I got to thinking about rewards besides gold (or titles, or magical artifacts...) to the truly strange and unique sort of rewards players can ask for or DMs can offer.
Tell me some of your weirdest rewards, /tg/!
>>44457995
Having his soul eaten.
>>44457995
He got a rubber duckie from beyond space and time.
It spoke French, which my character could not, especially being that the French language did not exist in setting.
He rode it into battle, once, as well, despite the duckie being entirely mundane save being able to speak, and being from -somewhere- else.
Land. Always ask for land.
>>44458196
How can you get a rubber duckie big enough to ride into battle let alone get legs?
Did it squeak every time it stepped?
>>44458851
What if it's shit land?
>>44458892
Rent it out. But always get land.
>>44458892
Who cares if it's shit land, we live in a swamp! We need all the land we can get.
>>44458851
But my characters are irresponsible and would probably forget to feed a child, let alone reap benefits of having land
>>44459000
Divide your land into lots, and put it all under the authority of a manager. When your land has grown so great that you cannot walk its length in one day, build a castle and pass your lots out to men at arms in return for their loyalty, and find a priest or cleric to bless your ascension.
A pardon and forced marriage of a BBEG was pretty weird and funny. Basically we caught her and brought her for justice, and ended up requesting a pardon after a whole sort of truth and reconciliation process, and one of the players married her. The main reason was that she was potentially a huge help to a different threat to the kingdom so we didn't want to just kill or imprison her in case her cooperation was needed, and the player charged with it figured that if he was going to be watching her to make sure she was kept in check and didn't escape or secretly practice her former evil ways, he might as well just marry her. So yeah, he ended up with a shackled BBEG bride.
>>44459255
>watching her to make sure she was kept in check and didn't escape or secretly practice her former evil ways he might as well just marry her
This reminds me of the ending to the Narnia book "Horse and his boy", where the two main characters end up marrying at the end because "They argued and made up so frequently marriage simply made the whole process much simpler."
>>44459370
Wait so the horse and the boy got married?
>>44459378
What? No, this is Narnia not Equestria, the boy married some delicious arabian girl. Or something, its been a while since I read the book.
>>44459396
So who did the horse marry?
>>44459407
Another horse. Just go read the book Anon, it's really not that hard. Or read a summary even.
eldritch truth.
>>44457995
Gold titles.
>>44457995
>>44458902
But Father, I don't care about land, I just want...
I just want to...
>>44457995
to kill his daughter, with the rapping sword, and bury her in the sand.
>>44459556
Dance like you mean it?
>>44459255
So he got some top quality villain to bang?
Did he do it?
>>44459725
I don't know how top quality she was, but they fucked yeah. Unfortunately he ended up turning sort of evil because of it. The DM would say it was perhaps her corrupting influence, or the allure of power, but I know it was because of the power of her evil vagina. Probably.
>>44459784
Proof /r9k/ is correct and the vagina is evil. It leads to the corruption of good men.
>>44459806
Well I think it was something more like a trail of stepping stones leading to evil, representing possible deeds and falls to take.
The guy himself though at least had some evil tendencies towards him, so rather than take the stepping stones from one side to the other, he just took the convenient bridge right next to them. The bridge of course, being vagina. It's like the potential was always in him, and this just awakened it.
>>44459784
Did she get preggo?
Imagine impregnating your bbeg. Having a kid with the villain. Raising said kid with the ultimate evil. Growing old with your enemy.
>>44459923
They did eventually have at least one kid yeah, but she wasn't the ultimate evil of the game just one of the main ones. I remember another villain trying to have her killed thinking it would be the best time to do, but it didn't work so well since even without her magic powers due to the assassins, she was still a goliath so could physically kill them even while heavily pregnant.
>>44458087
Wat?
>>44458892
Then you need to stop doing things for india
>>44459000
yeah all those knights in the middle ages were master farmers. oh wait they didn't know how to do anything that wasn't killing dudes.
>>44459556
Ah- ah! NO SINGIN'!
>>44461859
They knew poetry.
>>44459422
You little, arrogant man. Enjoy being seared by the revelation.
>>44459784
Maybe it was because of her huuuuuuuuge... tracts of land?
>>44457995
Offered a Demon his rival's true name to look the other way for us. We even swindled him in the end and left him with nothing.
That session was all over the place.
>>44457995
Clay
>>44457995
>If you'd like we can take your soul and put it inside a chicken inside a duck inside a goat inside a tree and you'll be immortal. Sorta.
