>lawful good
>>46487463
>lawful good
kill em all, let the gods sort it out. im here to enforce the law
>>46487492
What law did this baby break?
>>46487463
I'm proud to say that my Paladin once committed Orc genocide, by creating concentration camps where Baleful Polymorph was cast en masse to turn them into harmless animals, birds and doves to give them 'new lives' freed from their cursed bodies.
We actually turned into a religion, where orcs would strive to make themselves sufficiently pure to ascend. Since we'd already killed off all the warriors and the orc priesthood in the crusades, there was no one to turn them back: And accordingly to the rules for Baleful Polymorph, you lose your mind permanently if you fail a Will Save, which was mathematically impossible for these 0-level NPCs to pass.
Eventually, they built a statue of my character, in marble. In one hand, he takes the hand of an orc child. In the other, he holds a dove, symbolizing the promise of rebirth.
He also has a huge, shit-eating grin.
>>46487537
It's an illegal immigrant
>>46487550
Ah, I remember being an shitty 14 year old too.....horrible times......
>>46487537
>alignment: always chaotic evil
>>46487584
Actually, we never killed anyone.
Not a single innocent was harmed. We could not kill women and children, even if they were orcs.
The solution, instead, was deemed incredibly humane, farsighted, and it looked really pretty. (i.e. The visual symbolism of a huge crowd of orcs become a huge cloud of doves.)
It was also amazingly evil, and my character loved it because he hated their entire race.
>>46487537
Royal edicts no non-humans could be brought into the kingdom. offenders would be given 24 hours to leave, before being executed for breaking the law
i don't make the laws, i just enforce them. i wanted them all hauled off to the labor camps in the Boreal Mountains to mine for syntheium and be tossed against the resurgent Kobold threat.
>>46487593
they didn't break the law
>>46487614
Ah. My apologies, then,
>>46487463
>betraying the law
>>46487623
Killing an innocent baby is an evil act,You have to move it safely to greenskin territory now or else you will fall.
>>46487682
But it will invariably become evil and commit evil.
>>46487711
that's true but it hasn't happened yet, ergo the child is still innocent.
>>46487682
>implying that baby is innocent
>implying that you watched that baby 24/7 to know if it is completely innocent 100 percent of the time
>implying that i'm a paladin
>>46487750
Freud plz go
>>46487463
> Craddle not conform to standard, built with freaking sharp stakes.
Parents sure aren't lawful.
> Possible squint, should consult an ophthalmologist
>>46487682
>orc
>innocent
Every race has an original sin. No one is innocent. What matters is the views of the god whom the paladin follows.
>>46487463
I have a better version of this dilemma
>neutral good follower of neutral god of humans
>god of humans state that all orcs must be killed always
>find orc baby
>wat do?
>>46487794
I don't see a dilemma.
>>46487775
No, no. Not the parents. Your alignment is being called into question. After all it's good/evil to kill a baby of an always chaotic evil race.
>>46487808
killing babies is evil
not killing baby goes against religion
seems like a dilemma to me.
>>46487794
kill the baby, find repentance in the graces of God by giving a tithe to my local church, or go on a penitent quest if the local head of the clergy interprets His will to do so
I'm curious as to where the idea of "killing babies of always evil races is evil"
If they're always evil, as in, evil is part of their physiology, then even the baby is evil. The only reason he's not doing evil is because he doesn't have the physical capacity to do so.
>>46487826
If there could come any good from orcs not being killed always, the god would hardly be neutral.
There is likely no good that can come from not killing this orc.
Killing this orc is a neutral act.
>>46487794
If the god stated that, the god wouldn't be NG. So your premise doesn't work.
>>46487885
Not that guy but the human god in his/her example was neutral. Requiring members of evil races to be killed on sight also might fit into certain good gods portfolios (depending on the edgyness of the writer)
>>46487463
D'aww. Babies default to the alignment of Chaotic Adorable.
>>46487826
>killing babies is evil
Not if you worship Baal or live in Sparta
>Error: Parental protocols not located.
>Secondary programming engaged: Purge all orcoids.
Unfortunate for the child that he came across an unfeeling machine.
>>46487463
>adopt the baby
>raise him as a good person
Problem solved
>>46487826
>killing always chaotic evil babies is evil
By the standards of a fantasy god? Probably not.
