ERP Thread #2625165 or something. Titty edition.
Old and busted: >>887857
>>891974
First for FUCK HOMESTUCK. PRAISE METTATON.
Okay guys. This is Mettaton. The real one. I quit, forever. This is truly the end, I guess they got what they wanted. So it does pain me a little that this is how it ends, but... yep. I am not talking in CAPS because of the severity of the situation. The troll somehow managed to use fake screencaps, so it's pointless. Please remember me not as this troll was. Remember me as a shitposter, that died a hero. Goodnight.
>>892002
"Once the image limit is hit" dude. Not now.
Real Mettaton picked the other thread >>892009
>>892010
Goddamnit.. .That means I am OUT OF A JOB.
Homestuck fags have to ruin anything good.
They're trolls for fuck sake.
If this troll hurts anyone, if he lies to anyone, I'm sorry. Goodbye, folks, and have a good one.
Who wants their pelvis pulverized?
>>892076
Me
>>892076
I want my jaw Jacqli'd!
>>892099
I'll grab the jackhammer!
>>892109
You want your vulva vacuumed?
AWW WHO AM I KIDDING? I CAN'T STAY AWAY FROM MY LOYAL AUDIENCE.
>>892119
no! yours!
I want your cunt consumed!
>>892119
Um I don't think this is what I signed up for :|
>>892059
Goodbye Mettaton. Maybe one day we can chat on Steam.
>>892130
Yes, I can.
>>892133
Shame. Would you prefer your cock clobbered?
>>892132
Why not get your nads nibbled instead?
>>892146
STOP POSTING YOUR FAKES, HOMESTUCK TROLL. I'M ON TO YOUR GAMES AND YOU WILL NOT FORCE ME TO ABANDON MY BELOVED AUDIENCE.
>>892154
I'm sorry, folks. I have another persona in a Discord. I'll talk to the people there and we'll work something out.
>>892149
That depends, does it involve power tools like the last one?
>>892173
How do we know Mettaton didn't go to sleep when he said, and that this isn't a way for the Homestucks to contact us on Discord?
I want to fuck wriggle nightbug
>>892196
>wanting to fuck a boy
Gaaaay
>>892149
I want my lips lathered (with your own!)
>>892196
same
>>892219
When did you get this lewd poppy :|
>>892243
She got mind broken in the Discord
>tfw you'll miss out on all the ERP lore cuz you're not in the Discord
>>892214
>2016
>Not wanting to fuck a boy.
>Get with the times.
>>892273
Not even worth
>>892243
Jacqli is best girl from Ar Tonelico! how could I not want her?
>>892278
They're still getting their claws into posters who, I guess, aren't paying attention. If anyone want to, do something better than what I can think of. I'd warn him, but that just gives the trolls another opportunity.
>>892331
Who are you quoting?
>>892341
I'm showing you a post of one of the homestucks and their weird typing. a few people didn't migrate to this thread.
>>892286
>>892219
You have great taste, Smurfette. I'll guess i'll have to owe you one wet, sloppy smooch when I feel like it.
>>892176
Sure does. You can also opt to have your dick demolished.
Okay so what the hell did I miss? Something about discord fighting and homestuck imposters? This all seems really petty and stupid. Let's just chat/fap
>>892350
That thread is 10 images away from the bump limit, they'll probably show up soon
>>892360
could I maybe be allowed to pleasure you?
>>892360
You know what I'll go for it. Extra demolishing please
>>892367
I honestly don't even know how to sum it up at this point. Point is I think we really lost Mettaton this time. Because too many in the thread can't follow standard attention whore protocols.
>>892409
not right now! sorry Anon!
>>892409
On the one hand yes, but if the thread is so defenseless against their trolling that it becomes not fun anymore, why stay?
It's the awful thing about trolls, unless you unite against them, they win either way, they either suck all the fun out and make you stay, or force you to leave.
>>892383
Give 'em and inch and they try to take a mile. We'll leave that in maybe territory.
>>892390
One shaft shattering, coming right up.
>The girl effortlessly lifts the noisy jackhammer, easily twice her size, above her head with a malicious grin.
You can go ahead and get into position.
>>892425
I knew when homosucks started posting here the threads would go downhill! that's why I've just been playing monster hunter instead!
