Can anyone briefly explain Warhammer 40K to me, please?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUkyAt6CJgU
>>45975511
Sci fi and fantasy cliches fight while power metal plays in the background.
>>45975511
>Image
That's Warhammer. The fantasy game that came before Warhammer 40k the Science Fiction.
Kind of related (Chaos faction) otherwise not.
>>45975511
>>45975575
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UID6LEzvRRo
Who needs exposition? In the grim darkness of the 41st millennium, THERE IS ONLY WAR
>>45975511
Science fiction, Gothic fantasy, stupidity, power metal andfunall had a big orgy and their spawn was 40k.
>>45975626
Don't forget pulp comics.
>>45975511
>Can anyone briefly explain Warhammer 40K to me, please?
autism
Originally Warhammer Fantasy in SPACE. Also, it used to be a parody. Then it got more grim&dark.
How about this, for the entire central narrative of the universe in less than 90 seconds:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-MeVxKZBOfM
And for an extended mostly-accurrate history lesson by the emperor himself, two more videos:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FyeoBm5QFnA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UUAAM1WE3Ng
>>45975700
>implying autism is unique to 40k
>implying most hobbies and 100% of video games and traditional games aren't just autism in different flavors or forms
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-jBnE3LYo4
>>45975511
80s British nerds threw everything cool into a light hearted setting generic enough for them to use all their sci-fi miniatures in a wargame. Later nerds then got over-run by business men and the next generation of nerds took everything far too seriously.
>>45975511
WAR
>>45975511
In the grimdark grimdark of the grimdark grimdark, there is only grimdark.
>>45975511
When empires collapse, they generally take a few generations to do it.
Most of the factions are empires so big that they've meen collapsing for tens of millenia.
Beyond that, see >>45975739 and >>45975970
Is this the 40k General, now?
>>45975970
>into a light hearted setting
please actually read rogue trader
it is not light hearted
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4FcxJ7hPEj0
>>45975511
Everybody hates everybody so they murder the shit out of each other in spess
>>45975511
Bible, with guns.
>>45975511
about 38,000 years into the future;
>Mankind built an empire among the stars
>Skynet happened
>John Conner won and destroyed pretty much everything
>Tech left over is worshiped out of ignorance and the remains of the galaxy spanning empire is administered with pen and paper - cause fuck AI
>The perfect human was born and played god with gene therapy (think MGS with Big Boss, Solid/Liquid & the Genome Soldiers)
>He got done in by Liquid and sits in a retirement home/lighthouse and is worshiped as a god
>Foxhound has escaped into hell and is doing stupid evil shit because daddy issues
>Mushrooms gained sentience and are on a massive pub crawl/crusade across the galaxy because why not
>Elves are dicks. Dicks IN SPACE!
>Communism is alive and well
>The borg are fucking around, if they were ruled by Imhotep from the Mummy movies
>H. R. Giger should sue Games Workshop
>Nobody gets along
Think that covers most of it
>>45975511
>>45975511
Emperor create a galactic wide rock n roll tour once
Then Horus call a quit and ruin everything
Now all we got are shitty grimdark drama concert
>>45982563
Can anyone briefly explain MGS to me, please?
>>45982985
>can anyone briefly explain MGS
No.
>>45983217
Correct answer
>>45975511
>Can anyone briefly explain Warhammer 40K to me, please?
A wild eclectic of space opera and sci-fi, both pulp and classic, with most of themes centered around warfare and conflict. Lore written with some broad strokes, allowing for multiple interpretations of shit. Tone easily shifts from "Brutal Power Metal Fun and Adventure" to "Lovecraftian Horror" according to one's needsso don't liesten to anyone saying "Wah 40k used to be lighthearted fun but then grimdork ruined it" or "40k was always grimdork RTfags are just imagining things" - 40k was always one or another kind of both
It's rather awesome for both simplistic blood-violance escapism and more developed kind of shit with lots of different flavours, as lots of POVs and perspectives allowed within the setting give you a plenty of leeway about how you want to present shit.
It's basically the best and most developed setting for any things War in Space among the popular ones, honestly.
>>45975511
Dune, the Foundation series, Judge Dredd, and Paradise Lost mashed together, seasoned with bits every other action and sci-fi story ever written, painted black, and with extra spikes and skulls glued on everywhere.
>>45975511
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-jBnE3LYo4
>>45983312
This man tried once.
>https://youtu.be/c7alPXhmmPo
So, we've got this toy company, and they come up with this great idea that the cheapest form of advertisement is getting your fans to do the work for you. So, they start cooking up the perfect model to execute that plan.
To start, they decide to focus on a group that has a ton of money to burn: Semi-educated males with little to no interest in women. When I say semi-educated, I mean smart enough to read but that's about it, so that they have secure jobs but the inability to make good financial decisions like saving or investments. When I say little to no interest in women, I mean little to no ability in dating them and never spending money on things like nice clothes or deodorant. They wanted the most obnoxious, the least self-aware, the most mindless group of manchildren they could get their hands on.
