OOTS 1017: Personnel Changes
Oh fuck.
New High Priest a cute
I'm calling it now, xykon finds out about hels plan and stops it
Well, I suppose now's the time for Belkar to redo what he did since he awoke as the Sexy Shoeless God of War.
Ok, so NOW will the other priests start caring about the vampire apocalypse that's been happening in their cathedral? Well, the earth priests cathedral, who've now all been killed and turned into vampires.
>>44561028
Any page where Xykon actually does something would be a good page. Hell, when's the last time we actually even fucking SAW Xykon?
Because seriously, I literally cannot remember. It was so long ago. How many years has it been? It's been just random side villains and stupid mooks and what have you for so long that I can't remember the main villain's last act any more.
>>44561098
Exactly! Durkula and his buttbuddy are about to win and the they get 3.5ed wizarded
>>44561098
... shit. I think it was seriously back when Redcloak switched the phylacteries around.
I didn't even fucking remember that plot point any more and had to look at Wikipedia. How long ago was this?
>>44560988
Am I the only one who thinks that the rules of this summit are retarded and make no sense, other than to add DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA?
I mean, they just fucking watched a fighter duke it out with a giant vampire dwarf, and now they reveal that they've actually killed most of the people assembled there, but it's all "THERE IS LITERALLY NOTHING WE CAN DO BECAUSE TECHNICALLY"
If your fucking godly summit over the fate of the world gets fucked up ten different ways and infested by vampires, you should probably sort that shit out and reschedule. This is some bad writing, yo.
This is why Common Law is better than Civil Law, guys
The right time to convert.
>>44561193
>Am I the only one who thinks that the rules of this summit are retarded and make no sense, other than to add DRAMA DRAMA DRAMA?
Yeah, it's an awkward parody of democracy. Except it's democracy where people can just sort of stand around as a vampire kills half the people present, threatens publically to rig a vote with murder and magic and the only guy actually trying to stab said vampire is abusing an equally vapid loophole to do so.
>>44561320
Earth Clerics don't worship a god, they don't count as people and therefore it's not murder.
>>44561320
>>44561193
>implying it's not a metaphor for the US financial crisis an political deadlock.
>>44561098
>>44561160
He and Redcloak teleported to outside Girard's pyramid right before it blew the fuck up.
Xykon wanted to kill the Order on the spot, the Monster in the Darkness talked him out of it because he recognized them as O-Chul's allies (and O-Chul is the Monster's BFF now), so Redcloak summoned a sand elemental to deal with them while Team Evil headed to the final dungeon.
>>44561193
>>44561320
It's still better than the other possibility since this way there's no risk of creating another Snarl.
>>44561364
>Making possibly the most pivotal moment in your plot seem like hacky, terribly clumsy shit writing to make a metaphor
Yeah, that'd be smart. Then again, the alternative is that Burlew's just dropping the ball this badly and it just is hacky, clumsy shit writing.
Oh, who am I kidding? It's bad writing anyhow.
>>44561320
It's a joke that has taken too long
>>44561401
This exactly. However bad this is, however bad Hel is gaming the system, it's STILL better than them having the chance of creating another evil god-undoing monster.
>>44560988
i am very, very bored of this summit crap. if burlew wants a lot of tweests, he should at least upload 2 times a week instead once a blue moon.
>>44561193
They were poaching the godless priests.
>>44561193
>If your fucking godly summit over the fate of the world gets fucked up ten different ways and infested by vampires, you should probably sort that shit out and reschedule. This is some bad writing, yo.
Divine laws very frequently work with bizarre loopholes and requirements.
LIke the only way to get people to stop having to sacrifice goats and to cut and suck baby dicks forever being to sacrifice yourself to yourself so you can forgive people (of which you are one now) of having an ancestor who ate a magic pomegranate.
>>44562083
>Divine laws very frequently work with bizarre loopholes and requirements.