>>892443
give me an inch! over and over again! I want an inch from you a lot!
>>892448
Even as we speak, Jiro is talking to the same troll as a new character, pretending no to be the troll so as to hide in the group and jump out and ruin everything again in the future. He's still back in the old thread.
>>892454
What a hopeless pervert you are, Smurfette. Don't you have any decency?
I accidentally slept too long again ;-;
but I'm awake now... <3
>>892465
>Jiro is talking to the same troll as a new character
(I'm doing what now? I didn't even know they were such a huge problem.)
>>892489
I think Poppy might be able to explain it best. She left and avoided all the drama the troll(s) caused so she might be most objective about it.
>>892483
decency is for everyone else! I want Jacqli!
>>892486
Speak of the devil lol
>>892489
Don't respond to the homestucks
>>892489
Short version: We were and still are invaded by Homestucks, They "type 8adly, like t)(is." and this thread provides them a constant stream of new victims in each time zone.
>>892489
>>892496
ever been to /co/? before ponies made it terminal the cancer of the board was homestuck threads! and before homestuck threads became such a malignant tumour /co/ was one of the best boards!
>>892489
I should clarify, it's not their typing we hate, that's just a way to spot them. It's the fact that they impersonate other players to cause drama, and (intentionally?) drive Mettaton away.
>>892496
>>892508
>>892512
>>892515
(Well, shit. My bad, guys. I'll try and be more careful in the future)
>>892525
You didn't have any malice. This is just how they operate. And if we respond to their posts directly and say "stop trolling the people who just woke up." They try to make it look like they're just playing normally and "muh victim mentality" everyone hates them because Homestucks are soooooooo oppressed.
>>892492
You signed up to get your mast mangled, buddy. I think you're trying to take advantage of me.
>>892501
Oh, please. I suppose i'll humor you, just when i'm more awake.
>>892486
Sorry if we're not responding much, Peach, it's been a clusterfuck of a day.
And it's possible some are questioning if it's really you.
>>892536
I want to make you feel so good you start singing!
We could make it a required part of all new threads, a copypasta.
"Do not respond to Homestuck posters
Hide Homestuck posts
Be vigilant."
>>892536
I just think the mangling will be much much better if I'm hard you know
>>892515
Awwwww shit, the old /co/ days.
I never understood why the Homestucks couldn't just have one general like the rest of us, they had to invade every thread.
>>892553
Don't make such a big deal about it and just ignore them. Trolls feed off attention and that's what you're giving them. I'm sure if we just ignore them they'll get bored and leave
>>892535
(Thanks for the heads up.)
>>892486
Good morning, Princess. I trust you've slept well?
>>892568
Wow, a post from two days ago!
Does anyone know a way to send lottery numbers back in time for this guy?
>>892548
And why should I grace you with my amazing voice, now? I'd like to see you try though.
>>892554
Soft, hard, it's all the same to the jackhammer. You want your pecker pummeled or not?
>>892585
Is that an open invitation or no,
>>892606
Eh, just a joke about how when the Homestucks first showed up, a couple anons said to ignore them, but it didn't work, cause it's hard to coordinate such things, and not everyone was around for the Homestuck invasion of /co/.
Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.
>>892620
It just seems by vilifying them and separating them you're just adding more fuel to the fire. I remember seeing some homestuck erpers that were just chilling and weren't causing any problems in the previous thread but blaming homestuck in general makes it an us vs them kinda mentality
>>892585
because your song is beautiful and glorious and I want nothing more than to hear it and to be your inspiration!
>>892606
Good. Let's get those balls busted!
>She licks her thin lips as he moves into position, hovering the live power tool over his pelvic area. After ensuring that she has the angle just right, she drives down with a cackle...only to stop an inch before.
Just kidding! Who the hell is in to crap like that?
>She tosses the jackhammer aside as easily as it was lifted and begins to walk away, only pausing to turn around and stick her tongue out.
Maybe you should see a professional.
>>892617
You too, weirdo.
>>892658
How about a cock cradling?
>>892658
Damn. And here I have 25 shmeckles to spend.
>>892541
Like an imposter? Well I can respond to emails I guess...
>>892502
Hello Anon!
