>an ancient evil just wanted to see his friends again
>an ancient evil just wanted to take out the trash
>>47163820
And the trash is your group.
>>47163844
wow rude
>an ancient evil exits sleep mode
>>47163820
>>47163844
>>47165234
This should be in a movie.
>>47165269
That's like 90% of ancient evils
>An ancient evil had an epiphany while in sleep mode.
>When he wakes up he does not reign terror and death across the land, but starts a empire of righteousness.
>>47166493
And this is 5% of ancient evils
>>47166505
And the other five percent?
>An ancient evil has awakened
>his parent in laws are visiting
>>47165234
>Trespassing in ancient tombs
>Wiping out indigenous goblin tribes
>stealing magical relics of tremendous historical significance
Adventuring groups are human waste BBEGs are the janitors of fantasy settings.
>>47166517
no, this is included in the 90%.
turn to page 386 of Ancient Evil Cliiches for the other 10%.
>>47166517
You ever see that screencap about the lich who got trapped in his own lair and went mad from loneliness? That's the other 5%. Liches trapped in caves.
>>47163432
>an ancient evil awakes because neighbor children are too loud.
>>47166524
>And his daughter announces she's pregnant!
>an ancient evil stays in bed watching Netflix
>an ancient evil can't stop posting shit threads on /tg/
>an ancient evi is very depressed and won't get out of his bed to have the final confrontation with the heroes
>>47166994
>the heroes have to motivate him to fight to finish the campaign properly
>>47166994
>>47167030
>not delivering a coup de grace while he's in bed
The heroes have as much brains between them as 2 sacks of potatoes.
>>47163432
based manus
>>47167043
You have no style.
>>47167086
And you have no brains. Between the two of us, I think I'm better off.
>>47167086
>>47167099
Hello Master Blaster.
>>47167099
You have no grace
>>47167162
That anon has a funny face
>An ancient evil is desperately trying to recreate his now diminished fountain of youth.
>>47167278
But he's got no worries.
AND HE DON'T KNOW WHY.
HE DON'T KNOW WHY!
>an ancient evil awakes to stop anon from creating threads about ancient evils
>>47167086
You have no grace
>>47167306
So does that mean the anon is good?
>an ancient evil just wants to sleep he has insomnia
>>47167293
>not recognizing instantly a line from the Monkey Rap
git educated, you underage b& you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npuuTBlEb1U
>>47167766
>not recognizing 80s rock
>expecting people to recognize some dumb rap song from a child's vidya over 80s rock
Degenerate.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Haypxj24_Uw
>An ancient evil gets over it edgy teenage phase and gets into fratboy phase.
party is sent on quest to create the greatest after hangover potion for frat of ancient evils.
>an ancient evil goes shopping for seafood
>untold horrors of the deep are delicacies to his culture
>this is why his people were wiped out and he was sealed away in the first place - every time they wanted lunch, they'd call up a kraken or something even worse
>>47167794
aw damn, I recognize my defeat. To my defense I never listened to Quiet Riot, I was brought up at the sound of Led Zeppelin and Deep Purple and I completely skipped a lot of other bands during my switch to heavy metal and thrash.
>>47167804
>knowingly helping the ancient evils
>ever
Again, as much brains between them as two sacks of potatoes.
>>47167863
Well at least a sack of potatoes has fun. And maybe turns the ancient evil's good. They've been evil for a while, you know, it gets boring.
>>47167876
>And maybe turns the ancient evil's good.
My mistake, as much brains as half a sack of potatoes
>>47167876
Do they become Former Evils if they turn good?
>>47167895
>people can't have a chance of heart nyeeh nyeeh
>>47167942
He's clearly trolling.
>>47167942
As much brains as one large potato.
>>47167863
>being a smitebot
>ever
Quit thinking with your Holy Avenger, anon.
