Check your equipment and get it ready for transit men, we've received new orders and it we'll get to go somewhere hopefully pleasant this time.
If we're really that lucky.
I don't know, Alice...
Do you think the inquisition will let anyone out in orbit while Amelia is running free out there?
DA! I am of sober and totally not infested with anything!
Where are we goings? I should know, am a major nowadays? Somehow...
>Holds up banner, saying "Fair Monay's for da Kills!"
>23K holds up another banner "Shoot to Deal!"
>>44188559
Do not of misjudge Valhallan ingenuity, I have of good friend for inquisiton, they will of not be problem.
>>44188559
I have a feeling that Gary's mates won't actually think what a Ordo Xeno things....
>>44188564
Headed to the planet of Sommerius sir, civilized world. Fairly pleasant from all I've seen.
>>44188564
>>44188583won't actually care what an Ordo Xenos thiks* I want to bugger myself.
I've spoken with Amorth. We really are that lucky, especially you Praetorians. Cause its almost Emperor's Day and we're headed to Praetoria.
My shit is all ready, in any case.
>>44188583
And why is a penal regiment heading for civilized world?
>>44188593Not of worryings... Have problem solver for inquisition size problems
>>44188596
Seriously?
I don't ever want to go back there, aside from not knowing what we'd even do.
>>44188596
>Alice makes a weird noise in the back of her throat, then dashes forward and attempts to envelop Gary in the manliest bear hug a tearful and incredibly happy Officer could get away with.
>>44188610
P-probably to uh...make sure...
>Alice straightens herself up and wipes at her eyes.
that uh...there aren't any Xenos screwing about or...s-something.
>>44188635
And just where have you been hiding, Ruh? Nevermind, you're being offered an opportunity to go home, by the generosity of a Thronedamn Astartes Chaplain, and you don't want it?
Why, are people gonna know that you fucked a goat?
>Saharduin continuals his protest
>23K disappears for a few seconds and returns with some guardsman who he forces to chant
"This guys are swell fellos, give them more of the emperors yellos" (Give 23K and Saharduin more monay)
>>44188655
>the Major winks his eye to the Lieutenant
Da, is good to make sure.
Is of civilized enough world to import... beverages... from Valhalla?
>>44188662
Come on guys, none of us even get paid here.
>>44188662
But we don't get paid! Or....at least...I'm not even sure....do we get paid?
>>44188671
Mhm, it's civilized enough that it's classed as a 'Civilized World', but it's still a nice place thankfully.
>>44188660
It's a praetorian thing, you wouldn't understand anyhow. I had a mate, Cameron, who had this thing with pigs. But then again, you did sister Theresia, so you're close.
>>44188677 >>44188684
>The guardsmen looks worried when you approach before 23K gives them a nudge
>They hesitantly say "But these two are heroes and deserve something!.....We think." They shuffle backwards trying to be inconspicuous
>Saharduin and 23K nod the whole way through this before Saharduins collar lights up
"The people have spoken!"
>>44188684
You don't get paid. Is penal legion, nobody gets paid.
>>44188662
You idiots! You're supposed to loot to get paid, even I don't get paid and look at all the shit I have!
>>44188677
None who don't work to take their payment for themselves get paid.
>>44188701
Have they? And how should we even pay you if we don't have money ourselves? Would prisoners of war work as currency for you two?
>>44188660just know I am fully aware I am stirring up massive shit, and will face consequences, don't worry
>>44188701
You think you deserve jack shit when you don't bother to take it from your enemies? What are you? Civilians?
What's the brief on yesterdays thread? I was sick so I missed it.
>>44188711
Do I even still count as part of the penal regiment? I think I'm technically still part of some Martian Taghmata...
>>44188731
You are part of penal regiment, no payment except loot which you are of needings to take by yourself.
As is the sisters of battle and everybody else. PENAL REGIMENT PAY NOBODY
>>44188731https://1d4chan.org/wiki/Campaign:Penal_regiment_designation_/tg/#Mr._BONES_Heresy_Ride
>>44188711
Looting? Damn this legion fell since Commissar Gaurun got taken in by the sisters hospitallers for permanent mental breakdown.
Our pay used to be being allowed to breathe for another day. Or a Bolter to the head.
>>44188728
>>44188721
>Saharduin and 23K look at each other and have a conversation with their eyes before have a scary look at the guardsmen. They both then shake their heads rejecting the offer.
>Saharduin's collar lights up as he pulls out some sort of shop catalogue titled Argosuin.
"We want these!" his centurion clad fin points at some VR equipment and a BMX as 23K bounces up and down excitedly.
>>44188699
Well first of all, I haven't gotten with her yet but I've been pretty close. Second, you're an idiot if you think she doesn't have a great body.
>>44188758
Speaking of which, has the regiment been assigned a new comissar already? It's been what a year and a half without one?
>>44188755Fuck that sounds like it was fun. I'm pissed I missed that
>>44188775
Probably for the best if you ask me Miss. I can't imagine he'd keep his sanity very long with this crew.
>>44188765
>Looks at the catalogue.
I kind of understand the VR entertainment system, but how is a Saharduin in centurion armor suppossed to even ride a BMX without breaking it?
>>44188758
>Alice inhales sharply and places a hand over her face as she walks back to her jeep.
>>44188765
Hm...since we're heading home, I think I could arrange that, -IF- you're both good boys while we're in transit. Deal?
>>44188711
WHAT.
>>44188728
WHAAAT.
>>44188754
WHAT WHAT WHAT.
THIS IS PENAL REGIMENT. YOU ARE HERE TO ATONE FOR YOUR SINS TO THE IMPERIUM OF MANKIND!
WHO DO YOU WANT TO LOOT? YOU CRAVE THE POSSESSIONS OF MUTANTS AND FILTHY HERETICS?
>>44188798
>23K keeps bouncing with excitement and the moment he hear deal. Shuts down mid jump and slumps to floor.
