TWITTER: twitter.com/planefag
ARCHIVES: https://forums.spacebattles.com/threads/kant-o-celle-quest-a-kantai-collection-game-transcribed-from-4chan.345865/ Yes, I am linking these as the archives now, because this crazy son of a bitch has given irreplaceable hours of his life to compile the quest proper and a ton of write-ups in an easily readable format, and even snipped out the more memorable thread banter. It even has a link to the sup/tg/ archive, so it's all-in-one!
You once heard someone complain that military base sidewalks never exist as the shortest possible route between any two points you might actually want to go to. Much the same could be said for the access roads; and double for the painfully low speed limits combined with very bored and bitter MPs looking for anything to do aside from counting down seconds to their EAS date. At times like these you're reminded why you keep the insubordinate, borderline psycopath son-of-a-bitch Marine around - he has a splendid talent for cutting Gordian's Knot, or in this case, cutting across half the pristine landscaping of Fleet Activities Yokosuka, recently repaired after the air raid. Hate was prescient enough to acquire a jeep, capable of clawing up the rising feet of the big hills that cross the base like they're not there. Hate peels into the parking lot of the main dormitories with a few bushes stuck in the jeep's grille , killing the engine, slamming his heel down on the parking break and leaping from the vehicle before it's stopped moving. He's still a few feet behind you, currently accelerating for the double doors doing your best tripod impression. You catch a brief glimpse of Ooi through the tall slatted windows.
“GANGWAY!” you bellow as you hit the door bar with your forearm and blast through, leading with your shoulder. Ooi leaps back nimbly as Hate thunders in after you. You both come to a screeching halt in the lobby, suddenly cozignant of your lack of knowledge.
“Where is she!?” you demand of Ooi.
“KONGOU! WHERE IS KONGOU!” Hate demands.
From upstairs, you hear a familiar voice sing-songing prettily - “Gooooood mooooorning innnnnterneeeeeet~”
“WE GOTTA MOTOR,” Hate roars, springing up the staircase like spring-heeled jack. You manage to keep up with him somehow, hauling yourself up the bannister hand-over-hand to compensate for your bum leg. Following the light, innocent lilting of Kongou's voice, you manage to find the room - only to crash into Hate's back.
“We're too late,” he hisses. “THE DAMN THING IS ALREADY ON!”
[ ] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
>>46251557
>[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN
There should be a building network closet. Find it, and pull the plug on the switches inside.
GMT+7 REPRESENT
>>46251557
[ ] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
>>46251557
>[ ] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
this is easily, EASILY the worst possible choice we've had for a long time.
So full speed ahead, let's do this shit.
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
You better be going all night fapangel, its a semiholiday weekend
>>46251557
>[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
OY VEY
>>46251557
>[ ] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
>>46251557
>[ ] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
>>46251557
>[x] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN
We don't want to barge into a womans room in front of a running camera.
>>46251557
>[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
Well, more like the whole building. Probably with Hate's axe.
>>46251557
>[x] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
DAIJOUBU HALLLLLLPPPPPPP
>>46251557
>[X] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN.
>>46251557
>[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN.
Cut power to the dorm, NOW! (if desktop)
>>46251557
This can't possibly end well.
Is Essex in there too?
[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
We need to get it shut the fuck down so we can deal with more important shit.
Like saving Tatsuta.
>voting to charge in and make a fool of ourselves in front of the world
STAHP
PLS
STAHP
>>46251557
>[X] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
US NAVY, HERE TO HELP.
>>46251703
>>46251557
[ ] CHARGE IN NOW, EVERY SECOND COUNTS
>Kongou >Pride of Japan
Suuuuuuuure
>>46251703
because it's hilarious.
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
Yeah, this is a situation that needs subtlety, discretion, and tact...
SEND IN SAMMY!!!!
Don't mind me, just lewding some DDs and I'll be on my way.
>>46251557
>[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
Either the breakers for the power, or find the network closet like >>46251597 said.
>captcha says select all street signs
Yes, stop please!
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
In regards to the LAST THREAD, it's time for SETTLE'S BRAIN MEATS to get IDEAS.
Tatsuta thinks she's dead in the water and wants to die, because there's no dock space available, and if there was, she'd be taking it from a better ship, right?
She's forgetting the GIRL part of shipgirl. She doesn't need a drydock, just a space large enough to safely deploy her hull and work on it. Then we can replace her shit, she can fold up her hull, and she can go on sea trials.