>>46488093
>kill when he´s an adult
Problem solveder
>>46487826
>killing babies is evil
killing orcs isn't evil
no dilemma
>>46488093
They're orcs, they will become evil. Alignments are tangible things. It's straight up in their nature just like breathing is in ours.
>>46488140
>they will become evil
They won't if you become good parental figure
>>46488199
You're not understanding. Alignments are tangible energies because D&D is fucking silly. Orcs are full of chaotic evil energy.
>>46487812
Listen men, I'm from the CPS and I'm going to make sure this place is up to standards!
>>46487463
Is this an Orc baby, an Ogre baby, or a Goblin baby?
>>46488277
orc
>>46488232
can you find a female orc and fill her with lawful good energy?
If you know what I mean?
>>46488277
it's a baby
>>46488277
All of them
Well, ya see son, that there is a orc baby paladin, blessed by the gods to do good and what-not. Ya get one every so often, used to be rarer a'fore the gods loosened their standards. The orcs tolerate em 'cause most of em don't make it to adulthood without falling, s'where all those orcish blackguards come from.
Heck, nothing makes a better war leader than an orcish blackguard. Ya ever think to yerself, "Ya know, those orcs are pretty much like us when you leave out all the blatant evil stuff." Maybe even if ya leave it in, depends on yer level o' cynicism. Well, that's intentional, ya see. It's so they'll get themselves some nice blackguard war-leaders. Paladins are nice leaders too and all but they're pretty straight and narrow, what with the stick up their bum. What, hadn't heard o' that? Keeps em from fallin' off their horse in battle, all the best paladins do it. But now ya got me gettin' sidetracked.
So yeah, paladins are fine leaders and all, but they're pretty picky about picking their battles. Heck, most don't even pick their nose. I even heard a' one that done lost his powers that way, talk about a picky patron, guess his diety was the one with the stick up their bum. But anyways, you want a nice war leader, ya gotta have someone who's willing to get their hands dirty. Blackguards are nice and flexible as far as that goes. Flexible in other ways too, did I ever tell ya about how I met yer grandma? Ah, yer still a little young fer that one though.
Now where was I? Oh right, so most o' those holy little snotlings lose their powers and end up workin' for the other side, but occasionally you get one so straight and narrow even the orcs can't dislodge that stick from their bum. Those ones end up leavin' their people and their evil-makin ways behind, usually end up as adventurers. There's actually quite a few o' them, but it's hard to tell, most o' em keep their helmets on. Most end up fightin' against their own folks too, s'pretty tragic.
>>46488337
>If you know what I mean?
Healing spells?
>>46488331
>>46488337
>>46488364
I ask because each one's going to require different formula.
Orcs have higher protein needs, goblins need more simple sugars, and growing ogres require lots of fat.
>>46488397
what about hobgoblins?
>>46487750
>implying that baby is innocent
>>46488407
Complex carbohydrates and Vitamin A.
>>46487584
>Calling someone edgy for redeeming an all evil-race.
Be less retarded or kill yourself.
>>46488387
no. But it does involves some lay on hands if you know hat I mean
>>46487463
>Baby
Always a Chaotic Evil alignment (Just like real life)
>Orc
Always Lawful Good
Now what do ya do?
>>46488397
>raising someone else's kids
C-C-Cuck!
>>46488387
Yep, alignment discernment and alignment fixing with holy energies are standard prenatal procedure. Some countries even provide them for free for their evil citizens.
>>46488442
>all evil race
Sounds like a shitty game.
A shitty rules lawyer solution for a shitty game.
Sounds about right
>>46487614
Pro-tip- if you can rules lawyer your way out of a moral dilemma, you have a shitty DM. If you can only answer a moral dilemma using rules lawyering, then you are in a shitty game.
>>46488490
Kill all babies.
I'll pick up my nobel prize on my way back home
Who says I'm not evil? I've got a character right now raising a baby red dragon with the whole point being to raise him to be more of a Dunkelzahn type figure than a Smaug sort of one.
Because Lawful Evil is best evil.
Your claws are long and can reach into a great many coinpurses of a great many dead men but you only have four of them and try as you might that route will never let you steal half as much as compound interest.
>>46488541
But Anon! Orcs are a noble and good race! You'd be doing great evil by depriving the world of them!
>>46488531
/thread
>>46488531
>>all evil race
>Sounds like a shitty game.