>an ancient evil enters into an underground fighting ring to pay the extortionate costs of running his evil lair
>>47163432
>middle-aged neutrality would like to seek new opportunities
>>47167966
>if you don't help evil people, you're a smitebot
>also helping evil people isn't just a bad idea in general
All the brains of one small potato.
>>47167966
Gygax approved of smitebots, you know.
>>47167942
IS NO MAN OR MACHINE MORE THAN HIS MISTAKES?
>>47167987
>new opportunities
Is that what they're calling it nowadays?
>>47167958
you can't insult me by calling me Irish
>>47168008
All the brains of a single uncooked french fry.
>>47167051
Wasn't Manus just straight up crazy because of too much humanity ?
>>47163432
Send it to hell along with all its friends, that way they can burn together forever.
>The ancient evil was put to sleep
>Cultists try to awaken the ancient evil
>They fail
>Turns out the ancient evil was actually killed
>a youthful good falls asleep
>>47168242
>too much humanity
no such thing
>>47163432
Season 2 never
>>47168008
What can change the nature of a man?
>>47168007
Gygax is dead.
>an ancient evil is awoken by its mother
>she wonders why her child doesn't ever go outside or bring friends over or even talk about their friends
>she worries about her child's future
>she wonders where she might have gone wrong in raising her child
>despite this, she still loves her child and wants to support them as best she can
>an ancient evil goes back to bed because the sheer amount of self-loathing and anxiety is too much to bear
>>47168760
So is George Washington, yet his ideals live on.
>>47168910
Not your blog, fampai.
>>47163432
If I ever get to be a DM, I want to make a BBEG with similar motivations.
Maybe I have too big of a boner for Nox, but it's not like the idea is used all the time.
>an ancient evil is a cute girl
>looks away from the hero and blushes
>"I-I was h-hoping you'd help me take over the world."
>1000 years of darkness
>ancient evil was just trying to make lunch
>its not very good at it
>>47166983
>an asshurt wannabe janitor shitposts
>>47166493
>nobody can tell the difference
>>47167051
>an ancient evil had no friends
>Adventurers hear about the ancient evil awakening
>Along the way, they right wrongs and stop wars
>When they get there, a guy is wearing a nametag, 'Hi, my name is Fred'
>Fred speaks, "Hello, thanks for coming."
>Explains to them his only job is to show up and take the blame for every wrong in the world to inspire heros to make it a better place
>Now that they've shown up, his job to leave and their job is to perpetuate the ancient evil myth, lest the world plunge into true darkness
>OK
>So the cycle continues
>>47169170
>I'm a whipped little bitchboy pedophile who will do anything a pretty little girl tells me to
>>47169170
>ancient evil tries to be tsundere
>fails
>ends up looking dorky any time she tries.
>an ancient evil is woken by it's wife and told to go and fetch their bratty wannabe hero daughter and bring her back before she gets in trouble, again.
>>47163432
Personally, I'd rather the evil be recent and contemporary.
But that's probably because I'd prefer to play in a setting where the world and its mysteries are still young and fresh.
>>47167334
This anon, has a funny face
>>47167794
Your attempts to convince me that something could be better music than the DK rap is ludicrous. DK rap is the song of a generation.
>>47166517
4% turn deranged and die off
1% dedicate themselves just to make annoyances to random people.
Drink just enough milk so the bag has not enough for your mapple syrup cereals.
Unprep the bull when you turn around.
We call those americans
>>47170139
>milk
>bag
Canuck detected
>>47170139
cringe
>>47168726
HARD WORK AND GUTS.
>>47169689
I pity your generation.
>>47169377
Grats, you just invented Zoroastrianism.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Angra_Mainyu
>The "ancient evil" was actually a primitive robot
>It was "asleep" because its battery drained
>>47168726
If there is anything I have learned in my travels across the Planes, it is that many things may change the nature of a man. Whether regret, or love, or revenge or fear - whatever you believe can change the nature of a man, can. I’ve seen belief move cities, make men stave off death, and turn an evil hag's heart half-circle. This entire Fortress has been constructed from belief. Belief damned a woman, whose heart clung to the hope that another loved her when he did not. Once, it made a man seek immortality and achieve it. And it has made a posturing spirit think it is something more than a part of me.also updating journals
>>47167432
So this guy?