So, a plan will follow for this, in the next post, with a backup in case she can't manifest her hull.
...
...Hhhheyyy.
>>46251787
So how was it sweetie?
>>46251787
I heard you had a really good night.
>>46251703
Maybe a strongly worded reprimand from the CNO will make them stop being chucklefucks.
Ah, who am I kidding? Of course they'll choose the most blatantly stupid option just to see things come crashing down.
>>46251802
>>46251557
>[x] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
Lets not go running in just yet, we need more help to deal with this madness.
>>46251841
I see you got an upgrade too.
>>46251783
Maybe one of the few remaining and likely mothballed automobile factories, from Toyota or Mitsubishi?
If it's a Mitsubishi factory, maybe we could strongarm them to get their naval division to provide personnel and equipment.
>>46251841
I'm sure it was.
>>46251557
>[X] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN
FIND THE ROUTER AND DESTROY IT
>>46251787
So have you picked baby names yet?
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
Call in Sammy, she'll probably want some revenge for Samar.
>>46251557
>[x] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
Get her sisters to HALP
>>46251841
You're a good girl Naka.
>>46251557
>[X] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN.
EMPs, find the breakers, find the power cables and blow them up, we have shipgirls, they have cannons, use them!
>>46251557
>[X] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
CODE BLACK CODE BLACK!
>[X] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
>>46251891
...kongou is the one that put sammy down anon, I Dont think tjatll work like you think it will.
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
HURNIT! MUSH!
>>46251557
> [x] HATE, FLASHBANG
>>46251557
>[ ] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
Kongo version of this when?
>>46251783
Tatsuta is missing at least half her boilers, if not all.
She is currently crippled, and wants to die.
Which is why we should, with her permission, use her as the first REAL attempt at refitting a shipgirl. If we fail, she dies anyway, if we succeed, she lives and gets to go on serving without taking away dock time from a "more useful" ship, as she said.
We simply need to get her to manifest her hull in a space large enough to work in, and then we can do the following two things, as a proof of concept:
Item 1: Rebuild Tatsuta's machinery spaces and steam lines with AT LEAST replacement boilers of her original make. The GOAL would be to replace them with at least WW2 vintage Japanese or american boilers that can go between 400-500 PSI. If those won't work, we can always have westinghouse crash-design a new mechanical boiler and make it work. We have Japanese industry to work with, and a large machine shop on base and on board the CVN docked here.
Item 2: AAA refit. Given how long Tatsuta will be laid up ANYWAYS with her rebuild, we may as well investigate the possibility of cross-national refits for her. I suggest we strip all 5 of her twin 25mm guns, and replace them with (ideally) 2 twin 40mm BOFORS and 3 single 3"/50RF mounts, or 5 twin 40mm.
Either donated from american shipgirls, built new, or taken from stockpiles.
From that, we may also need to replace her AA fire director (if any).
This concludes her refit.
AFTER this, we then assign her to the Nakadiv, freeing her up for admin and SIGINT.
She learns her new guns from Sammy/Willie and possibly Essex AND/OR film veterans flown in to be cadre.
This allows her to be useful again, break in her new machinery and train her fairies, and gives a dedicated leader to the misfit/fuckup division.
>>46251917
True, but then she was in Center Force and outnumbered Taffy Three 23 to 13, and if we're talking gunboats, 23 to 7.5 (considering White Plains crippled Chokai). One on one, I'm not so sure.
>>46251917
Are we sure, thought she was one of them they credit to Yamato now?
>>46251970
No that was a CVE, IIRC.
>>46251557
>[ ] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
>>46251557
>[x] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
no reason to rush. japan's anons are on the job, censoring her stream with gigantic walls of scrolling wwwwwwwwww
>>46251954
>Overly autistic analysis to save his shipfu from half baked assumptions
SB get out REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>46251954
Agreed.
The tl;dr version of this is: we improve not only our ship's military capabilities but also improve their quality of life.
Old obsolete ships who are currently "feeling blue" due to being less useful than other ships can get a chance to become useful. Not to mention injured ships like Chuuniboats.
>>46251970
Nah that was Johnston and Hoel. Kongou still has Sammy's number.
>>46251954
I too support these boteslut vivisection experiments.
>>46251954
BACKUP PLAN: In case Tatsuta can't sparkly shipgirl bullshit her hull into place, we'll need a backup plan.
There should be some manner of repair ship on base, ideally, and if that is so, we simply need to at least get boilers delivered so that Tatsuta and said repair girl's fairies can do the intallation, with trustworthy dockworkers and power plant maintainers on hand as SMEEs.