And you sound like a hipster who's mad because D&D is popular.
>>46488531
To be fair it's in-setting and acknowledged as something that exists in the setting. There are even spells for detecting alignmemts. Does it make it a good game? Not really. Is it rules lawyer? No.
>>46488531
a religion without rules-lawyering is a shitty one
Moral dilemmas that are designed to fuck over people playing a specific alignment are strictly under the domain of shitty DMs and militant fedoras.
>>46488531
Sometime I want to see a system where the point IS to be a rules lawyer. Like you play some sort of space diplomats in the bureaucratic confederation of technocracies and has to make your way playing the rules by the rules.
Then it go meta and you can play the rules of the game itself.
I mean I probably won't play it, but I would like to see one.
> "Ah! They are starting to shoot at us, we won the argument!"
>>46487463
Where are the parents?
>>46487463
>>46488752
Ended rightly and lawfully.
>>46487492
You're a shit player and I'm glad I'm not your DM.But with an attitude like that I doubt you even have a DM at all.
>>46488791
bitch please kill'em all is the only proper response to a DM that uses the orc baby dilemma on a paladin.
After that you leave the game because that's a shitty dm.
Gygax is in favor of killing the orc baby
>>46488775
>okie dokie
>>46488703
Seems like a good idea for an alien race in a space opera setting. They would have a convoluted series of rules dating back to their earliest recorded history, which they would utilize to guide or justify every single action, twisting the rules as necessary to make it fit and dragging every race they meet into their arguments as they assume everyone follows their rules. The most aggravating thing for other races would be how the species is always convinced they're in the right, even as their ships go down in plasma fire.
>>46487492
But that's lawful neutral, and an extreme lawful neutral at that. You poopy-head.
>>46488919
>enforcing the law can't be good
>>46488791
why? if you're playing a DnD, and the DM gives you an Orc baby when they are always chaotic evil, i fall either way by letting evil go in the world when i could stop it, or i kill the baby and i fall that way. im just going along with what the DM wants if i was playing a paladin.
though, in my instance i wasn't talking about a paladin
but once again, depends on the setting
>>46488916
I have very vague memory of a book where some race had highly complex trials but didn't believe in justice, so every trials was only about being the worst rules shark possible.
Also Adeptus Administratum RPG.
>>46487463
>autism: the thread
Adventure idea: evil nuns turn the orc kids at their orphanage into a small army
Dindu nuffin
>>46488554
>I've got a character right now raising a baby red dragon with the whole point being to raise him to be more of a Dunkelzahn type figure than a Smaug sort of one.
>lawful stupid populace wont let you solve the orc problem
>instead just gather all the orcs and breed them
>release them into the city as "refugees"
>populace is no longer an annoying problem because they no longer exist
>>46489937
What would you do if you were playing D&D as a paladin and faced this dilemma?
>>46490440
call myself a noble savage and then do whatever i wanted, including killing the little green monster there
call anyone that disagrees with my actions racist
>>46487550
>>46487614
>relying on rules lawyering to be a paladin
If you're standing for the letter of your code and not it's spirit, you're a shitty Paladin. You are an instrument of divine wrath, not a fucking lawyer.
Either the church takes care of the Orphan'd orcs or you exterminate them due to their inherently corrupt nature.
>>46488232
Yes, but at a young age it's possible to domesticate them to not be of the evil alignment. They gravitate towards evil, but they can be tamed.
Lest we forget all those retarded threads about people redeeming succubuses.
>>46490593
Considering he said that his paladin /hated/ the orcs ("A paladin must not let hatred cloud his judgement" ring a bell), I think that was sort of the point.
>>46490612
Just because the succubus guys are silly and wrong doesn't mean you have to be too.
>Leader of the Black Knights
>can only use Holy spells
>wields a angels sword
>>46487794
raise it as a double agent
>>46488397
Orcs need protein eh? Well, a lawful good dwarf paladin cant let a little babe starve to death. *unzips dick*
>>46487794
>neutral god
>all orcs must be killed always
Sounds like a breakdown in communication.
Now, you could be a neutral good follower of a Lawful Evil god (not one given powers by that god, but a believer nonetheless) who would have no problem disobeying a commandment like that.
