You know the drill /TG/; Post elves, discuss elves, shitpost elves and tell why ya'll love and or hate 'em
Also would thou approve of a scenario presented in pic; human just having friendly chats with a wood elf?
>>47106290
Two questions:
1. What the fuck kind of uniform or armor is that soldier wearing
2. Is that human gonna consider making love with that wood elf? Hope not because you know? Total Yanderes who're extremely clingy to their lovers and never want them to leave their forests ever again.
>>47106290
I actually kind of like elves. They're a nice way to add something mystical, which I think a lot of people forget about in settings. They can be friendly, they can be wild.
Also, yes. That scene is totally fine, and cute, and I'm glad to see humans and elves living in peace.
>elves
FUCK YOU! DEUS VULT!!! I SHALL SLAY THE HERESY!
>>47107633
Are you supposed to be Pelinal or a human in 40k?
>>47107633
>>47107657
That Templar must have a suicidal deathwish becuase one; he's charging towards a Wood Elf who're well known as EXPERT ARCHERS AND MARKSMEN. Two that human soldier the Wood Elf's chatting up with, looks like one of those more technologically advanced humans in the lands of the west. AND he most likely has one of those "firearms" or "guns" and just shoot the Temps.
>>47106898
Your head canon is cliche and boring.
>>47107850
>>47107866
I wonder if the inside of an elfs butt is silky smooth or raw and soggy like a cut of fresh meat
>>47107888
>>47107927
>>47107952
>>47107968
>>47107995
>>47108006
>>47106290
What do you think that wood elf and that human soldier are talking and laughing about?
>>47108985
Maybe something extra heretical, like them having kids?
>>47108985
Probably laughing over some misconceptions about each other's races, and maybe being surprised to find common threads in their life stories - similar friends, nostalgic moments, stuff like that. Or maybe they're literally cracking jokes.
Why?
>>47109386
Because I'am all put of gay grox porn and now I want elf cheesecake!
So should I expect more shit from a certain elf-wank anon who loves putting in "low born human getting lucky with a kind and generous elf waifu?"
And or must I endure more "sad and lonely imperial guradsman being uplifted and happy thanks to making love with qt eldar waifu?"
What're you're thoughts and conditions in making love with a male elf such as the one presented in the pic?
>>47110214
I'm straight.
>>47110407
Assuming if one is a woman or if thou were a gay dude, what are the conditions and preferences for screwing with elf men?
>>47108985
Dick jokes.
Dick jokes transcend everything.
>>47108985
>>47109198
>Human Soldier: "So what's the deal with the whole 'Knife-Ears' thing? The boys back at Firebase Delphine; where I work at, seem to also copy that term."
>Wood Elf: "Oh, probably by the fact that we elves have our pointed ears."
>Human Soldier: "Are you fuckin' serious? Ahahaha, 'Cause of the ears? And I thought it was something metaphoric, but its just a dumb and cheap insult that'd barely cut any deep wounds? Psh, It's same as some high school jock who calls a kid wearing a polo and thick-rimmed glasses a nerd. And really are your ears really THAT sensitive to make you orgasm? Not that I wana try though!"
Wood Elves: "It's just different 'biology', 'Spoon-Ear' and I ain't gonna bore either of us to death."
Human Soldier: "EGADS, 'HOW DARE THEE CALL THY HUMAN BODILY PARTS IN SUCH A DEROGATORY PHRASE, I SHALL HAVE YOU PUNISHED FOR HERESY. DEUS VULT.'"
Wood Elf: "'OH NO PLEASE DO NOT PUNISH ME OH-SO-HANDSOME-HUMAN. PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR SUCH HEATHENISM. I SWEAR I'LL LET YOU SLURP ON MY EARS.'"
Human Soldier: "'LET ME NIBBLE ON THY EAR LOBES YOU SAY? VERY WELL THEN... DEUS VULT!!!'"
>*both laugh heartily*
Guys I want to have sex with Elves.
It's important.
>>47110424
Seeing as I'm neither...
Not being Drizzt?
Or just be one of these guys. Dat Skyrim and Morrowind voice...
>>47109825
I can't tell if you're OP samefagging and are that aforementioned elfwank anon or someone else with a repetitive complaint style that reads way too much alike. Either way stop it. It's bad.
>>47110424
Dude you are asking me to pretend I am of an entirely different sexuality and somehow figure out how I should develop instant ideas of how I'd feel about an entirely different race of the same gender as me, despite what I'm imagining.
I don't know, okay? Can you honestly explain why your favorite color is what it is, or the gut feelings you get about people?
>>47110455
take your pick
>>47110446
>>47110505
Better selection.
>>47110505
>>47110517
Yes.
Give me all of them.Except the cannibals, they're cute but that's just creepy.
>>47110532
So do the Bosmer of Elder Scrolls tend to be Yandere too?
>>47110214
>>47110407
>>47110424
>>47110466
>>47110483
How about this, I shall answer the questions as easy as I can:
Male elves are so girlish and can be soooooo bishy that having gay butt-sex with them is hardly considered gay. So straight male sucking cock of pretty faced elf guy? Not gay, though really degrading for a male human and would shatter your dignity, still not gay nor homosexual 'cause of how bishy and girly male elves are.
>>47110589
So basically, "would you fuck this?"
And the answer is:
Maybe.
>>47110542
Not particularly. They'd probably get mad because you munched on an apple or something.
>>47110589
I'll stick with females, thanks. A lot simpler and overall cuter as far as I'm concerned, and I don't have to go to great lengths to like them or explain why I do.
>>47110662
>a pretty woman wearing a masculine business suit
>a pretty elf woman wearing human business/corporate clothing
YEEESSS, This is one of my fetishes.THIS MAKES ME MOIST
>>47110542
Not really.
Crazy and/or insane? Yeah.
If you read any of the books in the games, you'll find that they (along with everyone else) all have their own insanities.