>>46252021
No such creature, I'm afraid. Maybe Settle can anger up USS Medusa or USS Vestal, but that's a long shot.
>>46251954
Reminding her that more AAA is never a bad thing would probably help get her on board with it.
>>46251557
>[X] Call for reinforcements
>>46251954
>>46252007
>>46252010
>>46252021
You lot are a real bunch of special needs sorts, ain't ya?
>>46251841
So you kicked ass, party hard, and scored. So far you are doing better than Hate is fairing so far.
>>46252004
You're just mad no one died anon, put away the murder boner.
If there's any time to try and 'upgrade' a ship more than bolt on off the shelf shit its now.
>>46252050
Not really. This is literally a Pearl Harbor situation.
The ship is hypothetically recoverable and fixable. So why not fix it?
>>46252042
Akashi begs to differ, anon.
Either her, or the converted Asahi.
Posting boat lewds
>>46251841
Elaborate further.
>>46252050
I think this is honestly probably gonna end up being some body-horror shit if it goes forwards.
Which I am entirely okay with. Frankenstein's monster with cute ships sounds interesting.
>>46252086
They've stated that Crab and Wainwright are the one's who work on them. So far as I'm aware, there has been no mentions of repair ships. Considering some of the stuff that's already happened, if they were there, we'd have already gotten a mention of them.
>>46251954
>shipgirl is crippled
>"This is great! Now we can experiment on her!"
I know this isn't exactly what you're getting at here anon, but now is just not the time. Repairs first, then we can see about refits.
>>46251557
>[x] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
>>46252090
gross, don't go posting that guro shit here.
>>46252116
Less Frankenstein, more Robo-cop
>>46252090
That's note lewd, that's gore.
>>46251557
>[x] Call for reinforcements - you really don't want to be all Big and Yankee in the same room as Kongou Dess, Pride of Japan.
HALP
>>46252124
I think the general idea is that so much of her is damaged that we might as well refit her while we repair her.
Like her engine is half gone, so why not just give her a new engine rather than try to fix the old one which is half missing.
>>46252061
God. Fucking. Dammit.
Yes, I've been following the SB thread.
Yes, we all know the lot of you have been talking about upgrading the shipgirls, especially Tatsuya.
Look, we don't know if it'll work, we don't know what we're allowed to do. You're operating under assumption that the GM will just let you bring in whatever fucking toys you want to solve the issue.
This isn't magical christmas land.
We can't just pull out a fix for Tatsuya and "upgrade her".
They aren't tools, they're people. Planefag has been trying to hammer this in for months. You can't treat them as objects to purely "fix" or "upgrade".
If you've fucking noticed, their healing is spiritual and mentally based as well. They aren't going to be fixed or even able to repair unless they themselves believe they have a shot at living.
Fucking. Autists with no sense of context. All of you.
>>46252095
They conducted horizontal docking maneuvers. His torpedo penetrated her citadel repeatedly. She was boarded and seized by the USN.
>>46252124
>shipgirl is crippled
>"This is great! Now we can experiment on her!"
...You know this is how a lot of naval innovation happened, right? And some of the most memorable ships started off as some other hull.
>>46252095
Ceiling.
...Walls, floors, the bed, clothes...
VOTES CALLED
>>46252169
Those ships weren't people anon.
>>46252124
Repairs which can be done at the same time as a refit.
Like, you know, happened regularily to most every ship in WW2 that was damaged?
She needs new boilers, we would not try to fit better ones than her old ones that are extremely low performance compared to any other WW2 boiler?
And with all that work needing to be done, why wouldn't we just add in a topside AAA refit while she's being worked on?
Not just a girl, not just a ship.
She'll understand the logic.
>>46252158
Giving her chance to live to die a warriors death in the future, and not stuck in an ICU, seems like decent way to boost her will to live.
>>46252174
Why must you tease us like this Naka?
>>46252076
There is a biiiig difference between fixing and refitting.
>>46252151
We have no idea what that will do to her. Might make her better, might make her into some sort of Frankenstein's monster. When in doubt, it's best to play things conservative.
>>46252174
Ceiling?
Naka, what kind of bloody lessons did you learn from Iku?!
So our gatcha equivalent has already been provided, down to "Shit, I don't need a Naka, throw it back." And we've got event drops, like Hamp, Perth, and Houston.
