Khorne has started to grow bored of sapient slaughter. As such, he summons 200 cassowaries and 200 honey badgers to an arena for a fight to the death.
Who wins?
>>46105155
khorne does.
>>46105155
the last beast standing
>>46105155
Honeybadgers. They're smaller, quicker, and the cassowaries would have a hard time getting down that low.
>>46105155
I think the slaughter never ends.
>>46105155
they eyes each other for a minutes then give the "hell yeah motherfucker" face and goes their way, they don't have to fight each other and neither give a fuck to Khorne.
That or they turn on Khorne.
>>46105155
Are you dumb, OP? Cassowary's only/deadliest attack is the cutting foot talons. Honey Badger is not only ridiculously OP in almost all ways, but its strong, thick coat of fur surrounding its very small body hidden inside it is already a hard counter to the cassowary.
The only thing the cassowary can do is spam jump and hope the honey badger can't get to its neck. Otherwise it has to pray it can kick the honey badger right in the eyes and hope the honey badger doesn't go ham and tear its legs off.
>>46105155
Which breeds fastest?
>>46105155
The honey badgers try to kill each other and the cassowaries try to kill the honey badgers.
>>46105273
A kick to the badger's head would be deadly but I doubt these birds would be aiming for it; or would be able to hit them easily.
>>46105155
They ally with one another and spill the blood of the audience.
>>46105387
Are honey badgers weak to concussive hits? I didn't know that. I figured "it's a fucking honey badger it probably has titanium for bones and race car suspension springs for a neck".
>>46105273
That's it. I'm sick of all this "Masterwork Bird Talon" bullshit that's going on in the d20 system right now. Cassowaries deserve much better than that. Much, much better than that.
I should know what I'm talking about. I myself commissioned a genuine Cassowary from Australia for 5,000 Australian dollars (that's about $10^37) and have been practicing with it for almost 2 years now. It can even cut through solid steel with its talons
The Australian Environment spends years working on a single Cassowary and fold the claws up to a million times to produce the finest birds known to mankind.
Cassowaries are thrice as sharp as katana swords and thrice as hard for that matter too. Anything a nodachi can cut through, a cassowary can cut through better. I'm pretty sure a cassowary could easily bisect a knight wearing full plate with a simple vertical slash.
Ever wonder why medieval Europe never bothered conquering New Guinea? That's right, they were too scared to fight the flightless birds and their claws of destruction. Even in the Emu War, Australian soldiers targeted the Cassowaries first because their killing power was feared and respected.
>>46105546
Underrated post!
Go, go flightless bird spam!
Chickens of Death! Are next.
Birds have already won a war against the human race, I'm giving this to them
>>46105700
Australians aren't human.
>>46105700
That Emu War is inaccurate.
>>46105233
they dont have to get down that low
one of their most powerful weapons is their talons
>>46105456
Honey badgers are insanely brutal for how small they are, like other varieties of badger. They regularly fight off animals much larger than them, just by being so violent and hate-filled that starving, desperate predators like lions would rather fuck off than try to eat them.
>le Honey Badger don't give a shit XDDDDDDD
Even a Dog could kill a Honey Badger.
>>46106011
Meanwhile the cassowary is actually relatively tame, despite its reputation. Oh, they'll disembowel a man for fucking with them, but they don't seek out confrontation like the honey badger does.
>>46105180
Underrated post
All Honey Badger has is tough skin and bluff tactics. Bluff Tactics won't work in a setting where they are forced to fight. Cassowaries win with mild difficulty.
>>46106123
Well, yes, many things can kill many other things.
Most things do not try to kill honey badgers because they are fucking mental and will fuck you up in the process of dying.
Killing things is easy, not getting hurt in the process is the hard part.
>>46105155
While Honey Badgers are tough and hard to kill they don't actually have a particularly fearsome attack. They can bite and claw but they aren't strong enough to really inflict particularly large wounds on anything larger than they are. Cassowaries are much larger and have a pretty good attack for their size.
However Cassowaries are also territorial, though that relates to food, if there isn't any food for them to defend they may not care. As where the Honey Badgers aren't actually aggressive unless something is either food, or trying to attack them. So it's entirely possible that the end result is 400 animals milling about trying to figure out how to escape the arena.
>>46105546
>not dollaridoos
>>46105273
This Honey Badger meme needs to die. Honey Badgers aren't the little tanks everyone thinks them to be, in fact they're regularly preyed upon by Golden Eagles even upon reaching adulthood. It's pretty safe to say that if an above average sized bird of prey can send one of these things running then a man sized bird spawned from mother nature's thunderdome can do that and then some. That leathery hide doesn't count for jack shit when it's pitted against a six inch long, inch or two thick talon attached to one of the strongest legs in the animal kingdom. Hell, even if the cassowary didn't penetrate something immediately vital it'd still lacerate flesh and break bones. The cassowary could even snap the badger's neck if it connected with a head kick.