>Saharduin does the largest fist pump you've ever seen, before picking the Eversor up and walking over to it's stasis chamber hi-5ing (breaking arms) of every guardsman he sees on the way there.
>>44188800
Palatine, not that I agree with what the Major said nor that I back up his statement, but if, say, a guard detachment goes heretical without actually defiling their weapons, and later get killed by the penal regiment who loot said weapons, is it still heresy to free the machine spirit from heretic hands?
>>44188775
I was in navig... Nevermind. I was in nevermind.
Basically I got word they're detaching a new one soon. I'm doing the administrative things and paperwork, remember?
>>44188798
>looks at her
What's your problem?
>>44188800
Not the posession of mutant and heretic but posession of imperium, reposessed by imperium.
Besides, have permit.
>The Major pulls out a permission with the seals of the high lords of terra, basically saying "This guy is a dick but he can jack everybody's shit regardless of being a dick"
I doubt that Nyzart would want to leave his world after getting the throne back, so I'll probably make a new character in the next thread.
>>44188821
IF A HERETIC HERETICS, IS IT HERESY?
ONLY A TECHPRIEST CAN KNOW IF THE MACHINE SPIRIT IS SALVAGEABLE.
By the way, what is an assassin like you doing here?
>>44188835
Why did the highlords of Terra get this written on toilet paper, major? And is that written in Tau blood?
>>44188800
Morning Sis, hope you slept well.
>>44188754
You've really been sleeping well, Dragovich. You missed a lot.
>>44188848
Excuse me, b I think I think I know a little bit more about how a machine runs than Nine or that other one.
>mumbles
I never did catch his name...
>>44188835
THAT IS NO PERMIT, THAT IS A SCROLL
*throws it on the ground*
NO LOOTING. YOUR REWARD SHALL BE THE MERCY OF THE GOD-EMPEROR.
>>44188848
I was assigned to kill the sorcerer and make sure the Artifact ended in inquisitorial/Astartes hands. Once done I am awaiting another call for service, on the mean time I decided to stay and A) Kill enemies of the Imperium, and B) Watch over the Eversor.
>>44188848
She helped us kill the Chaos Sorceror. As for the Eversor, we found him in the back of my tank.
>>44188861
YOU ARE A XENOS. YOU ARE IMPURE. YOUR TECHNOLOGY... IMPURE TECHNOLOGY.
I NEED ALL MY MIGHT TO REFRAIN FROM PURGING YOU RIGHT HERE AND NOW.
>>44188850
No that is my shopping list. it doubles as short version of my permits.
>Grabs the official parchment which weighs around 2 pounds stating all the permissions Dmitry has acquired. Actually signed by the high lords of Terra.
This is official parcment with real permits.
>>44188867
>shows the official permit.
Calm your shit already, givings me of headache and I've been sober for a week.
>>44188861damn, I can't type today.
>>44188827
I am a Praetorian, and fucker of goats or not, you are -also- a Praetorian,
We get to go -hooooooome- and you dare to gripe like an old ninny!
Shut your flapping cunthole right this instant!
We've intentionally eased up on the discipline but if you want your ass beat then keep talking!
As for the Commissar....not my problem.
>>44188859
I sleep a lot, I sleep trough promotion, I sleep trough vodka still explosion and near death, I sleep a lot.
*over vox*
Attention, officers of the penal regiment: I am in negotiations with Inquisitor Verasii to lift the no-fly order on this airspace. As soon as it it done, we can depart for Praetoria.
>>44188898
I'm sorry, but I'm pretty sure that I can explain how a leman russ works better than "a ghost did it". And anyways, you won't have to worry about me bothering you once you leave my domain.
>>44188908
>grins
You still call it home, 'eh. Guess I've been here too long.
Commissar will be your problem when he gets here. I survived Gauruns predecessor, I survived Gaurun. You're still new. Enjoy the lack of discipline while you can.
>>44188944
You're staying, ambassador? I thought you wanted to learn more of the Imperium across the galaxy.
>>44188976
No, I have agents for that now. Besides, I have to investigate this dark eldar business.
>>44188912
>The Praetorian Troopers still on the ground start cheering enthusiastically at the news, before breaking into a heartfelt rendition of 'He's a jolly good fellow'
>>44188970
>Alice's grin stretches even wider than Ruh's.
Not my problem if I'm not a Guardsman bellend. But you have fun with him.
>>44188970
Ruh let me remind you that those Praetorians have done nothing wrong, they just got stuck with us.
>>44189001
Nah, i'm having fun with the navigator.
>winks
Good luck if you think just cause you're a Lieutenant he can't make your life sour though.
>>44188992
So will your regiment stay attached to the inquisition after you visit Praetoria? Either way, I'll be sure to keep in touch.
>>44189038
Pretty sure someone is moving in on your territory scumbag Steve.
>Alice sticks her feet up on the dashboard, the grin only intensifying.
Do you listen? I said, not my problem if I'm -not a Guardsman-. You're embarrassing yourself.
>>44189012
Ah yes, I know a lot of people here who didn't do nothing wrong.
There was this guy who used to hear that in his sleep, "dindu nothing wrong". He was a latent psyker and Gaurun blammed him.
Unlike a certain other runaway psyker problem I've heard off.
>>44189070
It probably will, just make sure your "agents" introduce themselves as members of your dinasty first, so they don't get shot on sight.
>>44189084
The reason that little bitch got away is because we have Necrons out there who claim to be friendly. Also she turned out to be more powerful than we thought.
>>44189078
Then who do you answer to, pray tell?
>uncorks small flask and swings back something that smells like amasec.
To be fair the main reason i don't want to go back is that every single person I knew there is dead or gone. Don't feel like wandering into a ghost town of memories.
>>44189119
Not to worry, my forces are scouring the planet for her. If she's on Gospyria, we'll know.
I am of bored now...
I want to kill something, or drink, but I can do neither...
It's sad.
>>44189119
Elena told me something about that. That's what happens with psykers and why we have black ships.
Is she dealt with though?