>We'll give you a honorary hobo title, whenever you're in a big city and need some help, just ask the nearest insane person with a beard and no shoes.
>It's a hunting horn but for some reason it sounds almost exactly like a dragon mating call, give it to someone you hate I guess.
>If we save the princess I want you to ban beards in your kingdom. Like, don't kill everyone with a beard, just fine them or something.
>As my reward I want you to build a temple to ME in the temple district, with a huge statue and priests and everything. Priestesses. Make that Priestesses.
I love my gaming group.
>>44457995
>strange and unique sort of rewards players can ask for or DMs can offer.
Favors are like the gift cards or IOUs of quest rewards
>guy rescues your daughter
>"Alright, you can name one thing within reason and I'll make it happen. You can name it later if you want"
>If he asks for something unreasonable, tell him to pick something reasonable or fuck off
Vassalage is a decent one. It basically means giving the PC a regular source of quest-hooks on top of the normal reward.
>guy rescues your daughter
>"You seem like a cool guy and you're great at killing people. Wanna be one of my knights?"
>"Wait, what does that mean"
>"Means you're a nobleman with land and peasants. You collect taxes, get privileges, and have a shot at higher levels of nobility. You'll be encouraged to keep adventuring, but you have to do quests for me when I ask it"
>>44462550
>>If we save the princess I want you to ban beards in your kingdom. Like, don't kill everyone with a beard, just fine them or something.
In un-related news the local dwarf population is in full riot and he death count is in the dozens.
Scholastic Lore: High Fashion
>>44462109
She had a huge amount of plot and backstory.
>>44462609
He did in fact ask for it specifically to piss off a Dwarf.
>>44462673
>>44462109
Let's be frank here, if the DM said the princess (or courtier, which is what you'd likely marry) had a fat pair of firm tits with a slender hourglass figure, wouldn't you choose that over the gold any day?
>>44462718
It really depends how much gold. Also my own gender.
>>44462718
>>44462739
>Gold or princess
Why not both?
http://pastebin.com/2PV7D2x5
>>44462550
That hobo thing sounds useful.
>Sir, the neighboring kingdoms of darkness are falling!
>What?
>Looks through telescope
>My God.
>The adventurers... they've summoned the hobos.
>>44462718
How big are we talking here?
Because the lusty barmaid usually has a jiggly pair of DDs she likes to push up with a corset.
>>44462784
I remember a time a king did something similar in our game, turned his daughter to metal to try to solve her health problems. Unfortunately he ended up creating an end-game existential threat in the process.
Daemonhood, black crusade was fun
>>44462839
>ended up creating an end-game existential threat in the process.
Go on
Was turned into a young girl by a dick is trickster spirit for my troubles, but I was very very old, so the second lease on life kinda makes up for it
>>44462933
Well because of generational inbreeding she was really weak and sickly and had a slew of health problems, so he quite literally turned her into metal. Accidentally though, instead of just simply transmuting her cell for cell, atom for atom from her normal body to equivalent metal, it made a metal version of her to be sure but rather turned her the person/being/entity into more of a consciousness that extended across metal in general.
Fortunately she wasn't aware of this at first, and seemed constrained to her metal body which was comprised of a rare, special kind of metal so without more of that kind of metal around to experiment with in relation to her body, it took awhile before she had any idea of her condition. Other people realized it before she did, and she was more or less smashed and broken apart to a multitude of small pieces, which also smashed apart her consciousness as it was shared across the pieces, and each piece was kept inside special boxes and spread across the world. Oftentimes to people who had no idea what they were, so the pieces ended up like parts of jewelry or paper weights or what have you.
In some cases people inadvertently allowed for pieces of her to either gain access to some metal or combine with other separated pieces, and eventually when she was able to properly reform, she became this ever-increasing mass of sentient metal that threatened to incorporate all metal of the entire planet and probably eventually other planets and so on and so forth.
>>44462056
And how to ride a horse.
Give a cleric the right to sell indulgences.
>>44462718
Though choice.
But considering that his daughter means I am his son in law, and thus enjoy all of the benefits of being the son in law of the king, I would probably choose the pussy.
>>44462802
>How big are we talking here?
Let's say she looks like pic related.And now you know why the king is willing to marry her off to an adventurer.
>>44459556
I WANNA ROCK
>>44463239
Maaaaan.I couldn't be happier
>>44463284
I CARRIED AN M16!
>>44462718
>princess being offered up like some slovenly trull
When I need a whore, I'll go roll on pic related.
>>44459421
At first I wanted to say it was the Arabian girl's horse, but now I'm pretty sure it wasn't.