I'm looking forward to seeing how scrapping is incentivized, since it seems like a horrible idea under nornal circumstances. What sort of resource could possibly ever merit killing off an irreplaceable and poorly-understood weapon/person?
>>46252218
Then there's also the fear of rejection, like in transplant patients.
>>46252076
>>46252116
>>46252185
Man, the point is that you nerds don't need to be making all these big plans about fixing Tatsuta, because it's just gonna get done.
It's obvious that there are only two outcomes here, Planefag actually kills off Tatsuta, which is unlikely, or she is fixed through...plot.
At any rate, ya'll don't need to bother making your ridiculous plans, because it'll all be handled in one or two votes, at most, without all this making of plans, worrying, winging, and other such nonsense.
>>46252184
But she's still a ship.
And she's military. She knows what's asked of her.
>>46252218
I agree we should be conservative. Doing something like trying to give her a nuke power plant or a railgun is way too much.
But we damn well can make her better than she was when she first was summoned.
>>46252233
>>46251954
>She is currently crippled, and wants to die.
aw diddums.
dope her up, strap her down and intubate.
she can file a complaint when she gets up and walks to the complaints desk.
>>46252124
As long as no one goes and pull a HMS Zubian. That'd just be all kinds of creepy.
>>46252233
>this is the level of retardation planefag has to deal with
I almost feel sorry for him.
>>46252218
Considering that she was already reboilerd once IRL from coal-oil to pure oil fired, it isn't as radical as it sounds.
Her old boilers IIRC only got to around 175-225 PSI, even getting 300-400 PSI instead would be a huge improvement, if not 400-500 PSI.
The topside refit is even easier, since it's just stripping off the surface pedestal mounts for the laughably useless 25mm twins and bolting on BOFORS and/or 3"/50s in their place. The only things that change there are needing to retrain her crew, different ammo to load, and POTENTIALLY needing to fit a new AA fire director.
>>46252174
The fucking kinda magic ship sex ya'll having, damn!
>>46252233
>And we've got event drops, like Hamp, Perth, and Houston.
Bullshit, we still haven't won a boss fight for the map clear drop.
>>46252261
Well, whatever floats your boat, I guess.
Just remember, if you hear high speed screws coming from your inner berthing spaces, call the Wayne.
>>46252233
Did someone say GACHA?
>>46252273
>>46252158
I disagree with the people yaking on about upgrading, but I think that the "not-a-drydock" idea might help her. We can tell her that we can get her in a drydock without needing to mess with other ships currently under repair.
>>46252271
Y'know, where are you guys assuming all these materials will come from?
>>46252261
We're happy you're happy, dear.
Well, you and Harder. Stick together, alright?
>>46252261
Let me guess, there's a few small holes in the dry wall and ceiling; putting those talons to good, if kinky use.
>>46252090
>209 - FRUIT
Th-there was a dedicated fruit room?
>>46251542
Damn, running a bit late today.
I was going to suggest turning Willie D. loose on the power/internet - and then realized we kinda want to avoid burning the base to the ground. Although with Kongou online I'm not sure that's a bad trade off.
>>46252248
That's not an excuse to her life by making a dangerous and experimental procedure even more extreme.
>>46252248
We don't know what that would do, or if it would even work. We don't know anything. I'm saying is that we need to be very, very careful about this and take as few risks as possible.
[X] THEY KNOW. SHUT IT DOWN. (Find some way to kill power or connection to the room.)
>>46252331
scurvy man, its a big deal
>>46252348
Sorry anon, you're too late.You could have stopped it.
>>46252308
>Trace On in a gacha roll
GODDAMIT SHIRO
>>46251542
I wonder, given the rate of progression among the ranks, will the Chiefs of Staff be reading this thread within the next four months?
>>46252321
>>46252323
>>46251557
>Play along for the camera. Time for American damage control
>>46252385
I'm expecting President Obama before June.
>>46252344
She wants to die, we don't have a whole lot to risk, unfortunately.
Really, the biggest risk is that she gets to the point where she want's someone to end it, and we don't do it in time to keep Tenryuu from needing to do it.
>>46252319
There's a war on.
Speficially, a naval war.
A *lot* of shops can't necessarily contribute to that fight, but can do things to produce WW2-era tech.
All we need to do is give the orders and will get done.
>>46252261
This is a naughty Naka
>>46252242
You have NO IDEA how /tg/ quests, do you?
>>46252309
So, the fairies got involved as well?
>>46252396
I don't remember Harder being an M.
Unless living most of his life dodging depth charges has turned him into that.
