seeing Star Wars
You should shoot yourself to deprive him the chance :^)
I just hope it's not a white shooter desu, can't wait for his mental health to be totally ignored because it looks so much better in the headlines to say he's an upset racist who didn't want a black lead in star wars
Deflect the bullets using the force
>be American
>go to cinema
>get shot
>this is somehow completely acceptable
>>63563176
>implying the shooter won't be one of the security guards
>>63563176
south park lol
Good. Less libcûcks and plebshitters on my earth.
Religion of peace needs to strike more often and around the world.
>living in america
>go to see the DC flick "Suicide Squad" at the theatre
>Jared Leto in full Joker getup shoots up in the place before OD'ing on sleeping pills as he mumbes something about his mom and heath something
>>63563161
> go to star wars premier
> you deserve to get shot
fixed.
>>63563827
I more worried about murrican protestants than muslimes desu. Hardore islam just eats up follower's brain in few year and he turns into mostly harmless slug living in slums. Meanwhile murricans have world's most powerful airforce to back them up if they go apeshit.
>>63563827
but Christianity is attacking several countries right now anon
>>63563882
>>63563902
t. Mohammed
>>63563902
>>63563882
Thanks for the post, Muhammad al-Shabeeb Maliq Affliq Ibrahim Abdullah Inshallah Pooinloo Mohammed Mehommed Muhommad Mohummod Mahommod Mahummud.
>>63563979
I thought murricans are asleep at this time?
>>63563930
>>63563979
we bomb towelheads, they fight back
> this is an outrage! how dare they!!
dumb americunts get dumber by the day
I was thinking about posting a thread on this.
How much revenue do you think is (and will) be lost due to fear of a theater shooting? 1%? 5%? 20%?
>>63564027
t. Muhammad al-Abdelrahman
>>63564028
its only Amerikek that has this shit and its now only 30% of the market. Disney dont care.
But you will die for a good cause
Trump's election and the then inevitable showdown with Islam
>>63563176
Yeah, security is tight at every single theater in the country
>>63563176
>yfw they go from 1 gun free zone sign to 2 gun free zone signs
> America is such a 3rd world shithole that they are scared of going to the movies
>>63564105
>gun free zone
What the fuck is even this? Zone created by magic generator where guns just disappear?
>>63563224
>its way too big
for you
>>63564134
> what is a metal detector and body search
12 year olds arent allowed on here.
>>63563327
>Be Brit
>go to cinema
>see SW movie
>like it
>decide to go to store to buy SW action figure
>cop sees the tiny little plastic gun that comes with the action figure
>get 20 years on weapons charges
>>63564128
>Gary, Indiana
Shit Freddie Gibbs wasn't lying.
The only logical solution to this problem is to arm everybody with guns so they can defend themselves
>>63564134
You suffer a severe damage penalty if you use guns in the area
>>63564194
So there will be long queue to enter a movie theater? Fucking great
>>63564216
works for somali
>>63564216
worked so well for the TKDR shooting
when will burgerfats learn?
>>63564128
why is richmond VA on there twice with different numbers?
who made this chart?
>>63564216
> shooter starts killing people in the theater
> 200 people start shooting back randomly in a dark room, everybody is killed due to crossfire.
please dont breed.
white "people" are fucking insane
>>63564252
> 200 people start shooting back randomly in a dark room, everybody is killed due to crossfire.
I would pay to see this unlike the actual TFA
>>63564261
amerishoots are insane
>>63563288
>Mental Illness excuse to let white males get away with shootings
kek, worst than blacks with their "race card"
Whites just have a culture of violence that stems from the colonial days.
Ban muslims and Blacks from Cinemas, problem solved.
>>63563176
>buy ticket for the first showing
>movie theater TSA suddenly stop me
>ask why I'm moving so fast and not looking at anybody
>"who are you going to this movie with, sir?"