>>44462982
Did he give you great stonking tits?
>>44463079
Okay, why the smashing though? You'd think a king would be happy with his heir being a super weapon
>>44463409
>typical streetwalker
>saucy tarts and brazen strumpets are equally likely
WHAT THE FUCK MAKES THEM TYPICAL THEN
>>44463607
It wasn't the king that shattered her. The country was in the throes of civil war, and when people found out what the king was doing they turned against it, since in a way it was a huge transgression that hearkened back to the founders of the country who at that present time were reviled.
The king would be very happy with her nature, but other people weren't.
>>44458196
>french rubber duck
Was it black and smug?
>>44460033
Dwarf fortress, please stay
>>44463650
That makes senses
a countrywide holiday in honor of the day the bard, by his telling, singlehandedly defeated bbeg #612
A spot on the king's council representing the common folk
Basically a trained pegasus with Phoenix-like respawn powers
Preferred trading status with the kingdom (no taxes, no tolls, no inspections, and 10% better prices with govt run institutions)
Papers allowing player to build a govt sanctioned fully legal whorehouse/tavern/inn.
>>44461819
Dude's character had a boner for serving his God, his God happened to be a soul-devouring abomination.
His greatest desire was to become a part of it.
Only one way for that to happen.
>>44467105
To attach to his god's side and fuse with it's flesh, all while providing sperm to impregnate his host?
>Odd/unique loot
Don't we have threads for Loot tables like that once in a while?
Yup. I still have one I did a long while ago, with shit like:
>A floating heart that never stops bleeding
>Gold platypus statue that will gravely poison anyone hit with a hind foot of the platypus.
>A pigs head full of bees on a chain
>Belt of Impressive Ass that makes you always have a great ass.
etc.
>>44467246
Mind if you put it up?
>>44467303
Yeah, sure.
http://pastebin.com/23RYMkRC
It's literally the first 100 items from that thread.
>>44467105
>>44467236
...Lilium?
>>44467323
Awesome, thanks.
I don't know how effective it'll be, but someday I'll wield that pig head full of bees...
Someday...
>>44467546
>>44467105
NO NEVER FUCKING AGAIN, WE SLEW THIS HORRID BEAST AND IT WILL STAY DEAD!!!!
>>44467648It's very effective. It's a legendary flail filled with bees. Swing it around and your enemies will not know what to do.
downside: you may get covered in angry bees if you aren't a Druid.
>>44467546
>>44467792
I'm... not, sorry. I just thought of that anglerfish sex thing when he mentioned his god.
>>44467803
Can the bees be ignored if I am in the form of a bear or a werebear? What about enchanted armor made up to look like a bear?
>>44467889
Against their racial enemy, the honey-stealing bear, bees get +2 on attack rolls.
>>44467889
Bees hate bears as much as any other creature and will viciously assault them.
>>44463239
>Horns
waitaminuteismelldemons
>>44469104
Common anon, she can't help it if her mother was a succubus
It's probably not hereditary after all
>>44467850
>>44467546
What is Lilium?
>>44462718
Never. I am not interested in disgusting cowtits. Although I'd rather have exotic spices instead of gold, it's easier to carry.
>>44471705
Story of the train wreak
>Started with someone asking what your cleric/paladin would do if their goddess revealed to them that she was in fact a redeemed succubus
>Some folks decided to start working out a religion heavily focused on love and redemption lead by a redeemed succubus goddess
>Much arguing/trolling on the subject if demons could be good/such a thing was most likely her pretending so she could nom souls
>Somewhere in there someone joked she turned souls into boob fat
>Now soul vore and becoming tit/assfat is added to the trolling
>More tolling, original goddess idea is mostly done
>New idea of a good/"good" goddess of redemption that still has some unsettling but still technically good behaviors (such as mindfucking unrepentant (or willing) evildoers into being good, using small amounts of mind control to push folks on the right path, or giving the souls of her worshipers the option of becoming one with her, existing in a state of bliss, and boosting her power as an option in the afterlife) emerges, good or "good" variations depends largely on if she's honest about the bliss part or just nomming soul
>A whole lot more trolling, people working on it declare original and new ideas done
>Some asshat starts making new threads, making sure to include the most fetishy interpretation in the OP
>More trolling, mostly on vore
>Someone jokes all the souls would make her huge and getting big enough to eat the planet
>More trolling, mostly trolls trolling trolls at this point
>New idea emerges, all devouring succugoddess elder evil big enough to swallow planets and determined to eliminate evil and bring bliss to every single soul in the multiverse by making them one with her
>More trolling, elder evil version done enough to be workable in game
>Mod finally deletes blatant troll threads during discussion of the multiverse actually being a series of matryoshka doll-like succugoddeses with each existing with in the previous iteration of reality
>>44472002
See, I saw a couple of those thread and just assumed it was a couple of people circlejerking and a troll or two, but that seems a bit excessive
>>44471384
succubusism is almost entirely based on heredity. She's a cutie, but I'd rather not have my mana drained every time I give the D
I once gave one of my PCs a Wand of Booty Call.