>>892571
Gonna head back to bed soon~
>>892658
Lol I was wondering if you would go through with it or not. Glad I can keep my balls. Also one could say that you have no balls for not going through with it
>>892677
Hey peach :) I still want to play smash I've got everything set up but I've been busy because of school. It doesn't help that my sleeping schedule is fucked up so I'm tired during the day
>>892677
So soon? What a shame, but at least you gave us all some delicious eye candy~
>>892670
I think psychiatric help is more than that. Start saving.
>>892656
You really know how to lack it on thick, you know that? I don't completely hate it.
>>892667
I would've settled on a tuckus tickling.
>>892679
Do you really think I have any interest in ruining your genitalia beyond recognition?
I hope you people are less strange when I wake up.
>>892721
I wouldn't mind a tuckus tickling, especially if it came with a meat mouthing.
>>892721
I didn't know what to expect since this is my first time talking with you. I was hoping for a handjob or something can't fault me for trying :)
>>892742
>she bobs on his cock feeling it grow. Her throats tickles from the amount of precum
>>892010
Thank god that Mettaton meme was annoying as fuck to see all the time to read.
>>892776
>the hand on her head begins to tighten its grip a bit as he rears his head back from her mouth indulging itself of his cock
>>892815
Mm~ Jiro.. Who new it wAs this divine~!
Good morning everyone!~
>>892849
>he gives her a lecherous grin, his eyes glinting with pleasure and carnal desire
Take it in deep, Cassandra~ Earn my cum.
>>892870
>Her head moves forward, the whole shaft submerged in her throat, the sweet pre coating her innards.
>>892866
You missed what was probably the shittiest thread in history.
>>892888
That's quite the understatement.
Like calling the surface of Pluto, "A tad nippy."
>>892888
(Toriplu check!)
Y-yeah, I just went ahead and read the nightly threads and they were.. awful.
But..
>Miyafuji blushed and covered her cheeks with hands, shaking her head.
Anzu-chan did some cute lewd things!~
>>892885
>his cock shudders and throbs inside her, feeling the tip touch the back of her throat and he lets out his words in a groaning voice
Good girl, very good girl~
>>892912
>She holds it there, her tongue putting all the work hoping for a release to sustain her hunger.
>>892721
I can't help it! Jacqli is just so wonderful!
>>892929
>his semen travels up through his shaft, causing it to swell and pulsate in her mouth for a brief moments before he lets out a moan when he ejaculates inside her mouth, filling her throat with his warm, pent-up cum
Don't waste a single drop, my pet~
>>892942
(I won't~ but as it seems I have to go see ya!)
>>892955
(Thanks for the fun, have a good one!)
Rivers belong where they can raaaamble
>tfw no one to put you to bed
>>893029
Just get in the goddamn bed and if you don't cry maybe I'll read you a fucking bedtime story or something
>>893029
hello kitty!
>>893043
Meooooow <3
>tries clambering onto you
>>893053
>I gently pat your head.
You were a lewd little kitty last night weren't you?
>>893068
Meeeeew >///<
>resists the temptation to try and suckle from you
>>893107
>I place my tiny palm under your chin leading your face to mine. I tenderly plant a kiss on your forehead as my other hand strokes through your hair.
You been a good kitty today?
>>893143
I hope so!
I milked my master so I bet he thinks I'm a good kitty ^w^
>>893151
Leeeeewd!
I've not done anything lewd today really ;_;
>>893159
You never do anything lewd! You keep saving yourself for that hero and you'll never find him in this whore house! A big burly man with big-ass pauldrons is not gonna walk through that door asking for a hammer!
>>893159
I haven't.. in weeks almost now.
Don't feel bad, it's fun to see you around these hours now Poppy.~
>>893159
And I'm tired -w-
>leans on you for a nap
>>893174
>I hold you tight in my arms and my small fingers dance over your skin as I nuzzle my mouth into the nape of your neck.
Such a good kitty!
>>893168
y-yeah.
>>893169
haven't you been groping ladies?
So have things gotten less stupid?
Or just more quiet?
>>893184
I'm sorry, Poppy. I tried using fate and coincidence and hoped that the man I described would show up, I didn't really mean to yell at you.
>>893174
Too tired to play, neko-chan?