So, they cook up a setting that's basically a mish-mash of the type of pulp fiction which that demographic was interested in, all cobbled together in a nonsensical manner with the only rationale behind any of it being "these factions need to fight." With that backdrop in place, they put their most important strategy into play: Overcharging for their toys.
It was quite brilliant, because after getting only a handful of manchildren to spend the better part of their meager paycheck on toys, these manchildren had fallen into the hole that is the self-perpetuating sunk-hole fallacy. Armed with slogans and the myth that their universe is more powerful than any other universe, they act like a disease, infecting the war-game community by finding like-minded simpletons who also had upwards of $500 to throw down on a single army all for a game that was awkward and boring to play. After that investment, the poor fool would have to figure out how to justify the purchase, and would end up deciding to make the game a part of their lifestyle, engaging in meaningless debates over the nonsensical lore and proselytizing it at every opportunity.
That's 40k in a nutshell.
>>45983929
But most of the lorefags and roleplayers don't even buy miniatures. How's that supposed to work?
>>45983929
>>45975511
It used to be good, then it got worse. Only thing that keeps us going is nostalgia.
>>45984094
Charge full price for books that are written by people who barely qualify as authors or game designers. You can overcharge anything.
And the lore/role fags are just a later symptom of the larger disease. Expecting 40k to be contained in one market is kind of like expecting a person with a bad liver to not have any other health issues.
All in all, it's a beautiful little model, and the only problem with it is that the fans won't ever stop being obnoxious since they'll never be able to accept that what they "love" is really an incomparably stupid trap specifically designed for people as mindless as themselves. It's that kind of trap that is made specifically for the kind of people who lack the mental facilities to even recognize how fucked they are.
>>45975511
Brown sugar pop tarts have no nutritional or gastronomic value, but they are so damn tasty.
Boom, 40k.
>>45984268
>but they are so damn tasty.
Only if you have shit taste.
Boom, 40k.
>>45982985
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sO2WIFTm7n4
>>45984287
Look, I get that you're a connoisseur of both ttrpgs and pop tarts, but that is a really dumb meme.
I basically amounts to "STOP LIKING THINGS I DON'T LIKE! I MEAN IT!"
>>45984457
>STOP LIKING THINGS I DON'T LIKE!
Congrats, whatever point you were trying to make has fallen apart, thanks to you trying to resurrect that dumb meme.
People can have shit taste, and arguing against that is basically just trying, desperately trying, to excuse any and all opinions, regardless of how bad they are. That's an impossible position to argue from, so I'm going to call you out on it for trying so hard to hypocritically dismiss someone else's opinion because it doesn't match your own.
You like 40k? Great. I think you're an idiot for doing so. You might think I'm an idiot, but that doesn't stop me from having my opinion about you.
>>45984536
>People can have shit taste
That much is true.
>arguing against that is basically just trying, desperately trying, to excuse any and all opinions, regardless of how bad they are
Certainly! Now, if only you could refrain from thinking in absolutes, for while there are certainly true undisputable masterpieces and AWFULLY AWFULLY SHIT creatins, it it is quite difficult to establish what makes shit taste. And I'm fairly certain that 40k is not stupid, lazy, bland, shallow or biased enough to staple anyone liking it as a shiteater. You need quite a narrow experience with fiction to see 40k as the absolute shit-tier.
>>45984604
> And I'm fairly certain that 40k is not stupid, lazy, bland, shallow or biased enough to staple anyone liking it as a shiteater.
And, you are wrong. Hopelessly wrong, and your homolove for men wearing tincan armor is blinding you from the truth.
You can't be reasoned with or argued with, because you are too dumb to even reach the base level of casual discourse, so all that's left is to call you an idiot.
Seriously, you want me to take you seriously when you worship a series where Orks have a collective psychic energy that makes their belief in painting things red to make them go faster actually true.
>>45984665
Dude.
Chill.
>>45984665
>And, you are wrong
No u
>You can't be reasoned with or argued with
But I can be. You are simply not providing me with anything aside from ad hominem, and I don't feel like reflecting on those.
> Seriously, you want me to take you seriously
Semi-seriously will do.
>you worship
Wat? Grow up.
>where Orks have a collective psychic energy that makes their belief in painting things red to make them go faster actually true
For once - iot's not "actually true", it's just a thing that orks thmselves believe. But more importantly - said setting has a fundmental rule of flexibility of phusical laws under the will of a specifically gifted individuals or collectives. In such context, Red Unz Go Fasta can be seen as orkish way of (backwards) interpreting the Doppler effect for light and possibly believing it into existance. Whimsical and giggly? Yes. Stupid? No.
>>45975511
>>45984809
>>45983929
>>45984739
There's variations of stupid. There's the ordinary lack of information, then there's the impressive kind of stupid where you mess around with information until you produce an idea even dumber than admitting you don't have an answer.
It is literally dumber than dumb.
>>45983929
>>45984237
Man, y'know, if you don't like something, just discard it and keep walking.
No need to engage in full autism.
>>45985062
>the impressive kind of stupid where you mess around with information until you produce an idea even dumber
Where do you think you are?
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PXaEUwAZSc
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wP8C-xZeFPY
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nwh1qDjEMic
I've always wanted to get into Warhammer, but financially that wasn't possible kek.
