What are some odd or pointless items you have picked up in your journeys?
>GM says Money is no object if it is sold in this city I can buy it.
>Ask if there are any candle shops
>End up with 5000+lemon scented candles that I tote around in a bag of holding
You know that guy who takes like... thirty or forty mints as he's leaving the restaurant?
That's you.
>>44202464
You used the candles at some point, or it was just a LOL SO RANDOM moment?
>>44202450
Should have gotten citronella for when you get swarmed by insects.
>>44202825
We ended up trapped underground guess who was the only one in the party with a light source.
>>44202865
It's funny you mention that my character accidentally unleashed a hoard of spider wasp scorpions that the templars fought and died to.
Some of these are seemingly useless, some much more obviously useful. Either way, they look dope and this seems like the place to share them.
>>44202879
I was expecting something like enchasing a Ork warlord in lemon scented wax.
>>44202901
>>44202920
No unfortunately the GM never got his shit together and we ended up almost never fighting.
>>44202924
>>44202957
>>44202974
>>44202984
>>44203013
>Ring of Negligible Invisibility
The wearer of the ring is invisible, but only so long as nobody is looking at them.
>>44203034
>>44202984
>That goblin shield
I'm not sure if that's to make sure the goblin can't let go or to latch on to other folks.
>>44203067
>>44203049
Got a jacket that makes you really, really angry and a bowling ball with a magic skull in it to go with that?
>Socialite's Lozenge
A large emerald that when placed in the mouth grants +6 Charisma. However, the size of the emerald prevents the user from speaking.
>>44203094
>>44203070
Could be reversible depending on the mood of the goblin.
>>44203113
>The Terrible Timepiece
This slowly ticking clock counts the time until someone's doom. You have no idea who.
>>44203146
>>44203176
>>44203207
>>44202924
>Mysterious Orb
But what does it dooooooooooo
>>44203240
>>44203285
>>44203254Mystery Men things
>>44203308
>>44202450
I didn't pick it up, but I did give a group that I was DMing a supernaturally mundane rock. It was the most plain rock that any of them had ever seen, and they kept it.
>>44203094
It is
A mystery
>>44203333
Is there a fast way to chop these up into individual cards?
>>44203333
last one
>>44203397
The mummy wants his jar back.
>>44203390
You could do 1000 hours in gimp or just print out the whole thing and cut it. I backed mine on yellowish card paper and weathered them a bit, then cut them out.
>>44203435
fair enough
>>44203397
thanks for the dump
>>44202450
The Overclocked Lemon is not useless unless you piss it off.
Well shit guys, let me read my recent loot list from a space pirate game (Mostly trophies of another pirate)
12000 credits worth of alcohol
Signed first edition harry potter books worth 26000 credits
liberties edge(Sword made from the statue of liberty and the hope diamond) 2.6 billion credits
replica of liberties edge, 60 credits
egg shaped rock with faces on it
an ancient egyptian obelisk, 30,000 credits
a Ford Model T, 2.6 million credits
2100 ancient currency bonds (needs conversion calculated)
A child sized Bengal Tiger suit 1 million credits
100 Bengal Tiger pelts, 600,000,000 credits
Novelty 50s piano tie, 70'000 credits
1 "Fisher Price speak and spell talking chainsaw" 20,000 credits
a ruby the size of a cat, 3 million credits
A chalice made from the bottom of Napoleans skull, 700 million
Napoleans skeleton - Assorted, 50 million
solid gold couch, 700 thousand credits
16 Antique katanas, 100 thousand each
1 antique flintlock 50 thousand
1 mint green vespa, 10 thousand
1 robo bartender, 700
160 ceramic nutcrackers, 100 credits each
and a crown made from the top half of napoleans skull.
That's the stuff we CANT sell because any fence would recognize it as loot that basically ALL the pirates EVER agreed not to touch because it was in "The Pirate Queen"s trophy room.
Here's the stuff we CAN sell.