>>47169394
You know it.
>An ancient evil just wanted to be a cute girl(boy)
>>47168951
No they don't.
>>47163432
I actually have a planescape campaign written up for later with a BBEG along those lines. All the damage he does, all the destruction he risks, and he does it to undo something and save a friend he can't even fully remember.
>>47163432
>One of my DM's campaigns
>We're deep underground
>In some forgotten lich's tomb that no one's dared to enter for a thousand years, even Drow don't go near it
>Back chamber, there's been nothing
>We find the lich, holy fuck
>He's knelt in front of a gravestone that reads "Emma" and doesn't even acknowledge us
>an ancient evil awakens
>he bathes, brushes his teeth, wears his best tailored made outfit and has a hearty breakfast of innocent souls
>the heroes decked out in weapons and armor of legendary make arrive at his lair on schedule
>they battle, the ancient evil is defeated and he slumbers once more
>an ancient evil awaken once again
>same old routine same ancient life
>the heroes arrive, they fight and the ancient evil is defeated once more and goes back to slumber
>an ancient evil awaken again
>the routine is so imprinted into the very fiber of his being, he doesn't need to think or focus anymore
>he's just carrying through the motion
>the heroes arrive, they battle and once again he is defeated and goes back to slumber
>an ancient evil awakens
>another sleepless night, so he presses the snooze button for five more minutes of blissful unconsciousness
>back to the daily grind
>the heroes arrive, they battle, he is defeated and back he goes to sleep
>ancient evil awakens, and it upset him
>he was having a wonderful dream, where he relaxed on the celestial shores, catching up on the multiverse news as alcohol elementals brought refreshments at his beck and call
>then he remembered he no longer had a digestive tract, nor possessed taste buds, his eyes and nose rotted out a long time ago
>this fact made him sad and burden of his regular duties felt heavier than usual
>the heroes arrive, he took a glancing hit and he feint defeat and back to slumber he goes
>ancient evil awakens, battles, sleeps, awakens, battles, sleeps and awakens, battles, sleeps.
>this is his hell and there is no escape
>A moderately aged neutral is around
>An ancient evil awakens
> When the heroes arrive he starts complaining about how he retired 3 centuries ago, and no, he doesn't care what the damn prophecy said about any moon
>He starts to tell them about how the heroes were like back in HIS day
>3 years later, an ancient evil is touring through the land in his RV
>The heroes are still trying to convince him to fight
>>47168242
He was just referred to as primeval man, and basically that the sorcerers of Oolacille poked him until he woke up and the abyss poured out. So it's much more of a case of, an ancient evil is woken up early and gets cranky.
>>47163432
>all his friends are ancient too
>they just never liked him all that much
>>47167278
Can he handstand when he needs to?
>>47166562
>Satharak, will you take out the garbage already? It's been an entire century!
>I said, I'm on it, Lornadon! I set up a couple traps around the Scepter of Damnation, adventurers will pick it up by week's end. Get off my back!
>>47173523
>fucking qt black girls
I beg to differ
>>47163432
>an erupting volcano signals the awakening of an ancient evil
>it's actually his alarm clock
>"Ugh, five more minutes" he groans and sets it to snooze mode.
>Just when he finds his 'sleeping' groove, heroes show up and wake him up again.
An ancient evil overslept
>>47173880
anon stop
>>47170139
>milk
>bags
That's not America you're in, dear blind sir.
>>47174810
An ancient evil is going to be late for school.
>An ancient evil awakens, but is promptly defeated by a slightly less powerful, less evil, but equally ancient evil teaming up with an ancient good.
>The adventurers were running the entire time because they weren't anywhere near strong enough to take that shit on in a fight.
>Lesser evil takes notice of adventurers, decides to play around with them for a bit.