I've made it my goal to put away a bit of money every month (now that I have a decent job) so that I can play before I'm 30.
Are there any books to read, like works of fiction?
For n00bz?
40k seems pretty fucking cool.
>>45975613
This was so much better than the shit Blizzard was pumping out at the time.
>>45985131
I understand that's the modus operandi for some people here, but it's about time that we dispel the myth that people slinging bad ideas at each other and constructing a towering golem of ineptitude counts as constructive effort to be proud of.
/tg/ needs to work smarter, not harder, and that means developing a sense of style that isn't "melt all the crayons together, stir them until you get a shit-colored sludge, pour it all on a piece of paper, and call yourself the next da Vinci."
>>45982824
1200 dead slave per jump? how does the ship holds so much people?
>>45984665
>homolove for men wearing tincan armor
Nice projection you got there faggot
>>45985638
>trusting anything a tripfag posts
The image confuses Navigators with Astropaths. And that's not a succesful jump. It's a jump that went horribly wrong, but somehow Daemons didn't kill everyone on board.
The worst thing to happen on a succesful Warp jump is that some people get nightmares during transit.
>>45981716
Inspector Obiwan Sherlock Clouseau.
>>45982985
We actually can't.
2000 AD, Dune, and Warhammer Fantasy had themselves a flipper baby, then proceeded to bolt everything they could steal from science fiction properties on this baby, while losing everything that made all of those properties novel or interesting (except Warhammer fantasy, it never had either).
>>45984536
What the hell, man?
>>45982824
>8/10ths of the crew is dead
But that's wrong, Anon. Life may be cheap in the Imperium, but they'd look for another means of FTL if casualties were commonly that high.
>>45984536
That's literally what you said, though. It wasn't "It's shit, and here's why.", it was "Anyone who likes it has shit taste because I dislike it."
Eldars and Orks, are there any ways of me learning the Warhammer way online - through websites and books?
Something for a complete beginner?
I need an escape from life and I've finally got the balls to face 40K.
Please help - I'm alone at home with no friends or family.
>>45986607
How are you going to play without an opponent?
>>45986665
I'll find someone - can I not play alone in the mean time (play as both parties to practice) ?
More importantly where do I begin to learn more about 40K (online for the time being - still saving cash)?
I have no experience, I only admired the rich kids in my school that used to play this over 15 years ago.
>>45985488
>hoping to 'enlighten' tg as some sort of moral artistic project by ranting about shit they like
there's so much head up ass here its hard to explain
>>45985488
Oh yes, enlightened one, please teach us how we are engaging in "bad wrong fun", and only by liking things you like can we be saved from the horrors of having fun in the wrong way.
Fuck off faggot. You're immature, you're the epitome of "that guy who thinks he's better than everyone else", and you're probably a loser in real life. Your favorite setting is shit, your favorite game is shit and worse than AoS, you're a shit painter, you suck at everything and your waifu a shitsee, I can be an asshole about what people like too
It's Christmas Morning. There is a stocking tacked to the mantle of your fireplace. Inside the stocking is a poisonous viper.
You know this because you are 400 years old, and every time you've gotten a stocking, there has been a poisonous viper inside.
Sometimes the viper bites you and you barely survive.
Sometimes you smash the stocking on the ground without opening it, only to hear the tinkling of breaking glass, and when you opened it, a viper shot out from the shards of the glass figurines you asked for.
Sometimes you got your brother to open it, and the viper bit him instead.
Once, the viper had no fangs, and you laughed as it tried to gum you to death. Then the second viper that was hiding INSIDE the fangless viper shot out and bit you.
Once a guy showed up who was immune to viper venom, and took the viper as a pet. The viper bit everyone he loved and killed them all, then bit him repeatedly until he bled to death.
You don't trust stockings anymore. They are ALL full of vipers. If you can find no viper, it just means it is a very cleverly hidden viper.
That's what it's like to be The Imperium. There is ALWAYS a viper. Your body is scarred by viper bites. Your room is decorated with their skulls and bones. These days you just immediately hose the stocking down with your bolter and throw what's left in the fire.
You're sick of vipers.
You don't even want the stocking anymore.
>>45985488
So tell us anon, in your infinite wisdom, ehat ga,e/setting should we play instead of warhammer 40k, and why?
>>45987475
*what game/setting
>>45987299
It's funny that you think being a hypocrite somehow enhances your argument, especially when you do so under the fallacy of false equivalences.
Not all tastes are the same, and pretending that liking 40k is the same as... let's say liking the sources that inspired it (like Dune or Starship Troopers) is objectively wrong, and puts you on the level where you don't even understand that what you like is a shallow "parody" of better works. And Starship Troopers isn't even that good.
>>45975511
Excuses to sell overpriced toys, that's all there is to it.
>>45985394
ikr? Dawn of War came out a year after Warcraft3: Frozen Throne, and it was had better details and gameplay
>>45987711
You could leave at any time.
You hate this thing, but you keep talking about this thing.
You could leave.
And start a new thread.
You could go create the cool new thing not based on shit taste.
You could do it right here.
But you won't.