>>47110741
It is indeed the best art. I mean, look at her! She's even smoking a pipe! So professional!
Pity I have little else like that, and nothing near as cute.
>>47110776
There needs to be more of modern fantasy elvesin suits
>>47110805
>she'll never call your nameover the intercom to remind you to get cracking on the Henderson report
I hope this is relevant to the thread for elves...
>>47110517
>>47110662
>>47110758
>>47110776
>>47110835
>>47110875
>>47110855
>more elf pics
Thanks guys, I can add more of these elf pics to my flashdrive and folder containing many images I can use for posting and shitposting.
>>47110855
Space elf is still an elf.
>>47110891
I care about you and hope that you do well in life.
>>47110903
I'll be honest, that animated ear twitch scared me and made me spit my drink at my lap. That was really unexpected and all.
>>47110855
I love this guys art but his girls look so unhardened by war even with scars. It's very dissonant like you know that Deldar in his one pic will torture you to death but she looks so inviting and there's no malice on her face.
>>47110933
It's cause they're space elves.
But what abouttomboy elves?
>>47110979
Yes.
>>47110957
But his SoB pics have the same issue.
>>47110933
>his girls look so unhardened by war even with scars
Eldar, are such floozy-frilly-flowery scented-pantied-milksops, they don't get to bear the actual markings of war.
>It's very dissonant like you know that Deldar in his one pic will torture you to death but she looks so inviting and there's no malice on her face
...Actualy I think thats a neat strategy a DEldar could use to easily lure in horny human virgins she can rape and torture later... Seriously though wanting to fuck eldar and tau is totally fine. But the Dark Eldar? No way! They're edgy assholes who only care about looking like drug addicted psychopaths and escaped asylum patients, and I'll quote from one anon: "They probably even subtly, or unsubtly rape prepubescent teenagers ever sixty-nine days."
>>47110741
Have you considered Shadowrun?
>>47110995
It's the emprah's gift. They're the Daughters of the Emperor now, right? Well, he wants grandkids.
That, and their faces probably harden when they set shit on fire.
>>47110911
thanks senpai... So anyone of you curious to see how my folder full of images used for posting look like???
>>47111088
yes
>>47111088
No, mine is bigger anyway.
>>47111088
Not really, but start posting, dubs.
>>47111094
OKAY then here it is.
1/9
>>47111086
With every post, it gets harder and harder not to tap into my elf pictures with the word "slut" in the name.
>>47111185
nigger please start posting the pictures not the screenshot of your elf folder please and thank you
>>47110957
>the filename
If that elf is a guy, I sure he'd still easily get alot of young women (and older ones especially MILFS) falling head over heels for him and beg him to take their virginities.
>>47111145
>>47111185
Heh lol, different anon here and some of those pics I also have in a folder of my own.
But as >>47111194 stated ya dont need to make things harder for yourself dude. Just go back to shitposting and post pics instead of this.
>>47111200
Even the other elves?
>>47111200
>Fathers! Lock your daughters up!
>And your wifes too!
>There is a roving boy band of hot elf guys
Hey guys not sure if this is the appropriate type of thread to discuss about this. But apparently LCB is now continuing as I saw yesterday, the thread about it got archived so find it yourselves.
Also gonna post that stupid pic of no. 52.6 and Taldeer as Nate and Nora from FO4. And someone apparently posted and rebloged it in tumblr too...
>>47111245
>Roving boy bad of hot elf guys
I kek'd.
>Visage of elf dad
>>47106290
>Human:"Yeah, it's hilarious watching some of the boys back at base fidget around you elves. High Command has been sending agents to make sure everyone acting nice and proper so we don't have any 'incidents', and your comrades that are stationed on base have been taking advantage of that."
Elf:"Hehehe, I can only imagine! You humans are so cute when you blush."
Human:"Funny, I'd say the same thing about elves."
>>47111315
See
>>47110506This is my fetish if you haven't realized it
Recently I've been thinking of starting a campaign with elves versus everyone else. The players would be part of the everyone else. Not sure what system but probably not D&D.
The basic deal is that they were like Tolkien elves, except maybe even more so, and there were never Atlantean/Numenorean style humans that fell from grace to provide some idea of past balance.
And then something happens, nobody knows what. But it was pretty bad and had repercussions all over.
I'm thinking it might be something like humans starting tapping into Things Man Was Not Meant To Know, and lured close something horrible. The creator deity (for whom the elves are His Mary Sue race) goes to tell it to fuck off and gets curb stomped.
The players wouldn't know until maybe later.
Anyways, they feel the pain of their creator's getting his shit pushed in, and it basically drives them all crazy. He was like, part of how their selves were balanced and interwoven with reality or something. Their souls feel discord for the first time in history, and so with no practice at imposing chill on themselves, or impulse control or anything like that, so they decide the only thing to do is start sharing some pain across the continent. There may be fewer elves than humans (plus whatever), but not that many fewer, and one crazy elf can expect to slaughter 20 soldiers like they weren't even trying, it's a problem.
What do you think?
>>47110662
>buying into fucking ESO like its actual elder scrolls canon
They'd probably be pissed you didn't eat the apple assuming it was offered. Turning down food is just rude.
>>47111255
I saw that. Is the writer any good, tho? LCB is cheesy as fuck and it only stood up on its own two feet because the majestic prose of the blessed anon who originally whiped it up.
>>47111336
Deedlit is a cute
>>47111361
How can I romance my elves if they're trippin' murderin' hos?
>>47111361
Sounds like a cool origin story as to how these elves become all spooky Fair Folk and Discworld-like (I recommend reading Lords and Ladies if you haven't.) Maybe they fuck off to their own realm (the site of the final battle or something) and it's also spooky and fairylike.
I want an elf to spank me.
>>47111177
>slut
What about elven men? What word would you tag them with? Grumpy Old Men? DILFs? Sugar Daddies? Bishies? Twinks? Pretty Boys?
