There are no more trail rations available for five hundred miles. There is only cheese.
What is best to take?
All of them.
Smoked cheddar.
Cheez Whiz. I feel like it'll make you less painfully constipated.
Parmesan cheese. Accept no substitutes for the king of cheeses.
Eat monsters you kill on the way, duh.
![5aU40u9[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/7bgMG0n.jpg "5aU40u9[1].jpg")
>>46431137
The right answer.
With the exception of >>46431149.
Maybe double up on the goats cheese to spread it on other cheeses.
>>46431131
Hard cheeses.
No blue.
As much as I love blue, I don't want to go attracting monsters.
>>46431137
This is the only true answer, with Brie being the second.
>>46431131
Goat cheese, it'll be easy on the stomach at least
>>46431264
>Land whale wearing a dress in a wheelchair
>Can practically see the fat flab and double/triple chin
>Eating a fucking block of cheese
>Still has Cheez-Its in the back
I am absolutely disgusted the way such people will go on the path of bodily self-destruction. You ain't doing anyone a favor by being so fat you suck you family's money dry on health care and food.
What is this levitating scribe eating?
>>46431966
It looks like he's just wearing the pants in front of his legs.
>>46431966
Is that Kevin Smith?
>>46431264
Whilst I in no way condone this kind of shit, I have to admit I once ate an entire 200g block of Vintage Cheddar.
Pregnancy cravings are fucking strange.
>>46431131
Laxatives.
Nigga, camembert is the fucking best.
>Americans
>Eating blocks of cheese
>b-but cheese makes you constipated!
You guys have no idea how to eat.
>>46431131
You'd want to look at brined cheeses, cheeses with rinds and dry hard cheese. All of these will keep for a good while if they're stored well and stay dry.
Omelette du fromage
>>46431131
Smoked gouda.
>>46431174
Oh you mean the cheese that was literally designed to be a Pecorino Romano for plebs and morons?
>>46431264
>>46431966
Is this a thing in the US? People just eat entire blocks of cheese?
>>46435530
It's a thing among obese land-whales.
>>46431131
Hard cheeses, you don't want something that'll go bad on you and soft cheeses require refrigeration or they'll go pretty quickly. Ideally something waxed or with a tough rind around it to seal it in.
And when I say hard, I mean you're going to need +1 kitchen knives to get through it, and heat it up over a campfire on a piece of toasted hardtack to soften it up for eating.
>>46435617
>toasting hardtack
Unless you're dunking that in stew you're in for a bad time
>>46435530
It's a white people thing.
Non-Ethnic American whites in most of the USA, barring coastal left-wing places don't eat anything except like candy, don't drink anything except coca-cola, and otherwise just guzzle cheese and chicken strips and shit.
>>46435792
No, it's a poor person thing. I'm sure you understand, Jaquan.
>>46435530
It's a poor person thing. Blacks and whites who are poor do this, while people lower-middle-class or above gag at the idea.
Hell, I know Latinos who drink coffee creamer straight.
>>46435741
Probably a better idea. Boil water, add soup bones or something, dunk hardtack, add cheese.
>>46435792
>Dindus actually believe this.
White rural Texan here. You are full of shit. My family doesn't even drink soda, and we eat a balanced diet. Back in Highschool, we normally made fun of fatties.
>>46432065
>Pregnancy cravings are fucking strange.
Yeah. especially on guys.
>>46435853
>Its a poor person thing
How the hell did that come about? I can't imagine eating an entire block of cheese on the regular is cheap.
>>46435910
I think he means he's craving a pregnancy. Or he has a pregnant chick fetish. With cheese.
>>46431214
>Muensters
>>46436025
You can get really cheap cheese in America.
It would also be insanely filling.
>>46436051
strange, most of my fetishes go better with chocolate.
>>46436025
In the 80's and 90's it used to be that anyone on welfare, food stamps, or social security disability would get these government food packages for free/cheap. The government also gave the stuff to soup kitchens, charity organizations, and churches to distribute.
One of the ubiquitous items was what was referred to by most as "Government Cheese", and was basically a giant block of the lowest quality velveeta analogue you can imagine.
American cheese has like zero dairy in it, man. It ain't that expensive.
>>46435898
Guy who posted it. I'm Tejano as well. Texans don't count, because while we love our cheese, we're not midwest/deep south trash that exist off welfare, for the most part.
Seriously though.