>>44189159
I can hardly believe it occurred though. I mean Amelia was always so hell-bent on fighting back the heresy and following the codes of conduct of the Imperium...
>>44189140
Well, if you feel like serving the Inquisition, be my guest, cause that's where it looks like things are going for us.
>>44189140
When the Exorcists Chaplain....Amorth I believe his name is, is done conversing with that Ordo Xenos Inquisitor, Malleus actually.
Eh, I know the feeling, but you can't let the past control your future.
>Alice pulls the ever present flask of fresh tea from the back of the jeep and pours herself a cup.
Want some? Oh but yes, I'm fairly certain that one of the Guardsman -is- trying to court Navigator Elena. I think it was the blank of all people.
>>44189171
Gone Emprah knows the fuck where. And no, it's not quite like that. Because apparently she was a Dark Eldar captive for awhile, and somehow their torture made her a psyker.
>>44189166
Here, this is from a new batch made from a Broodlood. It's a good bit smoother than my usual stuff.
>>44189213
They what?!
Can they really induce psychic potential into people through torture now?
>>44189213
That's not all. Greely and I found a dark eldar... device... in bastion. They were looking for her.
>>44189248
That's just what I heard. But there's no way she would have gone unnoticed in the Schola.
>>44189201
Eh, well I drink to your promotion then I guess. Thanks for the tea but I grew used to something a bit... stronger.
Though be my guest if you want to spike your tea a bit.
And I'd like to see that blank get too close to a navigator without the warp shitting all over.
>>44189213
And you believe that cock and bull story?
>>44189273
Well, do you have a better explanation, smartass?
>>44189273
I'm just saying what me and the boys saw, don't know if it's possible, don't want to imagine the logistics.
>takes a sip from the cup and pours a second for LIX.
Oh...hey Lixxy....
>>44189313
Ah! A-alice! He-hello!
>"She called me Lixxy"
>Blush
>>44189285
She was never a Sister to begin with? It's not a bad cover, nobody would pry too much in the affairs of a Sister.
Which other sisters do we know? Does she act at all like Theresia? Could she even use a flamethrower properly?
People who get taken by Dark Eldar, they never make it back.
>>44189313
She... may be possessed, as well.
>>44189231
>The Major accepts his offer, taking a sip of the beverage
Not bad Gary, not bad.
>>44189328
>>44189313
>looks at both
>takes another swing from the flask
I'm too sober for this.
>>44189329
People keep saying these Eldar are dark. What makes them dark? The race wasn't very fractious before I entered hibernation.
>>44189332
What, the Navigator? Don't be daft mate. We'd have noticed by now.
>>44189328
>gestures to the tea on the dashboard and pats the passenger seat of the jeep.
You'll need to meet the folks when we get home. You'll have fun.
>>44189357
Well... the Eldar are just elusive Xenos at best, petty pirates at worst. The Dark Eldar raid, pillage, take people and disappear to leave no trail of their existence except for corpses heavily brutalized and carnaged people. They also apparently enjoy torture.
>>44189357
Two kinds of ELDAR SHITNUGGETS
One kind rapes and pillages, the other kind just kills you.
AND THEY ARE BOTH SCUM
DARK SHIT XENO TRASH RAPE AND PILLAGE AND TORTURE AND DESTROY
REGULAR PIECE OF POINTY EARED XENO TRASH ONLY SHOOT YOU IN HEAD FROM FAR FAR AWAY!
>>44189329
Or what if the Dark Eldar let her go on purpose? Those shits are pretty insidious.
>>44189345
Pretty good huh?
>>44189371
>Gets into the Jeep.
>Gives a questioning look.
Wait...
What do you mean with "the folks"? Your local friends?
>>44189371
No, Amelia.
>>44189376
They must use that pocket dimension of theirs.
>>44189389
It is rather good... I must say, if you ever become a civilian, I might advise you to set up a brewery... I know this one rogue trader, don't ask how, he could use a man of your talents.
If you live long enough to retire.
>>44189038
Possibly, apparently she started dicking around with the Artefact, aye?
>>44189391
No no no no, mother and father of course. Maybe Aunties and Uncles too depending on which Regiments are back in time.
>>44189378
A STATEMENT I CAN GET BEHIND WHOLEHEARTEDLY.
SHITTY POINTY-EARED THIN-FACED FAGGOTS THE BUNCH OF THEM.
I AM ANGRY.
ANGRY ABOUT ELDAR.
>>44189418
>"It's happenning."
>"It's official."
>Gasp.
>Blush.
A-Alice I...
I... I feel... I feel honored...
...
...and a bit scared...
>>44189429
DEATH TO ALL XENOS
BY THE WAY WHILE YOU WERE AWAY I ORDERED A RAG TAG MASSACRE OF FILTHY BLUE XENOS
I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I AM OF SHOUTING IN ZEAL
THIS FEELS GOOD
IS THAT WHY YOU DO IT ALL THE TIME?
>>44189429
>raises her mug as if to toast.
Hear hear! To oppose the Emperor's will is to be destroyed!
>>44189378
*comes out of medical facilities, kneels down* I am patched up and ready for duty, milord! How can I serve?
>>44189429
Aren't we all, sis, aren't we all... Say, now would be a good time for you to see to my spiritual well being, wouldn't it?
Your quarters or mine?
>>44189449A shouting !NotSpaceRussian. Why I love this?
>>44189449
EXCELLENT! LET THEM KNOW THE EMPEROR'S GLORY! THIS GALAXY IS OUR GALAXY! THEIR PLANETS - ARE OUR PLANETS!
WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHOUTING? THIS IS MY NORMAL VOICE.
>>44189448
Don't need to be scared lass, granted, dad does look more than a bit intimidating when he's pissed off, but he won't be at this time of year.
>looks LIX over then shrugs her pack off and starts digging through it.
>>44189429
You know, for once I agree with you on something.
>>44189467
>Stares at the guardsman
I would say lick my boots but I'm afraid you would of doings it.
Tell me, if I said shoot yourself what would be your answer?