>>46488074
>worship Baal
Chaotic evil
>Sparta
Lawful Evil
try harder fuckbags
>>46488916
>>46488703
This sounds an awful lot like a Time Lord RPG. Especially that bit about whoever shoots first being the loser.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gds1oFBrcW0
In fact, following the idea of meta rules lawyering, if you added a narrative control mechanic, you'd have a pretty straight forward Doctor Who RPG. The Adventures of Baron Munchkin.
>>46488775
okie dokie artichokie
>>46490440
adopt tiny orc babby.
>>46488775
>mfw my regular response to anything is okie dokie
>>46487537
Blood bound to a demon and is a member of the invading force that arrived on Azeroth to wipe out it's population.
>>46487826
Killing babies is not inherently evil.
There is a thing called mercy killing.
>>46489056
DnD, and the DM gives you an Orc baby when they are always chaotic evil.
a) Orc aren't even usually chaotic evil, just often. not even usually means less than most. so under 50% of orcs are chaotic evil. babies of natural (i.e. barring demons and undead and the like) species are always neutral.
b) killing people just for being evil is evil. killing people for being a direct threat is not.
you think you are playing lawful good but really you are just playing genocidal stupid.
>>46490593
You need to stand for both. If the letter of the law doesn't reflect the spirit, it should be rewritten and clarified. If someone can consistently outwit your laws, you should hire him to revise them. Either way, you shouldn't punish anyone that doesn't break both the letter and the spirit of the law at the same time. If that makes you feel bad because you have to let someone go who's clearly evil, rest assured that there's plenty more evil out there for you to smite.
>>46487550
>>46487614
If I was your GM I would make your paladin fall for being a sick fuck that treats orc lives like toys.
>>46487550
>>46487593
>>46487875
>>46488140
>>46488089
>>46488232
the only "always" races are ones without free will, like devils. orcs are "often"
http://www.d20srd.org/srd/monsters/orc.htm
your character was lawful evil at best and if you kept your powers you had a shitty dm
>>46487794
the god isn't neutral. ordering genocide of a race with free will makes you evil
>>46492328
>orc lives matter abloobloobloo
no
>>46488531
I don't think orcs have ever been all-evil in any edition of D&D.
And, for that matter, "evil" has never had any serious mechanical baggage in anyworth playingedition of D&D.
>>46492338
>if you kept your powers you had a shitty dm
Baleful Polymorph isn't a paladin power, so it's possible his powers were being granted by a different cosmic being than the one he thought.
>>46492431
>>46492581
>>46492338
What if pre-3.x D&D?
>>46492738
so I did some research just now and orcs have been player character eligible since before the second edition. "Always evil" races never get this since most games do not allow evil PCs. So tl;dr, while "Always" "Usually" and "Often" didn't exist till 3rd, it's safe to say that orcs were never inherently evil in D&D, just typically.
>>46487550
>And accordingly to the rules for Baleful Polymorph, you lose your mind permanently if you fail a Will Save, which was mathematically impossible for these 0-level NPCs to pass.
Wrong. Natural 20 always succeeds. There actually exists a significant number of "harmless" animals that kept their intelligence, and bear a grudge against your Paladin (who definitely shouldn't be a Paladin anymore, by the way) and are currently plotting his demise.
Hope you didn't turn any of them into cats...
>>46487794
>>wat do?
Find a better god.
>>46492960
That's just a popular houserule and crits only apply to combat.
>>46491390
>*unzips dick*
Um... what?
>>46493045
Still wrong. It applies to attack rolls and saving throws. It's skill checks that it doesn't apply to, which is what causes all the fuss when people mention an automatic success on a skill check.
Unless you're referring to 2e or before, which I don't have much experience with. After that point, though, auto-fail and -success is a thing for saves and attacks both.
>>46493106
It's one of those maymays you heard so much about on leddit. A relatively old one too.
>>46487463
that baby can't be lawful good. Its too young to of even possibly developed some sort of moral framework in its tiny head
>>46493193
OP is accusing (You) of not being lawful good.
apparentaly "word of Gygax" is that the proper thing for a Paladin to do is to raise it until it's old enough to have formed a proper alignment of it's own, then if it's still evil despite the paladin's efforts to reform it, kill it, and if it's good, kill it anyhow becasue now it gets to go to one of the Good aligned afterlives and it's orcish nature won't tempt it to backslide to evil
>>46487463
So long as the Black Tyrant sill lives, that child is still doomed. When he created the Orcs to be his soldiers, he made sure that they would never be able to turn on him. Even if that child grew into a saint, it would be impossible for him to resist an order from Black Tyrant due to Orcs having a in built geas to serve him. The only time an Orc disobeyed one of his orders was due to being dominated by the most powerful mind controller of our time.