>>46107545
>in fact they're regularly preyed upon by Golden Eagles even upon reaching adulthood
TOO BAD CASSOWARIES CANT RETREAT STRAIGHT UP INTO THE CLOUDS YOU DUMB NIGGER
EVEN FUCKING LIONS CANT TAKE THEM ON THE GROUND
I'm going to capture one of each and put them in a cage and see what happens.
>local man slain by freak cassowary/honey badger attack
>>46106517
>So it's entirely possible that the end result is 400 animals milling about trying to figure out how to escape the arena.
And once they found out there's this one horned dude that puts them in there
>>46107545
1: Cassoaries don't fly.
2: They are solitary fucking birds that attack anything even their own kind.
3: Honey badgers respect each other's space.
4: Honey badgers swoop in when cassoaries are busy disembowling each other, and eat out their balls.
>>46105155
I think this begs a more important question.
How the hell did Khorne get 200 honey badgers without losing every appendage he has?
Also, how the hell did he get 200 Cassowaries without getting killed by them and literally anything else in Austrailia? It rains SPIDERS there.
>tfw you find animals genuinely interesting but people only pay attention to them because dank leddit memes
>>46109086
We just have to tough it out the rest of you guys are sissys if you cant handle a few spiders
>>46109115
lurk /an/ fagit
>>46107545
Get rekt
>>46105155
Is Cassowary vs Honey Badger becoming the new Knight vs Samurai argument?
>>46105155
Here's a better match-up.
50 Wolverines vs. 100 Cassowaries.
>>46105700
The Battle for Brisbane is wrong. there were hundreds of Americans injured and allegedly several were killed but massive media blackouts and America not even reporting about it means that few details are actually known by the public at large.
20,000 Wolverines vs 20,000 Honey Badgers vs 20,000 Tasmanian Devils
>>46110167
Wolverines win, hands down.
![911px-Taz-Looney_Tunes.svg[1].png](https://i.imgur.com/C64F7IW.png "911px-Taz-Looney_Tunes.svg[1].png")
Time for the real battle
Looney Toons Tasmanian Devil versus 40k
>>46109072
Birds don't have balls.
>>46105155
Honey badger. The cassowary's can disembowel a human, but the honey badgers skin might as well be made of steel.
>>46110703
Then clearly they're not even a contender in this fight.
Huge balls vs. no balls? I mean come on.
>>46110167
The tassy devils are too busy giving each other cancer via infighting, just like /b/.
Because in Australia our animals figured out how to shitpost through biting each other.
>>46105735
>10k rounds
>dignity
>>46109086
Well Tzeentch did it one day as a gift for Khorne, which is really a prank.
But when Khorne took interest in them fighting each other... it became just as planned.
>>46105155
Ends in sex
>>46110649
Looney Toons Tas for sure. Being powered by cartoon logic trumps the grim dorkness ensures he can be shot; stabbed, blown up, or worse and just be scuffed up at worse and still be a menace.
>>46105700
>>46105735
Australians used to nuclear retaliation on the Emu capital and ended the Emu civilization for good now there just scattered flocks
>>46109086
khorne was positively delighted at the prospect of fighting something that gave him a challenge.
>>46105180
this. Khorne cares not from whence the blood flows
>>46109086
My shower head released spiders instead of water the other day.
Needless to say I was somewhat miffed.
>>46111924
Aussie propaganda.. We all know that the Emu Federation is still alive today.
>>46112915
they blew up their nesting ground they are disorganized and have few numbers
>>46105155
I do.
Any time the world has 400 monsters fighting each other instead of going after me is a win in my book.
>>46109086
I'm fairly certain that there are at least three species of spiders in that picture that should be murdering the hell out of each other and the unaffiliated spiders.
>>46113599
How can you be so sure? I'm curious now.
>>46113632
Spiders, unless they are excessively communal in nature. Don't like competition, and cannibalism is very prevalent in almost every species.
Hell, there are spiders evolved for doing nothing BUT eating other spiders.
The only possible reason for so many of those spiders to be so close together, unless it's a communal species with rather extreme sexual dimorphism, which isn't uncommon, is mutual destruction, the "You eat me, all these other fucks are going to eat you while you are distracted." kinda thing.
>>46113676
perhaps there's so many bugs they don't have any need to kill each other what I'm wondering is why those weapons haven't been put to the torch
>>46113779
Did you mean vehicles anon?
Anyway, Spiders are crabs are the closest things with a brain to a biological robot there are, they may well not be eating each other because of the overabundance of other insects falling into the web, but the moment the surplus fades...
>>46113062
Revenge will be quick and deadly