>>44189483Based Not-SpaceRussian
>>44189485
THIS IS MY SHOUTING VOICE?
YOU HAVE STRONG VOICE
I ADMIRE THAT GREATLY
>>44189476
OF COURSE, THERE IS STILL TIME BEFORE WE LEAVE! LET US GO TO MY QUARTERS, IT IS MORE COMFORTABLE TO HEAR YOUR CONFESSION.
>>44189476
>>44189514
>looks at both
>starts drinking frantically
Too sober... Way too sober
>>44189513
I... I... I would humbly decline, milord... Forgive me for being a disappointment, milord...
>kneeling intesifies
>>44189493
It's just...
wow...
I mean... w-would they accept this? Would they accept me? An assassin? Someone who people hardly consider even human anymore?
>This last bit whispering:
I-in theory it's heresy to get engaged for m-me, w-won't they consider it heresy t-to have their girl going out with- with a... a freak like me?
>>44189514
Lead the way, Sis...
>smiles
>lays a caressing hand on her armor plated backside
>>44189560
What is his problem?
GREETINGS WEAK FLESHLINGS
My War Maniple was recently obliterated by a freak plasma accident, and I am reporting here to continue the sacred creed of my glorious and most exclusive covenant until I can be collectedly by my fellow Techpriests and returned to my Forge World for re-integration into a suitable Maniple.
I must report to your commanding officer for confirmation of my transference into your ranks, should he/she find it agreeable that I stay here for the time being. Where can I find him/her?
>>44189578
Wh- how did you get in the planet? There's an inquisitorial blockade!
>>44189560
Stand up and have a drink you tosser, this is a time of celebration!
>>44189561
Yes they would, it's not the mask, it's the person behind it.
But one step at a time lass, lets just focus on relaxing once we get to Praetoria, aye? Now, out of the jeep for a sec and stand still.
>Alice climbs out of her seat and over the bonnet to stand at the passenger side of the jeep.
Call yourself a freak again and I'll dump a flask of cold tea on you.
>>44189602
I was part of the Inquisitorial blockade fellow techpriest.
We were spending our idle time tinkering with a plasma battery on the ship we were stationed on when unbelievably and completely without warning it detonated and destroyed all my brothers.
>>44189619
Celebration? Does that involve... Games?
>>44189572
*makes a sound that almost resembles something feminine like a soft giggle*
*walks back with Gary to the barracks where she has her chambers*
>>44189619
I didn't mean to-
It's just peopel ussually think that we're-
...
>Decides it's best to not talk about it.
S-stand still for what?
>>44189652
*sighs and has an expression of utter satisfaction, not to mention it looks like there's a Vanquisher cannon in his fatigues*
>>44189535
DA you have right idea!
>pulls out vodka bottle
>>44189560
You are of suitable for penal regiment, stupid enough to disobey orders, smart enough to disobey stupid orders. Have a drink, and get your feet up already!
>offers a drink to the guardsman
>>44189620
Sorry, I'm not a techpriest. Perhaps you've heard why you were part of the blockade?
>>44189646
It can if you want, have fun, relax, do whatever.
>>44189656
>Alice opens her left hand to reveal a length of measuring tape.
Need to take your measurements obviously. No guest of House Wellesley is going to wear their work clothes to during the holidays.
I'll need to get Gary and presumably Theresia too, but...I'll be waiting for that. They're...otherwise engaged.
>>44189727
W-what? Y-you want me to r-r-r-re-replace m-my clothing wh-whilst visiting yo-your home? O-out of the temple? I-I could just morph so-some clothing and...
>>44189715
Yes, milord!
>>44189727
If I... Want?
>>44189715
>upon seeing the bottle
Oh God-Emperor it's splendid.
>>44189727
Guests? What? What are you two planning.
>>44189721
I am aware, there is a, most unfortunately, peaceful Xenos Empire on the planet.
You match the exact description of one of the tech-priests assigned to this regiment... Perhaps it's time I updated the facial recognition in my optics.
>>44189715
YOU
Are you the commanding officer here?
>>44189727
Have I arrived in the midst of MERRYMAKING? This is MOST INCONGRUOUS with my creed, but I suppose it will have to make do for the time being. Perhaps adaptions can be made to my interpretation.
>>44189772
I am not planning anything! I'm as surprised as anyone!
>>44189784
Da? What is it?
>>44189758
Have drink!
>he offers a shot glass of vodka for the guardsman
>>44189772
You! Also have drink!
>The major offers a shot glass of vodka for Ruh aswell.
>Where the bottle went and where the glasses came from, nobody knows.Krieg space magic is what I'd say if kenneth was around...
>>44189802
>grins and offers his flask
Just a hint, you might need more of this soon.
>>44189756
Of course....I do...you uh...y-you really think you'll be expected to um...wear your b-bodysuit over the celebrations?
>steps forward and attempts to take LIX's measurements.
I'd loan you one of my uniforms, but you're...um...b-better equipped...s-so to speak.
>>44189772
I'm obviously planning to go home and spend time with the family.
>>44189784
Uh, you did sir, we received excellent news sir.
>>44189830
I am joining your regiment, this is non-negotiable save for a confirm or deny on your part.
>>44189847
>Accepts the offer and takes a gulp to relax her nerves.
>>44189858
>Doesn't resist in Alice's attempt to take her measurements.
Alice it's just... you remember what I told you of I enjoy being myself out of assignements r-right? That I enjoy having my physical form as it actually is? I'm... I'm scarred Alice. Under the skin suit I mean...
>>44189861
So what you're saying is it is negotiable but only for me who can now of deny or allow you to tag along?
Tell me, ever killed filthy xenos?
Ever killed heretic?
Ever killed traitor?
Ever killed anything?
I need killers, hardened fighters. Not wimps who cannot handle their fightings.
So, I ask you one thing, are you what I need, or are you what I don't need?
Answer one question, get answer to your question.