>>47111255
Anatomically a female Eldar is about 1 foot taller than a human male. What would really make more sense is if he was inhaling her giantess amazonian queef.
>>47111415
Cunt hunters?
Probably bishies. Since I just use slut for when the lady elf is dressed in highly impractical armor.
>Or they're dressed like Drow.
>>47111431
I don't think her queefs could be inhaled with a 1 foot difference. It's a Fallout 4 reference anyway, though I'm sure the artist just didn't know eldar were tall.
>>47110998
>A Dark Eldar driving a Chester-the-molester van
"YAARR! Avast there lil' monkeigh kiddy landlubbers. You wonts some free candy? I gots candy and booty in me van. And you can tell yar teenage babysitter to come too, I gots vidya games and them boyband CDs in me van aswell!"
>>47108040
>Poke
"Nmmgh."
>Poke poke
H:"Excuse me, miss?"
"Nggh."
>Cold hand under robes
"EEEEEEKK! I'm awake I'm awake Revered Mentor, no more sp-..."
H:"G'evening Miss. I'm no mentor I'm afraid, just a farmer."
"Uuuuhhh. Right. Where am I?"
H, in a joking manner:"Well, yer on earth, in the good ol' US of A, in'a backwoods of Meth Virginia, I mean west."
"Earth? Oh no, I REALLY fucked that spell up. I can't even get a simple retrieval spell right!"
>Breaks down into blubbery and tears
H, surprised:"Whoa, whoa there, it'll be alright Miss, no need for tears, c'mon on now!"
>Wraps arm around Elf, eliciting a squeak and a blush.
>>47111492
You do realize the elf at >>>>47108040 is a male/boy elf, right?
>>47111393
Damn son, I want to run my tongue over those pecs while he's channeling lightning.
>>47111492
That's a male elf
>>47111509
Yes, I do! Elf's too out of it/distracted to correct him, and he's too much of a good ole country bumpkin to tell the difference between Elf sexes.
>>47111492
Oh, anon...
>>47111255
For real? Just checked the archive, couldn't find anything about Love Can Bloom redux.
>>47111393
Option A: you ever see those romance movies where the middle aged and overworked woman finds out she just needs a man in her life and everything somehow magically calms down then the next 2 hours are how the guys dick solved all her problems? Do that.
Option B(the fun option): murder, pillage, and rape right alongside your waifu. What kind of egotistical fuckstick not only enters a relationship knowing theres overt traits they openly dislike but also enters with the intent to change that person on a fundamental level to better please you?
Got any other life shattering choices you need made for you?
>>47111255
This makes me wanna request Fallout 4 companions drawn as Warhammer 40K beings.
..And which companion would LIVVI/Taldeer romance with?Not Curie hopefuly since she'd a synth made from the DNA of their daughter
>>47111531
>>47111513
People, people, I know my male cock sleeves from my female cock sleeves!
>>47111539
Whoa. Anon, Calm Thine Tits. He was making a joke.
>>47111539
So give her the D?
>>47111415
The correct terminology is Slut. When refering to an elf you are refering to a slut.
When hailing an elf it is okay to just shout "hey Slut!" Then point out which elf you were refering to when all the elved in the room turn their heads.
If you have just met an elf and don't know their name or have forgotten their name for some reason it is acceptable, and consider polite so as not to offend by letting it be known you forgot their name, to refer to them by their nickname, Slut.
>>47111431
So its normal to expect Eldar women to have big ol' titties? Okay then.
*cough*ID*cough*DRA*cough*NEL*cough*
>>47106898
Armor looks like pic related without the cape
>>47111556
Give anyone the D, anon. Thats the point of pillaging and raping. Look even she's giving people the D. Just don't ask who she took it from.
>>47111557
Gunslut!
>>47111592
Slut mage!
>>47111569
Best dressed group of badasses this side of the galaxy. Bugs, cybos, and xeno's beware.
>>47111597
Red slut!
>>47111556
The D, you say?They're immortal monsters, that's almost like vampires
>>47111599
Sounds like elves need some MANAGED DEMOCRACY and some LIBER-TEA
>>47111255
>A Tau Water Caste representative voiced by Paul Eiding knocks on their front door
"GOOD MORNING, May I interest you in our Greater Good-Apocalyptic shelters that are in no way a secret social experiment? This is to prepare you for DAH future!"
>>47111603
SLUUUUUUTS
>>47111614
Muh dick.
Is that like a sword whip or just a regular whip? Looks more like a ribbon that would sting but won't hurt much.
>>47106898
>>47111569
Actually the image OP used is from a Drawthread request >>47060173 and the image used for reference for the human's gear was this >>47058183
So yeah the armor is basically some heavy duty anti-ballistic military armor pieces that would be worn by spec-ops.
>>47111569
improved version of pic
>>47111642
Fuck if I know.
I'm just going to post the sexy elves now.
>>47111670
>not beach slut elf.jpg
>>47111678
I started using slut when I couldn't think up of better names.
>>47106290
>>47110446
>>47110506
>>47111315
>All this constant GuardscumxEldar waifuisms
>>47111695
Just another way for man to triumph over the xenos.
>>47111655
>>47110542
>i am ok with this
>>47111695
>>47111714
>You'll never-ever have a qt eldar GF/waifu
>your face when an hot eldar woman goes with a shy and socially awkward human guy rather than the old and bitter you.
>>47110855
>>47110903
Thank you neglectful ancient space frog people for not messing around too much with the space elves so that we fa/tg/uys ca have something to fap too, and those lonely IG's can have waifus who'll wisk 'em away to their homeworld(s)
>>47111695
Wut? It's two soldiers chatting and flirting, none of that retarded Fem-dumb superior female bullshit.
>>47111775
>>47111794
Space elves!
>>47111800
That's a dragon Spec-Op slut, not a paladin.
>>47106898
>Total Yanderes who're extremely clingy to their lovers and never want them to leave their forests ever again.