>people are starting to notice the commotion
>stutter out that I just wanted to see it alone for a second time and didn't want to bother my friends
>"how could you be seeing Star Wars again? It just came out"
>eyes start to water. I d-don't want to see it any more. Sorry to bother you. I'm just going to go home, thanks
>movie security start chasing and shouting to stop
>they call link up to national NSA database on my profile from credit information on ticket purchase. find many anti-semitic comments against famed American Star Wars director JJ Abrams on 4chan (known terrorist site)
>start screaming at me that I am detained and need to stop resisting.
>patriotic theater patron unsheathes his gun and shoots me in the back to protect theater
>national uproar. a news dialog questions if theater security was right to suspect currently hospitalized Anonymous of being a terrorist when he attending a debut theater showing alone and had a red flag background
>obama addresses the nation. urges calm and not to let fear win but also humorously asks if maybe next time people thinking of going to the theater alone like Anonymous would ask their girlfriend
>bullet wound permanently damages gut. need to use colostomy bag for the rest of my life
>Donal Trump calls Anonymous a weirdo faggot that deserved it
>>63564216
Yes let's give infants automatics so that they could defend themselves from school shooters. I'm sure there's no way that could backfire.
Oh Americlaps. Please never change.
>>63564356
>Aurora shooting
:^)
Everyone needs to concealed carry to the cinema.
>>63563176
HOL UP
>>63564216
>>63564717
This.
If everyone has a gun, then nobody has a gun.
>>63563161
No,no, check a sec...
>you go to premiere of SW
>it totally sucks, its so bad it hurts
>Jar Jar is actually cool compared to shit you had to put up with
>after 3 hours , the "movie" is finally over
>you get up, you are filled with anger and go for exit
>on exit you see some funny guy with "that nignog" mask
>he sprays with AR-15 in crowd and blows his brain with last bullet
>you dont feel anything, you try to make a step towards exit but you fall
> you feel something warm in center of your abdomen, you...
>you wake up in hospital, you are paralyzed from neck to down
>all you can think of is 3 hours of that god damn shitty family space soap opera by Disney that made you immobile for the rest of your life
>doc says recovery will last at least for 6 months until they can release you from hospital
> all you can do is watch white ceiling and see faces from the movie in small imperfections in paint
>this is rest of your life, you contemplate on how shitty SW was , immobilized , all the while whole cast is laughing at you from ceiling
USA gun regulation laws..
What do you think, would shootings happen if everyone is checked for weapons on entrance
or
every fucking person in theater is carrying
>>63564865
if everybody shoots back, then nobody gets shot.
>>63565068
If people actually had to do real background checks to own a gun.
>go to the movies to see the new star wars film
>brought my gf because no singles policy
>check in my falcon at the falconry room
>go take a shower, but notice I forgot my shampoo at home
>theater shower inspectors tell me that I need to use shampoo
>try to tell them that I used shampoo when I showered yesterday and that you shouldn't use shampoo every day
>shower inspectors don't subscribe to the "don't shampoo every day" theory
>forced to pay $5 for shampoo rental
>finally get done with showering and get to my seat
>movie finally starts and its great
>designated theater shooter comes in, as expected
>get shot
>last thing I see is my gf having sex with a big black bull
>>63563327
it enhances the thrill and suspense of the movie-going experience you dumb pussy
>>63563161
But I'm not american anon.
>>63565649
then you arent human.
get off our website.
>go to meet with a friend at theater
>he doesn't show up
>mum isn't coming till 2 hours or so
>want really bad to see this movie
>try to buy a ticket
>ticket intendant ask where is my partner
>"j-just me"
>she tenses
>"it is not permitted sir"
>she stares
>"please leave the place now"
>lined people on my back whispering
>notice the security hologram staring as well
>abandon line, people go back to their business
>while thinking i'm gonna have to stay in the cells till my mums return see a couple heading to the fish shop
>he has a falcon and she a cute pidgeon
>approach, try to hold my spaghetti
>tell him what happened and ask him if i can borrow his falcon, just to see the movie
>they look uncomfortable all the time and make excuses
>almost begging them now
>guy says "look dude we don't want any trouble ok, just leave us alone"
>one of the security holograms approaches, ask if everything is alright
>guy says "this person is bothering us, he say he's alone"
>the hologram turns to me, guy's girlfriend is hiding behind him, looks terrified
>"sir, we already asked you to leave the facilities"
>"yes, but i can't go anywhere, my m-mum is not coming yet"
>"please sir, wait in the cells till you're ready to leave the facilities"
>"i just want to see this movie, my friend couldn't come you see -"
>the girls pidgeon is shitting all over and trying to flee
>"the time for warnings is ended"
>i know what's coming
>behind me, a secret door opens and a theater gladiator throw me a net
>try to run but too late, fall to the ground
>the gladiator drags me away, all the people is staring
>throws me to the cells and locks the door
>had to wait two hours for my mum to come and rescue me
Luckily one of the guys there had already seen the movie and told me all aboit it, he was arrested at the end for going downstairs without helmet.