>>46493323
Gygax was a shitter
>>46487567
Make Faerun great again.
>>46493323
He also went with a Good is not nice outlook. Meaning LG didn't need to get caught up with how it smote evil.
>>46487463
Depends on the setting.
>>46487463
Oh, the lawful good choice?
Roll your eyes, leave, find a better DM.
>>46493426
>tfw I'm trying to make a Donald Trump character
He'll probably crash and fail horribly, but at least I tried
>>46493538
But real life doesn't have alignments!
>>46493618
Is BBEG of the campaign deranged ogre matriarch, wife of former tribe leader?
>>46492686
this is the stupidest logic i have ever seen.
>i helped people kill people
>ergo the people i helped are evil, and if i kill them i am doing a good thing
no, you just killed people, and then killed more people for no reason.
its like killing vietnamese civilians, and then killing Allied soldiers for telling you to.
both actions are evil.
>>46493647
>Is BBEG of the campaign deranged ogre matriarch, wife of former tribe leader?
kek. Hell if I know. It's a campaign that's been running for a while so I'm just barely jumping in.
I'm planning for him to Bluff his way into the party with promises of gold and deporting all the shifty Halflings
>>46493715
>its like killing vietnamese civilians
>>46487463
>That feeling when you realize that you maybe Lawful good but you're also a racist to green skins
>>46493715
That's not what it's referring to. If you help the ghouls integrate the rest of the inhabitants will suddenly "disappear" later.
>>46489056
Who says you have to let the baby go or kill it?
Why not raise it and teach it the ways of righteousness?
>>46493815
Pinch the baby?
>>46493151
2e had System Shock, which you could still automatically succeed at.
>>46487623
>alignment: always chaotic evil
>they didn't break the law
They did break the law by being born! You must smite all the evil boy! ALL THE EVIL!
>>46493815
But that's completely okay in D&D because orcs are always evil by default, so you can be as much racist as you want towards them.
>>46494812
> orcs are always evil by default
People have repeatedly pointed out that this is not actually true... are you illiterate, or just trying to stir shit up?
>>46491390
You must plant the seeds of justice and good early.
>>46494915
NO I WANT TO BE A MEME POSTING SHITTER AND FORCE AN EPIC ALIGNMENT DILEMMA PROPOSED BY SPOONY BECAUSE HE'S MY IDOL
>>46494962
Spoony has a very black and white view that is really limited and believes in making players suffer
>>46492021
Technically, it was only their chieftains who did that.
The rest just drank what the warlocks gave them unknowingly because their chieftain said it was good shit from special shamans.
The problem is half the Orc race was set to become massive fucking assholes due to the fact that their home planet is Australia/Vietnam/nuclear winter on Mars and anyone who happened to come from a particularly pleasant or particularly hostile location were both complete fucking assholes culturally. The second Horde had absolutely no outreach to beat the shitty traditions out of those groups, so as a result half the population was a bunch of fucking assholes ready to go back to being evil whenever it was an option again.
Currently, those guys are dead. So the third Horde only really has the undead being assholes, and even the undead are splintering so its only really those under Sylvanas that are still evil.
>Dumb ass alignment discussion devolves into e-celeb shit.
Yeah get fucked /tg/
>>46495146
It's like two posts.
>>46487463
What kind of shitty paladin or cleric is incapable of converting and purifying their enemies?
If you're only capable of slaying the enemy, you're pretty fucking shit tier and that CHA stat is a waste.
>>46488497
This meme needs to end.
Not helping raise your neighbor's kids is why society these days is a bunch of socially retarded shut-ins who need "safe spaces".
You need to let kids beat the shit out of each other and call each other every name in the book to toughen them up.
>>46488385
Kek, sounds like a NPC I had. Asshole bartender that pointed us in the direction of some of the quest clients. Got zombified in the end, but still one of our favorites.
>>46492328
In my opinion right way to do it is to actually present what murderhobo paladins are doing as horrible and have graphic descriptions of their genociding. Have them slaughter orc families if they want to, but don't make them fall for it because they (should be atleast) feel like they're doing the right thing. Try to make it so that at some point they realize what they're doing is just committing atrocities in the name "goodness" and then make them fall.