FUCK American cheese.
>>46436025
American sharp cheddar, which is somehow bright orange because it's processed as fuck (also tastes terrible), is cheap as fuck.
Like $3-$5 per block of that size.
Also, it's not a poor American thing. It's a fat and poor American thing.
These fucks are so addicted to lard that they need to fill the time between their 4,000 cal meals with food and cheese is rich and filling as fuck.
>>46436025
Food is cheap. A block of cheese like that is probably between $5-10 USD depending on the quality.
>>46436110
I'm from the Old South and I can safely say it gets fat in the Deep South.
Never had any reason to go to the Midwest though.
>>46436025
Europoor speaking, you can get cheese here for as low as 3.5 Euro per kilo. We're talking 30% Edam made industrially ("Tesco quality"), so it doesn't taste much, but for comparison bread costs like 2.5 per kilo and potatoes are only a little bit cheaper.
>>46435853
>implying black people can digest dairy
>>46436150
Midwest is literally the culture of the south without the accent and it's racism is more subdued.
I somehow hate them more, because they have this mentality of always comparing themselves to others and trying to make themselves feel better than you.
Listen, if you were really great, why are you in the midwest?
>>46436201
>implying there's any actual milk in the cheapest kind of cheese
next time you'll be telling us there's actual meat in the cheapest kind of sausage
>>46436207
Generalization of 70% of america, the post.
>>46436143
I remember being convinced as a child that Americans must have amazing cheese because it all has such bold colors.
Obviously I was disappointed.
>>46436207
>racism is more subdued
If by that you mean "I have never seen a black person to be racist towards. Also, where is Mexico?", then I mean sure, that counts, I guess.
>>46436143
>eating processed cheese
>>46436222
Pig anus is still meat.
Anus meat, but meat nonetheless.
>>46436201
They really can't, I didn't realize til recently that lactose intolerance was the rule and not the exception.
South East Asians, Africans and American Indians of all varieties (up to 70% of the earths genetic population) can't do dairy in adulthood.
>>46436249
>replying to a post describing an undesirable action as undesirable
>"I would never do that!"
>>46436301
>can't find that it exists at all disgusting
>>46436272
I'm glad I saved this adorable map.
>>46436233
Big food is probably the greatest evil to ever exist.
What frustrates me most is that everybody's palates are so shit now that they look at variety as some strange evil, meanwhile chugging corn syrup.
>>46436259
>Talking about eating pig anus, like it's gross.
I bet you don't like sweet breads, head meat or tripe either. Fucking closed minded cunt.
>>46436207
>why are you in the midwest?
my crippling ego problems have prevented me from working up the willpower to leave
Assuming only one/a few?
A harder cheese, they don't go bad as easily. You stick it in a pot and go swiss army with that shit.
Melt at night in the pot and eet it with slain monsters. When you take it off the flames it will re harden and you don't have to pack it up again.
>>46436233
Anatto is a weird fuckin' thing. Basically, at some point, our lower and middle classes got it into their heads that cheese was supposed to be orange, so now they won't fucking buy the stuff if it isn't either brightly dyed or marketed as fancy in some way. Started in Britain, by the way.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annatto#Cheeses
>>46436201
>>46436272
There is no lactose in dairy products like cheese, yogurt, kefir and so on.
Thats why humans started to make these things in the first place, because first ido-europeans were also lactose intolerant. Bacteria eat all the sugar and leave the fat and proteins.
Blacks and indians and so on just cant drink milk or cream. Cheese is a-ok
>>46436662
>There is no lactose in dairy products like cheese, yogurt, kefir and so on.
It depends on the cheese. Yogurt and kefir, yes, there's negligible lactose because of bacterial action, but most cheeses don't have that going for them. You have to realize, cheese isn't necessarily fermented - it's curdling that's the key thing. How much lactose remains in the product is dependent on the rest of the process, most importantly how thoroughly whey is drained.
Hard, aged cheeses like parmesan are fine, but if you're lactose intolerant and eat a bowl of cottage cheese, or even a fresh cheese like mozzarella, you'll have some problems. And stay the fuck away from ricotta, since it's made directly from whey and still has all the sugar in it (which is why it's so easily paired with sweet things).
>>46433059
That feature of cheese has actually come in handy, though.
>>46436512
No? I fucking love offal.
>>46436662
>implying that American 'Cheese' is processed by bacteria.