Fuck off.
>>47111809
Still a slut!
>>47110589
Fuck off.
>>47106290
If that human with the armor and gear chatting with the elf is a soldier, where's his standard issue firearm? No soldier should be without his/her gun, same with that elf with no visible weapon. What if hostile forces come up?
>>47111829
Wrist lasers and magic.
>Guise, I need a name for this one
One of my characters raided the underdark regularly for male drow to add to his harem. He liked them because in addition to being pretty dark elf boys, they were naturally submissive.
>>47111775
>laughing elf WHORES
y u know rename it as laughing elf SLUTS?
>>47111655
>>47111728
"MAKE SUPER-EARTH EVEN GREATER!"
>>47111255
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNXzjB6MEb0
>Taldeer/LIVVI: *tears streaming down* "Please Lofn, its me; your mother/father, just please open this door and let me come to you!"
>Synth Lofn: "I DO NOT KNOW YOU! GET AWAY FROM ME! MOTHER! MOTHER, HELP ME!!!"
>and then a weary looking woman who has the features of an eldar and a human (who is actually the real Lofn walks in
>then a Tyranid Ripper which seems to be the woman's pet also comes in
>Mother: "Unyuufex, stand down boy. It's OK I've got this."
>the half human and half eldar looking woman then faces Lofn
>Mother: "Lofn. AN-94, recall code: Sigma."
>synth Lofn shuts down and the woman faces Taldeer/LIVVI
>Mother: "Fascinating... But disappointing. The child's responses were not at all what I anticipated. She is a prototype, you understand. We are just now beginning to explore the effects of extreme emotional stimuli. Please try and keep an open mind. I recognize that you are emotional and that your journey here has been fraught with challenges. Let's start anew. I am Mother. Welcome to The Institute."
>>47111255
>>47111904
How sad. But is it wrong of me to wish it'd be Taldeer who'll be the main player character or the "Sole Survivor" and not LIVVI? Because all that emotional dialogue in trying to find their kidnapped child seems to work well with an emotional Taldeer, especially when confronting Kellogg, the evil bald man who dresses like Mad Max.
>Taldeer: "I'm going to kill you! I'm going to make it as painful as imaginable! So much that you'd be hoping I do not use my powers to turn you inside out you mercenary son-of-a-bitch!!!"
Is this the new /wst/? Didn't they ban you guys?
>>47111982
>new
Elf posting is older than the board you dumbshit.
>>47111982
It's older than ERP and /wst/
>>47111982
You don't even know what /wst/ was, do you?
>>47111982
>Is this the new /wst/?
Is this a new meme where you parrot this every time? /wst/ was for OC.
>>47111815
Found the Bosmer.
Just how many Mer posters do we have in here? Show of hands?
*raises hand*
>>47112306
>*raises hand*
*actions* is misconduct on imageboards. Don't do that. Site staff has gotten banned for this on /a/. It's fine for a story (kind of lame to resort to that) but anything past that is Gaia tier.
>>47112345
Way to be triggered. *actions* are used commonly on /tg/, just not usually outside of a meme. Nothing personal kid.
>>47112412
>just not usually outside of a meme
There's a reason for that.
>>47112412
Who cares? Why aren't you posting elves, eeeeh?
>>47112558
You mean Sluts.
>>47111540
What did you say about my waifu?
>TinkholdingJimatgunpoint.jpg
>>47112599
Sluuuuuts.
>>47110903
Wished the ear-winks were canon in 40K.
>>47111245
I always wanted to write something like this
>be human boy in lame human village
>hear one day that elfen bards are visiting our tavern and will perform
>all the boys and men get excited
>we all have read those picture books from the far east
>our crotches are swollen by anticipation
>the day has come, but we are late, the tavern is already bursting with people
>wait a minute
>this is not the sound of human men grunting and masturbating under the table, but high-pitched screaming girl voices
>I never thought that elves would sing like this
>we enter
>wait another minute
>those are the girls of the village shrieking, completely out of control
>their heads follow every dance move of these unbelievable handsome elven guys
>their bodies shiver at every hip shake of these timeless elven bodies
>their minds faint everytime these charming elven smiles are directed at them
>local priests carry the exhausted girls out of the tavern
>they were prepared, they knew
>but they didn't prepare us
>"Guys, let's just leave" was all that I could say
>the party didn't stop until the next morning
>some never returned
>>47112844
And then every elf boyband member was killed to ensure human women everywhere safe and remained faithful.
The end.
>>47112844
That's the funny thing.
For every horny human fucking a single elven girl, there are 10 hornier elven guys fucking 10 human women each.
Have some old elf.
>>47112940
So...what you're saying is i now have a reason to outright kill all male elves on sight in every campaign from here on out.
>>47112844
I thought that was how elves generally worked. Only on places like 4chan do I see people saying shit along the lines of "ELF SLUTS LMAO". I am used to D&D books pushing half-elves as coming from male-elf & female-human as well, but that could just be selective memory.
>>47113021
Well, I mean, just look at this.
Sluuuut.
>>47113046
Sure, and most of the thread is the same generic anime elves that we see every thread.
It's just kind of one of those boring little things that started as a fun subversion but now is just a generic consistency across the boards. Which isn't to say it should change, it's part of the board culture now, but we should be able to recognize it as such.
>>47113021
No, you are correct. Half-elves born from human mothers also have the benefit of a shorter gestation. It just doesn't fit the fetish narrative of /tg/.
>>47113021
4chan in general pushes the straight, white, human male as the pinnacle of creation.That might be because being straight, white male is the only thing that many fa/tg/uys have going for them and they want to feel like the top dog for once in their lives./pol/ please don't come
>>47113093
>>47113102
>>47113104
I want a setting, where the half elves saw themselves as the supreme race since they get the best of both worlds, and eventually go Third Reich on the humans and elves, because HALF ELF STRONK (maybe they'll try to rebrand themselves as halvsies or something).You'd also think that, considering the Aryan properties of elves, you'd see more elves in Nazi-ish uniforms
>>47109426
Where can one find the gay grox porn?