>>46252042
I'd settle for a floating drydock. There are plenty to choose from.
>>46251924
SAY WORD NIGGA? I CAN GO IN HARD?
>>46252270
>almost
>>46252433
>Marines
>Breach and Flash
I've seen worse instances in Rainbow Six.
>>46251924
I think flashbangs aren't that effective against cameras
>>46252433
Open door right, stack right, short wall right, nine banger.
>>46252445
Some people have no empathy, Deme.
But, you know, it could be worse.
>>46252411
>>46252417
>>46252421
I need to go...like, do pushups or something. Hoo.
>>46252319
Their assholes.
They're believe planefag will just let them magically pull the logistics out of their ass.
Lets see, SB wants to:
>Magically find 5"/38 turrets
>Magically pull the science, materials, research, and production out of nowhere to upgrade Tatsuya's AA directors
>Magically find the WW2 era designs for Japanese boilers and then somehow find a factory to produce them within a week and somehow install them on Tatsuya
>Strip down Essex's guns and from other ship girls, ignoring the political shitstorm that this would be and attach them to Tatsuya
>And then hope all of this works so she can train to rejoin the fleet
>All this so Tatsuya can become the Momboat for Willie, Sammy, and the other DDs
Ignoring the autism required to reach such a plan, we still don't even know if Crab is even capable of pulling this off.
>>46252076
Pearl Harbor is a bit different because it's so shallow the ship's couldn't really sink so there was plenty of time for salvage and repair. The only BBs the USN lost were Oklahoma (which capsized, and then sank on to San Diego for repairs), and Arizona (which exploded). Tatsuta is dying - time is not on our side.
>>46252422
Maybe USS Artisan. 900 or so feet long. Could Handle Iowa class battleships. I wondered in an earlier thread what a floating dry dock would be in a shipgirl world and while some theories were mundane, some were...different.
>>46252413
What the fuck is this, or do I not want to know?
>>46252433
I...uh...yeah...phrasing. Kongou and all.
Just wear Goto's hat, it'll be fine.
>>46252403
You're forgetting that Tatsuta isn't the only shipgirl on base. If we order an experimental procedure to refit her and it fails, shipgirl morale is going to sink through the floor. That's a far bigger risk that just losing a cruiser.
![[muffled Seatbelts playing in the distance].png](https://i.imgur.com/aGrYfHt.png "[muffled Seatbelts playing in the distance].png")
>>46252469
>Tatsuya
This isn't Great Mazinger, bro.
>>46252465
>do pushups
Sure, Naka, 'pushups'. Specifically two-way.
>>46252433
I've played Breach & Clear, it'll go fine if you just spin your way across the room.
>>46252481
Frankly, that's tame compared to the shit i've seen here. Mostly it involved a biological Dyson Sphere.
>>46252473
She's not dying at all. She's just in a shit state and hates being in such a state for long. But she can remain alive in that state for a long time.
>>46252396
You should meet up with Akagi and decide the babies' names together. That should be fun.
>>46252465
Post-coital buzz, huh.
>>46252484
FAST AND NASTY, JUST THE WAY I FUCKIN LIKE IT
>>46252453
Only if you dont throw it hard enough
>>46252512
>biological Dyson Sphere
And I thought all the autists in this thread were bad.
>>46252465
>>46252174
Great. Kongou now has an example to live up to in her pursuit of BURNING LOVE. And she's on the Internet right now! I hope Goto has an asylum request for a non-extradition country filled out and an escape plan ready to go.
>>46252519
Sparkly shipgirl bullshit works both ways.
She may very well be dying to magic bullshit.
>>46252551
>bike
ahahahaha
>>46252502
Worse than her dying slowly or having to be mercy killed?
I doubt it dying during an experimental procedure would be worse for morale than those two options.
>naka gets a stiff dicking
>we did it reddit! we saved her
>and high fives all around
it's like, we're celebrating because we managed to get an alcoholic drunk, and now that they're happy in a puddle of vomit they suddenly aren't dying of hepatitis any more?
c'mon.
>>46252407
Production lines don't magically pop into place, anon. A lot of knowledge was lost, as well.
>>46252469
TatsuTa
C'mon if you're gonna be a complete bitch when complaining about sb get out reeeee at least type correctly.
>>46252551
That's a more appropriate picture for Iku.
You know,village bike?
>>46252538
>>46252543
>>46252581
Look at this man and laugh.
>>46252581
That comparison only works if being in a puddle of vomit convinces her to finally go to the hospital to get checked out.