>>46495217
There's this 3e supplement, Heroes of Horror.
Taint rules are introduced, as you gain Taint you begin to grow physical deformities like open sores, arthritis, cataracts, your eyes rolling out leaving only empty sockets with a glowing light in them, maggots wriggling underneath your skin, plus psychological effects like a nervous tick, a phobia, suddenly having an evil twin, becoming paranoid, and so on.
They can be used like SAN loss, but the best use is to have killing cause Taint. Everything you kill gives you a percent chance to gain a Taint point. Killing a baby humanoid would probably be 90%, killing a rust monster would be like 5%.
>>46495217
>Try to make it so that at some point they realize what they're doing is just committing atrocities in the name "goodness" and then make them fall.
That's pointless, if the players go that far they're already committed to playing an edgy inquisitor and don't have the creativity necessary for actual character development.
>>46488140
Only if you're playing in a shit setting.
>>46495193
This. I didn't need to beat the shit out of the neighborhood kids (just my brother), but parents today are a lot more soft-handed than they were for the previous generation. Twenty years ago (our childhood), causing a shitstorm in the grocery store was grounds for a belt to the ass, in public. Today? "He's just expressing his feelings." And if you try to tell the kid to knock it off? God help you.
Also, anyone who browses 4chan instead of being out there having a life could be classified as a failure.
>>46487463
>lawful
>goodspooky
>>46487463
>tfw our GM have long tossed alignments out
>tfw playing Orc paladin of not-Pelor, blessing people, helping villages and removing undead
>tfw the only orc baby encounter was when i converted the entire village to not-Pelor after we saved them from a chimera
What's your excuse to still having alignments, /tg/?
>>46495630
To start arguments on /tg/ obviously! Only an idiot uses alignments except for extreme examples like demons or angels. Even a fire-breathing, gold-hoarding dragon, adventurer-eating can be a good guy if he supports the Empire, pays his taxes, and regularly chips in at the local community center.
>>46495671
Funny thing is, the leader of a major empire in our setting was an ancient red dragon. He was a pretty good ruler too - dragons DO care about their hoard, after all.
>>46495630
You know what? I really can't think of a good reason to keep it around much less why it was a thing. As far as I can tell it was something added due to some fantasy novel having something like that with Order and Chaos (could've been bearable if they stuck with just these two) and a poorly thought out attempt to give people roleplaying guidelines.
But it's done more bad than good.
>nonsensical
>leads to dumb debates
>multiclassing restrictions
>class restrictions in general
>causes players to overcompensate in order to fit their alignment (which means being a dickbag with no sense self preservation if evil)
The only place it seems to work is Planescape stuff and of course there's alignment specific spells which is kind of cool I guess but not really worth everything else.
I haven't had the chance to play 5E yet but didn't it give alignments the feat treatment? As in it is acknowledged to exist for people who want that shit in their game still but that's it?
>>46493815
Being good doesn't mean being equally good.
My paladin is good, of course. But if he had to choose between saving a group of humans and an equally large group of another race, and not have time to save both, he'd always choose the humans.
It's a rule of conservation.
>>46495801
> I haven't had the chance to play 5E yet but didn't it give alignments the feat treatment? As in it is acknowledged to exist for people who want that shit in their game still but that's it?
Alignment still exists as something you can write on your sheet, but there's almost nothing mechanically that cares about it... I noticed one spell that cares (I forget which), but the official stance is "no mechanics to alignment", so I get the feeling that one just slipped by the editors.
>>46495801
>The only place it seems to work is Planescape stuff
Even Planescape benefits more from just having different philosophies, without alignment crap.You could also do mad science with mtg or numenera-esque "wheel", but that's, as i said, mad science.
>I haven't had the chance to play 5E yet but didn't it give alignments the feat treatment?
Not exactly what you said, but alignment as a feat could be actually a neat idea. Alignment isn't universal, but having it "binds" you to certain forces, allowing to tap into them. It even could handle "falling" - if you stray too much from those forces' agenda you no longer are aligned with them.
>>46487623
>Royal edicts no non-humans could be brought into the kingdom.
What about these cattle I came to sell? Or the horse that I rode in on? Or my dog that's following me?
>>46487463
I rape it.