>>893184
>I squeal lots at your delightful and ticklish touch, trying to squirm out of your grip
>Eeeeee! Meeeeew >///<
>>893214
Yes 3:
>>893184
W-well yes, I've done that but not recently either.
>>893187
It's the usual somewhat quiet afternoon hours again as everyday.
>>893223
If you say so, I won't push it.
>>893217
>I kiss dotingly along your neck as I hold you and I reach a hand up to scratch behind your ear.
>>893219
Can we hold hands instead?
>>893245
Do you roleplay on 4 plus 4 chin?
>>893285
No. I barely even do anything like that here if you'll believe what gets said about me.
>>893245
Push?
This isn't just normal dead. This is...advanced dead.
I've been edging for an hour. Someone, please, make me cum, quick!
>>893389
A-awooo!!
>>893389
>an hour
Oh, woe is you. Keep going,
Good Morning~!
I fell asleep last night at 9 and I woke up this morning at 8 again, I feel amazing!
I made a nice breakfast sandwich and I'm on my second cup of coffee, mornings are nice <3
>>893438
Ohaiyo princess.~
That's nice to hear.
>>893438
I'll take a bacon egg and cheese on a bagel.
>>893438
I want to cum in your ass, Peach-chan!
>>893470
Pick up line of the year.
>>893445
Isn't it? I really don't usually appreciate mornings but they're nice <3
>>893446
I had something similar~! egg cheese ham katchup on a english muffin <3
>>893470
l-lewd..
>>893489
Peach are you made from peaches
>>893621
I'm 70% water, but otherwise no..
my shampoo is peach scented though <3
>>893654
>>893654
But peaches contain water too so you must be part peach
>>893681
Everyone contains water so we're all related. Far out.
>>893687
No way
>>893702
Think about it, BRRROOOTTTHHHEEEER.
>>893722
I'm pondering about it
Who would you rather fuck, May or Dawn
>>893779
Dawn ez
>>893779
May, always. Too bad there's no such player here.
Nothing can beat those spats, tits, hair, bandana and overall look May has going on.
Peach, water, Pokegrills, and peaches. Add some whipped cream and you have a party.
>sips fron bottle
>>893857
Where'd you get the whipped cream dude
>>893857
>readies brick
>drops it and shrugs
What are you drinking?
Who would you rather fuck, Palutena or Lucina
>>893870
The blood of my foes
Aw yeah Crash Bandicoot!
Anyone else watching the run here?
>>893885
Girl Marth
wch 2hu wud u fug?
>>893959
Meiling.
>>893870
Cheap brandy left over from New Year's.
>>893866
Never said I had any. Was only suggesting it.
>>893971
WOAH! GORGEOUS TITS DUDETTE!
>>893971
That's China.
>>893906
Don't know about any of the others but I'm not. I can't watch others play. I get really bored really fast.
>>894007
I gotcha where you're coming from anon.
Vriska literally destroyed this thread
>>894017
Thank you for understanding, Miya-chan.
>>894018
Best girls tend to do that
>>894031
Psst. You should go for it.
>>894098
I shed a tear
g'mornin
>>894175
Mornin Konata.~
>>894181
mornin Miya, how's it going?
>>894189
Hehe, watching agdq and enjoying some beer on the side with delicious chocolate.
This Crash Bandicoot runner is smooth.
>>894193
Do you have to be autistic to enjoy a speedrun livestream? Genuinely curious.
>>894200
>>894193
I love Crash... I might check it out a little, even if I don't watch speed runs much...
I have such a bad hangover right now I want to die, how is everyone doing today so far?
At least the Discord is pretty active.
>>894200
Absolutely not. I myself enjoy just seeing glitches, skips and general fast running through of a game in action for all sorts of games. I get to see also lots of games I have never played and probably never will but can appreciate how they look and play out and maybe try out someday.
I like games as art medium a lot myself.
>>894206
Well it's about to end soon!
>>894207
Anzuuuu!!~
Drink up some water.
>>894207
Smoke weed instead. Alcohol is literally poison.
>>894214
How come you can't you play the games yourself? The PSN store for PS3 has a lot of PS1 games if you want to play Crash.
>>894216
DUDE WEED LMAO
>>894224
>>>/b/
Please.
