It's just been announced on the News that half the planet is in the grip of a chaos cult.
Which Chaos God and it's followers would terrify you the most?
>>47923117
Tzeentch
I think nurgle. Just because of the smell and getting some fucked up form of air borne Ultrasupermega-A.I.D.S.
When I think of Slaanesh it makes me think of films like Event Horizon or Crossed (garth ennis only issues).
Being sexually abused/tortured to death sounds fucking horrible.
Whichever one covers vanity and greed.
>>47923224
So, Slaanesh/Tzeentch.
>>47923189
That poor, poor dolphin.
Fuck almost every human character in that trainwreck of a comic though.
probably either slaanesh, because they're all about torment just as much as they are being /d/
or nurgle because you'd die slowly and painfully from mega space AIDS
but you could also turn yourself over to nurgle and survive so win??
>>47923337
I don't think there's any sort of "win" with Chaos.
>>47923345
emperor pls go
>>47923117
Islam
>>47923410
>islam
>not in keeping with the concept of the imperium
replace the emps with muhammed and nothing changes; he's just browner and consumated marriage with a fifteen year old [after marrying her while she was age 12]
>>47923449
>he's just browner
Isn't Emps already brown?
Malal ofc!
>>47923750
He is, I'm pretty sure emps is middle eastern in fact.
>>47923345
Losing is Fun
>>47923902
Squats pls go, haven't you gotten your portion of fun by now?
>>47923750
He's bone white, anon. Literally.
>implying the world isn't a bunch of Khorne worshippers already
Fear is for the weak. My faith in the Emperor would protect me from such evils as I purge this planet and reclaim it in his glory.
>>47924186
Why are you wearing Chaos symbols then?
>>47924186
Holy shit this is magnificent.
>>47924199
>>47923189
>garth ennis only issues
Nah, Slaanesh would be all of Crossed, especially the really stupid parts. Like the uninfected chick somehow ripping off her own hand in Psychopath.
>>47924186
Why isnt that bald eagle pecking his eyes out?
>>47924726
He paid good money not to
>>47923890
He comes from Turkey (Anatolia) during the where he could be either proto-Greek or proto-Persian for all intents and purposes.
Honestly I hate the idea of slaaneshi Demons raping me to death.
>>47924887
If you didn't it would be odd.
>>47924887
Don't worry, you'll learn to love it. Or you'll die first. Either way, problem solved.
>>47924810
So, the middle east? Okay. Why waste all these words?
>>47923117
Slaanesh, most of the other gods would just kill, though admittedly in rather painful ways. Slaanesh though, you'll bee lucky to still be capable of begging for death by the time you actually die
>>47923117
>Khorne
Terrifying, would collapse all civilization in record time as the entire world descends into frothing rage and bloodshed.
>Nurgle
Also terrifying, the entire world becomes a zombie apocalypse movie, but the zombies are intelligent, self-aware, can talk, and can wade through anti-tank rounds.
>Slaanesh
Honestly, the least scary, mostly because at least in the US, we are already there. We worship vanity, expressionism, and excess. Sex, money, and drugs have never been so pervasive, and we have unfiltered access to every corner of the Internet.
>Tzeentch
Terrifying, but in a different way. A 100 year rule of Tzeentch would be filled with unspeakable horrors and constantly living in fear, but nothing really destructive would happen until the mad plans of the world rulers converge on the final few days.
>Malice
Kek.
>>47923117
Nurgle
At least Slaanesh and Tzench can be interesting, but holy shit I can't stand bugs
>>47925419
>implying we're not living the the age of Tzeentch right now
>>47925151
Because the people that live there now and the people that lived there back when the emperor was born are very different people.
>>47925419
Drug use peaked with baby boomers and while it's still rising with demographics where they're prevalent, it has actually been on a steady decline with youth. And the "vanity, expressionism, and excess" is a mainstay of American culture, usually the only times where that ISN'T true is when there's a war going on or a war has recently passed
>>47925510
[citation needed]
Daily reminder that Terra is where Doombreed was born. Chaos cults in Mongolia would summon him through nostalgia fuelled rituals and we would die messily but fairly quickly.
>>47923117
What the fuck am I looking at?
>>47925668
A girl at one of those goth clubs in San Francisco that you think is easy but he has either a fat friend or a really tall skinny guy hanging around her all night that clearly wants your dick more than she does.
We're already being consumed by Slaanesh with people having half a billion sexual identities depending on their mood and the phases of the mooné
>>47923117
Muslims.
>>47925708
This guy knows what he's talking about.
>>47923410
They'd be Khornates, probably.
>>47923879
He's trapped in the Retconnian.
>>47923117
I'd be joining Khorne, so none probably.
>>47923189
...I think we as humanity might stand a chance against him/her/it in combat. Half a planet of Khorne would be a loss for humanity in a week.
Tzeenchians probably.
With Khornates, they're just out to murder you, sucks but simple enough.
Nurglers, just wear a hazmat suit over your hazmat suit over your hazmat suit and top with a set of armour to prevent breaches and you should be okay.
Slaaneshis can be reliably counted on to be too busy with their self indulgences to not bother you too badly unless they have a really good reason, so no worse than New York.
