>uses a bastard sword
Actually knows who his father is
>uses a straight blade
Is OP.
>>44121707
The sword is a bastard, not the wielder.
>>44121707
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA
HOLY SHIT
FUNNIEST FUCKING THING POSTED ALL NIGHT!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAno, it wasn't :(
>>44121707
I myself am a bastard, and I know who my father is.
Bastard just means born out of wedlock, or when talking about swords it means can be wielded in either one hand or two.
>>44121707
You're an idiot.
>>44121754
The sword was forged out of wedlock. Sad story, too, mother never wanted him, a constant reminder that his father was a rapier. Just couldn't deal with a constant memento of that around.
>bastard sword
>the sword is actually pretty nice and well mannered
>>44121730
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_burn_centers_in_the_United_States Obligatory etc.
>uses a spear
>never hafts to get to the point
>uses a halberd
>is clean shaven
>uses a thompson gun
>prefers to be called Thomas
>uses a morningstar
>sleeps in late
>>44121707
You actually asked the sword to confirm this or did you just assume that the poor thing knows?
Also, I thought Bastard meant that your parents weren't married, not that you didn't know who your father was.
You find a bastard sword mounted over the fireplace in a house
>player grabs it, keeps it
>starts killing enemies with ease
>keeps getting through armor
>unstoppable force
>after many sessions a problem
>"i cast detect magic"
>bastard sword lights up like a christmas tree on fire
>reveal that its s super powerful magic ssord
>its name....Bastard Sword
>named after its creater, and enchanter Jace Bastard.
>vorpal, unbreakable, adds ac, and much, much more
>everyone realizes what an item it is, legendary even.
>hear a rumor in town, a cult was destroyed to the last man "in the starting town they found the sword"
>a dragon was slain in a village "the second town"
>weeks of this info, getting closer
>one day....
>man enters tavern, armored in pure mithril.
>hands a bag of platinum coins to the owner.
>"Thats my sword, give it back"
>>44121730
>using a shortsword
>is a big guy
>>44121707
>not even the actual definition of bastard
>uses a bastard sword
>passes it on to his only child, one conceived in wedded bliss and one he loves dearly and has tried to raise right
Marriage was in many ways complicated during most of the euro middle ages, so many bastards were indeed raised by their biological fathers