>>894214
Thanks Miya, I've been trying to drink a lot since I heard that helps but I still have a blistering headache, and I have to raid in like two hours which is going to be hell
>>894216
If weed was legal I would senpai, where I was drinkin they were ripping wax from a rig and they offered it to me
>>894228
DUDE
Who
>>894284
no
>>894284
>>894291
Then why do we even bother calling it an ERP thread, anymore?
>>894284
That's a big Nep.
>>894301
Why do you bother waking up every morning?
>>894310
I'm going to stop. Thanks, dick.
>>894327
Please don't, I'm sorry.
>>894310
Can't stay asleep all day.
>>894222
Uhm, I meant games in general. I've played Crash 1-3 plenty in the past, no really interest for those anymore. I also don't own any consoles anymore besides few handhelds.
Though I'd like to get some old consoles, I can't really afford them currently.
>>894229
Aw, well take it easy. I'm sure you're already but even more so.
>Miyafuji hummed while patting your hair softly.
Pain, pain, fly away, make Anzu-chan better again.~
>>894341
>She closed her eyes and relaxed under your gentle touch
Thanks Miya, you're always so nice to me~
>>894341
Miyafuji confirmed caretaker of the threads.
Woo! ERP THREAD!
>>894481
It's dead
>>894481
Dead ERP thread.
*sighs* I'm always late for the fun.
I heard there are some sinners here that needed to be punished
>>894517
I guess my sin would be constantly lusting after angels
>>894517
Maybe. I heard there were so degenerates here who needed to be pleasured.
>>894517
I was born an original sinner. I was born from original sin.
>>894517
Hello there.
Big time sinner here. What sort of punishment are you talking about
>>894541
Pics or it didn't happen.
>>894541
Hayzeus! Por que?
>>894541
Jesus my man, how's it going chilling up there?
>>894529
>>894533
>>894537
Death by blue balls.
>>894531
That's not my job.
>>894361
Anything for a sweetie like you.~
>>894422
H-hardly.
>Miyafuji blushed looking away in embarrassment.
>>894513
Late? No, too early. Hectic hours are to start in uhh.. 6 hours or so.
>>894564
Well that sucks
I'm going with the succubus then
>>894564
But that's my fetish.
Thread is deader than Dojima's wife.
>>894572
>implying even a succubus would mess with someone as worthless as you
>>894582
Gross.
>>894567
"Hectic hours"
Ohoho I'll make sure they're as hectic as they can.
>>894590
I thought angels were supposed to be super sweet and caring..
>>894590
Angel is CUTE
>>894590
Suck off this cockstink
>>894598
Well, I guess we were both disappointed today.
>>894603
Well said.
>>894608
No.
>>894628
Disappointing hours are in session.
Expect little or no acts of lewdness to happen for a while.
>>894583
i would say deader then your sex life~
>she giggles behind her hand
>>894674
JackO coming back just to burn anons.
>>894674
Pretty much.
>>894683
just for a little bit anon, i got work soon, but he needed it~
>>894684
over grown virgin man~
>>894692
First Chie and now you, what's with people throwing the word "virgin" around these days? Fucking brats.
>>894674
SAAAAVAGE
>>894692
Just go fucking roast him.
>>894709
im not a brat, im two months old!
>you feel any semblance of a conscience you have crawl up your back
and your clearly a virgin, its written all over you~
>>894729
>>you feel any semblance of a conscience you have crawl up your back
wut?
>>894729
Two months old? Nope! I'm out.
>>894729
That's actually a really adorable Jack-O image there
>>894743
>>894749
>>894754
i have a habit of being adorable~
>>894796
...what the fuck?
At least when there was no activity the thread died on /b/. Now we're stuck with a carcass sitting here until night.
>>894846
Let's do something fun. Who wants to play Yahtzee?
>>894796
I want to shove my cock up your ass.
>>894891
Sorry anon, im off to work now, im sure someone else's subpar ass will do for a pathetic cock like yours~
>>894846
You don't have to be here
Death.
>>895010
Heal.
>>894880
Come on everyone let's play Yahtzee
>>895061
Guard skill: Distortion.
>>895064
I-Is that me...?
>>895010
Okay...
>>895190
R I P . . .