>LIke the only way to get people to stop having to sacrifice goats and to cut and suck baby dicks forever being to sacrifice yourself to yourself so you can forgive people (of which you are one now) of having an ancestor who ate a magic pomegranate.
That's an awfully convoluted chain of requirements to hop through for a supposedly omnipotent being.
>>44562227
Yep. also, I think its likely that the rules of the Godsmoot was set up PURPOSEFULLY to allow for killing godless priests... because they're a huge threat to their system. They basically illegally download spells. Things aren't working out how they intended, though.
>>44562227
Look, when you're trying to tell people you're all-powerful and all-knowing and shit, just straight up telling them that you suddenly changed your mind on something you cursed them with for who knows how long isn't exactly encouraging. You gotta make them feel like it was their efforts and ideas that got them out of the doghouse.
Well, once Durkon teleports to the dorfhalls, I'm calling that the priestess of Loki he fucked will be there.
Figured she would be the high priest actually, but no cigar.
>>44562487
That would be awesome
>>44562627
Rich is pretty big on pottery. He uses the parallel development as a narrative device a lot.
Last we saw Hilgaya, Durkon told her that she's retarded because he's actually exiled while she ran away from an arranged marriage, and she ran away crying. It would be poetic if she actually went back to her husbandwho would be incidentally one of the dwarven kings, and ran into Durkon who got fucked for all his victim complex and bottled up spite. She's too much of a Chekov's gun not to use her at this point.
Same reason why I kind of expect Belkar to die and meet Miko in the TN afterlife.
>>44561007
I would stake her, that's for sure.
>>44561256
I knew it, this was all anglo-saxon law propaganda the whole time!
Isn't only the high priest attending the meet protected by the rules? A group of mid level vampires vs a room full of high level priest, not smart.
Guess it's time for Roy to show off his bobbies again otherwise.
>>44561256
>>44562786
Corpus Iuris Civilis, motherfuckers.
Roman Law is best law.
>>44562850
>bobbies
What.
Wait, what if the priests of the gods who voted to destroy the world originally walked out without appointing successors.
Wouldn't the vote swing towards keeping the world intact and fuck Hel over?
>>44563441
They could, but they won't. That's what their patron god has decided, so they're sticking with it.
>>44563405
Whoops. my bad. Boobies.
>Next in line
>in line
I like this
The Exarch guy looks so happy in panel 5, guess it feels good to be needed.
>>44563405
It's a cleavage joke.
>>44563787
Yeah, the guy already clarified that he meant boobies.
>>44562227
>That's an awfully convoluted chain of requirements to hop through for a supposedly omnipotent being.
When your literally all powerful, both the convoluted method and the simple method are equally difficult and convenient. So you choose the method that's the more fun.
It's like playing Dwarf Fort. You could make a perfectly defensible, self-sufficient and safe fortress damn near anywhere if you're sensible. Or, you could build a madhouse with criss-crossing lava pathways, controlled by a series of floodgates and pump houses, controlled by thirty unlabeled levers.
>>44562744
>Rich is pretty big on pottery. He uses the parallel development as a narrative device a lot.
What do you mean by "big on pottery?" Is that a literary term?
>>44564462
Assuming this isn't bait, "pottery" (a mispelling of poetry) is a term used, either seriously or sarcastically depending on context, to refer to thematic parallels, mirrored character arcs or plots, and other moments when you realise something about how carefully plotted a piece of work is.
For example, in ASoIaF, in the latter books both Jaime and Barristan begin to reconsider their own lives and choices, and in doing so make frequent references to the other's deeds and attitudes. That's pottery.
>>44564437
>When your literally all powerful, both the convoluted method and the simple method are equally difficult and convenient. So you choose the method that's the more fun.
How is watching yourself getting crucified, while experiencing said crucifixion fun?
>>44564631
>Assuming this isn't bait, "pottery" (a mispelling of poetry) is a term used, either seriously or sarcastically depending on context, to refer to thematic parallels, mirrored character arcs or plots, and other moments when you realise something about how carefully plotted a piece of work is.