>>44189858
OMNISSIAH WHY HAVE YOU CURSED ME SO? FIRST YOU TAKE MY BROTHER-PRIESTS AND NOW YOU PREVENT ME FROM FULFILLING MY DIVINE PURPOSE?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO
++ FUCK | SHIT | UP ++
WHEN ALL AROUND ME IS POINTLESS MERRYMAKING?
>Shakes his mechadendrites at the sky and holds his buzzsaw axe above his head.
>>44189911
Sir, with all due respect. I am a Myrmidon, I am built to ++ FUCK | SHIT | UP ++.
If you want a killer, there are non finer within the Omnissiah's sight.
>>44189914
Yeah I do feel the lack of fighting a little, getting restless.
Anyhow, I'm off. Going to see how Elena is doing. Maybe kicking the pariah for good measure.
>>44189902
We've all got our scars lass, you just can't let them worry you.
In a way, your scars are badges of honour, you 'earned' them serving our Emperor.
If it bothers you -that- much, then just be yourself, minus the scars.
But none of us will be bothered.
>finishes with the measurements and tucks the tape away.
Would you prefer a standard uniform or something black, perhaps?
>>44189999
B-black is good.
It's just... I feel like I'd be lying to myself if I removed my scars.
>>44189830
*takes it and happily drinks the vodka* Thank you milord! It was very kind of you, milord.
>>44189948
Da is all I want hear. You're in.
However we have distinct lack of things to kill. Which annoys me, have to kill traitors soon, but no traitors in sight.
Is of terrible!
>>44190026
And stop with the "milord" crap, I'm a Major, not the God-Emperor of mankind...
>>44190013
How would you be lying to yourself? Scars or not, you're still you. If you -want- to 'remove' them, then do so. If you don't, don't do so, remember, you've got choices.
>>44189911
>>44190026
Heh heh heh, hey Major, if this guy is this easy with the 'Mi'Lords' around us, just wait till he sees our transit.
Is the medical officer here? My work is finished.
>>44190057
I swear to God-Emperor if it is a ship full of milord this and milord that...
>>44190044
Checked and understood Major.
Perhaps in the meantime till we can kill again I may be able to find a less lethal interpretation of ++ FUCK | SHIT | UP ++.
>>44190097
Well they won't -want- to be addressed by Mi'Lord, but well....a Guardsman doesn't simply address one of the Emperor's Angels by anything else.
>>44190044
Erm... Yes, sir. Of course, sir.
>>44190057
Our... Transit, milady?
>>44190057
It's not like that. I want to be who I am... I don't want to forget who I am... the scars are part of me, but it's also something that might not be pleasant to see for... well your parents for example, my right arm is completely covered by them. Marks left behind from both my assignements, my training and... my equipment. I just hope it's cold in Praetoria right now so any clothes I get do actually cover them...
>>44190115
Euhh... da? I am of no techpriest but can of figure that out maybe...
>>44190125
Wait? How drunk was I? We're about to board an astarte ship?
Oh shittings me!
>>44190135
Just say Major, da? Is of easy, and formal
>>44190147
Yes, major!
>>44190142
Then wear them, like I said, it won't bother any of us. And yes, uh...black version of our dress uniform and a black overcoat okay with you?
>>44190147
Aye, the Exorcists are going to take us to Praetoria. We'll be staying there over the holidays. Which means the usual suspects will have to -behave- Throne damnit.
>>44190225
I... yes.
And Alice?
Thank you.
>>44190167
Finally you got it.
>>44190225
The usual suspects either behave, or take bolter shell to... wherever the bolt decides to land. My aim sucks when I'm drinking.
>>44190225
Would be the first time that a planet I visit doesn't turn into some war-torn hellhole.
>>44190279Every time...
>>44190248
Think nothing of it, we all deserve to relax, right?
And from what you've said you haven't relaxed at all since before you joined us.
>>44190257
Mhm, they shall suffer....-if- they misbehave.
>>44190279
Aye, we'll get to....be at ease, truly at ease. If even only for a few days.
>>44190248
>>44190225
Y'know, in all my years in the Guard, then the Taghmata and Legions, I've never seen something like what you two have appear.
It's quite beautiful, and would bring a tear to my eye if I had any.
>>44190349
T-thank you s-sir, I do uh....t-try. I-it's all we can do.
>Alice blushes and hides her mug behind the mug of her mug.
>>44190349
>Blushes.
Just don't go around speaking a-about it... in case an inquisitor drops its ear into the conversation...
>>44190381
Don't worry Miss, I try not to spend time hanging around Inquisitors anyway. Time travelling robots are generally not well liked by them I hear.
>>44190375
I'm sure it is sweet girl, and what a thing it is to do.
>>44190429
A THALLAX! HERE? OF ALL THE PLACES?
I MUST EXAMINE YOU.
WHAT ARE YOUR ARMAMENTS? HOW ARE YOU STILL OPERATIONAL? ARE THERE MORE OF YOU?
>>44190429
Y-yes sir. As the Emperor wills it sir.
Should uh...come join us for the celebrations sir.
>>44190461
Uh...
Well, my current armament is this Photon Thruster with chain bayonet.
I'm still operational because I was locked in a storage closet for several millenia.
No, there don't appear to be any others floating around with me.
And no, you can't look at me. The other techpriest was going to have a crack at it, but I can't seem to find him.
>>44190494
OMNISSIAH BE PRAISED.
A GENUINE PHOTON TRHUSTER? PRAISE BE HIS NAME.
MAYBE THERE'S A REASON I CAME HERE AFTER ALL.
ONE DAY THALLAX, YOU AND I SHALL++ FUCK | SHIT | UP ++ TOGETHER!
>>44190494
Other Techpriest? You must mean Churchill, sir.
>>44190526
Uh, yeah. I'm sure we will pal. I'm sure we will.
>>44190474
>>44190529
Aye that's who I mean. I trust the fellow to poke around inside my squishy bits without tearing me apart.
And celebrations? I would love to take part, though my ability to actually have fun has been significantly diminished in the past ten thousand or so years. But I'm sure it will be lively enough.