>>46252469
Nah, the Omaha class would be the Momboats, considering that they were meant to fulfill a similar role to Japanese light cruisers.
>>46252620
Is this a legit MUGEN thing?
>>46252581
Just let them be happy for a while, they still will eventually have to deal with the fallout of Naka going all Blue Steel.
Soooo, I know it will probably be covered later in the writeups and what not, but how's the little "Naka going full abyssal (if in body only)" gonna be dealt with? I'd guess God and the brass in general won't be happy with a potential security hazard, especially after the Shigure affair.
Abyssal Naka's nakas >> Old Naka's nakas, though. Ask Harder.
>>46252583
I know.
But I also know that a LOT of modern naval shit can't be made outside of a few places, so there's likely a LOT of machine shops that aren't being used for naval stuff.
That's where I was suggesting it'll come from, either via Mitsubishi and it's subsidiaries, or America.
A lot of power plants still do coal and oil boilers and steam lines, so they have the workers we might need, as well.
It won't be easy, but a repair and refit of this level would take months anyways, so waiting for parts to be built, while cruel, isn't exactly the worst thing. With today's infrastructure a lot of components can also be manufactured in a decentralized manner and assembled over here, or even on site, potentially cutting production time and speeding along to the installation phase if this plan can even work.
>>46252481
Beautiful quest autism
>>46252657
Nah m8, it's stuff from the DOOM threads on /vr/
>>46252658
>Blue Steel
But why male models?
>>46252450
"AUGH! REYNOLDS, YOU FOOL!"
>>46252586
So, Naka. Bone-white skin, talons. You realize you're now effectively a shipgirl vampire, right?
Something, something, sucking. And Harder.
>>46252672
That is extremely wishful thinking.
>>46252696
Aww, too bad.
Agitated skeleton and Cyberdemon vs Kung Fu Man would've been nice.
>>46252672
>implying the blueprints even exist anymore
>>46252479
Well, I'd guess a really flat stomach and chest and the ability to float on her back would be the most plausible. Perhaps very powerful arms (substituting for cranes). Submerge under the wounded shipgirl and then lift her out of the water lying across the drydock-girl's body. Repair work could then commence without fear of sinking, or the wounded shipgirl could be transported to a shoreside facility like a full drydock.
>>46252739
The girls DO have machinery in shipgirl form, remember? The cranes can be literal cranes. That's how Akashi and Mamiya work.
>>46252535
>about to get Dick'd by the Best
>>46252739
Also inherently lewd - which is a bonus!
>>46252481Rotary SRMs
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mNWybex0u4
>>46252739
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/USS_Artisan_(ABSD-1)
Someone else wondered if she would be an operating table, considering they could not move under their own power.
>>46252780
Speaking of the best Deme. New addition to warchunder
>>46252729
Yeah, I'm aware. Need to watch out for getting a bucket of glitter dumped on me sometime soon.
>>46252776
Certainly. I was just picturing the interesting image of a very ripped shipgirl (both upper body for cranes and lower body for horsepower), but flat chested as can be. Mobile drydock a are frigging weird looking. Especially the semi-submersible variety.
>>46252733
There's consequences for this massive bullshit plan beyond simply fixing a chuuni.
Depending on the outcome of the repairs and refit, it could mean a safe or effective way of refitting any given shipgirl with superior boilers, AAA, or, in some cases for some unfortunate girls, main batteries.
Baby steps, though. Simple boiler replacement and deck mounted AA first.
>>46252817
You're taking all of this in pretty good humor.
>>46252822
>>46252817
Bah, just a little prank between friends, wouldn't it be?
And was Twilight really that popular in Japan?
>>46252816
How does it handle, with their flight model?
>>46252817
Bucket of fuckin glitter, huh?
>>46252860
I'm trying not to think about it. I woke up and didn't want to die for a few minutes. It's kind of nice.
>>46252860
Angst is getting pretty stale desu
“Call Goto!” you hiss sotto-voice, pawing your own smartphone out and tapping Shoukaku's number. The phone rings and rings and rings uselessly as Kongou plows on mercilessly.
“I!” she says dramatically, flinging her hand against her chest. “Am the IJN Kongou, fast battleship built in England, but fighting for Japan!” Then she thrusts her fingers at the computer screen in a V-shape and winks. “ASK ME AAAAAAANYTHING!”
You bat out a hasty text to Shoukaku - then quickly add Akagi, Kaga and a few other random names off the list the IT geeks loaded into your phone when you first landed at Yokosuka. Firing it off into the ether, you realize it is far too little, far too late.