1,900,000 credits of gold coins
960,000 credits of silver coins
and a million credits worth of gems.
Some of the sillier stuff are references to previous games, but lots of these are just absurd trophies.
>>44203333
I want a ever burning torch
Also inb4 someone makes theses into a cyoa
the crown was worth 1.4 billion credits, and the dm said for a good reference, there are roughly 3 billion credits officially in circulation... so even if people would buy this stuff, there's no way they could afford most of it.
>>44203537
>cyoa
>ouch
Well, they were too cool to keep to myself. Some anon dumped them a few weeks ago, not sure where they're originally from.
>>44202450
I don't know why but everytime i hit a merchant town and have some dosh i'll by practical house items by the shit ton. Brooms, buckets, candles, some flour, a lot of twine and yarn, knitting needles, a door knob, etc. any household object a sensible household would have i had on my person at all times in a bag of holding. The best part? Its ALWAYS paid off in some form or another.
>brand new adventurers
>decide to climb a mountain for giggles
>night hits and we head for a nearby fire
>goblins. Goblins everywhere.
>run for our lives
>hit a tunnel in the mountain
>decide fuck running back to the fortified town lets hide in this tunnel
>plan was to wait for them to go down to town and we just keep climbing once they pass
>goblin squad coming down the tunnels
>party is panicking cause theres no way we're making it out alive
>a mild stroke gives me inspiration
>tie some broom sticks in a cross shape
>make 2 per party member
>throw on some clothes and spare cloak i had
>light remaining broom sticks as torches
>place brooms behind us
>hold up the scarecrows one in each hand
>walk towards goblins
>goblins run off at the sight of 18 people crowding the tunnel and a ton of torches meaning more people behind that
Totally worth all my starting money for the look on peoples faces cause the dm was the only one who actually got what i was doing.
>>44202450
Pen/pencil/charcoal/insert writing implement here and paper.
It has never been needed at all in any game but I've found always having a pen and small notebook on hand to be very useful in real life so my characters follow this tradition.
Knowing our DM though, the moment I stop bringing it along is the moment a scenario is specifically written to punish us for having it.
>>44204095
I always get chalk, because I think a DM is going to make us get lost in a dungeon but it's never come up.
>>44203333
>a bomb!
>>44204243
>>44202450
>The One-Sided Mirror
A magic 5' x 5' mirror that only reflects on one side.
>The Fist of Geb
It's a rock shaped like a fist that, if you hold it, adds additional weight to your unarmed strike by that hand.
>The Questioning Orb
Ask it a question, any question. Get a question back.
>>44203049
Did you never watch Mystery Men?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mzWN4v2Ck0s
>>44202450
Obligatory Orb of Slope Detection post
>>44203821
This is pure genius
>>44203111
Sign language
>>44202450
A non-portable hole. Someone tried to make a portable hole and fucked it up, now its just floating there, in mid air, forever.
A bag of hoarding: A botched attempt at a bag of holding, any items placed inside will be stowed in a dimension, you don't know which one but you have a small but possible chance of accidentally grabbing elemental fire or an eldrich abomination if you reach into it. You probably shouldn't ever open it.
A Blessed +5 Corroded, Rusted, Greased Partially Eaten Pickaxe. Nobody knows why this pickaxe exists, or is in such a state, and frankly nobody wants to know.
A heavily wand of wishing: This wand, once upon a time, could grant wishes to the user, however countless usages and haphazard rechargings over the years have left it dangerously unstable. When used you have no idea what will happen whatsoever, you might get what you wished for, you might get a corruption of it, you might spontaneously explode or poly morph from raw magic exposure. Seriously, this belongs in a museum, not your inventory.
The War hammer of [Insert Famous Paladin here]: Stolen out of a wealthy mans home, this war hammer, upon initial inspection, appears to be the hammer of [Name], used to cleave and smite thousands of heretics and sinners, blessed and enchanted a dozen times, it is truly a weapon worthy of a grand warrior. At least, it would be if this wasn't a fake replica of it.