I knew what they meant from the context; I just hadn't seen "pottery" used in place of "poetry" before. I'm guessing it's a George Lucas reference.
It wasn't bait at all and I appreciate you giving me a sincere answer. Thank you.
>>44564792
>How is watching yourself getting crucified, while experiencing said crucifixion fun?
Don't kinkshame.
>>44560988
Vampires are super fucking lame, I think when they started taking centrestage is when I started losing interest in this comic
>>44564817
Yeah, it's a Lucas reference.
>>44564892
>Vampires are super fucking lame
BITCH I EAT PEOPLE!
>>44564912
Alucard is alright maybe, abridged series are shit.
>>44564912
Even Alucard calls out other vampires for being lame, though.
>>44564987
In Hellsing he, as Dracula, was originally defeated utterly by a small group of humans and only became as super overpowered after Hellsing experimented on him to create the ultimate vampire to serve his family line.
>>44563495
But didn't the gods want to take back their votes when Hel showed up for the vote?
>>44565057
Also there's the fact that he's drank the blood of literally millions of people.
>>44565116
The Alucard at the end of the series is far weaker since he had to kill all the souls inside himself to come back but on the flipside he now is actually immortal and can appear anywhere like Schrodinger due to becoming like his nature.
>>44565096
Honestly, if there was an adventuring party around with a paladin at epic levels, that paladin could easily receive covert orders to go smite the shit out of Hel.
Hell, one of the gods could very easily bribe a few epic level wizards to go beat the shit out of Hel on the down-low
>>44564912
>Alucard
>badass
>The leech that got beaten SO HARD by Abraham that he still has frantic nightmares of the moment over a century later which cause him to weep bitch tears of blood in fright
Does the Dark One not get a vote or does Redcloak not know about it?
>>44565357
You know, the Dwarven Council is also very likely to be heavily defended, being the seat of power for the northern tribes and all. Two vampires vs possibly Dwarf Fortress OCD levels of Defense. Sounds Fun.
>>44565670
I think he already casted a vote in one of the other pantheons, I think the Western one Mesopotamian inspired.
>>44565588
To be fair, it's Abraham van motherfucking Helsing.
>>44565588
Van Hellsing was a complete badass.To put things in perspective lets look at the only other time Alucard was beaten and what exactly it took to do it.
>50 years of planning
>The invasion and complete destruction of one of the biggest cities in the world
>Taking over an aircraft carrier to trick him into being stranded in the ocean so he couldn't stop said invasion
>1000 elite nazi vampire soldiers
>An entire crusade
>Most of the Iscariot organization
>The church's top agent imbued with the power of god from one of the most holy artifacts in the world
>One of the worlds top vampire hunters in his prime
>The complete and utter bullshit that is Schrodinger
As far as we know Van Hellsing didn't have nearly as many resources and he still beat Alucard more severely that the Major did.
>>44566143
Yeah, but that was when Alucard was old Dracula, not Super-Dracula, which the Helsing organization turned him into.
>>44565588
He also has wet dreams about getting bumfucked by turks
>>44566143
Yeah, but at that time he hadn't done the grind yet to obtain the best personas like the Hound of the Baskervilles.
>>44566143
You forgot something.Zeppelins!
>>44564892
vampires are one of the great high level antagonists in D&D
>>44566271
>He also has wet dreams about getting bumfucked by turks
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone
>>44566271
>He also has wet dreams about getting bumfucked by turks
Is this seriously a thing? Leave it to Alucard to have dreams like that but never fugg Seras
>>44566271
Those aren't wet dreams those are flashbacks to when he was held hostage by the sultan as a boy.
>>44566798
He's holding out for that beast of a woman Integra.
But yes, he was assraped by Turks.
Oh good, hes finally getting on with the story.
oh, no wait, this is the exact opposite of that.
GET ON WITH IT!