Chaotic Evil!
>>46495871
They'll have to wait outside.
>>46495871
SAPIENT non-humans, you cheeky twat.
>What about these cattle I came to sell?
hassan, we've been throuth this already, you're no longer welcome in this kingdom, not after Camel Meltdown Incident.
>>46495888
> SAPIENT non-humans, you cheeky twat.
So orcs should be fine, then. Come on, man, make up your mind.
>>46495878
Now that's edgy! Does your character also use katana and have cool scars?
>>46495910
You can't bring in orcs for the same reason you can't bring in god damn boars and coyotes, jackass.
>>46495920
How did you know?
>>46495922
Are those goalposts heavy? You want some help moving them?
>>46495706
>He was a pretty good ruler too - dragons DO care about their hoard, after all
Now I want to play in campaign with greedy dragon who is really bad at spending money. He cares about his hoard but is very bad businessman at the same time.
>>46496475
Have an older Blue/Green (or Copper/Brass) dragon with a gambling addiction who spends most of his hoard in the very same game and brothel houses he owns as shape-shifted patrons. Gives him the opportunity to be a ridiculous ass AND observe his subjects in disguise.
>>46495920
No he usesanachronistic gunsbecause he's just that smart!
>>46487463
Easy, take him in and raise him to be a paladin. Give him a "sorry for murdering your real parents" note for his 18th birthday.
>>46492178
come at me
>>46492960
Probably, but - Here's the thing - we didn't force the change on them. The whole idea was that people would WANT to be changed.
How did we do it? Well, we insisted on humane treatment for the orcs. We set up camps, made sure they were well-fed and clean, had Paladins sweep the place to make sure there were no abuses.
And then we began to indoctrinate them. We told them that orcs are cursed, because their gods made them evil and twisted. But not to worry: If your heart is pure, you can transcend. You can become more, and live a pure, innocent life. (As a bird/fish/rabbit/whatever, but we universally did birds.)
Every few months, there would be a Festival of Ascension, where orcs would be transformed en masse. It was a privilege! You had to be on your best behavior, and the camp counsilor had to go "Yes, he's been sufficiently redeemed. He can Ascend now."
Can you see the beauty of this? We were teaching them to embrace their own annihilation. If any of them failed to transform, or transformed then changed back, we would welcome them back to the nearest camp, and tell them gently: "The path of ascension is not an easy one. It is good that you came back, so we can begin again. Not everyone makes it the first time, but we are here to guide your steps along the True Way."
Basically, we made them WANT it. We made them WANT to become mindless animals. And I don't think the DM cottoned on to how insidiously evil this was, because I always pitched it as a shamelessly good act. No hypocrisy, my Paladin actually fought racists who wanted to exterminate them, gave passionate speeches about how "Orcs are not *evil*. They are a misguided people, formed by a cruel god. But we do not have to treat them the same way! We can uplift them, give them new lives beyond the misery of their bodies! We can make them pure!"
>>46498216
And all the while, the demons and devils are either laughing their asses off or ripping their horns off in frustration.
>>46498656
Exactly. You know what the biggest uproar in the camps were? Bribery, because orcs were paying to BE THE FIRST IN LINE.
There was a riot, because the orcs wanted to BE CHANGED FIRST.
It's like if people actively fought to be gassed. Each time, the guards had to restore order, and there were complaints about "Why does the criteria for Ascension have to be so stringent? Can't we allow more of them to be transformed? Our God is a forgiving God, after all."
After a whole conclave was assembled, we eventually concluded that orc children were born free of original sin, and could be immediately ascended. However, we needed the consent of their parents, and at least three people to vouch for the character of their orc parents.
So this is how it feels like to be Double Hitler.
>>46488916
Sounds like liberals and sjw's
I wash my hands of it and bail. Or I look back at history and see how other Paladins dealt with it, I mean, Orcs are getting uppity all the time surely something like this has happened before. Then you turn the DM's moral dilemma against them because they have to make a judgement for another Paladin from ages past.
>>46498216
>>46498799
Holy shit, anon. Holy shit.
>3.cancer DMs have a boner for screwing over paladins
>being moral is wrong and bad and stupid
>lawful good can't just chose between good and law
>one act makes you fall mwahahaha
>I'm so clever
Someone screencap this mess, gotta be a new one for /tg/.