>Bakes them cookies, gives them gifts, points them in the general direction of enemies that are juuuuust powerful enough for them to feel like they accomplished impressive feats, and did some good.
>Lesser good, meanwhile, acts like a total bitch because she foresaw the evil buddying up with the adventurers.
>Adventurers are confused, but thankful for the chance to do adventurer things.
>But seriously, when did the evil get their measurements, these clothes fit perfectly?
>And how did she know the Mentalist had a nut allergy?
>And why is her cult leader so willing to work with the healer? They're almost total opposites.
>What the fuck is going on?!The answer is "I love messing with my players' heads."
>>47175384
>Lesser good, meanwhile, acts like a total bitch because she foresaw the evil buddying up with the adventurers
>>47175384
>>47175444
This sounds like that Lesser good is going to go yandere or something.
Lesser good is kinda a smitebot, so the party healer stinking of the lesser evil pissed her off bigtime. She backhanded him across a grove of trees in a fit of pique, and threatened the party to not outright serve the lesser evil, or ELSE.
Meanwhile, lesser evil is content to watch them do heroic things, and chat with them, because their antics amuse her. Also, they appreciate the 5000 year old cookie recipes she knows.
Damn, meant >>47175576 to be a response to >>47175444 and kinda an explanation of >>47175384
>>47175460
Lesser good has kinda fucked off to chase down another of the ancient evils that's been screwing around.
But THAT evil is less interested in wrecking everything than he is in teaching his newest disciples the secret of Gitting Gud and acquiring Sick Gains.
>>47163432
>an ancient evil is just trying to get home and cab fair is a bitch.
>>47170139
that was just awful
>>47168242
No he was crazy because Kaath manipulated the Oolacile Sorcerers to dig the pigmy up out of his little hole where he was chilling and making dark soul fragments and then torture the poor bastard until he was broken and became Manus.
>>47168623
This is a thread for 'ancient evil discussion', not 'new parent discussion'.
>>47175384Antonio? Is that you nigger?Stop doing that, your wife asks us uncomfy shit after each session.
> An ancient evil awakes.
> The hero's gather.
> They march to the ancient castle
> Cautiously they enter
> They search high and low, by methods magic and mundane
> There are no traps
> There are no evil minions
> Finally they arrive in the master's chambers
> The ancient evil looks up in surprise as the hero's burst through the door
> The hero's trip over themselves becoming the rare 5x Hero Pile Up
> The ancient evil puts down it's knitting and leans forwards in it's rocking chair
> "Are you dears alright?"
>>47163432
>The ancient evil just wants to go back to sleep
>>47163432
>Be Lich
>Be slumbering for the past 300 years
>the nap was nice and all but it's time I actually do something now
>Oh right, I know, I'm going to see if that Blackguard is still around, he helped me out last time some adventurers decided to come to my lair
>Descend from my mountain, there's a blizzard
>nah, I want a sunny day today
>weather control
>ooh look, a giant mountain goat, looks fluffy and comfy
>I wanna ride it
>Charm animal
>Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
>arrive at bottom of mountain with goat
>realease it from charm, it goes back up the mountain
>ok, time to go to his castle
>Supreme teleport
>At gate
>What the fuck
This castle used to be constantly surrounded by black clouds and ravens and gargoyles
>Now it's flowerbeds and nice things, not that I mind, just not very blackguardish
>Got a bad feeling about this
>Fly up above the gates, alarming guards
>Guards coming to me
>Sleep
>Enter the castle
>Stride into the court room
>What the fuck is going on here? This used to be A pretty great black citadel of evil, now it looks like a fairy tale fantasy castle, what happened the my friend, the Blackguard?
>King looks at me in horror, guards surround me
>Sleep motherfuckers
>King starts talking
Y-y-you see, about ten years ago, a group of adventurers came here and defeated the great eternal black king that resided here, now I rule these lands in peace and prosperity
>My jaw drops, my knees fail me
>My best friend is dead and I wasn't there in his final moments like he was there for me in my time of need
>mfw
>An ancient evil is having a midlife crisis.