You'll stay right here, arguing about how terrible this thing that you hate is.
Because you're not actually here to make things better.
>>45985171
I know how you feel man, but I bought Tabletop Simulator and the steam workshop has 40k maps and models (excluding a few). Good Luck finding people to play with though. I'm willing to play with you though, if you're up for it
>>45987389
You are 400 years old.
You don't live anywhere near the Eye of Terror.
Every year, you get a stocking.
It has what you wanted in it.
There's never a viper.
We never talk about your stocking, because it's fucking boring.
There are a million stockings out there. Some are fine. Some are not. No shits are given about the ones are fine, because this world revolves around a viper-fighting game.
But, yeah, one day, you'll go to open your stocking, and an asteroid full of Orks will crash onto your planet and fuck everything up.
>>45988234
>I want a hugbox for my shit taste
I heard Reddit has a great 40k subreddit.
>>45983721
See, I keep seeing this really weird dichotomy. (Well, I'd say 'really weird', but I'm used to seeing it from politics.)
On one side, there's people saying it used to be wacky satire, but then the grimdark turned to grimderp (or shitdark, or whatever).
But then, on the other side, there's people talking about how it *used* to be wonderfully grimdark, and now it's all ridiculous happy triumphs that feel like Halo fanfic.
>>45988292
You're not fighting the good fight.
You're not proving anyone's point but mine.
The longer you're here, the worse this website gets, by your own definitions.
>>45988370
I don't think you understand how stupid your rhetoric is.
>You're not proving anyone's point but mine.
No, you.
>The longer you're here, the worse this website gets, by your own definitions.
No, you.
Run off to a 40k general and stay in there. Or, hop over to Reddit and stop spamming your 900 "How gay are you for this primarch?" threads already.
>>45983929
Here's your (You).
For people who actually want to learn something 40k has been historically aimed at a younger teenage audience whose parents are paying for their hobby. It has a high upfront cost because like many hobbies people have a tendency to buy a ton of models and equipment (especially their overpriced, Citadel-branded paint and tools) and then leave the hobby.
Specialist Games (Epic, BFG, etc.) were aimed at a somewhat older audience who might already be into wargames. The lines have gotten blurred since Specialist Games was canned ages ago (though recently reopened) and I think Forge World / 30k picked up a lot of older players.
>>45984237
It's also worth noting that GW pays their employees like shit. It's no surprise to me that the majority of their designers and writers (often people serve both roles...) are bad to mediocre. There are a few standouts like Abnett or ADB where most of their work is higher quality than the rest at least.
>>45987475
I think one of the reasons that 40k continues onward (I still play it despite all my gripes) is there isn't a competitor in the same space as it. Every other 28mm sci-fi wargame is skirmish-based and you only get 10-20 models. It doesn't satisfy my need to have 100 Guardsmen, air support, and artillery on the same board. I don't want to play in 6mm, even though I'd be happy if Epic made a return, because I like having the space on a 28mm miniature to customize and detail my guys.
If someone out there is making a wargame in 28mm where I can field a hundred men, tanks, artillery, and fliers with a more robust rule set than 40k I'd be happy to play it. Right now the closest there is to that is 30k, from the same goddamn people.
>>45986607
You could try 1d4chan. They have some decent articles about it.
>>45982985
It's practically impossible but basics are.
>super power soldiers fight nazis
>leader of group raises a sick-ass protege
>betrays USA for soviet union after war
>protege kills leader
>leader was actually a double agent the whole time and protege was manipulated the whole way through
>Protege becomes the Big Boss of a private military group after becoming disillusioned with countries
>wants to give soldiers homes and purpose and keep peace in the world
>Big Boss goes fucking crazy after his first attempt at this Haven is destroyed, wants peace through superior firepower
>builds a fuckheuge walker and gains nuclear capabilities to force the world into staying the fuck away
>Big Boss is killed by his clone that was started during his original mission
>All during this a group of puppetmasters have been pulling the strings of the world so they can continue to get rich off of a war economy
>two other clones of big boss happen and both try and destroy this group in their own crazy ways
>1st clone is manipulated into killing the both of them before realizing it
>1st clone is further manipulated by his desire for peace into destroying the puppetmasters by remnants of the other two clones before destroying them as well
>world is at peace
>NANOMACHINES SON
>>45975613
That video is sad.
Shootas penetrating power armor?
Choppas from basic boys chopping through power armor?
Space Marines getting killed by Boyz flamers?
They were unfit to be space marines.
>>45985638
Imperial Ships are like cities. The big ships can hold hundreds of thousands to millions of people on board.
>>45986715
If you want to learn how to play most of the rules are easy to find online and the 40k general here will probably have a PDF of anything that isn't. The general will also have some links to good resources for beginners as well.
If you're looking for lore, there's several places. Most of the Codex's (rulebooks for specific armies or factions) have a large number of quotes and small fluff pieces tucked away within them to give a feel for the particular faction. The Lexicanum is decent but like every wiki it doesn't go into much detail and you shouldn't believe everything you read on it. 1d4chan, despite many peoples issues with it, is also a decent source of information and a good exposure to how the fanbase (or at least how /tg/) thinks about the setting and what draws them to it, (Grimdark, ridiculous over the top violence, awesome deeds and sacrifices done by great heros). Just try to avoid all the rampant memery and autism.