So very, very late.
“What anime?” Kongou wonders aloud, peering at the webcam curiously. “What anime, desu~” she wonders, her face going blank as she searches for an answer she half remembers. She brightens rather suddenly. “Oh, right! BOKU NO PICO!” Big thumbs-up.
>>46252898
I'll tell Jintsuu to go from spiders to spider crabs.
And dog treats.
>>46252576
The difference between 'experimental procedure to save her life' and 'experimental procedure to save her life AND perform another, even more dangerous procedure to increase her armaments"
Blood drains from your face as the room goes all spinny; your body and mind locked against each other in a desperate struggle to keep automatic reflexes from hurling yourself at Kongou in a flying tackle, as if she's standing before an onrushing freight train.
“Goto's coming,” Hate says breathlessly.
“Three sizes!?” She laughs merrily. “FOURTEEN-INCH, SIX INCH AND FIVE INCH!” She flexes her slender arm, resting a hand on her almost nonexistent bicep. “Oh, the queen? She looks nice, but now that everyone's kicked England out of their countries, why do they still have her on their money!?” She plants her fists on her hips and laughs merrily. “TAKE OFF THE TRAINING WHEELS GUYS!”
You lunge for the threshhold, but Hate catches you by your shirtcollar, shaking his head quickly. “He's coming, just-”
Kongou blinks. “What's a sharpie?”
Hate chokes halfway through his sentence.
[ ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
[ ] PULL THE GODDAMNED FIRE ALARM
[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>extra: suggest questions the stream watchers are asking
>>46252895
You were pretty spot on in your descriptions. It turns like a bathtub, shreds everything in-front of it, and dives like an anvil afraid of heights.
>>46252910
>Am the IJN Kongou
The Japanese never used that prefix. It should be "I am the HIJMS Kongou"
>>46252916
>anon_mouths_off_to_an_admiral.png
>>46252910
>Boku no Pico
>>46252937
>[ ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
At this point, quick action is necessary.
>>46252948
Not even that Japan called them by their name and thats it.
Other nations used those prefixes.
>>46252937
>[ ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
I changed my mind.
THIS is the worst idea.
>>46252939
Aha, figures. Now try her handling at lower speeds with your flaps out, and report back!
>>46252937
[x] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
PUT SHOE ON HEAD
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
"Whatcha think of your sisters?"
>>46252937
>Do you play the bongo?
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
Ask her what her favorite tea/scone paring is? Does she make her own scones? Can she offer any tips for setting out a proper tea party?
That should get her going for hours. We can spend all the time in the world coming up with a decent way to fix this.
>>46252937
What are your hobbies?
What are your ambitions?
Who is your waifu?
>>46252937
>[ ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
>>46252937
>[x] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
Might as well try to use it to our advantage.
>>46253006
>she can actually sing the song
>>46253014
you're
>>46252937
>[X] PULL THE GODDAMNED FIRE ALARM
>extra: TURRET ON HEAD
>>46252937
>>extra: suggest questions the stream watchers are asking
Potential creepy-fanboy-questions
Does Haruna really wear dazzle camo panties?
Do you even know what a bra is, Kongou?
(does the general public know about Yams yet?)
>>46252937
Wait what's wrong with sharpies?
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
[X] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
Do you regret what Japan Became from when you were first commissioned to when you fell?
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
Do you cook at all, and if so, what do you like to cook? With a description of how.
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>>46253068
I see we have an innocent among us. Someone, please explain.
>>46252937
>[X] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>question being asked-can you touch your elbows together behind your back?
>question we ask? What kind of tea do you like?
DO NOT PULL THE FIRE ALARM! THIS WILL CAUSE HER TO RUN. BOUNCING ALL THE WAY!
>>46252903
A prescription for afterglow might help with that. At least twice daily. Ask Harder to help with the application.
>>46253068
>>46253084
SHARPIES GO IN POOPERup the butt
How's life like in yokohama?
On average how much do you eat?
How does one ammunition a ship girl?
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>>extra: suggest questions the stream watchers are asking
Sing for us, Kongou!
>>46253084
This is one of those english-language and/or american-centered memes, isn't it.
Surprisingly urban dictionary didn't tell me.
>>46253100
So can anything else so this is not really an answer.
>>46252937
>[X] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>>46252937
[x]Find the stream, and fuck with her
CAN SHIPGIRLS LOVE SHIPGIRLS?