>An ancient evil is having a midwife crisis.
>An ancient midwife is having a midlife crisis.
>>47166562
They aren't called murderhobos for nothing, anon.
>>47170139
>americans
>drinking milk
>>47178639
I like you.
>>47167863
Dude, isn't that every Forgotten Realms party that's worked with Elminster?
>>47169689
>Song of a generation
The last fifteen years suddenly make sense to me.
>>47177870
>An ancient evil is a new parent.
>>47178235
I did not expect to like that as much as I did.
>>47178235
I never asked for this
>>47163432
>An ancient oni awakens
>It wants to see her friends again so they can party across the planet just like that one time before they all slept in for a few millennia to shake off the hangover
>The party involves lots of fighting and lots of drinking, and the entire planet is invited
>Because if they don't come to the party, the party will come to them
This is my next campaign premise.
>>47168517
>An ancient evil is put to sleep
>Its owner weeps and strokes its back while the vet preforms the injection.
>ancient evil awakens
>finds cultists have upgraded the lair with modern comforts over the centuries to make the waiting suck less because the latest generation doesn't really care that much
>skips out on time sensitive prophesy to marathon basically every good show that had like a billion seasons with followers
>good guys thwarted by being behind on the show the ancient evil is watching when they reach the lair and leaving so they aren't spoiled
>>47180042
>ancient evil awakens
>his cultists prepared him a netflix subscription
>An ancient evil awakens
>In the body of a human, he slowly regains his memories of past lives
>He remembers millennia of history, and he hates what he knows will happen next
>His body gradualy changes, bones break, tendons tear and reform
>Painfully, the appearance of his first life returns to him
>He wishes to lift the curse he cast upon himself in his youth, but he can't
>Nobdy can
>As he stands in the blood of the kin of the human whose body he stole this time, he resigns
>He knows what he must do
>To find peace, to break the cycle of reincarnation there is only one way
>He can not ressurect into another body if there is none left
>He does not resent them, he feels no hatred nor joy
>His quest of extinction begins anew
>Likewise, another hero's quest to stop him begins anew
>>47181601
>guys no you don't get it
>i need to kill you all so i can die already
>>47181601
>An ancient evil awakens
>For the septillionth time
>His power is immortal and timeless
>Once slain, he returns to the cycle of the universe again
>Countless histories and endless timelines are his past
>No matter what he does, empires fall, noble men die, and every living being suffers
>In his sorrow, he seeks to liberate all of existence from the horror of this reality
>And in a great new darkness, he begins to enact a very special plan
>No more worlds like these
>No more days like that
>an ancient evil has one day left until retirement
>>47179942
Japanese goburin!
>>47163432
>an ancient evil awakes
>walks to the door and says no,he is not a member of the church of latter day saints
> and politely asks them to leave
>>47168242
He was mad because he lost his precious
Which princess Dusk had half of, and the chosen undead the other half
Which is why he kidnaps Dusk and drags you back in time
He was just upset because he rude assholes woke him up from his nap and people took his things
>an apocalyptically large primordial being awakens, scared and confused
>An ancient evil awakens
>He looks on in horror, his garden is dead
>The heroes find him planting new petunias
>The heroes are recruited to help replant his garden
>It's been three centuries, the heroes just want to go home
>>47179409
>A PC is the new parent of an ancient evil
>>47175368
kek
>Ancient evil is really just an old emperor given immortality.
>He's been trapped in that cave for three hundred years and would have gone insane were it not for the constructs and second-largest library in history keeping him company.
>History was written by the winners, so his normal empirical activities were thrown in the most evil light possible with lies painted over all of his good deeds.
>He just wants to leave the goddam cave and get some food that's not nutritious brown mush.
>An ancient evil awakens
>the chicago cubs still have not won a world series
>>47183320
Kek
>>47163432
He'll meet them all...in the afterlife.