>>45985343
However the best way to introduce yourself to the setting is the books, most of the stuff Black Library puts out is shit but they've got such a large collection of published works that there's a decent amount of actual good stories in there. Personally I'd recommend The Eisenhorn trilogy to start, it introduces you to a lot of important orginizations and concepts and captures the mood of the setting very well. After that if you want to read more about the humans within the Imperium I'd recommend the Gaunts Ghost series which covers the Imperial Guard pretty well. If you're interested in Space Marines, the Ultramarine novels by Graham McNeil are a good place to start, I'd also recommend the graphic novel Damnation Crusade. If you're interested in their fallen bretheren instead the Night Lords Trilogy by Aaron Dembski-Bowden is great.
I would specifically advise against reading the Horus Heresy books first (or at all) since they are intended to be a prequel and as such require a large amount of background knowledge.
>>45988463
> 100 Guardsmen, air support, and artillery on the same board
This here is the cancer killing 40k. Once upon a time, what you described was Apocalypse. Now is standard. Flyers at 1500, even 1000 points. Lords of war popping up right and left, three knight armies, triptides and all that jazz.
For fuck's sake, there was a time when a Wraithlord was actually scary, and a standard Dreadnought gave you pause. A Hammerhead made you shit your pants. Now all these are suboptimal choices.
>>45988906
All of that can be explained through the WAAAGH. But charging up a hill into a mob of orks? When you have bolters and they don't?
Fucking stupid.
>>45982985
Guy sneaks around and saves the world.
>>45987711
>It's funny that you think being a hypocrite somehow enhances your argument, especially when you do so under the fallacy of false equivalences.
Oh, don't compliment yourself, I'm not trying to argue, that's not worth my time. I was just insulting you, nigger faggot.
>>45988457
So anon, are you going to offer an alternative to 40k, or are you just going to bitch about people who like 40k?
>>45988906
all of that happens all the time. Every time Orks fight SMs.
>>45990463
>hey everyone! Look at me failing at discourse!
Beautiful. I've got a feeling that the "40k is just a shallow parody of Dune and Starship Troppers" hit you exactly where it hurts.
>>45990830
No, I really don't care what you think.
And I'd have to be an idiot to not realize that a setting which used to have a character named inquistor Obiwan Sherlock Clousseau isn't a parody.
My point is that your an asshole who is bitching just to bitch, and that you have not yet offered any alternative that fills the niche that 40k does, which shows you're only here to complain, despite your talk of "enlightening the board" and all that bullshit.
>>45983929
New pasta, thanks.
I also totally agree.
>>45986607
Saving this pic because the guy in the middle makes it.
>>45988250
It's really easy to find a game to play with. I play regular games of warhammer on tabletop simulator, and the best thing is, that you can have fun getting into as many different armies as you like for no extra cost
>>45975613
Did that dreadnought really get destroyed by a single ork hand grenade, or whatever that was?
>>45992078
That was a tank busta bomb, which is essentially a melta bomb.
Those things will fuck your armor up.
>>45988292
>I heard Reddit has a great 40k subreddit
Someone lied to you son.
DA ONLY THING YA NEED TO KNOW GIT IS DAT
GORK IS CUNNIN' BRUTAL AND MORK IS BRUTALLY CUNNIN
NOW STOP MUCKIN ABOUT
>>45975511
Edgy Star Wars with space nazis and no waifus.
>>45990539
No it doesn't. Flamethrowers barely even effect space marines unless it's souped up military grade imperial or chaos flamers that are strong enough to kill or mission-kill tanks. Choppas only cut through power armor with exceptional effort and do not instantly kill a space marine unless they decapitate them and the marine isn't wearing a gorget. Their redundant organs however ensure that anything that chops into their armor doesn't kill them, and rather the assailant gets blown away (astartes can survive being bisected with treatment from an apothecary in fact).
And shootas never kill space marines without stupidly lucky shots that manage to glance into the weaker joints. They're little better than autoguns, which harmlessly ping off power armor.
>>45993249
>Implying Gork isn't burtally cunnin and Mork isn't cunninly brutal
GET A LOAD A DIS GIT.
>>45975613
The sound of the captain yelling makes me laugh every goddamn time even when I know it's coming.
>>45988906
All of those things can and do happen in both the fluff and the tabletop.
>>45984237
>rantings of a manticfag
implying we buy books and not pirating it
>>45975511
Imagine if an emo kid, a teenage neo-Nazi, and a roided out highschool linebacker had a circle jerk onto a copy of Dune.
>>45975511
Take what you now from the lord of the rings. Make it so there's a lot more magic and there's also gunpowder. Now imagine lord of the rings but instead of Sauron, Morder and the corrupting influence of the one ring it is now malevolent gods, a place of the world where it is filled with dark magic and where logic is all but gone, this is chaos. Instead of the corrupting influence of just the one ring people can be corrupted by being closer to the chaotic part of the world or practicing dark arts related to chaos. Instead of noble Gondor and majestic Elves, they've been replaced with versions that are more then willing to kill innocents if it aids them against the chaos or maybe even against another faction of elves or humans. The orcs in this setting are different since they don't serve Sauron or the chaos gods but instead fight for themselves mainly for entertainment, the orcs can be enemies of humans or elves. Take all of this but out it on a galactic scale. There's also more comic relief such as in the orcs.