>>47113136
Stupid.
Half-elves are seen as basically elves by human supremacists.
Half-elves are seen as basically humans by elf supremacist.
Also, you need both elf and a human to create one half-elf, which, no matter what /tg/ tells you, doesn't occur that often.
Finally, half-elves are not really a race, and like every product of two species mating, they are sterile, so they can't really spin the whole race war thing really well.
Friendly reminder.
>>47113201
In your setting, maybe.
>>47113266
That would be every setting outside of your weeb magical realm.
>>47113266
So how does it work in YOUR setting, huh? Half-elves are a separate species? Just think about it. I doesn't make sense!
>>47113255
Check the thread before posting.
>>47113319
Tales of Symphonia does the Half Elf supremacist thing (though I don't think they ever say anything on the ability of the half elves to reproduce).
>>47113333
Same way it worked in real life, with people thinking that "white" is a biological "race" that is superior to others?Which would imply that humans and elves are technically the same species from a biological standpoint, which I'm completely fine with.
>>47106290
I want to read a quest based off of that image.
>>47113373
>Elves, dwarves, orcs, etc. are just subraces of humans!
That must be one of the least interesting twists on standard fantasy species.
>>47113421
What if we took the Macross route, where everyone is a descendant/produced by some forerunner race?
>Or everyone is just a different type of halfling?
>>47113333
You ever see that Incase comic about the aliens? Replace the aliens with elves.
How do you handle ears in your settings?
>>47113476
Indicators of emotion and can wiggle.
>>47113489
I'm pretty sure that's a Yokai.
>>47113508
Hush. She's sensitive about that.
>>47113489
That's highly close to the elven equivalent of clitoral winking.
>>47113476
Elves are technically erogenous zones. Especially during arousal. Why not more pleasure from wider surface area meaning more nerves? Ears believe it or not also are quite emotive in humans as well. They raise in alertness just like dogs, face forward in interest, lie back when threatened, and dip down when being submissive or embarassed. They're often the biggest tell for poker players as the movements are often impossible to fully suppress or replicate consciously. Its also more prevalent in detached earlobes due to more freedom of movement but still minor. The issue is the orientation of the ears when facing someone, their size, and peoples subconcious tendency to pay close attention to the eyes, mouth, and face when observing someone make these movements all but obscure to the average observer. I'd imagine that again due to size the ears would be much more emotive in elves.
>>47113629
>Elves are technically erogenous zones.
Awesome headcanon, let's not make the elf-ears special in any way. Hell, a woman's body is technically an erogenous zone, why not an elfs as well? Thus we can assure that elves and humans are as alike as possible, which is damn interesting. After all, humans with pointy ears are the best elves!Nah, I like my ear nibbling
>>47111255
>>47111538
I can't find anything either
I got the ultimate elf right here:
>>47113716
>>47113684
You know damn well what i meant but i like the way you think.
>>47110662
God damn, why can't I find elves with this hairstyle? It's like artists think an elf will spontaneously combust if they either don't have their bangs slicked back, a braid, or some other hair tying technique.
>>47113476
Not fucking perpendicular to the head, an upward diagonal mostly along the side like a normal ear is what I prefer.Gotta get real close for them ear nibbles.
>>47113752
Now I'm reminded of the time my elf got trapped in a room of pressure plates that randomized opening the door, shooting arrows, toggling toxic gas, or blowing the fuck up. Guess who just remembered he had 1/day dimension door after the door opened and at least one of each was set off?
>>47114289
I suppose it goes into hair grows pretty long in a decade let alone a century. Braiding and wrapping can shorten that by a third. Thats a lot of hair to have in the way fighting and a lot to get in your eyes. Why not make it manageable by shortening it and aiming it backwards or tying it up out of the way without the regrettable loss of hair?
>>47113476
Of course a fettishy drawing I did would be the first one that gets reposted around /tg/...l'm so proud!
>>47111538
>>47113695
>>47091766
http://pastebin.com/3U5QThDU
>>47114566
This is /tg/ and an elf thread, what did you expect?
>>47114458
But perpendicular, emotive ears are cute. Cute! And could potentially lie flat as necessary.
>>47107633
Fgt pls, elves are not for purging.
>>47111775
>yfw a hot eldar woman goes with a shy and socially awkward human guy rather than the old and bitter you.
What if I'm everything except old?
There is a huge amount of traditional games in this thread. I'm really proud of you, /tg/.
>>47111800
Both the filename and >>47111809 are wrong, that's a Dark Eldar Kabalite, look at the pistols, and armguards, those are splinter pistols and if you look at a Dark Eldar Kabalite model, it's the same.
The only part you're still correct about is slut.
>>47111531
I don't want to be that guy, but...
Sauce?
Um, my ears are really sensitive. Like, no other part of my body is ticklish. Then my fianceelicks them
Am I an elf with round ears?
>>47115236
Maybe?
>>47115236
Theres a piss ton of erogenous zones on the human body and people vary in the sensitivity of those areas. The only clear cut "fact" is that women tend to feel more erogenous zones then men do.
Womens nipples, neck, lower abdomen, inner thighs, feet top and bottom, and face tend to be active in most cases whereas men have face, lower abdomen and inner thighs.
All area's can be trained in sensitivity in both genders. Men can have insanely sensitive nipples same as women with training. Same for hips, back, ears and literally every other erogenous zone. You are one of the few who's ears are actively sensitive no training required.
>>47114985
While I won't deny emotive ears are cute, there's nothing keeping less exaggerated ears from being emotive themselvesand most importantly not look like the head is trying to fly away.
>>47115398
That's no elf, that's a hylian precursor!Which are explicitly stated to be humans in Skyward Sword.