>>63566064
jesus fucking christ, dont go into writing, ever.
>At Star Wars premiere
>Some retard decides its a good idea to chuck a hand grenade into the movie theater exhaust
>>63565897
you're probably even serious, ridiculous.
>>63564233
>works for somali
Somalis are the niggers of Africa.
>living anywhere other than the south
>living anywhere that's not at least 85% white
>living anywhere that there are more starbucks than churches
It's your own fault.
>>63566549
>says don't live in a place where whites are a minority
>says live in the south
>>63566703
I don't know where you live in the south but I live just outside the second biggest city in my state and it's 81% white.
>If only everyone had a gun
God I hope not, after Aurora I'm still scared of going to theaters, I honestly can't even look at the buildings without feeling sick.
>>63566800
>81% white
>This is seen as a high percentage of whites in the 21st century
>jarjar binks comes through the emergency door with an assault rifle and begins unloading on the crowd
>notices my cape, theatre falcon, and bucket of crab legs
>notices i managed to get past the no singles policy, penis inspection, and preshow shower interrogation
>tips his jardorabinkbink in my direction and allows me to live as he tells everyone to spin, it's probably a good trick
>>63566800
the south is the blackest part of the nation you moron
who do you think imported all these fucking niggers in america and ruined, southern whites.
do you also want to see the crime statistics of america, what part do you think has the most crime?
>>63564089
I've never been to a theater that had security.
Fear of mass shooting is contributing to mass shooting culture in America which helps create those shootings in the first place.
> if everyone had AIDS then nobody would get raped.
come on America, we've done the Star Wars psycho shit months ago. stop copying Alpha Europe
>>63564201
That's what I love about this Brit-American arguing
Americans literally have to make stuff up in order to make their point, or they bring up laws from different countries
White people commit mass shootings on a weekly basis in the States, find me the last time that happened in this country
Or find an example of someone being arrested for having a fake gun on them in the past 5 years
Or try to criticise anything to do with the UK without bringing brown people into it
>>63567668
nice teeth
>>63567668
> a country with freely available guns has shootings while a country without guns doesnt.
thanks Sherlock, what would we do without you?
>>63564594
Beautiful m8
>>63567745
Sorry, yeah, that makes it okay then I guess
>>63567668
the UK knife attacks is twice that of the USAs, mostly by white people. so if you had guns you'd be just as bad you stupid cunt.
your hospitals are crammed every weekend with violent drunken white people who have injured each other. America doesnt have this at all.
>>63567834
Probably because it costs $3000 for a checkup in America
>>63567874
enjoy giving 20% of your wages to pay for violent drunks medical care.
>>63567698
lmao what a shit stereotype, what are you gonna throw out next 'nice tophat'?
>>63567130
>mass shooting culture
oyvey
>>63563839
its a good song f.a.m
>it's a 2 countries having a dick-swinging contest thread
>>63564342
I agree, we were kings after all.
>>63563245
>Implying Paris didn't happen
Arrogant, self-important Europeans thinking that they're anything more than barbarians has stopped becoming funny.
>>63567668
>Be Britkuk
>go to theater
>its in an unmarked sharia zone
>get dragged into the street and beheaded by pakis
>find picture of daughter in wallet with address
>daughter gets abducted and sold into sex slavery
truly a peaceful place
>>63570710
>go to theatre
>in Britain
>sneak in some bacon to go with my crab legs
>arrested for hate crime
>25 year sentence