Lord of the rings>Warhammer fantasy>Warhammer 40k
>>45982985
>Boss is the best soldier ever and Big Boss is her protege.
>Boss goes rogue and Big Boss kills her but finds out she was actually a double triple quadruple agent and loyal to the US this whole time because it was kind of like the plot in Where Eagles Dare where she was trying to get information from therussians or something.
>Big Boss is now jaded as fuck and starts his own mercenary company to create the Boss's ideal world, because apparently he missed the memo about her being super loyal and thought her ideal world was about soldiers having no allegiances except to themselves.
>Big Boss's commanding Officer Zero inherited/stole illuminati money and used it to build an organization called the patriots that would eventually plunge the entire world into a state of controlled warfare and create a war economy in order to create Boss's ideal world because apparently he's fucking retarded
>They then make three clones of Big Boss, Solid Snake, Solidus Snake and British Snake
>Solid Snake is sent to kill Big Boss
>British Snake later steals a weaboo fightin robot and instantly gets his shit checked by Solid Snake
>Solidus Snake becomes president and instantly gets his shit checked by a cyborg ninja
>Solid Snake and Cyborg Ninja team up and instantly check the Patriots shit
>Then Solid Snake tries to check himself because he's got that disease from that Robin Williams movies where he ages real fast, but Big Boss stops him because the guy Solid Snake checked was actually some loser medic with a shitty facejob.
>Big Boss checks Zero, who was an old, seemingly comatose man by this point so it's not much of an achievement, also the patriots are already gone so it's kind of pointless
>Cyborg Ninja then gets his own series and checks so many guys so hard that he deleted the war economy a second time
>>45982985
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-YH3o2pf-Bc
>>46002306
>>45988779
>/v/ thinks this is a good story
.
>>45975810
At last, I understand the lore
thank you based anon
>>45988457
So how are you improving /tg/ with all your shitposting?
>>45991027
>doesn't care what anon thinks
>still responds
>>45975511
Someone took the Bible, the Crusades, Star Trek, Star Wars, the Soviet Union, Nazi Germany, Taoism, the Borg, the Cybermen, Ancient Egypt, Catholicism, the Force, rabies, porn, LSD, death metal, every disease known the man, superheroes, general dickery and an assload of other shit, stuck it in a blender, hit puree and out came 40k. You're welcome.
>>45975578
Best description I have seen yet, and I have been at the hobby for 20 years.
>>45975511
Life sucks, there's only war and you're probably going to get eaten by Tyranids. Have fun.
>>45975511
Good people die, the dicks usually win, everyone is (probably) incompetent, all races hate each other and will betray each other if there is a temporary alliance, magic is bad, all the heroes and villains are either dead or MIA, and time has stopped to the point where the story will never advance.
b-bump
>>45975578
20 years ago, maybe. now it's just GRIMDARK
>>45983929
>>45985062
>- Dumb.
>- Why?
>- Because dumb.
>- Please elaborate.
>- DUMBER THAN DUMB.
Some real smart, intelligent argumentation right here.
>>45985488
>developing a sense of style
Show me your style and I shall explain why your style is lame and nonsensical.
You love Tolkien? Black and white heroic adventure is unbearably idealistic, and the descriptions are sleep-inducing.
Lovecraft? More monotonous than reading binary, and also RAYSIZM.
Herbert or Zelazny? Talk about slinging bad ideas at each other and constructing a towering golem of ineptitude.
Howard? Ahahaha fucking grow up.
>>45987711
>Not all tastes are the same
True.
> is the same as... let's say liking the sources that inspired it (like Dune or Starship Troopers) is objectively wrong
Of course! 40k is pretty cool, while Dune is nice for the first book and meh afterwards. And the original Starship troopers book isabsolute shitjust like most of Heinlein's work.
>>46007302
>I am a giant faggot, the post
Holy fuck you need to off yourself.
>>46007581
Spotted the Heinlein fanboy.
>>46007302
That's a big fedora you have there.
idk how people can be so dumb as to not see that 40k being really dumb is the why a lot of people like the setting?
>>46007655
>dared to enjoy 40k
>did not agree that classics are somehow so much more stylish and intelligent than GW's plan to sell plastic
>FEDORA
>>46007302
You sound angry. And stupid. And underaged.
>>46007714
Really, it's people like you that make it obvious that only giant faggots like 40k.
>>45995821
>str 3 vs t4
>3+ save
marines die sometimes, deal with it
>>45995821
>>46008558
Fluff and crunch have never agreed on anything in 40k. Accept it and move on you'll be far happierOr stop playing a game that's been shitty for 2 and a half editions now
>>45984665
The amount of hate you hold of a Warhammer 40k is... inspiring.
You hate it with a passion, yet you chose to come here and scream.