>>47113476
>>47119047
Just because your god took the top half of your dick away doesn't mean you should take it out on others.
>>47107850
That's a gnome though
>>47119257
..and?
>>47115832
The difference in nipples is mostly just our perception. Women have it slightly more sensitive on average but the overall gap isn't that large and both men and women tend to be slightly above or below said average. It's simply a very neglected area for men. Also ears is a big thing for men apparently. I think it's usually one though like the right ear.
>>47119700
Left ear and during arousal. the ones i mentioned can LEAD to arousal but its a total crap shoot after arousal is attained.
So someone once mentioned on how'd it be if the Eldar of WH40K be like if they saw all those lewds, smut and banter discussions about these fictional "Elf" beings that so happen to look like them.
So how would a typical uptight Eldar be like when seeing such a lewd artwork of an elf and a human making love?
>>47122661
>So how would a typical uptight Eldar be like when seeing such a lewd artwork of an elf and a human making love?
>>47115010
>A timid Imperial Guardsman: "...D- do those same things apply for... Eldar???"
>>47122677
Bitch please, if a Eldar so happens to come across pics of humans and elves making love like that >>47122661 they'd initially yell out
"LOL! MONKEIGH FUCKER! That poor girl has such poor tastes. And look at her licking that dirty monkeigh face..." First awkward silence. AND THEN, the Eldar will proceed to fap to that image, look for more pics of elves and humans making love. THEN will proceed to flirt with the next guardsmen they come across with.
>>47122661
>>47123079
is there ever peace between humans and eldar in 40k?
if not i can only see rape as a possible scenario.
>>47119047
>and then the allied human forces save those elves from being further brutalized by those savages
>>47110214
i get to pitch, thats it.
>>47111557
>>47111592
>>47111597
>>47111603
>>47111614
...Elven knight slut???
>>47114487
I'm probably way too bored if I went ahead and did this, but assuming an average human speed of hair growth sourced at .44mm/daywhich is already assuming too much since elves=/=humans, probably, a 365.25-day year, and that elven hair doesn't just fall out after a certain time like a human's does, after only 100 years that's already 16.07 meters, or 50ish feet. I fail to imagine how someone could tie that up into any kind of sensible hairstyle without cutting it.
>>47123469
In 40k less then their use to be. The Great Crusade really smashed any rare examples of peace and coexistence Eldar and individual human colonies had. Emperor rejected an Eldar alliance because Eldrad warned him of a possible bad end, later Vulcan burned down a group of Exodites and Humans who were hanging out together because he fucking hated Dark Eldar, ironic since the exact reason they were hanging out was to defend themselves from Deldar, and Fulgrim went fucking nuts due to his chaos sword and destroyed a handful of Maiden worlds and I think a minor craftworlds in quick succesion making tonnes of Eldar hate humans and Space Marines with a passion.
Can still get a handful of Eldar hanging with an Ordo Xenos Inquisitor if he proves to be a cool guy and the fates show helping him will save Eldar lives.
>>47124320
I can't see her boobs.
So tastefully garbed lady elf knight.
>Unlike purple elf slut in pic related
>>47122712
>>47106290
>>47110446
>>47111315
>meanwhile in a different magical-fantasy land
>Standard Infantry: "I can't believe this. The Spec-Ops guys and the marines get to be with those elves, but we regular 'ol infantry divisions have to be in Happy Fun Candy Land. 'Go to Happy Fun Candy Time Land, high command and the elf allies said it'll be simple, kill uncivilized goblins and wretches, make friends with the faeries.' Making friends with the faeries my ASS. We're stuck with this fairy-pixie chatter boxes while the marines and special forces boys get to have hot elf action."
>>47124804
>Do you know about timed hits?
laughed more than I should have
>>47124804
>be me/us, leader(s) of elf and other fantasy lands
>we're getting invaded and pummeled by "evil" forces like those dark/drow elves, barbaric orcs, evil wizards, goblin hordes, and other evil shit
>suddenly these humans arrive, but these humans are very different from the type of humans we know
>these humans are from the further Western Lands and they all look different, speak the same tongue as most humans but the way the talk is just so... Different, and the most notable thing about them is their technology, especially their weapons
>their warriors, knights and commanders wear uniforms that match the environment and they seem to wear little to no armor save for those helmets and masks of theirs, and they wield no sword nor shield but they wield those ranged projectile weapons of theirs that are loud and do massive damage against metal aswell
>and they ride mechanized carriages with no horses and have flying machines that reach speeds for than we can imagine, they also have mechanized carriages that are fully dedicated for war and shoot explosive projectiles even further
>the humans of the Western Lands meet up with us and offer to help us and bring peace and form and alliance with us, as the forces of evil tried invading their lands but were able to repel the invaders
>we accept their help and alliance because we need that much help, and within a few weeks we gain ground and victories
>their flying war machines even dealt a great blow against the enemies by bombing supply lines and important locations and the land war machines of the humans in the west decimated the orcish siege machines
>after assessing the current situation, we may win in defending our lands thanks to these humans.
>I think we made a good choice in this one, any further wisdom?
>>47125232
Ask for these "swuimsuits." I hear they improve one's charisma and endurance.
>>47122712
"Alright guardsman, spill it out. You and that banshee who's temporarily staying with us have been having sex in that old abandoned building have? Come on, you're not the first one to ever fraternize with this pointy-eared xenos, guardsmen who're shy, timid and awkwards; such as yourself. Have a well known tendency to cozy up to them eldar, and THEY seem to like cuddling up to shy-timid-socially-awkward guys like you... And frankly I think its good you've got a love making partner, 'cause hey better die in battle and knowing you had sex than dying a virgin ma right?"
>>47124791
"Piss of 'Commissar', I know a phony when I see one. And dear lord you're not even wearing the complete uniform, just a forged cap and an cheap unbuttoned coat. Fuck off phony, as a staff sergeant I'm now ordering you to get the frak outta here!"