Kraft and shit literally put milk into their cheese as a postprocessing step, thus loading their shit back up with lactose, and advertise it as a healthy dairy option, thus defeating the purpose of cheesemaking.
>>46436567
Big fish, small pond?
>>46436776
No, I just spend too much time thinking about how great I am to go to the trouble of figuring out a concrete plan for getting out of here that won't leave me or my family in financial ruin.
>>46436812
Know this, a $100,000 home in Kansas is $750,000 literally anywhere else.
If you already have children, you fucked up and are in that trap until you're dead. Enjoy corn, obesity and ignorance forever. Hopefully your ghost doesn't get shackled to the land of lard as well.
>>46436812
> I just spend too much time thinking about how great I am to go to the trouble of figuring out a concrete plan for getting out of here
So big fish, small pond.
>>46436880
Fortunately, no kids. It's siblings and parents, from whom I had to borrow money for college, that are the chains keeping me here. Honestly I just need to get off my ass long enough to find a job somewhere else.
More importantly, though, cheese is fucking delicious when it's real cheese and enjoyed in moderation. Fucking Velveeta or whatever has exactly two use cases - macaroni, and salsa, and even in those you need to be so fucking lazy that you can't be assed to make a proper sauce yourself.
>>46435530
Only for ludicrously fat people, but they all seem to do it for some reason.
>>46436747
Well, I've learned something today, thanks.
>>46436880
Dude a home in Nebraska is about 10k for 3 floors and too many fucking rooms.
Prices are low where no one wants to live.
>>46436110
You mean 60s and 70s. It was the effect of William Proxmire and the Wisconsin dairy lobby.
Basically, Wisconsin was (and is) a major center of leftism in the united States. It had considerable influence. So in addition to price supports, subsidies, etc, the federal government bought large amounts of milk to increase the profits of the dairy farmers, which got turned into cheese so it wouldn't spoil. The original idea was to ship the cheese to developing nations as foreign aid. But then the dairy lobby objected that that would flood the market and depress the world price of cheese. And destroying it would have been a waste, right? So they spent millions of dollars storing it in vast warehouses instead, as a "strategic reserve". A huge ridiculous stockpile that grew year after year.
So then Reagan gets elected. He doesn't care what promises the Democrat politicians made to their donors. He just sees the USA dumping millions of dollars into this stupid stockpile of shitty cheese. All paid for by taxpayers so they can have the privilege of paying twice as much for dairy products.
So he started giving it away to welfare recipients. For free. Eventually the supply ran out and he ended the program.
Fun fact: when Reagan ran for re-election in 1984, he carried Wisconsin, too.
Senator Proxmire is usually better known for being a fierce opponent of the space program because he opposed government waste. He was the one who insisted that the plans and tooling to build the Saturn rocket, to ensure that the wasteful moon program couldn't be restarted. He called the whole thing a golden fleece.
Government cheese was pretty awful, but it did have a high milk content. That was the point.
>>46435853
>It's a poor person thing
This >>46431966 is definitely not a poor guy though.
>>46435372
Well, it can double as a brick.
>US
>cheese
Its more like a chunk of cheese flavored chemical sludge.
>>46437933
i dont think you understand the process of making cheese in any way, brick cheese is created in the same way as a cheese wheel, just in a different shape.
Cheddar is for people who have never tried any other kind of cheese. Camembert master race.
>>46436207
>why are you in the midwest
I'm here for the wine.
>>46431131
>Edam ages and travels well, and does not spoil; it only hardens. These qualities (among others) made it the world's most popular cheese between the 14th and 18th centuries, both at sea and in remote colonies.
Plus it's pretty dang good.
>>46432053
Yeah, though he's lost a lot of weight lately. The cheese is, obviously, shooped in.
>>46435530
look at the arm, its a photoshop
I work in Cheese Packing.
I enjoy this thread
>>46437887
Kevin Smith grew up in a pretty poor household, and was poor until he made Clerks.
>>46438985
Redbank and Asbury Park are not poor. Lower middle class, maybe. Parts of them. Asbury Park and Freehold are actually pretty high-income.
Even smith doesn't claim he came out of the projects or some such shit. He grew up in a house, had three meals a day and a college education.
>>46434740
Mah brethren.
>>46439207
Not struggle for food poor, more works in a convenience store while up to your eyeballs in debt poor.
In the grim darkness of the far future, there is only cheese.