That same PC gave someone a dimension full of that someone's dead bodies in one of his own games. That character continues existing on top of an ever growing heap of his own corpses.
>>44472230
Someone was REALLY salty over the idea that a succubus could turn good, then people got really salty over if/if not she was just a waifu fapbait goddess
Regardless, I got a few good ideas out of it, I particularly like the "technically good goddess but has some unsettling beliefs/actions" and the "Elder evil trying to purge the multiverse of evil via human instrumentality one material plane at a time" versions of the goddess, and from what other people have said when the subject has come up in later threads I'm not the only one who's taken some of the ideas worked them into a game
>>44463639
They're not particularly saucy or brazen.
>>44471807
>listening to 10 year olds' opinions
Current character is violence obsessed, so whenever the party has to kill a important person, I take the head over all other loot. At this point, I've got a necklace of heads hanging from my ethereal lion steed, which does literally nothing for my intimidation checks but feels cool as fuck.
Also a serrated saw sword, shit's not that uncommon but easily the best loot in my current campaign, especially for the monastery of black monks we carved through.
>>44462718
How fat are we talking? I have a upper size limit.Also I question if my DM is a yurifag and why the fuck the political figures would want to set up a marriage that can't produce kids with outside influence unless my PC is just that desirable to have in the family.
>>44462550
>>If we save the princess I want you to ban beards in your kingdom. Like, don't kill everyone with a beard, just fine them or something.
Fun fact, this actually happened. Peter the Great, the first emperor of Russia, forced people to cut off their beards or pay a tax. The nobles weren't so lucky. He'd cut their beards off himself. Those who wanted to curry favour with him cut their own off. There was even one dude that Peter respected so much that he let him keep his beard.
>>44457995
"I want to BE the princess"
>>44478611
Belt of genderswap and an adoption it is
>>44462718
i dunno with gold i can buy firm tits and slender figures
>>44463409
20% chance to be a thief
why the fuck would anybody risk hiring a prostitute in a setting with that many of them being thieves
>>44481399
I think that's referring to the Thief character class (later renamed "Rogue"), not the chance for the hooker to try robbing her patron during a given encounter. Harlots and pimps are believable candidates for the thief class, even if they don't mug their patrons.
Also, that chance includes the possibility that the harlot isn't a thief herself, but simply knows or works with one. The thief could easily be her pimp, a family member, a detective who she gives information to now and then, or even a spy or assassin. The class encompasses a wide range of character types.
>>44481531
thats a possibility i suppose
>>44457995
Richard Nixon dolls.
>>44481951
Story time?
>>44458851
Last time another player got land, he just kept trying to get more. So many cities were destroyed.
>>44462718
I'd like to at least get to know her first. What if she's a shrew? What if we just don't like each other? What ifpuffy vulva?
>>44482716
Silly anon, we all knowonly whores shave their pubes.
Expect sculpted bush.
>>44461849
Neat!
>>44457995
The rights to all art supplies or supplies that could make them in the kingdom.
The king (and the dm) thought i was an idiot. I had the options of
The kingdoms entire treasury
some magical weapon of ultimate power
Any of his 3 princess daughters
Didn't take long for him to realize i own all his wood, metals, crops, livestock, gems, flora, water, dirt, and air.
Dm asked if i was willing to redo for something more reasonable. Immediately said no and welcomed my comrades to KentTopia our new base and my bitchin keep. Dm salvaged it by making the campaign army management simulator.
>>44483193
>Didn't take long for him to realize i own all his wood, metals, crops, livestock, gems, flora, water, dirt, and air.
The correct response is the king going "Ha ha NO
>>44484891
Made a public decree and everything. Signed a legal document as well. He was still king in everything but i owned all the resources including his castle since marble can make a nice creme oil paint. He would have had to public take back his word and be known a liar across the world ruining his and his bloodlines name forever.
>>44484891
>The correct response is the king going "Ha ha NO
DM-controlled royalty are not the brightest bunch.