>>44566820
Ah ok, thanks.
>>44566798
He's more interested in Integra.
Fucking Seras would be like boning his daughter.
>>44567146
>>44566143
>The complete and utter bullshit that is Schrodinger
There's not enough good Schrodinger porn, and THAT is bullshit.
>>44567146
Seriously though, was there ever an explanation of why he turned Seras specifically? Just to be nice?
>>44567195
Because she has tits the size of beachballs.
>>44567195
I always figured that once you get to be a certain age you just start doing things for shits and giggles.
When the hell is the next abridged episode supposed to come out? Episode 6 was supposed to be released a couple months ago, I hope they haven't got a C&D or something.
>>44567195
A moment's whim of pity, probably. Or maybe she reminded him of Mina Harker. You can't rule out pure boredom, either.
>>44567473
Also because he's so strong nobody can really stop him from doing stuff.
>>44567195
Well, how could you not?
>>44567554
I'm just hoping they tackle 6&7 together, this is were the series starts running out of budget and adds cinematic panning shoots of people talking dramatically.
>>44568442
A master is out.
>"Haha! I'm a vampire! I'll destroy the world based on paperwork and poorly worded technicalities!
>one month until the next update
"But oh! You forgot to fill out this form! red tape saves the world again!
>one month until the next update
>"Hah! Yet more technicalities make my destruction of the world imminent!"
>two months until the next update
Fucking jesus christ, this is supposed to be the climatic point in your comic! Either put more substance into your updates, or fucking shit out one a day! As it is, you have to wait aeons for even a small bit of overly complicated advancement, which is instantly made irrelevant by the next fucking comic page of fake world pencil pushing! Do something, anything, please just move the damn pace along!
>>44565670
Pretty sure he doesn't get a vote because he doesn't deserve a say in the preservation of a world he didn't help to create in the first place.
>>44569137
You think richie can render all those stick figures who will be obsolete in 5 strips tops with detailed frames and +30 facial expressions easily with his broken fingers? j-just be patient, I swear it will flow a lot better in the book.
>>44567195
He said it right there. It was just a whim to give her the choice, and then he let her pick.
So, uh.
How powerful is he that he raised that many vampires all in one day? What the fuck is in that staff?
Shouldn't the other vampires still be earth clerics? Durkula converted to hel because of alignment inversion but the earth clerics are neutral so they should still be clerics of earth not hel.
>>44570340
Don't forget, vampires in this world are dark energy creatures, no longer who they used to be.
Plus we're in dwarven lands, so Hel probably has some power over the new vampires.
Or maybe as their sire, Durkon is simply willing them to do as he wishes.
>>44560988
So hey, if Roy just killed the new high priest, he'd win would he not?
Given how strong his sword is against undead, and how their second strongest dwarf almost lost to a bunch of animals, he could likely kill every other vampire when they teleported then wmake Hel lose, since he's still, technically, the bodyguard of Hel's priest.
>>44570581
He destroys one high cleric, and the next vampire cleric of Hel becomes high cleric. Then Roy destroys the next, and the next one becomes high cleric.
This can go on and on and on.
And there's a possibility that one of them might simply decide to stay glued on the ceiling and wait it out.
>>44570641
I say Roy and Belkar if he survives, could kill all vampires there before Durkon found all the kingdoms.
>>44570340
Hel creates the vampire spirits of dwarves to be loyal to her from the start, and the non-dwarves are probably still slaved to Durkula.
>>44567195
He fatally wounded her to accomplish his job, but she really wanted to live.
As somebody who became a super-monster because he really wanted to live and now wants to die just as badly, he decided to give her the chance to survive.
Also, the shits and giggles factor, which is also the reason Alucard allowed his opponents to lose to him rather than just instagibbing them.
>>44563369
Roman jurisprudence is in essence the basis of both divergent systems (common law and civil law), but, in its unmodified form, is not something that I'd put up with in modern times.