Murdering the child is certainly the Good thing to do, but probably not the Lawful one.
In the most common scenario, the child's entire family will be dead, so the kindest thing you can do is to kill it, sending it to its respective afterlife to be with its family for eternity.
>>46500132
What mess?
>>46500186
Double Hitler right here. >>46498799
I'd do it myself, but I'm using my phone.
>>46488115
>killing babies is evil
>killing orcs isn't evil
Thus killing orc babies is a neutral action.
>>46500347
It's actually Schrodinger's Fall, and the only way to know is to open the baby and observe the situation.
>>46500214
Why would someone screencap an episode of
>shit that never happened
>>46487537
Being an orc is illegal.
>>46487463
Kill anything you see in your path, let the gods sort it out, that's what a true Gigaxian Paladin should behave.
>>46487463
>lawful
Really?
REALLY!?
Babies are fucking lawful?
ARE THEY REALLY!?
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>46498216
> We didn't force it on them.
> We just lied and manipulated them, indoctrinating them into thinking it was their choice.
Yeah, no.
>>46492021
The orcs did help repel the BL in WC3.
>>46503924
At least they admitted that it was evil.
So, so, gloriously Evil.
>>46487550
And then the ecosystem broke and everyone starved yay.
>>46487623
This is a LN Knight, not a Paladin IMO
>>46492464
If you didn't kill everything with evil in its stat block, then you're bad at being a good guy desu.
>just needed a picture of a baby orc and two words to cause an alignment debate
>>46504188
We all know the drill, mate
>>46487463
cut its head of in the name of the Emperor!
>>46487463
When lawful good you'd obey the spirit of the law, not the writ- and only then it it's a good law. Fuck off lawful neutral shills
>>46491744
This.
>>46505641
cuck
>>46488791
>You're a shit player and I'm glad I'm not your DM.
Are one of those faggots that project lawful good morality on real life?
Because I'll most certainly DM that guy (>>46487492) and piss on your face for being a party pooper.
>>46487776
>Every race has an original sin
YHWH, don't you have some incest, child rape, and murder to be condoning, instead of shitting up an already pretty awful thread?
>>46508434
>implying YHWH can't multitask while shitposting
>>46493715
>#NOTALLORCS
Shut the fuck up retard
>>46495193
>helping raise your neighbor's kids
You know what a cuck actually is, right?
Can't spell lawful without AWFUL
>>46506357
Go for it, shitbag, you two faggots deserve one another.
>>46504008
How many doves does one need to do that?
>>46510478
I kind of want to see a modern fantasy setting like this. I don't just mean like the last 20 years-ish modern. I mean 2010s modern and all its identity politics bullshit.
Orcs, dwarves, and elves using twitter. Can you imagine??
Watch out, that baby's got a gun! SELF-DEFENSE!
>>46487584
>More than three points
You may no longer be 14, but you are still retardad.
>>46493323
No Gygax said that exterminating an entire village could still be LG.
>>46493443
Yup.
Leave it to an era of feminized men who've never experienced conflict to get all wobbly-kneed at the idea of violence being committed for the sake of good.
>>46518348
First of all, thanks for that image. It was really good to read.
Second, I am a flawed DM at best, but I think if there is one thing I haven't failed at is the distinction between good and evil, and the grey zone in between, and so do my players.
A Lawful Good Paladin in my world would depose an evil tyrant and help create a new ruling council, then would admit publicly his betrayal and go in exile. But at least, he would know that the citizens of that realm are not suffering anymore.
A Chaotic Evil Barbarian once went and killed a famous retired swordmaster because he needed a new sword and he was voiced to have a legendary artifact. He then saw the orphaned daughter of the warrior, so he decided to give her the sword, some food and he told her
"Grow and become strong. Then come kill me, if you'll still want revenge."She did. It was a nice ending to the campaign.
>>46510583
>You know what a cuck actually is, right?
Do you? I mean the actual meaning of the word not the 4chan meaning of "someone, possibly of another race is having sex with a woman that I know in my vague proximity".
>>46493749
>shifty halflings
That's just a distraction from the Wizard Question. Who do you think brought them here?
Who else is going to move into an Orc neighborhood and kill the locals, and sell alchemical herbs on the kingsroad?
>>46493622
I keep telling my Traveller referee that, but he still doesn't let us nuke low-tech worlds for not giving up their gold.