>>44190579
I just hope the troublemakers behave. I can't say we'll be lenient at all if they do....anything, on...well you get the idea.>inb4 Rama is blessed in that if he stumbles into a closet he'll come out of the next nearest closet as human Rama, but remembers everything.
>inb4 he can switch back to Thallax Rama if he does the same thing again.
That would amuse me honestly.
I hope it's ok if I briefly commandeer an exorcist to undo the blockade and let you guys do the emperor's day special
>The inquisitor stares up at the Exorcist. She is by no imagination a small woman, but he's a goddamn space marine. Still, she isn't backing down. She has the Deathwatch behind her. Literally.
"I Entrust you! Entrust you with dangerous chaos artifact! And what is of happen? Crazy bitch-sister-traitor makes off with it shitting and giggling and spewing chaos bullshit-"
>The space marine interrupts her.
"Inquisitor. You aren't fooling anyone with that stupid put-on Valhallan accent. Our chaplain gave his word the Praetorians will go home for Emperor's day, and that is what they will do."
"This is stupidest thing we could possibly have a shooting war over. I am not so arrogant as to waste Emperor's currency in pissing match. Penal legion can go on holiday before next assignment. And is Hussarite accent."
>She pauses to take a drag off a cigar
"I will allow this, but Exorcists are to assist in finding rogue psyker and securing thronedamned artifact. Preferably destroyed if possible. And leave new Imperial Ally alone."
>The chaplain grumbles.
"What is of matter. You hate Chaos, they hate Chaos, I hate Chaos. We are all on same page here. Chaos is enemy of all things, and if Xenos can be aimed at Chaos and not Imperium, all the better. Besides, I have contingencies if things go wrong. Tell Anna and Greely to behave themselves on holiday. I will be here for a while into future, so they will keep in touch via astropath."
>>44190687ah fuck i didn't fix that last "chaplain." It's just a messanger from the chaplain, i'm not touching anyone's characters
>>44190653
Hey I always behave. So what's going on?
And now we prepare our equipment for Amorth to tell us that we're good to go. And then the fun begins.
>>44190781
The Exorcists are taking us to Praetoria and we'll be staying there for the celebrations, after that, we'll be heading off to Sommerius in a different ship.
>>44190812
What sort of planet is Praetoria? I regret that I cannot join you for your celebration.
>>44190812
Wow. that's better than I expected. First time i'll be celebrating not in a warzone in forever. Oh I better start packing. When do we leave?
>>44190860
As soon as the chaplain gives us authorozation to take off.
>>44190845
Why are you not joining us on Praetoria? Or will you just not celebrate it?
>>44190888Authorization*
>>44190687
What is the matter, Inquisitor, is that you are compromising the Imperial Creed. Xenos are never to be trusted under any circumstances. You do not fight monsters with monsters, you purge all the monsters with men, and with honest fire and steel! You radicals endanger the integrity of the Imperium with your gambles.
Regardless, I will honor the pact you have made with the Necron, but only as long as it is recognized. The moment it is overturned, the xeno will be prosecuted by the Deathwatch.
For now, you have my thanks for allowing the Guardsmen on this world to leave. I told them I would help, and I mean to do just that.
Sergeant Konstantine, send the word for the Guardsmen to assemble. The Praetorians and their first platoon may join us aboard our cruiser, and have their transport ship take the rest.
Good day, Inquisitor. The Emperor Protects.
>>44190653I did specifically create the cold cogitator psycopath alter ego so that Rama somehow gets a new body there will still be something to control the Thallax. With the new Myrmidon though... Maybe a Emperor's Day miracle will get our old drop sarg a new body.
>>44190894
No, I must stay here in case these dark Eldar make the mistake of returning to my dynasty.
>>44190888khorne confirmed
>>44190327
That's one way to put it.
>>44190845
It's a Hive World and I'd be dishonest if I said she didn't have her problems.....but....everywhere has problems.
Still, as long 1st Platoon behaves, we'll take care of them. If not....we will not be lenient
>>44190860
We'll be leaving shortly...as soon as....
>Alice trails off as an indicator on the jeep's Vox set starts blinking.
>She pulls a Vox headset on and flicks a pair of switches.
"Read you loud and clear, go ahead and send."
"Mhm.....mhm, I will, we'll be up shortly. Mhm"
Alright, First Platoon, grab your gear and get into formation! We've got clearance and the Transports are inbound!
>>44190888
I don't have much time then
>>44190950
Well from what I know of them they just look for slaves and souls. I'm pretty sure that Necrons will make bad slaves and do you guys have souls?
>>44190980
What's the Pantorian version of 'behaves'?
>>44190980
Yes, milady!
>>44191001
You don't fight, you don't steal, you don't insult your hosts and most importantly you -DO NOT KILL ANYTHING-. You do any of those and you'll be fed your own teeth....for starters...
>>44190980
>LIX salutes then winks at Alice.
I've got my stuff ready, meet you at the thunderhawk. I'll save a seat for you.
>>44190980
>emerges from Theresia's room, slightly disappointed, apparently things did not quite go all the way, but they went a little way...
>loads up his loose stuff into the Metal Slug, straps his still to the back of it, and drives it out and into the belly of the Thunderhawk
>>44190980
>Boards while grumbling and muttering under his breath.
...fucking...."no killing"... fleshlings....
>>44191032
This is going to be very hard.
>Gathers up a huge amount of supplies and carries it into the back of the thunderhawk.
>>44190980
Well, let's head out then.Wait wait wait, are we wrapping up the thread? Because the everyone boarding the thunderhawk game is generally what we do when the thread is done. I am still feeling under the weather, so I'm not complaining that much.
>>44191104I believe we're going to continue on board the ship.
>>44191050
>The pair of Chimeras along with the three Jeeps drive up the ramp and squeeze themselves together, while the crews kill their engines and start conversing amongst themselves.
>Alice herself jogs up the ramp and drops into a seat next to LIX.