>>44569163
Except the current blocking point is because a former mortal dwarven god is the deciding vote.
How many levels do you guys think Roy(and Belkar) is getting out of this encounter?
2, 3? enough to gain a lead over the party?
>>44571022
Belkar could really do with some, and he specialises in killing hordes over duelling - depending on how good the vamps are (if they're made the same way Durk was originally then they might be a bit dumb) I think Belkar will get quite a lot out of this, assuming he can handle the Goliath without getting too fucked up.
>>44570937
Couldn't he just say 'Fuck your shit, the vote was rigged, so I'm gonna say yes because if you have to rig the vote to make them say no, they would have said yes.'?
>>44571200
He's a Dwarf. Abiding by the exact letter of oaths is what they do. The intention doesn't matter, just that the oath was followed.
>>44564937
I know this is probably bait but in case it isn't...
Though lackith taste good sir.
>>44569293
I think it is a sign of the end of days that Outsider, the fucking poster child for never updating is doing so with more regular frequency than OOTS
>>44570937
But the dwarves were made by the gods to be actual people, and the dwarves have gods who would go to bat for them and be ok with a demigod who will obviously be allied with them ascending.
The Dark One on the other hand was created on accident to represent a race which was created to be exp sponges. He has no real allies, but they can't just snuff him out, they don't have to involve him in anything however.
Divine Politics.
>>44573771
>buying into goblin misinfo
They aren't even the right size! How are we supposed to trust ANYTHING they say?
>>44561028
>>44561098
>Durkula and friend teleport to the Dwarven fort
>discover all the delegates have already been killed
>Xykon & co are standing there
>>44561334
This.
No real people died.
>>44576307
>"Redcloak, was that a Vampire Dwarf Cleric?"
>"Yes, I believe it was."
>"Redcloak, I want to go murder more Vampire Clerics."
>"Xykon no we need the gate now"
>"But Vampire Clerics make funny noises when they screw up and forget I'm undead too!"
And once again, the day was saved, thanks to a crazy lich who has too much fun killing things.
>>44569137
As much as I've been a fan of this comic, this really is too much. The finish line is right over there; stop shitting by the side of the road and just end already.
Why does it take so long for some wanker to draw stick figures
>>44560988
Oh look gang the High Priest of Hel is outside of the idiot bubble! Snicker-snack, fighting man.
>>44573523
>Though
And you lacketh the literacy.
>>44577963
A surprising number of webcomic drawing wankers have fucked up their hands in some way or another.
>>44567195
alucard actually loves humanity for all its flaws and hates those that forsake it for power. seras is an arch atypical human. not very strong, not very bright but has immense determination and resolve. he turned her because he liked her
>>44565670
I imagine he's a demigod and he'd only get a say in the case of ties. And I'm pretty sure that he'd vote in the Eastern Pantheon because of geography reasons.
>>44567554
Well, there was an incident a month ago where all of their DBZA videos got hit with copyright takedowns. I guess that slowed down production dramatically.
But hey, we're supposed to get Hellsing every 6 months now, so... Yay!
>Go to the OotS forums
>check thread
>9 pages discussing the minutae of the rules
>not one post stating the obvious reaction:
>OH FUCK VAMPIRES!
>SHIT! THEY'RE GOING TO KILL US!
>UNDEATH TO DEATH!
>>44576724
Honestly, I hope Xykon ends up as the monkey wrench to Hel's plan. It suits him well being the wild card.
>>44564792
It's an experience, though.
And more to the point, it's an experience that you'd have to spend years arranging just so to get it to happen, and have the exact cascading domino effect that you want afterwards.
I mean, sure, you could just take the most direct route and make it that it happened that way. Or you could manipulate and get it to turn out that way.
...shit, now I see why asshole immortals like to manipulate people. It's how they get their rocks off.
>>44565185
I don't know that I'd call him weaker. If anything, he became stronger, because he exists wherever he perceives himself to be.