DO YOU THINK LOVE CAN BLOOM, EVEN ON THE BATTLEFIELD?
WHAT DO ABYSSALS TASTE LIKE?
WOULD YOU FUCK AN ABYSSAL?
CAN BOATS GET MARRIED?
>>46252937
>[ ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
BALL, I CAN'T TOUCH HER DOWN SMOOTHLY, GET THE FUCKING EMERGENCY NET UP ALREADY
>>46253084
No way bro, this is too cute
>>46252898
Goddammit, I keep seeing that name and parsing it with no space before the M.
So would the Hatemobile be a Humvee with Fenrir mounted in place of the fifty-cal?
>>46252672
it would honestly be easier to replace a bunch of her /other components with modern of the shelf stuff IE modern Bofors/whatever with the associated wiring than restarting production/trying to get antiques into fighting shape
>>46252903
Well look at it this way, bringing Harder's ass back under fire should probably go a long way to dissuading concerns about your loyalty.
And that's if you sisters, Settle, and Wain's backing isn't already enough.
>>46253068
The "sharpie test" is a jap meme, seeing if you have big eonugh breasts to hold up a sharpie placed directly under one.
>>46252937
>[ ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
>>46252937
>[ ] PULL THE GODDAMNED FIRE ALARM
>>46253048
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRnclastqkA
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
What's the toughest situation you've ever found yourself in?
And the usual creepy weeabooo questions:
Will you marry me?
Are destroyers for lewds?
Are your sisters single.
How big do you like your cocks?
>>46252845
Are you.
At first I thought you guys were just having fun but tonight's proven you're dead serious
Listen. This isn't that kind of story. Please stop. You're trying to force your fantasy into reality, and if you've been paying attention at all, youd have realized your fantasy wouldn't mesh with the story so far.
Chuuni cruisers are fucked. You have to deal with the consequences and accept they'll both be out of action for a very long time. The GM isn't going to let you magically pull shit out of Christmas land to undo the consequences and weight of her actions.
Honestly it's kinda insulting to the chuuni boats since your fantasy cheapens and robs them of their sacrifices.
Fucking. Autistic. SB.
Best way to stop things immediately without making a fool of ourselves in the process.
[X] PULL THE GODDAMNED FIRE ALARM
>>46252937
[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
>>extra: suggest questions the stream watchers are asking
KONGOU! SHOW US YER BONGOUS!!!
>>46253151
Yeah but that's not something to freak out about.
>>46252937
>[ ] PULL THE GODDAMNED FIRE ALARM
GENERAL QUARTERS, GENERAL QUARTERS, ALL HANDS, MAN YOUR BROWNPANTS STATIONS!
>>46252937
How are you not constantly crashing through floors with your weight?
>>46252937
[x ] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
When you get SHARPIE IN POOPER demanded of a ship, it's time to stop.
Plus there's more important shit to do.
QUESTION FROM THE STREAM: Is it cold in Japan, or are you just VERY excited to stream for us, Kongou-chan?
>>46252910
>She brightens rather suddenly. “Oh, right! BOKU NO PICO!” Big thumbs-up.
>>46252937
>[x] COMING IN HOT CLEAR THE DECK
"Hello Kongou, does Goto know you're doing this?"
>>46253176
Stop being so dramatic
>>46252937
>where do carriers get their planes
>>46252937
>[ ] Find the stream, and try to feed her somewhat sane questions.
How old are you? For the daring.
>>46253130
>it would honestly be easier to replace a bunch of her /other components with modern of the shelf stuff IE modern Bofors/whatever with the associated wiring than restarting production/trying to get antiques into fighting shape
Just to point out, this would be the #1 reason to do it. Leveling effect will wipe out any qualitative advantages anyways. Plus, there's other issues, like just getting advanced weapons to work on such an old hull with none of the supporting infrastructure for such things.
I found something on atomicrocket the other day; a commander of a 1945 submarine who's boat and crew were fortuitously cryo-frozen are woken up in the future and asked to go kick some alien ass. He declines the offer of super advanced weapons and just asks for replicas of his own torpedoes, pointing out that something as simple as a lightweight high-power modern torpedo will fuck up everything - his boat was designed to maintain trim when three thousand pounds of torpedo weight suddenly vanished from the bow - fucking with that delicate balance fucks with everything. You can't change one thing without changing another thing.
Also check out my pseudo-CL. I ran into that problem a lot designing this whore.
>>46252937
how do you type with boxing gloves on?