>>44191104We'll still be milling around on the Exorcists Cruiser for a bit and I -think- getting the actual journey to Praetoria done so we can go straight to celebrations on Monday.
>>44190916
Emperor Keep and Protect you too, Chaplain. We may not agree on methods, but we are on same team.
>After he leaves..
Thronedamn Exorcist thinks he can condemn me after he let Chaos get artifact. The self-righteous prick would see Imperium fall for sake of his dogma.
But still, we are on same team, so I will make nice. With friends like these...
>>44190980
Dum di dum...
>whistles as he casually strolls around and onto the nearest transport
>>44191139Well, I can't continue participating in the thread so the Thallax will be in rest mode aboard the cruiser.The Myrmidon too, as I've been behind him as well if you hadn't noticed.See you next week.
>>44191196
So Major. What do you even do on Emperors Day? I've always been in combat on it so I don't really know what to expect.
This whole thing seems like some sort of dream, or fantasy. Guardsmen simply aren't this lucky....
>Alice again reaches for her flask and pours herself a fresh mug.
>>44191331
Everyone gets lucky eventually sweet girl. Everyone gets lucky eventually.
>>44191331
True. But you're also a one in a million kind of guardsmen.
>>44191303
I'd like to know too. I remember only the blood games... *shudders*
>>44191331
I haven't had the opportunity to enjoy an Emperor's day since I joined the Arbites.
So how do they celebrate it on Praetoria? On Monovia, people gather their family and friends around a Pictviewer and watched the latest Bloodgames they could find recordings of, and generally got drunk and made asses of themselves.
>>44191373
>>44191384
>blushes faintly and offers a slight smile.
I-I....I suppose it is as the Emperor w-wills it.
Mhm, as the Emperor wills indeed.
>>44191303
Spend time with friends and family, eat, drink, maybe give presents. Be like normal citizens of the Imperium.
>>44191392
I only remember the Emperors Day shellings *shivers* I was from an Airborne regiment, the bombs always fell on us.
>>44191303
I'm making progress. The modifications are over and I already tested it on some smaller animals. A human should be able to deal with an higher exposure, bit I want to make sure everything works. I was able to scan some increased psychic activities in their brains. Still the majority of them died and in one case the implant released warp dust in the brain of the rat.
I'm still confident that these problems will be fixed soon.
>>44191428
Mhm, much like that, although depending on the family there might be more time spend on Military history...sparring, target practice....mine'll have plenty of that.
Military through and through.
>>44191436
Sounds like you had it harder than me. Dying at random, killed by who knows what seems just... Scary.
>>44191428
On Helios we would all gather with our family and there would be a hunt of the lesser xeno's on the planet. The family with the biggest kill would be rewarded with gifts from the Admech. Fun times, well until i joined up.
>>44191430
That sounds oddly nice.
>>44191481
It's going quite well then. Once we get aboard the ship. I'll see what else I can find for you to test.
>>44191501
I remember my family on Harakon.
The singing, the home cooked meals, and that special warmth you get when everyone is finally together again just in time for Emperor's Day. They always let everyone who was on world off for Emperor's day y'know? No one had to be on base if they had somewhere to go back to. And we always invited those who didn't to come stay with our families. I remember the looks on my parents faces when I brought twelve orphan Warhawks home with me for the holidays. That was quite the night.
I hope I get to see them again one day. It's been longer than any of you could imagine.
>>44191602
Mhm, it's family that makes it worthwhile.....maybe we'll be able to head towards Harakon next year maybe?
Would certainly be nice.
>>44191701
Heh, that would certainly be a blast from the past for them.
I wouldn't want them to see me like this though. They don't deserve that, and I don't deserve seeing my mother without feeling the warmth of her arms around me.
There is, also, the question of living to see next Emperor's Day...
I'm going to go rest for a while. Wake me when we get there sweet girl.
>stares at the floor with a sad look
>>44191753
>blushes again.
U-uh...yes sir.
Still....you guys should enjoy yourself while we're there....as long as you follow the laws in full.
I'll....uh....need to take care of some business once we land.
I'll be around for the celebrations though.
>Alice focuses her stare at the otherside of the bay as the Thunderhawk closes it's ramp and takes off, with the few Praetorian aircraft following close behind.
>>44191874
> waves
Goodbye, friends! It's been... an experience!
>>44191948
>hears Nyzart and waves back as the ramp closes.
Take care of yourself!I really hope we get to come back here later(Possibly Tyranids/Eldar?). Nyzart is a fun character.
>>44191874
>takes a pair of pills, shakes his head
You don't need to stick with us. Like you said, go have fun with your family. Don't worry I'll keep Dolan and them outta trouble, well I'll at least try to.
>>44191948
>waves
Goodbye Nyzart. I hope we meet again, someday.
>>44191948
>Bows respectfully as the ramp closes.
Farewell, ambassador
>>44192006
Sorry Jackson, I shouldn't be so moody, but all this talk of family and coming home has be a bit...'down', y'know? I need to tell....
>sniffs a bit and hides her head in her hands.
n-need to tell a lot of uh...l-loved ones that their Guardsmen weren't quite as....'l-lucky' as mine.
Are all boarded then?
That Inquisitor... I hate that I had to be formed in such a radical way myself. It is my fault that the artifact was lost to the witch, despite my efforts. I shall do what I can to retrieve it, but I shall not tell Verasii.
>>44192106
>Alice hastily pushes herself to her feet to stand at attention.
All personnel on board Mi'Lord....I feel I must thank you for your generosity Mi'Lord, even if Arthur....err, Captain Wellesley already has.
ehy people,was busy with comics school, let me grab something to eat, I will be here in maybe half an hour.
If the thread does not die before that I mean.
>>44192082
Hey don't think of it like that. You brought this many home and that's a feat that few officers can claim. When we all signed up we all knew there was little to no chance we'd see home ever again. The Emperor has given you a gift and you shouldn't waste it being sad. Now go have enough fun for you and for all the men who couldn't be here today.