>>44580822
Only if they attack the high priests and their bodyguard.
As long as the vampires behave, it's not allowed to really attack them.
>>44584142
The last panel doesn't make them look like they're going to behave. But yeah, mostly, just wanted to point out how...bizarre the other discussion was.
>>44584142
The vampires aren't supposed to be there. As per protocol, they need to be removed.
...
by the exarchs of the Stone, kek.
>>44560988
>They're still on Namek
>>44564892
Malek was interesting, Durkula is only interesting in reference to Durkon's failures and the Roy fight.
I still don't really care for this whole "turning into a vampire unseats you from your body and a different entity takes control" nonsense, it somewhat undermines Malek's character from being a liberated lizard wizard to being Nergal's brain pet thing that probably spent a week watching the exciting memories of a lizard man's entire life of rolling in mud, shitting pellets in water and that one really cool time he left his mouth open and a bird flew in for the fuck of it.
I assume this is just how Burlew chose to handle Durkon's religious challenge of dying in combat vs dying of a disease, but I don't feel like there was a real build up for the religious aspect of this arc.
His father died in combat to a fire troll and is probably in Valhalla with his wife's arm for company. Durkon is entirely healthy and has really never faced the prospect of his death, only knowing he would die eventually on good terms with his homeland.
Even the idea that evil vampire durkon was perfectly made for this task by Durkon is kind of silly since all you really needed were any three vampires at all: one to vote and two to rig the votes.
>>44564892
I don't even check GITP anymore because the fucking comic updates so slowly and whenever it is updated it just winds up on /tg/ anyway.
At least people are starting to post decent comics like Erfworld now.
>>44585148
>His father died in combat to a fire troll and is probably in Valhalla with his wife's arm for company.
That shouldn't be so funny.
>>44585148
The fuck was Hel going to do if Malek and Durkon got along just fine and Durkon never turned?
>>44585298
I kind of wonder if Daddy Durkon even died to a fire troll and not some disease and that's why Durkon was evicted and the truth about his Dad was hidden away.
>>44585084
>comparing this to Namek
Please. Splitting the party was the worst shit.
are we still doing these
>>44585430
Keep waiting.
>>44585183
>decent comics like Erfworld now.
Don't you mean Erfworld in Chapter 1?
>>44585573
>No you ass
>>44584142
>As long as the vampires behave, it's not allowed to really attack them.
Not exactly, there's literally no rules against attacking them or not attacking them. Hence why Durkon was able to kill them all without breaking any rules. By the same token the clerics can all just blast them with impunity since they're not god worshipers and therefore technically not part of the god moot.
>>44585667
They're now all part of the Hel Hierarchy, not godless priests anymore who don't have anyone intervening for them.
That's why Durkula attacked and vampified them in the first place. They had nobody to speak for them.
Now they all do, as minions of the queen of the underworld.
>>44585745
Doesn't matter, only one High Priest and Two Bodyguards are allowed as per the rules. Now either all vampires but One High Priest and One Vampire bodyguard leave(Roy is using the second Bodyguard slot), or they get removed by force.
I imagine that task would fall to the Exarchs as I state before, but without them there? Are all the priest going to start taking sides and make a second miniSnarl? or are the extra vampires going to remain in their former capacity as exarchs and start "converting" to Hel as Roy climbs up the "Hel-archy"?
>>44585605
I mean your taste a shit
>>44560988
I want to get off Rich Burlew's Wild Ride
>>44585573
"gas !"
Wouldn't all the other clerics be able to kill every vampire that isn't the current High Priest of Hel, so Roy would only need to fight one of them?
>>44585667
>>44585745
>>44585977
Who gives a flying fuck about the rules? There's a bunch of HUNGRY undead crashing the moot.
>>44588228
>Who gives a flying fuck about the rules?
Guess we could be talking about all the other recent riveting developments like...??
>>44567178
Isn't Schrodinger the son of Hitler and a magical/science cat girl or something superweird like that.
