>Have game night last Sunday.
>GM has us explore some ruins.
>Random encounter goes really bad, it becomes a TPK.
>GM goes in full Deus Ex to save us.
>Instead we keep trying to get killed to counter that.
>Eventually we pause the game because we are all laughing too much.
That was fun. Tell me /tg/, what is the weirdest thing that has happened in your games?
Pic unrelated.
>>45609067
How are those breasts being held up by such flimsy lace?
Those things are wild.
>>45609087
WIZZARRDDD
>>45609087
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFQCYpIHLNQ
>>45609133
>>45609125
Is it ever explained how the Sorceress got such massive mammaries? Was she a late-bloomer, or did those tits come out the moment puberty hit?
I've ran games for like eight years now, but I always had only guy players. Then last June we got a new player, female, punky/goth-ish and hot as all the everloving fuck. Pretty much everyone got a crush on her until we all figured out she just wanted friends, and she became a fembro.
Then a couple weeks ago I mentioned to my players I had bought two tarantulas after x-mas, a redknee and a chilean rose. My female player kept asking them to let her see them and even let them walk on her hand and arm. Then saturday after the game she offered to say to help me clean, and when we were alone she said she was going to ask me something weird. I asked what, she got red as a tomato and said she wanted to ask me to let my tarantulas walk over her body. Naked.
I asked if she was serious, she said she always wanted to and this may be her only chance. Then said that if I helped her she would be so horny she would make it worth my while.
We got to my bedroom, she stripped naked and I let my redknee walk over her pussy, her navel, her tits and then over her soles, ass and back. Of course I had a massive hard-on, so when I put the spider away she just stared at me all wide eyed and said "oh god lets fuck please".
So, not only I got to see her naked, I did her twice that night, she let me do it without condom and even finish inside, and then stayed with me all night cuddling. The next morning she said she hoped we could do it again in a few days and kissed me in the lips before leaving.
I am not sure if it counts as weird, but holy fuck I love my life.
>>45609458
*stares* I think this counts as a win. Holy crap man! I love your life!
>>45609713
*grabs throat*
BACK THE FUCK OFF?!?!?!?!
>>45609750
*raises paw*
umm.... what???
>>45609778
>it was a hologramI know, wrong thread, but I had to
>>45609087
>>45609458
I approve of this story, 10 / 10. But maybe be careful in the future. Children can get in the way of your future games (as well as your life in general) so unless you really want a child you may wanna wrap it.
Also, though I'm sure your not the type to brag too much, keep your party out of the loop on this. A jelly group could easily lead to hostility and a group falling apart.
>>45609152
It's because she's the Necromancer.
Seriously.
There's a really good read on how the series of games involves turning Necromancers from wizardly old men into nurturing females.
>>45609152
They're where she keeps her magic.
I had a player beat a man to death with a child... no one survived
>>45609458
>getting turned on by venomous, dangerous animals walking over sensitive parts of her anatomy
Dude, don't stick it in crazy. She sounds like she's insane
>>45609458
Yep. Pretty weird. But sounds normal for goth people.
>>45610036
I mean, all sorts of people have way crazier shit that turns them on.
This is honestly pretty tame, really. She's just interested in the tactile feel of it, along with the concept.
Storytime
>new semester, new D&D group, minus myself and the GM
>3 other newbies, 1 girl
>day 1, we're all introducing our characters
>it passes to me
>rolled a rogue
>only description I give is that he has dirty blonde hair
>GM: "Ok, what's his name"
>me: "none"
>GM gives me strange rooms at first, but finally lets it go
>we get to playing
>run around using nothing but a hand crossbow
>steal a horse at every town we enter
>group consistently has to fight a dozen town guards, or deny association with me entirely
>group getting fucking pissed by this point, as I have become "That Guy"
>finally we start along a major quest line
>stage 1 involves us bringing in 2 wanted criminals in the city we're in
>we locate them, group is strongly in favor of sneaking in and knocking them unconscious
>I kick down the door, pass a bluff check, and challenge them both to a Mexican standoff
>It fucking works, and thanks to Attack of Opportunity and Rapid Reload, I roll critical damage and finish them both off in 1 round
>turns out they were hoarding a hefty chest of gold
>put it in my Bag of Holding and ride off on a stolen horse, leaving my party yet again to deal with legions of city guards
and that's why I'm no longer allowed to play rogues
>>45610036
>tarantulas
>dangerous
there are literally zero recorded cases of death caused by tarantula
>>45609872
>There's a really good read on how the series of games involves turning Necromancers from wizardly old men into nurturing females.
Wouldn't the ideal MILF Necromancer be a pleasant, older-looking woman with wide hips?