>>44192171No worries man, we'll do our best to keep the thread alive. It's going to be...interesting.
>>44192184
You speak the truth, but.....I feel I owe it to them. After all, if it was me that...d-didn't make it...I'd want my family to know...
>>44192161
Very good, we are now en route to the transit point. The transport for the rest of your regiment will follow, before making its way to Bakka.
>>44192214
>Holds her hand.
>She knows she almost didn't make it
>>44192106
If you cannot destroy it, find someone who can. That's what really matters. It has to be destroyed.
>>44192214
I know how you feel. If that's what you want to do I can't stop you. Just make sure that you have some fun, alright.
>>44192311
Not telling Verasii about... what?
>>44192217
Aye Mi'Lord. Hm...I believe I must inform you, that myself and Captain Wellesley would like to make ourself of use to your Chapter, or, more officially the Ordo Malleus as Stormtroopers if you would have us.
We feel that a few troops more adequately trained to combat the....alarming number of Daemons we seem to face would be an asset.
This....and someone will need to do the boring work for RSM Lawzom to help him keep his sanity with his new rank.
>>44192295
>>44192325
>Squeezes LIX's hand and nods to Jackson.
I'll have fun if you do.
>>44192356
Oh the Chaplain has issues with how the Inquisitor does things. Verasii wants the damned artifact destroyed on the off-chance it's a sort of anchor for Virmanthas, or failing that, put somewhere no one can find it. She says she's working on getting Nyzart to prepare a Tessaract for it's new home.
>>44192365
>*smiles*
But you said I couldn't get in trouble.
>*chuckles*
>>44192365
Say what would you say it's the optimal place to have fun on praetoria, Alice?
>>44191303
Everyone is dead, so I drink to their memory. They are with the emperor now.
>>44192428
Verasii is right.
And you are a cheeky double faced grot, Greely, I hope Verasii throws you out of an airlock as spon as I am able to brong her proof of this. You will see.
>stomps away, whining about being hungry and not having anyone feeding her.
>>44192456
...Then have as much fun as you can without breaking the law, or the rules.
>>44192459
There's a pretty decent district next to my family holdings. Shops, parks, entertainment, including a few good Holoplex's....oh and the pubs, the pubs.....
>>44192465
I think I'll join you in that this year.
>>44192511
I... I'm actually a bit nervous. I've ussually been doing my job during my past Sanguinalias. This is... well... a chance to have fun and with other people too...
>>44192365
I'm not doing the paperwork for a throne-damned transfer.
>>44192479
Damn Kids don't understand politics. Someone has to destroy the thing, and I don't know why the exorcists would.. Fuck it, i'll take it up with the chaplain.
>Storms off
>>44192513
I would be honored.
It includes lots of drinking though...
>>44192511
So are we headed for your homeworld Lieutenant?
I am honored if it is so...Dmitry been sleeping too long, losings of accent
>>44192605
I got a lot of men to drink for. I hope you have enough
>>44192311
>>44192428
The Inquisitor and I agree that the damned thing must be destroyed. She should have destroyed it to begin with. What I object to is this alliance with xenos. It matters not, that Necron is no friend of humanity.
You mentioned one who could destroy the artifact, Throne Agent? How could he do better than the Librarians of my Chapter?
>>44192365
I would not take you on as serfs, they must be young when they begin their service to us. However, you could be inducted into the Ordo Malleus. But that decision is not mine to make, because although my Chapter is very much connected to that Ordo, we are not a part of it. I shall contact them on your behalf.
As for Sergeant Lawzom, yes, I agree. He is capable of doing much greater work than he realizes.
>>44192624
I have an entire regiment, a family, and a few friends to drink for.
And I drink every day for them.
For emperor's day, I drinkings until pass out. And my Liver is artificial.
Hope you know how not to die from poisoning yourself.
>>44192640
You think we didn't try?
>Pushes a sheaf of papers into his hands
Here's a list of all the things that DIDN'T work.
>>44192667
I see.... this device is much more resilient than most. The Sorceror Virmanthras shows his hand by going to such lengths to protect it.
But who is this other you mentioned?
>>44192640
And there are contingincies in place for the Necron if and when things don't work out. Verasii's no fool, just pragmatic.
>>44192667The Chaplain could almost not even hurt it and it self repaired by draining souls, you pretty much need a convention of the emperor's most holy to deal with this shit.
HUE.
Virmanthras Philactery is best Philactery.
>>44192556
I said Malleus, not Xenos. I've seen enough of the Xenos screwing up to know I don't want anything to do with it.
>>44192605
We are sir, and the honour will be ours.
>>44192551
Don't worry about it, we'll be fine. We'll do what everyone does.
>>44192640
We are honoured that you would speak for us Mi'Lord.
Hm...yes, I think Gary deserves...Major at least. Although he'd be liable to go mad if we bumped him anything higher.
>>44192654
I got a regiment, friends, wife, and maybe a family to drink for.
An artificial liver is the only way to go. Although it does burn through chems rather fast.
>>44192727
I said if you couldn't destroy it, find someone who can. I have no idea WHO would be better equipped to destroy it, but the thing is probably Vimanthas' anchor.
>>44192748
>Blush
I-I just want to be with you. T-that will suffice for me...
>>44192767
Greely? What are you yelling about?
>>44192767
Hmm... Well at least my Chapter possesses the necessary resources. I shall find a solution.
>>44192799
Trying to get rid of our old buddy Vimanthas once and for all.
>>44192748
Thanks for the vote of confidence, Lieutenant.
>>44192754
That is why drinkings with both hands.
>>44192748
I have never been to pretoria, it will be mutual honour. Is good tie, da?
(have to go soon...)
player of field chirurgeon Rogan/Rax here. I'll go sleep now, so have fun guys
>>44192778
You will be, don't worry about it.
>>44192865
>Alice raises her hands up to her chest.
Let me tell you about the Tyranids. There were self replicating Tyranids. On Cadia, which has already got enough on it's plate.
Now....I'm not saying it was the Ordo Xenos......
