I'm designing a new character, and I was wondering if /tg/ wanted in on the fun.
My character is an elderly grandmother, a Favored Soul Sorcerer of Freya. She's 72, and after a long life, she's decided to go on an adventure for her retirement.
One of her qualities? She had a LOT of children and Grand children. And I want some help thinking of them all! So make a vague character and it will undoubtedly be in our gameEven if it is only in those dull moments when she decides to tell stories about how proud she is of her children.
>>43464160
Reference chart. She is a human and all her kids are between 52 and 19.
What I have so far
>Eldest Daughter, 52, Half-Stone Giant. Runs a bandit encampment in the north.
>Eldest Son, 51, Half-Stone Giant. Went to a rich country across the sea and is learning how to be a gourmet chef.
Are you making Jessica Fletcher?
>>43464160
>Youngest Son 22, Pure human , Has a wife and 3 children, Has a farm and 3 extra workers to make more of a crop. A bit dim but a hard worker and built like a rock. Outside one of the big cities. Willing to let party sleep in the barn if ma vouches for them.
>Wife 24 a bit thick but in all the right places, does her fair share of farm work, but children don't raise themselves.
>6 Girl Ask a lot of questions
>4 Girl Prankster
>2 Boy is a messy baby
Is this character really about playing an elderly lady or more about an elderly lady who has lots and lots of stories about her inter-breeding magical realm? Because it sounds like you managed to take an uncommon concept (old age) and twist it into sex anyway.
>>43464569
Oh the Messy baby is new to your character!
So Wife of Bath then, except with more kids.
>>43464575
What the fuck is wrong with you?
>>43464575
No. In fact I planned on making her not want to talk about her various affairs over her life. She's not ashamed, but it's really no one else's business.
She's just very proud of a lot of her children and loves talking about them and their accomplishments.
>>43464912Besides, the GM sort of asked me to help with NPCs, so I'm giving him bait for plot hooks in the form of kids/grandkids
>>43464189
>She was fucking Stone Giants at 20
>Finishes with humans
Shouldn't that be the other way around? I know the vagina's elastic and all but c'mon.
Dongo longo the bango mongo
A homeless half orc bard who sits in the park and peruses its true passion of playing the bongo, despite not having money Dongo longo's truly happy with life
Also its penis is huge
>>43464160
How do step-children work into this OP?
>>43465492
She never got married, but if someone she had a relationship had other children, then she considers them in some way part of her family.
Youngest Daughter: 19
Syndra
Half-Elf Wizard
Acts as an emissary for the human kingdoms to the elf kingdoms and is studying at their colleges of magic. Normally extremely self composed and professional, when her mother or family are mentioned her personality turns into a self conscious teenager. When her mother pops in to check up on her youngest baby she whines that she's an adult and other such things like that.
This thread is a fucking disaster zone of the worst kind.
We have the shittiest player in the world, somehow baiting /tg/'s autistic need to make up random, retarded stories at the drop of a hat.
Why does this shit even exist? Fuck.
>>43465137
You go halfling > elf > human > dwarf > halforc > centaur > halfgiant.
>>43465670
No one has even said anything THAT bad. I think you're over reacting a bit.
You doing ok there, buddy? Need a drink or something?
She needs a man-whore/bard son
>>43465802
Wanna blow a few notes on my flute? I'll teach you the fingerings, no problem.
>>43465819
At the family reunion he's got a new girl on his hip every hour and everyone else gives him shit about him sleeping around and he responds with "What? It's in my blood,"
All you people think about is sex.
It's sad, actually.
>>43464911
There's a table posted with half-giants, fiends, kobolds, etc., and the theme of the character is 'lots of children'.
Literally a character whose past is defined by which monsters she's fucked.
And you're wondering what's wrong with me. Have things just come this far?
>>43466340
Some people have a lot of children. This isn't a thread about how she fucked them. OP just wants us to know about her family. I'm sure she has other qualities beside her family.
Again, chill the fuck out.
Not that guy, but if all you can define your character by is what monsters she's ducked, you might have a problem.
On a more over-arching point, in the world the character resides in, it would be troubling to others to hear the individuals she's fucked described as "monsters." Might come off as insulting at best and a beasiality fetish at worst.
Don't call sapiant creatures "monsters."
>>43466248
>>43466340
>>43466431
It isn't about the sex. She doesn't have sex anymore, she's just old and wants to retire with an adventure.
She has other qualities, and again, she isn't planning on talking about who she's fucked. She'll probably Witch Bolt whoever tries to inquire.
I just thought /tg/ might want to make funny characters for an old lady to wax on about.
>>43466541
Then I hope this thread has been a learning experience for why you can't discuss this with /tg/.
>>43466431
> calling creatures monsters is a bestiality fetish now
Everything here is fucked. Call in the space marines.
>>43466541
You don't need them to all be her kids then. Spread it out a bit, have Her have a handful of kids from 1-2 relationships, and then have it be -them- who had kids across twenty species.
That way it's less "reminiscing broodmother piss-witch" and more the "slightly batty doting grandmother" that you seem to want.
>>43466585
Because prudes and dumbasses will cry magical realm? All he wants is a bunch of random characters, that are at least 1/2 human. How is that difficult? This is basically a character creation thread.
>>43466616
No, calling creatures THAT YOU FUCK monsters is considered beastiality.
>>43466635
>You don't need them to all be her kids then. Spread it out a bit, have Her have a handful of kids from 1-2 relationships, and then have it be -them- who had kids across twenty species.
You'd do the same, come on. You're DEUS VULTing/arcanining all over the place, it's unseemly. You're not interested? Fine, hide the thread, go on your way.
>>43466642
>Because prudes and dumbasses will cry magical realm?
Pretty much. /tg/ isn't mature enough to discuss this rationally.
>All he wants is a bunch of random characters, that are at least 1/2 human.
Then he should do his own work. Don't bring something to /tg/ and complain that they don't do what you want with it.
This is why we can't have nice things anymore. The fun is dead.
This reminds me of an elven sorceress I played with who had tons of kids because of her age.
Though that had more incest than this.
>>43466716
Shitpostong or replying to the wrong person?
I was just putting out an idea for how the concept could be run in a way that wouldn't /trigger/ the autists so bad and give a little plausibility and flexibility to the whole story
>>43466541
Make it so she doesn't ever mention that they're not human then. When they meet one of them, hilarity ensues.
>>43466803
Get rid of the stone giants. It's fine if you want her to have a bunch of mixed race kids, but keep to races that she could plausibly fuck without being ruptured.
And don't call them monsters.
>>43466805
That was the idea. I wasn't even going to mention it, and just keep mentioning stories with different kids just by name or profession, and they get more and more confused as I keep claiming to have more and more kids. Then we meet some, and keep meeting some.
>>43466855
OP has never called them monsters. Where the fuck are you getting that from?
>>43465670
>/tg/'s autistic need to make up random, retarded stories at the drop of a hat.
But that's /tg/'s best quality
OP I'm sorry that retards shit up the thread.
I don't have any suggestions but I thought this was a neat idea.
>>43464160
Half dragon blacksmith, currently a journeyman working on a masterwork to present to the local guild for his mastership
>>43465670
Why are you even on this board?