>>45610115
>what are wandering brazil spiders
>what is anaphylactic shock
>>45610134
Sorc is in fact the youngest of the characters designed with this idea.
But generally, it's less to do with the concept of a woman, and more to do with the archetype of a fertility goddess. There's a huge amount of interesting art decisions behind the various games they've done, in terms of historical references and designs
>>45610199
Brazilian Wandering Spiders belong to the group Ctenidae, not to Theraphosiade.
>>45610199
>>45610236
woooooooow, you just got told senpai
>>45610115
>Not dangerous
She had those right against her pussy by what anon said.
>>45609067
>Disgustingly oversized tits
>>45610236
>>45610199
Are you confusing Brazilian Wandering Spiders with Goliath Birdeaters?
Because Birdeaters are more than capable of biting humans, but their vemon is essentially harmless.
Now, you might bring a point of shock, but that's both random and unlikely. Beyond that, Spiders generally only bite when threatened, so long as she stays fairly calm(she's hardly going to freak out at this point, given the situation, anyways). She'd be fine.
And even then, it could just as easily end up being a dry bite.
>>45610203
>Sorc is in fact the youngest of the characters designed with this idea.
>Supposed to be a fertility goddess
>Her hips aren't even that wide
>She's hardly got any fat
>She doesn't look pregnant or even recently knocked up
Literally the only thing you have to claim she's a fertility goddess is big fat tits.
>>45610365
There's other things that allude to her nurturing aspect.
Take this picture, for example.
Observe how she is interacting with the skeleton. Note that not only is she holding the skeleton to her chest, but in the way she's holding it's head. She's properly supporting it's skull, the same way you would a new born baby.
There's also the fact that one of the other big things Sorc does in the game is grow food to heal the party, which seems pretty at odds with the concept of a Necromancer, but right in line with the fertility archetype.
>>45609458
That's bullshit but I believe it.
>>45609458
If I were one of your players I'd step on your fucking spiders after punching you in the face. Can't you get a cat or a budgerigar instead of fucking spiders?
>>45610424
>Observe how she is interacting with the skeleton. Note that not only is she holding the skeleton to her chest, but in the way she's holding it's head. She's properly supporting it's skull, the same way you would a new born baby.
That's really stretching the theory, don't you think?
>>45610424
she makes food for her companions too
>open dnd story thread before heading to class
>come back, suddenly shpiders and titties debate
/tg/ can't keep a thread on track for shit
>>45610449
I don't really think so, given the detail of their artwork in other situations and the situation.
I mean, if she was just holding it randomly, maybe, but she's all but breastfeeding the skeleton
>>45610500
how about spider titties?
>>45610500
Love it or leave it, /tg/ never changes.
>>45610424
>>45610515
This theme can be seen in all their games though.
I mean, in Odin Sphere, the only character with noticeable tits of any import is in fact the Queen of the Dead.
GrimGrimoire also featured the various schools of magic being embodied by their various teachers, and both of the Necromancers in the game, were, surprise, busty women.
>>45610530
acceptable.
moar.
>>45610445
What's your fucking problem?
>>45610445
Jesus dude chill
>>45609458
Enjoy your STD and/or alimony payments.
>>45609458
You did check to make sure she wasn't a Drow right?
>>45610445
He didn't even bring them to the game, he just mentioned he had them.
Seriously, I get if you don't like spiders, but he's not asking you to go anywhere near them.
>>45610611
Necromancers are seen as bad girls.
Bad girls have big tits.
>>45610891
Why so bitter, anon-kun?
Still a virgin?
>>45610956
>still a virgin?
wheredoyouthinkyouare.jpg
>>45611061
Who the fuck is still a virgin nowadays?
>>45610896
>>45611104
>>45611083
your mom
>>45611171
Twelve year old detected
>>45611171
>i'm jesus
dang it
>>45610095
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TiquNvyFe4U
>>45611083
I'd venture to guess that a fair number of children 10 and under are. And a handful of manchildren 40 and over
>>45610445
In a discussion about goths and giant spiders, how did the guy against them turn out to be the edgelord faggot?
>>45610956
No, actually. I've been burned enough.
>>45610095
What system?
I'm not saying this didn't happen but crossbows have sucked in almost every system I've seen them appear in, regardless of feats. I'm guessing 3.X/PF and you meant Combat Reflexes/Snap Shot instead of a feat named "Attack of Opportunity"?
Also, a rogue being greedy and asocial doesn't seem very weird to me.
>>45610611
>Skeleton tits
How?
>>45611931
Necromancy.
>>45609886
OH for fucks sake story tiem nao
>>45609067
Instant Replies: the image.
>>45609458
>she let me do it without condom and even finish inside
So you put your dick in crazy, and you didn't even use protection. Rookie mistake.