Why? Do you think you'll change some hearts and minds with 'THIS IS BAD AND I DON'T LIKE IT' ?
>>46002615
Nigga no we don't. Ain't a sensible person alive who thinks MGS is has a well writen plot and isn't a clusterfuck of exposition. Its liked so much because of good voice work, great characters, and being so batshit crazy that its fun.
![1369532987212[1].jpg](https://i.imgur.com/OfEdBFZ.jpg "1369532987212[1].jpg")
>>45982824
why would you use the tiny version?
>>45985638
Imperial ships are kilometers long, and can hold hundreds of thousands of people
>>45985891
>>45986506
>Life may be cheap in the Imperium, but they'd look for another means of FTL if casualties were commonly that high.
Why? I mean, you said it yourself - life is cheap in the Imperium
btw, 8/10ths of the crew dying doesn't mean there was a warp breach. It just means that the working conditions for the slaves are so horrific and dangerous that the one that aren't dead from malfunctions and accidents will be dead from radiation exposure from the ships poorly shielded reactors, and simple exhaustion. That's how a lot of imperial ships operate - they pick up slaves at each port like they pick up provisions and fuel. Then they make the journey to the next world, during which time most of the slaves they picked up die, and when they reach port again they just pick up more slaves and carry on. The crewmembers with actual skills are fine (relatively, assuming the Geller field holds), it's just the manual labour that's expendable. It's no different from refuelling.
Of course, it depends on the type of ship. Your average freighter probably has much lower tech levels (and hence more need for slaves and worse conditions) than a Space Marine cruiser.
As for casualty rates - if a hive world gets a dozen of the vast, kilometers long, transport ships docking every day, and they each take on ten thousand slaves, then that's only a hundred and twenty thousand slaves a day. Or ~44 million a year. If the typical hive world has a population of 200 billion that's hardly going to make much of a dent; it's just the cost of doing business. That's the wonderful thing about humanity: we breed so fast you can kill as many as you want and there'll still be more where that came from. And THAT is the core principal which the Imperium is built around.
>>46007714
Yeah but they're not in anyway as fun
>>46009815
Anon that image is full of shit. Losing that many people to a single warp jump is considered a disaster.
>>46009815
You are making 40k too grimdark. Imperial ships do not loose that many men every time they make a Warp jump or are engaged in battle. It's true that the conditions the pressed slaves face can be shit, but unless the jump doesn't go completely smoothly or the ship has to give it's everything during a battle, they don't die pointlessly in their thousands.
>>46012419
http://warhammer40k.wikia.com/wiki/Imperial_Navy
>Indentured or slave workers are those unfortunate individuals who rank even below enlisted personnel on a warship and are press-ganged from a world's slums or taken en masse from penal colonies for their ability to perform unskilled hard labour. Most ships must replenish their crews of indentured workers every so often, as a steady stream die to malnutrition, accidents and disciplinary actions.
>Most ships must replenish their crews of indentured workers every so often, as a steady stream die to malnutrition, accidents and disciplinary actions.
Not saying that every imperial ship is crewed by 80% slaves, or that conditions are always so bad that most of them die (although that might not be unreasonable for some of them). Just trying to say that while the image might be an exaggeration, it's not much of an exaggeration. It captures the essence of space travel in 40k (except for the bit where it confuses astropaths and navigators, obviously. Someone should edit that).
>>46012770
>You are making 40k too grimdark.
40k IS grimdark. Literally - that's where the term comes from.
>they don't die pointlessly in their thousands.
why not? That sounds like a very 40k thing to happen. Although it's not exactly pointless - their blood oils the wheels that keep the Imperium turning.
>>46012857
>quoting the wikia
Literally pleb tier. Go buy a damn book poorfag instead of "citing" unreliable bullshit.
>>46013292
Fucking idiot...
>>46013763
>...
Fuck off you nigger.
>>45988463
>ADB
>good
Curzefag spotted
>>45975578
More specifically, Tolkein, Heinlein and Lovecraft, with a few gregorian chants thrown in.
>>45985343
Find some omnibuses.
Multiple stories and novels all bunched into one book.
I recommend the Space Marines one and the Imperial Guard one.
And as an individual book Helsreach is amazing.
Lots of power fantasies all form into one universe.
Most all of it follows the Rule of Cool and ignores practicality and common sense for a total feeling of "Holy fucking shit that's awesome."
You got your armies of super soldier humans which are as diverse as they are huge.
Space Vikings that ride giant wolves
Space Mongols on Bikes.
Space Teutonic Knights.
Stuff like that.
Then you have Space Elves who want to reconquer the galaxy by being sneaky and using super good spess magics.
You have the Orkz who do nothing but want to fight and loot stuff. They are usually the comic relief at times because DEY TALK LIKE DIS YA GIT. Also noted for being able to make things happen by simply willing it to happen. Red makes vehicles go faster. A bunch of junk can shoot bullets because the wielder wants to shoot from it. But they are too dull to harness this fully. Also they are technically fungus.
There's the Tau who are pretty much blue skinned aliens that use lots of mechs, shiny technology and Communism.
There's the Tyranids who came from another Galaxy and just want to eat everything. Like a giant mega space locust swarm.