>>47125232
>be operator in fantasy land
>fight magical bullshit all the fucking time
>seriously, this one short dude with a beard threw fucking lightning at us
>RIP mikhail, who knew that ogres took that much 7.62 to put down
>cyka blyat
>locals wont stop fucking asking me how my AK works
>this one girl has been following us for a week
>are those ears pointy?
>maybe she'll go away and stay somewhere safe
>>47110855
>>47110903
>>47111255
>>47111794
>>47126360
>"Ah yes, your commanders made the obvious mistake in going boots-on-the-ground against Ogres, creatures like those are best dealt with via airstrikes and air or armored support. As for that mage, utilize long range combat and snipers as much as possible. No wizard is ever immune to such things like a .338 Lapua to the head.
As a matter of fact Corporal Antonov, you should best learn to master the arcan arts. Ever since the discovery of these magical beings, we soldiers and marines are now highly encouraged to learn and master the mystic arts to give us a further edge against our enemies along with our weapons. Seriously Corporal Antonov, you and your friends best enroll to the College of Wizardry and learn some destruction, healing and alteration spells. I'm sure your commanders also encourage it and tell you to do so."
>>47124699
'Nother elf slut guys
>>47124804
">Hey take it easy man, be glad you guys are in the land of sugary sweets and fairies and pixies. We on the other hand have to be in the deeper south parts where its snowing and shit. The Snow-Born guys are pretty OK being here, but us folk who grew up in the regular climate areas fucking hate it here. Maybe you guys can have hot fairy-sexy action?"
>>47126615
What have you done to poor skyrim you monster?!?
>>47126615
>>47126806
Looks more like Daenerys Targaryen as an Elf.
>ideal relationship status between human and elf? Human wife or husband is the stay at home parent who'll take care of the kids (if you'll have kids atleast), do all the house work like cleaning and cooking
>while the elf wife or husband is the bread winner of the house
>why you as a human is the stay-at-home-parent?
>Because your elf lover wants the rest of your remaining life to be bliss and stress-free...
>>47126956
>Stress free
>Dealing with half evlven monstrosities
>>47106290
>Also would thou approve of a scenario presented in pic; human just having friendly chats with a wood elf?
Sure. It's always nice to see people (and other sapients) happy and having fun
>>47127017
>Civilization plagued by freakish half-breeds
>>47126956
>be human man married to beautiful elf maiden
>its been five years since you and your elf wife have meet and dated, and three years ever since you both married
>you are now a much older middle-aged man who's gotten slightly chubby over the years ever since you decided to be stay at home house-husband to take care of the half-elf child your wife has conceived after acts of love making
>while your elf wife is the bread winner of the house as she also works as a magic instructor
>after a day of playing and taking care of your child, you are able to put him to bed early and you make dinner for you and your wife
>your wife comes home and is happy to see you and the fact you kept the house clean and you made dinner
>you and your elf wife wash the dishes after finishing dinner, then your elf wife playfully suggest you and her have some good old sexy-fun-times
>you say yeah and you jokingly say you are not as good looking as you used to as you pat your plump belly
>she joyfully doesn't mind and is just glad to be with you
>you both make it to your bedroom as you bot begin the foreplay
>then you both begin to get a little more frisky as you both start fucking passionately
>after three hours of love making you both feel relieved and relax as you both fall asleep, still in each other's embrace
>life as a house husband married to lovely elf maiden with a lovely half-breed child is good.
>>47127087
>>47127092
Now now. People like You ain't gonna get no cutie elf waifus with that attitude.
>>47127017
>>47127092
Aww c'mon guys, continuous love making between humans and elf will result in more half-elf people being born which will also eventually lead to a similar creation of the Bretons from TES.
Human and Elf features and abilities all in one sexy package all thanks to screwing with elves.
What if elves naturally excretedskub?
>>47127092
Good 'ole numbuh 30
>>47124804
>>47126717
>"Hey guys, Lieutenant Hargraves here in the Fantasy-Desert Land. Yeah I get what y'all mean; one of you stuck in a land that's literally a girly-kid's show program with annoyingly vapid characters and pixie-fairy shits that won't shut up, and the other is in a freezing tundra hellhole.
We Ranger Battalions have it worse, 'cause like I mentioned earlier, we're in a fucking desert. And no hot-desert elves to be found, just some desert-dwelling-reptile-folk, and desert-cat people; no, these desert-cat people are not as 'kawaii' as the cat folk well know and love. But hey as soon as we defeat these forces of evil, we can all get home, make friends with elven and other magical allies and have sex with 'em."
>>47110855
>>47110903
Yisss!!! Have another cute and soft looking space elf babe.
>>47127154
>Now now. People like You ain't gonna get no cutie elf waifus with that attitude.
I know I'm not, for plenty of unrelated reasons, but what's wrong with being happy to see other people be happy?
>>47127274
>is it me or is there less and less "Humanity Fuck Yeah!" and more "Yeah I love to be in a friendly relationship with other sapients."
>mfw
>>47127579
Fluctuates depending on how horny /tg/ is at the moment.
>>47126717
it's not all elf sex and fun out here soldier. We think the dark elves have agents getting info out of the soldiers they're fucking. Also Vasily has spiders growing out of his crotch now.
>>47127318
I'd wana frick-frack the elf in >>47127154 's pic.
Is she a brown elf? Or a wood elf? If wood elf, hope she's not a yandere...
>>47127975
>hope she's a yandere
fixed
>>47128012
That's not fixed, you're just retarded. Yandere girl's aren't faithful. They moment they realize you're not the perfect person they had imagined, you're dead, and your corpse is defiled.
>>47128012
Most wood elves actually have healthy dose of common sense. Yandere ones are usually urban elves that snapped under weight of white collar drudgery and came into the woods off the deep end, believing they would "return to their roots" or something like that.