Tazeenchians you never fucking know and everything is mutated beyond comprehension, think that's a freaky tentacle tree-fungus you're having your lunch under? Nah, that's a lost puppy.
>>47924044
Pale as a corpse.
>>47926149
Then why, how can He shine so brightly? Why is He everywhere? Why is he followed by an entire galaxy?How can He always protect?
>>47923117
A combination of Nurgle & Slaanesh.
>>47925965
If a succesful Tzeentchian cult would take over the planet you would only notice when everybody, inluding yourself, is working for them. And then Ahriman comes, takes a trinket he has been looking for for some time and burns everyone or turnes them into nope because no witnesses. So yeah, Tzeentchians are the most fucked up I think.
Followed by Nurgle because dying to super disease has to be painful as fuck, follwed by Slaanesh because no death for you, only extended torment, followed by Khorne as the lesser of four evils, getting your head chopped of is painless after all.
>>47923117
Slaanesh
>>47924186
Did you hear they actually wrote a 40k book about Trump?Every time you turn the page, it goes back to chapter 11.
>>47926279
> Back when Chris-chan looked somewhat reasonably attractive
>>47923117
This follower.
Also, a nurgle/slaanesh fusion, because space aids and how you catch it.
What would a planet under a Tzeentch look like?
>>47926298
Motherfucker, I needed that keyboard
>>47926870
Look around you.
>>47925962
I'm cool with Khorne.
That i can physically hit.
Nurgles burgles on the otherhand. That's some shit i don't ever want to experience.
>>47923189
>Event Horizon or Crossed
Is it enjoyable?
I'm torn between Tzeentch and Slaanesh
The whole "trying every sensation" sits pretty well in my book, countered by the fact that every sane living person would do the same, because chaos sex and pretty demonstraps
Tzeentch would give me what, kick-ass powers and being able to change everything around me ? Pretty gud, but i don't really know the downside of following him, Tzeentch isn't really described well in all i read about chaos godsall according to the plan
The "gifts" of the two others look like a curse to me
tzeench
possibly slaanesh if it's about xirs non sexual aspects but mainly tzeench
>>47927328maybe?
>>47927373
>you will never become a cute slaaneshi demon and fuck another trap senseless as you both fall into warm, loving, oblivion
Why live?
Slaanesh, especially once they get to the point where drugs orgies and gluttonous feasts stop satisfying you. In the chaos fluff books they usually describe what happens to victims of the other gods in detail, but with slaanesh we usually get something along the lines of "too horrible to imagine"
With Khorne you'll likely find an easy death, and with Nurgle you can just give in and he'll take away the pain. Tzeentch could be just as horrifying as slaanesh though it depends what his cultists decide to do. They could melt everyone into the buildings, they could force all 7 billion of us to chant some year long spell that eventually pulls earth into the realm of chaos, the options are as infinite as they are horrible
>>47927719
tzeentch is basically 4chan made god
>>47927373
>Pretty gud, but i don't really know the downside of following him
Tzeentch has so many layers of plans and contingencies that he might as well just be completely fucking capricious. Maybe he gives you neat powers and forbidden knowledge, maybe he makes you work for neat powers and forbidden knowledge, maybe he denies you neat powers and forbidden knowledge, maybe he repos the neat powers.
The thing is, NONE OF IT CAN BE COUNTED ON. You cannot count on Tzeentch to back you up, or even to not screw you over, but you also can't count on him to screw you over or even make you handle your own messes.
The downside of Tzeentch is the same as his upside, and it is uncertainty.
>>47927066
>tfw Jews are just a Tzeenchian cult
>>47927808
>Slaanesh is basically 4chan made god
FIFY
>>47925587
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anatolia#History
>>47927930
>Nurgle is basically anons made god
>>47923117
I would probably join the Slaanesh cult.
Khorne cultist would just brutally murder you, you cannot predict what a cult of Tzeentch would do, so the answer is nurgle.
Slowly rotting to death from sickness is by far the worst way anyone can die.
>>47928037
How does the conclusion that the answer is Nurgle follow from the premise that you can't predict what Tzeentch would do?
>>47927966
Don't see any mention of the people there being different genetically, only of different cultures and being named different things.
>>47928076
>it's not true that the Turks are a relatively recent addition to Anatolia, the Byzantines/Greeks/Hittites/Assyrians etc. didn't leave behind their phenotypes so we can only say the entire culture, governance and language family changed, the people were obviously still the same
>>47928064
Because I am not aware of what is going to happen, it could even be nothing that effects me.I could have even been in the cult without knowing.
>>47928129
[citation needed]
>>47926866
Worst girl.
>>47923117
Malal.
>>47927420
I need a slowed down version.
>>47929460
Ayyyy.
https://youtu.be/o9IN6fZMlGc?t=3m1s
>>47927907
considering how much they get screwed over as well id say that's an apt description
>>47929780
Thanks m8
Zon Kuthon. They don't really have goal that can be negotiated, or a plan that can be disrupted, or a structure that can be broken. They just want to hurt things, a lot.
>>47929780
It bothers me that the graphic designer didn't write "captain's log" correctly.
>>47928037
>I would probably join the Slaanesh cult.
I get the feeling that most people would join Slaanesh, followed by Tzeentch in second then by Khorne in third with Nurgle appealing to the least amount of humans