>>47166493
>>47166505
>>47163432
>an ancient evil needs new hobbies.
>>47163432
>an ancient evil wants to leave the past behind
>>47166493
#notAllAncientEvils
>>47163432
>>47185786
>An ancient evilfound a reason to stop being evil and do something good for once
>>47183033
I'd go and help him in making a new empire.
#EmpiresAreGood and #KingdomsAreStupid
>>47163432
He sent his only friend into the far future so he wouldn't be alone when he got old
>>47185918
>an overzealous hero has tracked down an ancient evil
>>47187193
>The ancient evil was executed, yet its only friend never left it even in death
>The overzealous hero then asked himself if his quest was even right
>>47177920
No antonio here, anon. But am running Anima, so 50% relevant? Because Spanish-made RPG?
>Ancient evil awakens
>FOR FOURTEEN HOURS HAVE I SLUMBERED IN THIS PLACE
>DELIVER UNTO ME A SACRIFICE OF BACON AND WAFFLES, AND YOU SHALL HAVE POWER BEYOND YOUR WILDEST DREAMS
>An ancient evil is awoken
>Turns out the ancient evil is actually just a normal kind of guy with big ideas about making the world a better place
>The people that sealed him thousands of years ago were afraid of change and kind of jerks.
>>47173880
This is the plot of Cucumber Quest
>An ancient evil challenges the party of heroes to a steel death cage match
>>47185918
>An ancient evil decides to turn over a new leaf after being sealed away for thousands of years
>>47174240
The heros go with him like the movie with Hitler "He's back" or whatever
>>47181601
>not trying to make <insert world name here> great again
Pleb tier ancient evil.
>>47174498
No, but he can dance if he wants to, and leave his friends behind.
>>47163432
>An ancient good has seen all of its friends die, and decides to turn over a new leaf.
>an ancient evil just wants to get laid
>>47194901
>An ancient evil starts a new life wanting to genuinely change
>Forces itself to refrain from doing nasty things
>Old habits die hard as the local bunch of heroes go full douchebag on the people
>>47199525
>The ancient evil just wants to have a family...
Slightly off topic but why are the ancient evils always more powerful than the present day evils? Do they just not make evil like they used too?
>>47199602
That plus ancient evils cultivated their powers while asleep in the dream world + they often have some unique skills, loads of experience and some are very open-minded for new stuff (the ones who have the latter are the most dangerous since the natural curiosity and eagerness to learn and try out new stuff makes the ancient evil a force to be reckoned).
>>47179942
HIGH TENSION
>an ancient evil smites the cultists trying to awaken him and asks for 5 more aeons
>>47199525
>an ancient evil just wants to get laid
What do you think he wanted all those virgins for?
>>47166517
Magic realm
>>47177755
>>47170692
'mericucks spotted!!
>>47200402
>What do you mean you sacrificed the virgins!?
>Good help is so hard to find these days
>>47201317
Congratulations, you found Americans on an American imageboard.
>>47163432
Wait, is that a spoiler? Ive only seen the show.
>>47201500
No, it's just Ainz's inner thoughts.They translated the story of Nazarick's founding, with Momonga working with his friends to conquer it. It's melancholy as fuck.
>>47163432
>Ancient evil is done with his business
>all this destruction was him just taking out the trash
>the trash is your world
>An ancient evil challenges the party of heroes to a game of their choosing
>Uses the time to convince them to join the other side
>>47178235
Well?
What are you waiting for?
Kill the heroes, harvest their souls; sell them to the demon that hold the Blackguard and make a trade.
You get your buddy back they they're fucking dead.
>an ancient evil has grown bored of its eternal empire and secretly welcomes the heroes' attempt to destroy it
>>47203408
>Ancient evil finally free from his evil responsibilities
>opens an evil bakery and settles down
>>47203682
>an evil bakery
And ironically its evil products are very popular and sell out really fast.
>>47203682
>a good aligned bakery opens next door
>>47163432
Overlord?