>>47127822
So when will there be a horrifying scenario where the human soldiers and the non-evil elves/High Elf and Wood Elf soldiers rape a captured Drow/Dark Elf commander? As a form of payback for the attrocities said Dark/Drow Elf committed.
>elf-human joint ops capture a high ranking dark/drow elf leader and kill her subordinates
>as the dark elf is captured she's beaten up by mainly the elves for the crimes and atrocities she committed, especially the elven and human POWs under her
>the humans soldiers yell at her and also join the beating of her, such as rifle butting her with their guns, and kurb-stomping her
>then one of the human marines speak up to her
>"THIS IS WHAT YOU GET! *rifle butts her* THIS IS WHY WE DON'T NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORIST SCUMBAGS LIKE YOU!!!! YOU HONESTLY THOUGHT RIPPING OPEN OUR COLLEGES AND COMRADES WOULD 'SCARE' US FROM FIGHTING YOU DARK ELF BASTARDS! *rifle butts her lower body* WHATS THE MATTER YOU EDGY-GOTH WHORE!? I THOUGHT YOU FUCKING BITCHES LIKE IT ROUGH! *kicks her* YOU REMEMBER LIEUTENANT VASILY SULEJMANI!?"
>the dark elf looks up to him and the human soldier continues
>"YOU KNOW!? THE OFFICER YOU FIRST RIPPED APART IN FRONT OF A CAMERA AND SENT IT IN VIDEO THINKING YOU CAN INTIMIDATE US!? THE GUY WAS MORE THAN HERO! HE HAD A FAMILY! FRIENDS, AND DID GREATER THINGS THAT MAKE YOU INSIGNIFICANT IN COMPARISON!!! ...And he was my bestest friend I ever had since childhood, and you gutted him inhumanely like an animal."
>the soldier scans the dark elf's body and grins as he immediately restrains her with plasticuffs her got from his pouch
>then one of the elven allies speak up
>"WAIT! You're actually going to do it Lieutenant Ackerman!? You're really going rape her are you."
>the human lieutenant glares back at his elven comrade, then the elf replies with a grin
>"...Not that I'm stopping you. Honestly. Compared to the atrocities she's committed, what you're about to do is NOTHING compared to what she's done."
>will continue
>>47128853
>the human lieutenant chuckles and proceeds to rip off the dark elf's lower garments
>the dark elf screams and attempts to kich the human off, only for the lieutenant Ackerman to punch her reapeadedly in the face
>the human lieutenant then puts down his primary gun and his sidearm pistol beside a table at the room they're all in
>the human lieutenant then takes of his helmet, his combat vest and various other gear and hands it over to one of the soldiers or the staff sergeant under his lead to hold on to it
>he walks back to the dark elf, and then he sees the dark elf has fear in her face
>"Ohhoho you're scared huh? I guess you know what I'am gonna do HUH!? YEAH THAT'S RIGHT, IM GONNA FUCK THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF YOU! AND I DOUBT YOU DARK SKINNED FUCKERS ARE REDEEMABLE, SO IREDEEMABLE I'M GONNA BE A SAINT ONCE I'M DONE RAPING THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF YOU!"
>the elves and other human soldiers laugh at his joke, the elves then continue taunthing her in the elven tongue, some of which the soldiers recognize as; 'You should have surrendered while you still can.', 'This is what you savages get.' and one elf even said in the elven tongue towards the dark elf; 'You are fucked, LITERALLY!'
>some of the depraved human operative whip out their cameras and or phones to record the whole ordeal while the elven allies just continue jeering and insultig the dark elf
>one of the human soldiers even said directly to the dark elf; "WELL BITCH, YA BETTAH PRAY TO THE GREAT MIOGHTY SPIDER LOLTH TO WISK U AWEA!"
>another human soldier; a woman, mocks the dark elf by pretending to be her; "GREAT 'N MIGHTY MATRIARCH LOLTH PLEASE HELP ME! HELP ME! THE LESSER ANIMALS ARE GOING TO RAPE ME! SAVE ME AND I WILL SACRIFICE TEN VIRGIN BOYS IN YOUR NAME!!!"
>and so the human lieutenant goes down to the dark elf and proceeds to violate her in the most barbaric way possible as the elven comrades continue to jeer and the human soldiers laugh and mock at the dark elf's expense
>>47128853
>>47128859
Nah, it would be an impromptu military tribunal for warcrimes with a guilty verdict reached in 5 minutes, then a swift execution followed by the body being dumped in an unmarked grave. We're not savages.
>>47128935
Well maybe that took place in whatever place is that drow's HQ is, the human soldiers and elves have her restrained on the spot and the vengeful human officer proceeded to violate the drow woman where the only witnesses are his friends and elf colleges who are chill with it. Without the high command knowing any better.
>>47128853
>>47128859
elf threads.....elf thread never changes
>>47128970
ok virt
>>47128935
"There's...question we have about the condition of the body."
"what kind of questions?"
"Mostly why its entire pelvic region is a caved in mess. Thats not even getting into the shattered jaw or the rest of the bones. And forensic is saying by the bruising their best bet is she died well after those injuries were sustained. Now, soldier, very very few of there who have talked and those that did say she took a trip down some stairs. Can you tell me what REALLY happened?"
"She tripped down her throne room stairs running away."
"........"
"Can i go now?"
".....yes."
If no on blabs and its sounding like everyone is in on it so no one wants a court martial then there will be all of jackshit for consequences besides possibly never being promoted again and have eyes on you 24/7 looking for any excuse to discharge.
Believe it or not theres thousands of case like this for the US military alone. Where some idiot civilian catches a squad doing things they shouldn't be then squeals to someone high up on base. They all basically get called in and questioned. Assuming no one goes "yeah we were raping that dudes wife. so what?" They can't actually do jack shit about it. Theres even evidence of serious suppression of things like video and photography to avoid scandal and to ensure we stay on mostly friendly terms with the locals.