There's Chaos which is Demons and sodomy and heavy metal and Super soldier guys mentioned above but in Demon Drugs.
That's a super simple version I guess.
>>45989660
Common complaints about the DoW cinematic debunked by some simple logic, that none of the complainers ever seem to use:
>Why didn't they wait for reinforcements?
The Dreadnought was the reinforcement.
>Then what about the drop pods?
Those only start landing after the point is captured. You can't spam drop pods without capturing points.
>Why did they charge uphill? Why didn't they just camp?
They had to secure the point so the player has enough resources to send drop pods. They were dying even while camping, see the Predator.
>>46019596
he gets it
>>46019353
I'm genuinely impressed by how gay you sound.
Were you typing all that with a cock in your mouth?
>>46021964
I'm genuinely impressed by how gay you sound.
Were you typing all that with a cock in your mouth?
>>46021964
Okay.
Thanks for letting is know.
>>45975511
Warhammer Fantasy.
In space.
Based on Paradise Lost.
Catholic Nazi Space Marines.
>>46003950
>everyone is (probably) incompetent
Incompetent until proven otherwise?
>>46013763
I get sick and tired of you people. Either get the fucking money to invest into a hobby like 40k, or even just arese yourself enough to go pirate the books, or don't bother. Wikis are not a source of information for anything- be they fiction or non-fiction.
>>45975611
>implying this isn't some mediavel feral world
http://youtu.be/-MeVxKZBOfM
>>45975511
If Dune was an orchestral piece, 40k would be the heavy metal cover version.
>>45984237
I love WH40K universe and I never ever spent a single penny for it, be it books or minis.
Maybe GW failed with me, but huh, sure it's a lot of work for a market-only strategy.
>>46013292
>>46025638
learn to tell when you've lost. At this point it would be less embarrassing for you if you simply stopped posting.
I'm >>46012857 btw, not >>46013763
>>46030515
kek that's exactly it
>>45975657
+ TERRIBLE rules and balance, at premium prices.
>>45975511
Cool setting, mostly nice miniatures, bad rules for the scale, too expensive, detestable fan base, did I say bad rules? I can't stress this enough.
Made by a company that genuinely hates most of it's customers and thankfully is losing business rapidly due to their actions.
>>45975511
A once entertaining, satirical scifi game now ruined by shareholders
>>46030515
More of a metal parody written by a band formed in high school that stuck together for twenty years because they all work at the same gas station, without improving at all during all that time.
Comparing 40k to Dune is kind of like comparing Twilight to Dracula.
>>46032077
>without improving
40k is actively getting worse.
>>46018633
Good God no. It's much more Herbert, Moorcock and 2000AD.
>>45988779
>didn't even mention Ocelot, the main character
>>46032340
This desu.
Arbites are literally Judge Dread, and every Hive World is Mega City One
>>45975511
Sunk cost fallacy.
>>46030738
>assmad poorfag too hurt to admit he can't afford warhams
>>46009815
You do know that Imperial voidships have persistent enough crews to have people born on them? Warships are the ones with slave crews, presumably because when you fire building-sized chunks of metal at each other the crew will have such horrific casualties anyway that who even cares anymore.
I just fucking hate that picture because it misrepresents the fuck out of Warp travel and yet anons keep reposting it.
>>45975511
>Can anyone briefly explain Warhammer 40K to me, please?
>172 posts later
Empirically not.
>>45975511
In the distant past psychic aliens called the Old Ones had a fight with Egyptian Void Robots and turned a dimension of pure thought into Hell.
Then some Space Elves formed a huge empire, while at the same time Humans began to colonize the other end of the galaxy. Humanity reaches an amazing technological high before robots rebel. The robots lose, but now humanity doesn't trust technology.
Then the Space Elves have a galaxy-wide orgy and fuck that dimension of pure thought into being Double Hell. The only ones that didn't were Elf Amish or Elf Gypsies.
This ruined Human civilization, as their only method of FTL travel depended on going through the dimension of thought. Psychics also start showing up on Human world, only to turn into gateways into Double Hell.
Things sucked.
Then the Emperor, an immortal psychic badass, revealed himself. He united Earth under his rule with an army of genetically engineered soldiers, and got the tech-cultists on Mars to worship him instead.
He makes 20 armies of better super soldiers called Space Marines, each with an even better Primarch. But then the rulers of Double Hell kidnap them because they're dicks like that.
So the Emperor takes his armies, reunites humanity, gets the primarchs back, commits a few genocides, and all in all has a nice time crusading. He heads back to Earth to work on some stuff.
Then half the military comes under the influence of Double Hell and starts a civil war. They're defeated and their leader obliterated, but the Emperor has to be put on a life support device/psychic lighthouse forever. The traitor armies retreat to a hole between reality and Double Hell called the Eye of Terror.
Over the next ten milennia things get worse. All the loyalist primarchs die or go missing, the Egyptian robots wake back up, space locusts invade, a minor power in the right place at the right time starts spreading communism, and fungus orcs just rampage randomly.
Humanity has gotten a lot more tyrannical.
>>45983929
Thank you
