>A dragon has flown into town.
>Instead of terrorizing the town, it has decided to instead throw insults and slurs at whoever comes nears the tower.
What does your party do?
>>47171362
Join it
Nothing, dragon might be an asshole, but that doesn't mean I got paid to kill it.
Wait for it to sleep
Convince the city that he is a great tourist attraction.
>>47171362
"Boy! Ah say, boh! Don't you come walkin' down mah street!"
>>47171362
Test my ability to fling insults against that of a dragons.
>>47171362
Bring in the bantz.
>>47171460
This, if you're lucky...you'll get some more.
>>47171547
>An entire group of insult dragons move into town.
>No one can go for more then one block without being insulted or swore at.
>This continues into the night.
>A wife assures her husband to ignore the ancient red dragon looking through the window while calling the man a cuck.
Have we been hired to kill it
If so, do that
If not, do whatever business I came here to do and then leave. Unless he talks shit, in which case we're having dragon soup tonight
>>47171362
Challenge him to an insult-off. Whoever cannot come up with a retort or repeats an insult already stated concedes and leaves the area in peace.
>>47171362
Call up MC Sword n' Board, he'll handle it. Not the first time he'swrecked a dragonout insulted the competition.
>>47171362
Ignore it. I mean, being an asshole isn't exactly grounds to kill someone, esp. when that someone breathes fire.
>>47171460
Correct choice.
>>47171686
He isn't saying no.
Cry as i have very low self esteem
>>47171362
Flyting. Now.
Introduce the dragon to /pol/ and let nature take its course.
Ron Paul & Drabraxis the All-Reaver, 2016.
>>47173830
Hell yeah. I ain't not bitch, not going to back down from a challenge no matter HOW many scales he has.
>>47171362
Engage dragon in rap battle.
>>47171362
Jovially banter back to him if he's being funny about it.
Call him a faggit if he's being a dick
Ignore him if he is trying g to instigate a fight
>>47174600
>I ain't not bitch
So you are saying you ARE a bitch since you used a double negative?
>>47171362
I tell the GM that he is no comedian, and should stick to retarded goblins.
>>47171362
I don't know about the rest of the party, but I'm heading over there so the GM has to come up with ways to shit-talk in a way my character hasn't heard yet.
>>47171362
He clearly had a bad day and only wants a little attention. Pet him and tell him everything is gonna be okay.
>>47171362
"Oi you shit, come down here and say that to muh face, I'll wreck ya good mate, I swear on me mum!"
>I'm a shit talking halfling. It would end either very badly, hilariously, or hilariously bad.
>>47180167
>WTF did you just say you little ankle biter?
>Come down off'a that tower, I' fuck you up!
>I will fucking EAT you, tiny fur-foot
>I'll give you indigestion, you spark spitting newt!
Oh lawdy, the possibilities.
>>47171362
I make a perform (ventriloquism) check.
>>47171362
Well, I mean... that's not much of a menace, is it? Sort of more like a mild public disturbance, assuming it isn't screaming. I suppose it would be a property dispute for whomever owned the tower.
I'm not sure, but it doesn't necessarily seem like it's our concern. Either way, it seems like more of a legal issue than anything that should end in attacking the dragon physically.
>>47171362
I complain about the blatant Monty Python reference.
>>47171362
Insult it back, saying too many nice things about what id do to his mother and then get drunk and play poker with the dragon, and win cuz dragons dont have profession (gambler) ranks and i have. then id join his insults, both of us sitting drunk insulting adventurers and peasents on my tower i fairly won in a thrilling game of luck.
>>47180357
FREEZE!
>>47173037
No means yes and yes means harder
>>47173830
>>47175195
>>47181270
Excellent choice.
>>47171541
Those are some quality bantz you have there.
>>47171767
>heeey seaaath
>you're a bitch
>>47171362
Id call all SJWs I know (I know too much tumblr girls- school sucks) to tell that dragon is offensive and oppressive and luckily he'll be an hero and ill get all the loot of the tower and the exp
>>47182522
>school
underage b&
>>47171547
Ridley got himself a nice tan there.
>>47171362
>"Copper dragon, go home. You're drunk."
Apply shotgun to dragon.
Write "E Z" in his own blood.
SUDDEN ROLE REVERSAL:
>A human wanders into your lair.
>Instead of attacking you, it instead praises, complements, and speaks kindly to you.
What do you do?
>>47171767
>three seconds later , after directly charging into the mid of 3 dragons, our young hero was mercilessly shredded into a red mist. what a dumbass
>>47182669
Have it do my bidding and create a cult after me
>>47171362
The tower is a rook. This amuses me.
>>47171541
Do you have more of these?
>>47183328
>$current_year
>he hadn't played Monkey Island
>>47182651
I know the dragon is fake and in our imagination, but a single shotgun isn't going to kill a dragon. Elephants can get shot in the face with a shotgun, and they still keep going. A dragon is by average larger and more armored (and usually more mobile) than an elephant, so I personally believe you would shoot the dragon, do a little damage, and than get eaten/mauled/burned alive/etc.
>>47171362
I believe I'll invent popcorn and watch it go on.
>You roach-blooded mangy sheep! Idiots! Mammals!!! Bag chested full of fat and no gold! Unarmored BIPEDS!
>>47183377
This unless you get a lucky shot with a slug through the eye and into brain
>>47171629
Too many keks
>>47171445
I love this
>>47171541
based monkey island
>>47171362
Get the dwarf cleric to drop a beat and join the bard in a fire-spitting rap battle
>>47171362
Act gay.
Never fails
>>47183377
This. Unless the dragon is like, dog sized or smaller, a shotgun probably isn't going to do much. And if it IS that small, it's probably young enough that the parents are still keeping an eye on it.
>>47171362
Just start being his hype man, and be so obnoxiously niggeriffic that he leaves in embarrassment.
>>47183681
>tfw the bantz are getting real
I still fucking hate Telltale for fucking up the ToMI.
It's sad that there were no good Monkey Island games after the first three.
>>47183372
>they all rhyme
Good shit right there
>>47171362
Have the greatest roast battle of all time!
>One Bard
>One Dragon
>No mercy
>No respite
>No holding back
>Only the greatest of insults from sea to sea
>Who will win?
>Who will outlast?
>With the Gods above and the Devils below as my witnesses, have at thee!
>May the better churl win!
>>47183848
Or it might wind up encouraging him.
>>47183818
Or the dragons are usually this size and they are no threat anyway, so congratulations, asshole.
